a daily commute to/from seattle would be miserable. it would be like commuting to DC from baltimore. sure it can be done i guess but you'd be the n of 1 and you'd get some really strange looks. gig harbor is nice (and we looked there), but you'll have the pleasure of paying $5 a day or so crossing the narrows bridge to go to work. that alone was almost for me to look elsewhere, lol. tacoma has some nice areas- along ruston way from downtown to point defiance, proctor district, any of the northern portions with a view of the sound. steilacoom has a good number of people as well, but no real "city" things around-- more of a residential community that's literally minutes from JBLM. there are some parts of tacoma that are decrepit, and areas of decrepit next to nice, but that's why you don't buy stuff unseen. it's a blue collar city.
the us open was in university place, which has (from what i've heard) the best schools in the area.
there are a fair number of people south as well-- lacey and even olympia. i didn't want to live south of the base since seatac is just that much more of a drive if you live down there. if you want more space though, it seems the place to go.
I-5 jams up for no reason at all random times, and why 16 (the tacoma narrows bridge road) does as well. i live in tacoma and my commute door to door is around 30 minutes.
overall, there are a lot of different flavors and areas-- one is bound to fit you somehow. we moved here from DC and to be honest prefer DC but the area has some nice qualities. and as a married couple in your 30's without kids, the outdoor activities are legit. it's why REI was born here-- that store is basically pacific northwest. hiking, biking, skiing (though last winter's snowfall sucked and there was basically no season), kayaking, fishing, etc etc. and ranier is visible from almost everywhere. the rain sets in in the fall and doesn't let up til spring-- not downpours just constant clouds and drizzle. but the temps are mild-- to the point most people here don't even have air conditioning.
at any rate, you'll find something, but i'd really really think about it before thinking of seattle. ask your PD, off hand, and see what their response is. i doubt it will be different.
@HighPriest is exactly right. plus, if all your colleagues live around here and you live in seattle getting together for resident activities will be basically impossible. just something else to consider.
good luck-- a year out you have plenty of time.
--your friendly neighborhood NFL at 10am?!? caveman