Acquiring a derm mentor holy blessing?

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DermGunner

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I will be attending a top 10 medical school next year and I wanted to get a jump start on matching derm. When I seek out a prestigious mentor who can match me into any program simply by snapping his/her fingers, how do I answer the why derm question? I assume, I just say, I want to maximize the equation [money/(stress+hours)]. You see I really want to make $500k+ in private practice while working 20 hours a week and taking 20 weeks of vacation. Or $1 million+ while complaining to everyone how I'm overworked at 45 hours a week and have only 8 weeks of vacation (practically slavery). I desire to only serve the uber rich and prescribe $100,000 stem cell creams. Occasionally, I will volunteer at a free medical clinic (4 hours/year) and spend the entire time taking selfies with my patients to use in my marketing campaigns. You see, like the uber rich, I enjoy paying lip service to the act of pretending to care about the underserved. Totally irrelevant to the topic at hand, but do you think I am overpaying my illegal alien maid too much? I am giving her $2/hour (I am such a giving person) and the other day she forgot to clean under the window seal of one of the 500 windows in my mansion. Doesn't she know her job isn't even stressful compared to that of a dermatologist?!

Or do you guys think it would be advantageous to pretend that I had a bunch of terrible skin conditions growing up and that a dermatologist saved my life? I'm just really trying to figure out how I can get a dermatologist mentor to even look at me. They are practically gods among these animals who call themselves doctors. I know that derm mentors are the gatekeepers of derm match heaven, the true Valhalla of career paths. How do I acquire the blessing of these most holy beings? I promise I will gunner my way to a 99.99% Step 1 score! I promise to write all the research papers for them! I will even sell my soul for the most prestigious title one can ever be bestowed, to one day be called, DERMATOLOGIST!

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