a sad first year

[coastie77]

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i'd imagine im not the only first year who feels like this. but in my case, it's hard not to be discouraged; i haven't been doing as well as i want to be thus far. i was a non-science major with little science coursework beyond the four major prerequisites, i think this does put me at a disadvantage. but i just feel like although i am trying really hard to go through the material i haven't taken a test since september that i've walked out confidently in. in fact, most grades teeter pretty close to failing i am most afraid of the outcome of a recent physio test. my confidence has been taking hits, and im starting to feel like i'm completely subpar to everyone else, which is an awful, awful feeling.

i dont know how to change what i've been doing. i've tried working in groups, studying the material on my own and ahead of time, and i feel like i do really understand the material, but on a test i don't feel like i'm demonstrating it...im not sure if my memorization techniques are not working or what. i feel like no matter how many times you go over the material ahead of time, it seems that the nature of these exams forces you to cram in couple of days before. is this true? or should i be reviewing the material over and over every day? if that is the case, maybe that is the problem. i definitely take time out to have some semblance of a social life, not partying every night or anything.. but i'm starting to think that maybe this isn't plausible, given my recent performances..

on top of this all, i'm not really enjoying school itself. i feel like the social dynamic really is like highschool, and while i loved my highschool experience, i remembered how much effort all of that took...and i didnt feel like i wanted to dive in head first all over again. a big part of this is probably because i already have a social network in the city, but now it's starting to bother me a bit more. i definitely have friends in the class, but maybe not a "clique" per se, which im beginning to think might make the whole experience more enjoyable. after all, we still have a couple of years left..

anyway i just needed to vent to those who might be able to empathize with any of these feelings, or have any advice to impart....thanks

 

[Doctor Bagel]

I think what you're feeling is pretty normal. Does your school have a counseling service that you can use? I'd suggest trying that just to work through some of the negative thoughts you're having that are affecting your self-esteem.

For your feelings about the tests, have you tried to do a lot of practice questions before hand? I've found that to be a successful technique for me, and it really helps me memorize those nit-picky details that drive all medical students crazy. Are those little details what you're getting at when you ask if you really do need to cram before an exam?

 

[coastie77]

yeah, those are. i did try to do a bunch of questions before hand, most of which i was getting right...but..who knows. do you have any recommendations for good physio practice qs?

 

[sprinkibrio]

i think you already answered all your questions! 🙂 you know what you need to do, it just sucks.... reading over and over so you have less to cram, going far, far out of your way to find a clique. delayed gratification and all. me, a fellow first year just started all of this recently and it's working. but slow.

 

[Doctor Bagel]

yeah, those are. i did try to do a bunch of questions before hand, most of which i was getting right...but..who knows. do you have any recommendations for good physio practice qs?

Luckily for me, my school provided us with a lot of phys practice questions, so I don't know of any other good source. I've heard BRS questions are easier than what you'll usually encounter on an exam.

 

[Engin]

Yeah similar problem. Except I'm not sad, but love myself.

I bow down to BRS Costanza Cases and problems (not to be confused with the regular BRS Costanza for physio). This book, Cases and problems, is so awesome I cannot speak it in words. It will go down as the best book of first year for me (Lippincott Biochem a second). I get the material after doing these case problems.

Of course the problem is, doing a case for a section (i.e. respiratory physiology) takes the entire day (6-7 hours of solid study). It has to be done quite in advance of a test. But, it is something I am willing to do even if my test scores don't improve much, because my understanding of physio is so much more after completing those problems. I don't waste my time with BRS Costanza problems, just do these. The regular BRS problems didn't help, nor improve my test grade.

After doing those problems, focus on your notes.

 

[nightowl]

If you don't enjoy first year, you'll probably be like the majority of students and like second year much better. I can't even compare how much better second year is for me! 😍 I had a really hard time, too. It's hard to be happy with socializing and all of the other stuff when you're scared to death of failing. Give yourself a break and know that it WILL get better. It took me practically the entire first year of school to figure out how to study. You've just got to stick it out! Most people don't really like the first two years compared to clinical rotations when it comes to the coursework and stuff.

 

[coastie77]

thanks! the words of encouragement make me feel better🙂

If you don't enjoy first year, you'll probably be like the majority of students and like second year much better. I can't even compare how much better second year is for me! 😍 I had a really hard time, too. It's hard to be happy with socializing and all of the other stuff when you're scared to death of failing. Give yourself a break and know that it WILL get better. It took me practically the entire first year of school to figure out how to study. You've just got to stick it out! Most people don't really like the first two years compared to clinical rotations when it comes to the coursework and stuff.

