Y!IFMBA - Surgery Style

Q-Optics, surgical ergonomics - redefined
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All the patients come in these places
And the patients are all the same
You don't look at their comorbidities
And you don't ask their names

You don't think of them as anything but cases
You don't think of the potential complications at all
You keep your mind on the money
Keeping your eyes on the clock

I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money
I'll do any operation you want me to do
I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money
And any old risky referral will do

I make a million dollars
I live in a mansion out by the sea
Have an ex-wife and some estranged children
Yeah, I guess I pay a lot of alimony

All the patients come in these places
And the patients are all the same
You don't look at their cardiac risks
And you don't ask their names

I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money
I'll do any operation you want me to do
I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money
And any old O.R. will do

I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money
I'll do any operation you want me to do
I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money
And any old scrub nurse will do

Credit cards or dollars
Private insurance will do nicely, thank you
Let me double book you in clinic
Tell me, do you want me to schedule you for another revision again?

I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money
I'll do any operation that you want me to do
I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money
And any old first assistant will do

I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money
I'll do any operation you want me to do
I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money
And any old anesthesiologist will do

I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money
I'm your private surgeon, a surgeon for money.....
 
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Whats up with all the surgery songs lately? haha
 


On a dark deserted hallway, heading down the stairs
Warm smell of bovie smoke, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering O.R. light
My heart grew heavy and my spirit grew dim
I had to operate all night

There she stood in the doorway,
The new female attending
And I was thinking to myself,
"This transplant could be Heaven or this could be Hell"
Then she lit up the saw and she split the sternum away
There were voices down the corridor,
I thought I heard them say...

Welcome to the Hotel Surgifornia
Such a lonely place (Such a lonely place)
Such a lonely place
Plenty of room at the Hotel Surgifornia
Any time of year (Any time of year)
You can find us on call here

My ex-wife was definitely twisted, she got the Mercedes Benz...Uhhh!
She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys she calls friends
How they dance in the courtyard, sweet operating room heat sweat
Some operate to remember, most operate out of regret

So I called up the Chairman,
"Please listen to me whine"
He said, "I haven't actually operated since 1999"
And still those voices are calling from far away,
B.S. pages wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say...

Welcome to the Hotel Surgifornia
Such a lonely place (Such a lonely place)
Such a lonely place
They regretin' it up at the Hotel Surgifornia
No surgeon likes a surprise (No surgeon likes a surprise)
And they don't want to hear your alibis

Mirrors on the ceiling,
The pink donor heart on ice
And she said "We are all just gonna go off pump with this here LVAD device"
And in the Program Director's chambers,
We gathered for the rank list
Despite my steely protests
But they still ranked a female beast

Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place where Heavyweights were before
"Relax, "said the female chief,
"That era is long deceased
You can take sign-out from me any time you like,
Before I take 6 months maternity leave!"
 
ItinerantSurgeon said:
Click to expand...


If you are truly who you hint at being, then I must give you feedback, and say that there's too much effort here. Also, quality is more important than quantity.

However, if you are simply a copycat, then I actually applaud your work, as the originator may feel his reputation being tarnished, and come out of retirement for a wonderful, explosive confrontation.

Case in point: I didn't even take the time to read your lyrics above. I think I know what it's about, and it's the third/fourth one....I have a millennial attention span, after all.

However, if it IS you, and you've simply lost your edge, that's okay. I'm also not as funny or as cutting as I used to be...an unfortunate consequence of my professional growth and maturity. I find myself truly wanting to help people rather than waging a misanthropic attack on their weaknesses.
 
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Have already shared this elsewhere on social media but thought would be interesting to share here.

Just sat next to and chatted with a nice elderly lady at my allergist's office. She is turning 96 on August 18th. That makes her birthdate August 18, 1920. The day that the 19th amendment was ratified, giving American women the right to vote.

Contemplate the changes that have occurred within her lifetime for just a moment. Pretty awesome perspective.

On a related note, there are currently a total of 12 female residents/fellows in my program. While my great grandmother and and aunt were/are both physicians, neither was permitted entry to surgery, being told it "was not an appropriate choice for a woman."
 
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LucidSplash said:
Have already shared this elsewhere on social media but thought would be interesting to share here.

Just sat next to and chatted with a nice elderly lady at my allergist's office. She is turning 96 on August 18th. That makes her birthdate August 18, 1920. The day that the 19th amendment was ratified, giving American women the right to vote.

Contemplate the changes that have occurred within her lifetime for just a moment. Pretty awesome perspective.

On a related note, there are currently a total of 12 female residents/fellows in my program. While my great grandmother and and aunt were/are both physicians, neither was permitted entry to surgery, being told it "was not an appropriate choice for a woman."
Click to expand...
Isn't it amazing how much things have changed? I'm seeing a 97 year old tomorrow and I love talking with her about what she's seen in her lifetime. Thanks for sharing.
 
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LucidSplash said:
Have already shared this elsewhere on social media but thought would be interesting to share here.

Just sat next to and chatted with a nice elderly lady at my allergist's office. She is turning 96 on August 18th. That makes her birthdate August 18, 1920. The day that the 19th amendment was ratified, giving American women the right to vote.

Contemplate the changes that have occurred within her lifetime for just a moment. Pretty awesome perspective.

On a related note, there are currently a total of 12 female residents/fellows in my program. While my great grandmother and and aunt were/are both physicians, neither was permitted entry to surgery, being told it "was not an appropriate choice for a woman."
Click to expand...

I love it!!!
 
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