- Joined
- Dec 1, 2011
- Messages
- 262
- Reaction score
- 14
Last edited:
You can still have a baby in med school... What would be your alternative to med school? Would it help you pay off the debt faster? If it's some $50k job... probably not going to be better in the long run. If it's in the 6 figures, then it's more iffy.wants to have a baby yesterday, so yes.
You can still have a baby in med school... What would be your alternative to med school? Would it help you pay off the debt faster? If it's some $50k job... probably not going to be better in the long run. If it's in the 6 figures, then it's more iffy.
You can have a baby in high school too.
wants to have a baby yesterday, so yes.
Even if you don't get called up, if you have to do 90 days, that will effectively shut down your practice, so private practice would be out.
They are all federal I already have some PSLF time on books as I currently work for a hospital. I have always intended to utilize PSLF as I will likely be grandfathered in at 100% forgiveness since I will not be a new borrower if rules change, etc. Not definite but all the experts I spoke to tell me I will almost certainly not have rug pulled out from under me.
.
One important point: there are no experts when it comes to rule changes in the PSLF program. There is no existing precedent for them to base any expertise on. The program is 100% clear that you do not have a contract with them and they are free to change the rules at any time or even eliminate the program alltogether without ever paying out a dime. Beyond that what they will choose to change (if anything), when they will choose to do it, and how/if they will grandfather in people like you is 100% speculation.
1+This.
In my opinion, you should make your decisions assuming PSLF is NOT an option. If when your time comes to pay back those loans, it still exists as it does today then great, but if you need 100% forgiveness to make med school feasible/worthwhile for you, I wouldn't risk it.
You can still have a baby in med school... What would be your alternative to med school? Would it help you pay off the debt faster? If it's some $50k job... probably not going to be better in the long run. If it's in the 6 figures, then it's more iffy.
She very much has grown up in a bubble, and I am actually surprised she isn't more of a snob.
Relationships are about compromise but it seems she thinks all the compromising should be done by you.
Part of her problem is that she comes from family of great privilege. She has never taken out a single student loan, drives Beemer, etc.
I hope this wasn't directed at me! I don't think women are all money-grubbing bitches who want to trap men into marriage and ruin their lives, but this one he's got sure sounds that wayThere's always this weird, MRA undercurrent of misogyny on here. Can't we discuss things without going into this weird myth that women are all money-grubbing bitches who want to trap you into marriage and ruin your life?
Anyway, that said, no one can tell you what to do, debt-wise, but I can tell you that marrying this girl and then not going to medical school is a recipe for unhappiness. If just being in meetings with doctors is making you unhappy and regretful, think of coming home to that every day, year after year, especially after you've had a particularly bad / boring / frustrating day at work. It's a recipe for resentment, and it's asking to have your marriage end in divorce.
It sounds like she's not supportive of you going to medical school, and as someone who is 31 and in medical school, you are going to need a supportive partner. It's different than being 22, in a lot of good and bad ways, but one thing that is REALLY important is having a partner who understands why your life doesn't look like the lives of everyone else your age (house, dog, 2.5 kids, 401k, etc.). It sounds like your girlfriend has gotten to a point in her life where she wants all that (which is fair and not crazy), but it sounds like you're not there yet (which is also fair.)
There's always this weird, MRA undercurrent of misogyny on here. Can't we discuss things without going into this weird myth that women are all money-grubbing bitches who want to trap you into marriage and ruin your life?
No one is saying she's a crazy betch for wanting these things, we're saying she's a crazy betch for trying to coerce the OP into sacrificing the life he envisions for himself to give her the life she sees for herself lol.She is not a crazy b**ch for wanting a family at this stage in her life or for not wanting to go through the stress and sacrifice that is being married to someone pursing an MD. She's not crazy for wanting a future husband with "regular" work hours or who is not a service member that will be going on duty, even if it is only 90 days every 3-5 years. At the same time YOU are not crazy or wrong for wanting to pursue an MD or even for having that goal be a priority over a relationship. You have to decide what sacrifices you can and can't live with and go from there. Again, you can love someone but recognize that the two of you simply are not compatible in the long term because of conflicting life-goals/visions for your future.
No one is saying she's a crazy betch for wanting these things, we're saying she's a crazy betch for trying to coerce the OP into sacrificing the life he envisions for himself to give her the life she sees for herself lol.
Meh, I think giving an ultimatum is a form of coercion, but whatevs.I don't think anyone is being misogynistic here, and I never said such. I am simply saying that, without being present for the conversation to hear her exact words/tone, I don't think she's crazy for being clear and explicit in saying that she doesn't want to be with him if he pursues this new path. That's not coercion, that's just honesty. However, as I mentioned in my last post, he is now perfectly capable of responding by walking away from the relationship to find someone who wants the same things he does and is willing to be supportive of him during this next phase of his life.
Bro, you haven't even been dating a year and she's making ultimatums left and right plus trying to direct your life to her bidding. Sounds like a great marriage in the making. Funny thing is that she's on her second residency, but wont let you have a second choice in life. At 300,000 in debt and 75K pre-tax income you should start medical school next year. Get that JD-MD you want.
All loans are PSLF eligible and I have 2 years in the bank already. As I mentioned above, the national guard option would cover all of my tuition and I receive 2k/month if I sign on for more time. This would hold the current debt load steady and possibly decrease balance through end of residency. Thus I would only need to borrow for cost of living. I would think after residency I could be pulling in at least $200k/year.
Have you thought about what the national guard would mean for your residency and practice afterward?All loans are PSLF eligible and I have 2 years in the bank already. As I mentioned above, the national guard option would cover all of my tuition and I receive 2k/month if I sign on for more time. This would hold the current debt load steady and possibly decrease balance through end of residency. Thus I would only need to borrow for cost of living. I would think after residency I could be pulling in at least $200k/year.
Thanks. I spoke to her last night about the national guard thing and she said that 90 deployment every 3-5 years is not compatible with getting married and starting a family. I wish she were more supportive. She said she could get behind it if I had way (i.e. win lottery) to finish residency 100% student debt free. Part of her problem is that she comes from family of great privilege. She has never taken out a single student loan, drives Beemer, etc. She very much has grown up in a bubble, and I am actually surprised she isn't more of a snob.
There's a case for both. From her perspective (and her family's, probably): How is being $300k in debt + more by the end of it and not earning an income until he's 40 better than the guy who's always on-and-off unemployed, while she's working hard as a doctor to support herself, him, and the family?I don't think she's being unreasonable. Op is being unreasonable by wanting to go to medical school for bad reasons when he is old and in debt