 

[OncoCaP]

Continue to study hard, take care of yourself, and quit worrying about grades. You might even stop looking at the grade reports altogether. Focus on learning the material, and you should know where you are in terms of your command of the material from working BRS Review Books and various USMLE Step 1 sample questions. Look for weaknesses in your knowledge and focus your effort on those parts. Although some attendings and residents (particularly OB/GYN and surgery) can be abusive, "the system" overall cannot abuse you if you don't let it. You'll pass as long as you continue to study & work hard and make sure you know the stuff (see above). If you don't know some of the material (can't figure it out, etc.), make sure you get help and don't wait until right before the exam. Treat the tests just like another homework assignment to lessen the stress. You're going to do great and help a lot of patients out there after you get your MD. Unless you're AOA, no one gives a poop what your grades were as long as you pass, which you are doing. Do well on STEP 1 and get good recommendations on your clinical rotations (make sure you ace whatever you want to go into). Think of the classes as study hall for STEP 1 and your clinical rotations.

 

[Percival]

Coastie, you are perfectly normal. Med school is tough for must of us. I've been in your shoes before. Here are my recommendations:

1) get some sleep. I was served greatly by one of our class sponsors (a female ER doc) who said "You are all Type-A personalities, which means, when you don't do well on a test, you're just going to go home and work harder. Let me tell you, working harder is not always the right answer." Try to get at least [I'd say] 7hrs of sleep, especially the night before an exam.

2) study old tests. 8-9 times out of 10, they're going to have a lot of similar questions. Rather than reading the entire text for the 3rd time, use your time better by just becoming familiar with their question styles.

3) think positive DURING exams. Tell yourself, "I've passed these tests before; this one's no different." DO NOT worse-case-scenario it by telling yourself about what happens if you fail out. Keep it positive. Do breathing exercises, chill out, take a bathroom break, etc. I like to talk a little trash to the exam myself.

4) Probably more than half of you will write me off for saying this, but I'm a Christian, and I truly believe that God has something planned for my life, so I have faith that I will get through this. I get peace from concentrating on that.

HANG IN THERE! If you're passing your classes, GREAT! That means that you're on your way to being a doctor.

If you want more advice (I'm just an M1 myself, but I have a non-science, non-traditional background, and I have a lot of life experience), just PM me.

 

[Engin]

Coastie, you are perfectly normal. Med school is tough for must of us. I've been in your shoes before. Here are my recommendations:

Try to get at least [I'd say] 7hrs of sleep, especially the night before an exam.

I hate you people. Not Christians. No, but these 7 hour sleepers before tests. Convert me. Even if I tried, i couldn't sleep. So wound up. I kinda am okay with it.

 

[coastie77]

all of this has helped, thanks guys! its so strange, because i never envisioned as "passing" as being hard. it's a tough notion to stomach...

 

[SocialistMD]

It sounds like you are having trouble adjusting to the amount of studying. That is normal. You will figure out what works best for you and second year will be much easier than first, allowing you to socialize more. I'll give you my routine, although I bet everyone here had one that was different and worked for them, so just try new things to figure out what works best for you. You do need to review older material often, so start encorporating that.

Weekdays:
9:00-12:00 class
12:00-12:30 lunch
1:00-2:30 gym or lab, depending on the day
3:00-6:30 review what we learned that day (going over class notes once for each class
6:30-7:00 dinner (7:30-9:00 gym on days with lab)
7:00-10:00 review old notes from the classes I have the next day/preread for next lectures. I mixed it up so I was reviewing for each class each day.
10:00+ my time. During first year, that was basically decompressing in front of the TV, but during second year (when I became more efficient) I would go out. A lot.

Weekends:
8:30 (or 10:00, depending on how late the night before was)-11:00 or 12:00 gym
12:00-1:00 lunch
1:00-5:30 review the last weeks notes from each class
5:30-6:30 dinner
6:30-8:00 review the notes from weeks previously
8:00+ my time.

The more review you do, the more familiar you are with the subject and the quicker it becomes as you advance in the weeks. The night before exams is typically when I did questions, and I always quit by 9:00 to give my brain some time to chill at home and then get some sleep.

Good luck.

 

[coastie77]

thanks, ill anticipate that dismissal note. in other news, i actually did fine on that physio test. sometimes its crazy the delusions you can drive yourself to...and kind of scary

 

[purpleduck]

Lots of medical students are depressed. It's an isolating, stressful experience that can throw your neurotransmitters all out of whack. In addition to studying, I'd say seek counseling and talk about the potential effectiveness of anti-depressants. They can improve mood and concentration when you're feeling like crap. I am a big fan.

Good luck! You are so not alone.

 

[SalseraDoctora]

Thank you purpleduck, coastie, and nightowl for being nice. I definitely feel this way too--it is difficult not to feel isolated when you actually are isolated because you spend so much time studying alone. I don't do well in study groups--I do much better studying by myself, and I am passing my classes so it is working for me. But I really do agree that it is difficult not to have as much social time as you wish (it definitely has been for me).

