(Actually) Don't put things in your application that you aren't comfortable talking about IN DEPTH!!!!

[carrotsandhummus]

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I saw this advice before submitting my applications, but still chose to disclose an assault which impacted my involvement in a couple activities in my applications for a couple schools which asked for this type of information. I regret this (a lot). I had an interview with my top choice school, and they honestly kind of grilled me on it. Not like a “how did you respond” (which one school did, and that was honestly fine), but like really grilled me to the point where it was uncomfortable.

I’m honestly a pretty open person, and I don’t mind talking about it, but I was not ready for that level of scrutiny on something that personal in an interview.

I’m sharing this because you might generally see this advice, and decide that you’ll share something sensitive anyways because it’s the honest answer to a question on an application. You may not get questions about it, but there’s always a chance that you will end up feeling like you’re defending yourself and your choices in a situation that no person should have had to face in the first place. The other people interviewing probably won’t get these questions, and the tone of their interview will be much different than yours.

To summarize, please fully consider if you’ll be comfortable talking about something (with no bounds) before it goes in your application.

 

[LindaAccepted]

I saw this advice before submitting my applications, but still chose to disclose an assault which impacted my involvement in a couple activities in my applications for a couple schools which asked for this type of information. I regret this (a lot). I had an interview with my top choice school, and they honestly kind of grilled me on it. Not like a “how did you respond” (which one school did, and that was honestly fine), but like really grilled me to the point where it was uncomfortable.

I’m honestly a pretty open person, and I don’t mind talking about it, but I was not ready for that level of scrutiny on something that personal in an interview.

I’m sharing this because you might generally see this advice, and decide that you’ll share something sensitive anyways because it’s the honest answer to a question on an application. You may not get questions about it, but there’s always a chance that you will end up feeling like you’re defending yourself and your choices in a situation that no person should have had to face in the first place. The other people interviewing probably won’t get these questions, and the tone of their interview will be much different than yours.

To summarize, please fully consider if you’ll be comfortable talking about something (with no bounds) before it goes in your application.

Sorry you had this experience, but you are giving excellent advice. If a topic will make you cry or cringe, don't put it in your application.

 

[Mr.Smile12]

I am very sorry you had this experience.

I have always warned people to be psychologically prepared to discuss anything you put down in your application in interviews and thereafter. I agree it is telling how the school decided to address this issue, and the admissions leadership should be aware how delicately to approach such topics.

 

[carrotsandhummus]

I am very sorry you had this experience.

I have always warned people to be psychologically prepared to discuss anything you put down in your application in interviews and thereafter. I agree it is telling how the school decided to address this issue, and the admissions leadership should be aware how delicately to approach such topics.

For sure.

I think it's easy to tell yourself you'll be comfortable talking about things like this when you're the one thinking of potential questions someone could ask.

I completely agree that training interviewers on approaching these topics is necessary.

I'm going to put this very bluntly for people who are considering including topics like this in their application:

• Are you going to be okay telling a complete stranger about one of your most vulnerable moments?
• You could get questions which find fault in decisions you made around a very personal moment you shouldn't have been in in the first place. Are you going to be comfortable with this, and will you be able to go through the rest of your interview on a positive note?
• You could get questions around if you're equipped to handle medical school because you couldn't go through life seamlessly after an assault. That's not fun lol.
• Consider that you have a 30 minute interview which decides whether or not you get into med school. There's a chance you spend 15 minutes talking about an experience that you had no control over in the first place. Had this not been in my application, I would have loved to spend that time talking about my research, or community service , or clinical experiences, or hobbies. These made up 90% of my application, while the assault was a 200 word blurb on "hey this happened, and that's why I had to pause a couple activities". Is this what you want to be remembered by?

I completely understand that these experiences can impact your life drastically. If a trauma visibly had an impact on multiple activities, grades, etc, your situation is very different, and I get that disclosing the event might be a necessity. I also understand that for some people, this motivates their activities and advocacy going forward.

Personally, the only visible changes in my application due to this event were quitting a job (not clinical or research) and an activity-no one would have noticed or cared if I didn't explain the event (which is why I wish I wouldn't have). This is just my experience, and you should absolutely be your most authentic self, and disclose this if you're comfortable doing so. I also realize that this is not the direction most interviewers will go! You might not get questions, and you might get only the general questions you anticipate. In that case, everything's all good.

Just realize that discussing the topic doesn't mean you only disclose the parts of it you're okay with and have control over.

That's all lol, just sharing in case anyone applying in the future has this on their mind at all.

 

[Fluidity of Movement]

I am sorry and appreciate you sharing your experience. I see these types of threads and it's always concerning.

I practice some lines on how I would move on from a topic / politely decline to answer. Interviewers are still just people, and it's ok to put up boundaries respectfully. It's supposed to be a conversation. We can't always anticipate how we are going to feel / react in the moment, even with practice. I know I have many touchy subjects in my PS, and I want to let other people into my world and my mind, but at the same time I have the right to revoke that consent at any point.

Nobody should feel forced to talk about things, even if they went in expecting to talk about it and felt confident on the topic. I feel like in that type of situation it is easy for there to be a perceived power-disparity, and that can lead to negative outcomes for the interviewee.

Peace and blessings to you.

 

[Nontrad_FL_LGBT]

Can I ask the experts... Is this acceptable behavior in a med school interview? If you heard about a colleague doing stuff like this how would you respond?

If a colleague in my current career started asking someone about their sexual assault in depth and implying things like this, they'd immediately be getting dragged into HR and/or fired.

 

[Moko]

Can I ask the experts... Is this acceptable behavior in a med school interview? If you heard about a colleague doing stuff like this how would you respond?

If a colleague in my current career started asking someone about their sexual assault in depth and implying things like this, they'd immediately be getting dragged into HR and/or fired.

Anything on the application is technically fair game for discussion; however, just because a topic is fair game does NOT mean that anything goes.

Without knowing exactly what was said though and in what context, hard to have any further opinion(s). But in general, there are still boundaries that should be respected. Just my thoughts.

 

[Angus Avagadro]

OP, I am.sorry you experienced this. Although posted before on SDN that everything in your app is fair game to discuss, you have performed a service for future applicants by highlighting what can happen. Thank you. In summary, to future applicants, don't add anything to your app that you are not willing to discuss or might upset you to the point of affecting your performance. Good luck and best wishes.

 

[Goro]

Anything on the application is technically fair game for discussion; however, just because a topic is fair game does NOT mean that anything goes.

Without knowing exactly what was said though and in what context, hard to have any further opinion(s). But in general, there are still boundaries that should be respected. Just my thoughts.

Ditto this.

At my school, we have a specific policy that in our interviews, we can't and don't ask major triggering questions.