Anyone else get this feeling? I just completed first week of fellowship in the bone marrow transplant unit. Feel completely overwhelmed and stupid. Feel like I don’t know anything and all the acronyms and stuff the attending mentions all sound like a foreign language to me. Is this normal or am I behind?
First week of heme onc fellowship, feeling overwhelmed
- Thread starter osprey099
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I'm not on yet but my cofellow said she doesn't understand half of what they're saying so I'm gonna assume it's normal... Highly doubt you're behind. Just wait until you get your first few consults on benign heme 
. You'll be like a genius for the hospitalist
. You'll be like a genius for the hospitalist
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Give it some time. Totally normal to feel that way. As a resident you don’t realize how much of a foreign language some of oncology can be, particularly malignant heme
Dude one time as a resident I went to a lecture from a visiting faculty member who was presenting something about BMT. He literally could've been speaking Chinese that whole hour and I wouldn't have known the difference. Then the PD leaned over and whispered not to worry, most attendings don't understand this stuff.
So basically my expectation of my BMT rotation is that I'll stand there with a blank stare going "I don't know any of these words." And that's ok. They will teach us the things and then we won't feel so dumb.
So basically my expectation of my BMT rotation is that I'll stand there with a blank stare going "I don't know any of these words." And that's ok. They will teach us the things and then we won't feel so dumb.
Everything you said is totally normal to go through - I mean, you're in fellowship to learn stuff, right?
There's a reason the "drinking from a water hose" analogy gets thrown around all the time - it's true.
Also, all it takes is a month of taking consults from new interns to help remind you that you have learned some stuff along the way =D
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Man, I'm just a resident, but I relate to this post so much. My first month of intern year was spent on our oncology service. I was so turned around, I didn't know what to do. HiDAC? G-CLAM? I-FART? And then just when I felt like I was getting the hang of it, I rotated through our BMT service and it was back to square one. 😅 I'm glad to see that I'm not alone -- and that it gets better with time!
Hang in there, OP. Congrats on making it through week one of fellowship! No small feat.
Hang in there, OP. Congrats on making it through week one of fellowship! No small feat.
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The beginning of my fellowship, I felt dumber than I did as a starting intern.
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Day 1 of internship, nobody expects you to know which end of the stethoscope goes in your ears.
Day 1 of fellowship, people are expecting you to make initial treatment decisions on 77yos w/ FLT3-ITD+ AML and 21yos with metastatic synovial sarcoma in the same day.
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I distinctly remember someone calling me for a consult and asking
“I know you haven’t seen the patient yet but just in your experience how do you guys usually handle this”
Me: “Sir I have no experience I’ve been doing this for 11 days.”
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Sorry should have mentioned that this is 100% normal. I think unlike something like GI or Cards our field just has so little overlap with what a general internist needs to learn that there is no way of coming into fellowship and not feeling this way.
You’ll start to feel better around January just in time for ITEs to come around and make you feel stupid all over again.
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It's ok, this is normal. Took me two years before I felt like I could at least keep up.
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This is all normal. Especially if you are starting on BMT which is probably one of the most intense of all heme/onc rotations with regards to what you're supposed to keep track of.
Just wanted to update this post as I got ITE scores back recently. Scored in the top quartile nationally as a second year fellow. If you feel discouraged when starting fellowship like I did, don't fret! This is coming from someone who didn't know what RCHOP stood for 6 months into fellowship...
Wait you got your feb 2023 ite scores back already?
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Yup ASCO ITE results came out last week.
Oh wow I didn’t receive my scores yet. Did they email you your score?
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Not directly. Our program coordinator emailed em to us.