I just keep telling myself that this summer I will be back with all my friends and that after second year I will actually get to go out into the world and interact with patients instead of snuggling up to my textbooks every night, so that will be fun (or at least less isolated).

But yes, SLEEP. I love sleeping. Also working out. Also emailing my friends and asking them to write back and tell me that they still remember what I look like 🙂

Definitely you are not alone though, and it makes me feel better to know that I am not alone either 🙂 (Also I was a non-science major too and as I stay up late studying everything for the first time I feel grumpy that I didn't choose neuroscience or something a little more helpful to passing physiology. But I passed, and I am glad that you did too. Ultimately, assuming we survive this process, hopefully our non-science backgrounds will make us more interesting and more relatable to our patients too. That is what I tell myself 🙂 )

 

[TheLuckiest]

It is so wonderful to see people talking about the difficulties of medical school in a very real way. Being Type-A myself, I expect perfection. In med school, that just isn't reasonable. Med students are only human and are subject to anxiety and depression just like everyone else. By acknowledging this, talking about it, and seeking treatment when necessary, I think we do a tremendous service to our future patients. Taking care of ourselves now is key to making sure that they get the best care later.

Coastie77, I have totally been in your boat where you feel like you really understand the content and then don't do so well on the exam. Don't let it get you down. Keep your head up and persevere. One thing that helps me: just prior to the exam, I will turn on my iPod for a few "pump-me-up" songs - songs that make me feel more confident, rather than scared, about the test. (Also great for times when you're struggling to study.) Here are some of my fave songs for this purpose, just to get you thinking:

- "Another One Bites the Dust" by Queen
- "Make Yourself" by Incubus
- "If I Can't" by 50 Cent

 

[secretwave101]

This is school-dependent, but here's a rough overview (disclaimer: like everything on these boards, opinion only):

1st year is taught by PhD's. If you absolutely LOVE 1st year, you probably need to consider research instead of medicine, you might be happier there. It's a knowledge for knowledge's sake kind of environment that made me want to barf.

2nd year is taught by M.D.'s. FINALLY you're getting somewhere. Less esoteric crap. More knowledge as tools.

3rd year is clinical, and this is where you finally get a feel for what it is like to be a doc. Many med schools try to give you that feeling earlier, on the theory that it'll inspire you to make it through year 1/2. But in reality, few hospitals give you any kind of responsibility until at least 3rd year. It won't be much responsibility, but it will be some and for most of us it felt great.

4th year - more of 3rd year. 3rd year, but better because often you have a sense for what specialty you like and you get to focus on them.

Residency - OH MAN, THIS JOB SUCKS! Just kidding, the ups and downs of residency are another thread.

Here's the best study tip I know: Go over your notes IMMEDIATELY after lecture. Never let the sun (how 'bout...rise) before you've thoroughly reviewed your notes from that day. By review I mean active stuff - re-write them, make quizzes out of them, whatever keeps you interested. If you're crazy-anal about this, you are unlikely to do poorly.

 

[docscience]

Continue to study hard, take care of yourself, and quit worrying about grades. You might even stop looking at the grade reports altogether.

Unless you're AOA, no one gives a poop what your grades were as long as you pass, which you are doing. Do well on STEP 1 and get good recommendations on your clinical rotations (make sure you ace whatever you want to go into). Think of the classes as study hall for STEP 1 and your clinical rotations.

I hope this is true..especially the part about not giving a crap unless you are AOA. There are some kids in my class who are so anal that they beg for 0.1% of their grade.

I try to do as well as I can, however sometimes gunners like that make me feel like a slackerand make me feel like I am at the bottom of my class. lol

The post above this one was inspirational...I hope 2nd year is better and onward is a lot better.

 

[GatorHockeyDoc]

There are some kids in my class who are so anal that they beg for 0.1% of their grade.

Same here. After every test at my school, people piss and moan about unfair questions, unclear wording, and other bullcrap like that and inevitably a couple questions get rescinded. To me, that one extra question isn't worth begging for but those gunners try to squeeze every last point out.

 

[sendwich]

Same here. After every test at my school, people piss and moan about unfair questions, unclear wording, and other bullcrap like that and inevitably a couple questions get rescinded. To me, that one extra question isn't worth begging for but those gunners try to squeeze every last point out.

gunners = academic pimple poppers (the big juicy kind)

 

[vtucci]

To the OP, you are not alone. 1st and 2nd year is about regurgitation of facts. 3rd and 4th year is about integration and problem-solving. You may find that many students who excel in the first two years have trouble in later years and vice versa. We all have skills and if you have a non-science background you may be better at thinking outside the box and understanding concepts (great for clinical years, not so great for preclinical ones).

First year was horrible. Very esoteric as was mentioned by a previous poster and largely useless as taught by PhDs. I was lucky to pass my first year and did so only because of the shelf exams which tested clinical knowledge in anatomy and physio way more than my professors (nothing like being asked the exact nanometers of a particular nerve fiber, as if the number matters).

Second year was markedly better. More MDs in the mix as well as PhDs who recognize the value of clinically integrated teaching (maybe pathology and microbiology lend themselves more to clinical integration than biochem and straight anatomy).

Third year- better still. Hours are long and your time is not your own but decidely better than years 1&2.

Hang in there. You will muddle through.

 

[Sputnik35]

It sounds like you are having trouble adjusting to the amount of studying. That is normal. You will figure out what works best for you and second year will be much easier than first, allowing you to socialize more. I'll give you my routine, although I bet everyone here had one that was different and worked for them, so just try new things to figure out what works best for you. You do need to review older material often, so start encorporating that.

Weekdays:
9:00-12:00 class
12:00-12:30 lunch
1:00-2:30 gym or lab, depending on the day
3:00-6:30 review what we learned that day (going over class notes once for each class
6:30-7:00 dinner (7:30-9:00 gym on days with lab)
7:00-10:00 review old notes from the classes I have the next day/preread for next lectures. I mixed it up so I was reviewing for each class each day.
10:00+ my time. During first year, that was basically decompressing in front of the TV, but during second year (when I became more efficient) I would go out. A lot.

Weekends:
8:30 (or 10:00, depending on how late the night before was)-11:00 or 12:00 gym
12:00-1:00 lunch
1:00-5:30 review the last weeks notes from each class
5:30-6:30 dinner
6:30-8:00 review the notes from weeks previously
8:00+ my time.

The more review you do, the more familiar you are with the subject and the quicker it becomes as you advance in the weeks. The night before exams is typically when I did questions, and I always quit by 9:00 to give my brain some time to chill at home and then get some sleep.

Good luck.

solid schedule, hopefully you spend time with your family.

@coastie77
i know how it feels to try your best and receive mediocre marks, no matter how hard you try. just study smart and be sure to take care of yourself by exercising properly, sleeping adequately, and reviewing your notes daily!

ps: my first post in this forum! whoooppddiii doo!

 

[roja]

You are definately not alone. Medical School is HARD. At somepoint, everyone will struggle. Either in first year, second year, third year, fourth, internship, etc.

The first two years are really really hard. It is like trying to drink from a fire hydrant.

Add into that, med students in general are the top 10% of all college students. And they often haven't had to kill themselves to get there. They are now in a large group of all the top ten percenters. And well, you can't all be the top ten percent. Its okay.

We used to joke in our med school: Do you know what they call the last person in your class? Doctor. And although we all know, we don't want to be that person, there is truth in it.

Follow the advice given here. its good. Try your hardest. Make sure you are taking some time for yourself. And remember what your ultimate goals were. They weren't to be number one in your MS class: it was to be a doctor.

 

[Orthodoc40]

OP, what I have done is get a tutor (3rd or 4th year) and this person goes through practice questions and practice tests with me. I found that when I didn't get what a question was asking, which was often, if my tutor re-worded the question, I knew the answer right away. The same thing for answer choices. I'd often look at answers and be like, "I have no idea what that is, it must be right." Because my confidence was shot! When in fact now, I realize they actually are made up answers.... duh. My tutor would also read answers with me, and reword those, too. For me, it has been like learning a new language, testing language. We've been practicing for a while now, and I feel like I am getting the hang of understanding test questions much better now, because of our work together.

Not exactly a life skill I was dying to learn, but it makes school easier, for sure.

 

[Caboose]

You know what's cool though? You, as opposed to me, haven't had a lot of science. This means that while I know a lot of the material and don't have to budget my time a whole lot, (... well, less), I'm going to be learning 'how to study' in my second year when I've never seen pathology and such. This is unfortunate as evidently 2nd year sucks your soul right out of you at my school. You, however, are going through it now. I'm sure next year I'll be on SDN searching for this thread looking for people's advice on how not to cram, which I've done a whole lot of and doesn't help for boards.

Anyway, I'm procrastinating. Just thought I'd add a cheery, pastel colored piece of insight. Not having science might just be an advantage for next year.

Caboose.

 

[Orthodoc40]

You're right (how did you know this about me?!!) But I have also had to struggle with how to budget study time. My tutor is helping me with THAT, too! Basically organize my time, organize my thoughts, organize my study, organize my test approach....

Believe me, it has gotten better since football season ended 😉 but I am seriously considering giving up my cable TV service to get rid of the distractions.