anybody else gonna be a parent in med school?

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JCPhelps

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Ok somehow I feel like a schmoe for saying this but I just gotta tell somebody. So here goes....well this girl and I have created a baby...yes it's true. Anyhow after the episode it seems we both have no intention on wanting a relationship. That sounds really bad I suppose but I(and she) thinks that getting married for a pregnancy will make the situation bad. Like why would you marry someone you didn't love....for that matter why would you have sex with someone you didnt' love. Gah!!!...humans🙂 She asked how I was gonna be about it....of course I'll admit I was freaked out at first but she was too. I told her it didn't have to be like it typically is where the mother does most of the raising, in fact I could do most of it. She seemed really open to that idea, but I think a 50/50 would be more ideal. We also both agreed that we dont' want custody hearings and child support places to even be a factor. We are going to have an agreement between me and her exclusively drawn up. Actually I dunno why I'm telling this, just wanted to I suppose and get some of your thoughts on it. I know single parents aren't the norm in med school, and I still have 2 yrs of undergrad to do. And I dunno why but I'm only seeing the positive sides of this. Geez I'm writing like Biodude lol. Ok seriously, yeah we shouldn't have done anything in the first place but it's done so that's no a consideration anymore. Is what we are planning just stupid, or do you all think this is the right way to handle this situation. I certainly think it is the right way and am excited about it actually(scary i know🙂) ok I'm off for now. Peace.
 
i have to commend you on that fact that u didnt run out on her, although thots like,"condom?" come to mind, i will save them.
 
Originally posted by JCPhelps
Is what we are planning just stupid, or do you all think this is the right way to handle this situation. I certainly think it is the right way and am excited about it actually(scary i know🙂) ok I'm off for now. Peace.

Well, surprise or not - I still have to say congrats! Nothing in my life has affected me more than having children - and that in a good way. A baby is a terribly exciting thing! 🙂

I'll second the idea that getting married for the sake of a child is almost always a bad idea. If you had no relationship (and intended to have no relationship) with this woman, then it's probably best that you don't rush into anything that neither of you were planning for. Believe me - I think I have a little firsthand insight on this :laugh: (my husband and I had a "shotgun wedding," and both his brothers married and shortly thereafter divorced women that they had one-night stands with who ended up pregnant).

Certainly being a single parent isn't going to be easy, but my philosophy is you can accomplish anything that you set your mind to, that you want badly enough - if you give it enough effort. 🙂

Good luck!
 
Congratulations to both you and the mommy-to-be. Although it's not the optimal situation for your goals, you are doing the right thing by sticking with it (them). I have 2 kids now (2 yrs and 4 wks respectively) and have a couple of years yet to go before I apply (non-trad post-bac). Although I am not a single parent, I like many others am going forward with this career choice and have a wonderful family to support me along the way. Like manna, I firmly believe you can do anything you set your mind to. Children are a wonderful thing and I wish the best for you.
 
Originally posted by immediatespring
i have to commend you on that fact that u didnt run out on her, although thots like,"condom?" come to mind, i will save them.

hmm.. thoughts such as "accidents happen" come to mind on my end. "use a spell checker" is another thought for the quoted poster as well😀..

anyway, I think the OP is doing the right thing; just make sure that you make a strong effort to spend time with your child and participate directly in their care. My ex-bf has a daughter with another ex-gf, told her he would always be there for their child, left for college and came back once a month at most (a lot of time that he didn't spend with his daughter). He now lives 700 miles away from his little girl and never sees her.

I actually was hoping to meet my future husband, get married, and have a baby at the end of 3rd year, take a year off, then come back to finish school. Didn't happen, but I have heard of others who've done it..
 
Originally posted by irlandesa
hmm.. thoughts such as "accidents happen" come to mind on my end. "use a spell checker" is another thought for the quoted poster as well😀..


spellchecker for?
 
Well I have to say I was not expecting those replies...but very relieved indeed. I guess the negative I came up with was that I'll probably have to slow down on school a bit which will extend it past 2 yrs but in the big picture I don't think that will amount to anything so I'm not worried about it. In fact I have more reason to finish now than I did before🙂 Oh yeah if it's a boy---Walker. How does that sound? Anyhow thanks for yalls insight in the matter it is much appreciated. Peace😛
 
Congrats on your new bundle of joy!

I usually don't post much but I really felt inclined to reply to your post. I am in school and also a parent of a two year old. Let me tell you that being a parent is the toughest yet most rewarding experience of my life. It helped me mature and really appreciate life. I was now responsible for the well being of another human! I love my son to death and we have great times together. I think that your decision to not get married was wise. I think children pick up on the vibes if their parents don't love eachother. My best advice to you is get what you can done before the baby comes. After the baby comes, try to spend as much quality time with the baby as you can. For me, I put my son to bed a 8pm everyday so that I can study, but before then, I play with him so that he gets enough one on one with me. I hope that everything will work out for you in the end. Good luck!

P.S. Walker seems like a nice name. I am glad that you will be there for your son. But if you won't "Walker" seems harsh. I had an experience working at the hospital, there was a baby who had a questionable sex and they named the baby "aMANda". Food for thought.
 
I've got to agree with the other posters about everything.

You may want to hit the Allopathic, Osteopathic, or spouses and partners forums, as the people there may have some good advice on how to handle a family in med school.

Goodluck!
 
JCPhelps,
I think you should speak with this girl about adopting the baby out to a married couple.

Because you are not marrying the girl, the child is going to suffer. I have several relatives who are single mothers and the children really are not doing well. Finances become a huge factor also.

The child needs a father. Remember if you go to medical school, then you will be moving a lot: moving to a medical school which may be thousands of miles away from the child, and moving again during residency and then moving when you start your practice. I think it will be almost impossible for you to establish and maintain a good relationship with this child. Not to mention if the girl ends up getting pregnant from someone, moves in with someone else, or marries someone else.

The best thing is for the child to be adopted out. I have adopted a child myself and love her the same as I love my other two children. You would be giving your child the chance to have a loving, mature, stable, two-parent househould. You could choose who the parents would be.
 
Originally posted by immediatespring
spellchecker for?

For mis-spelling thoughts as thots you *******-and keep your society ignorant ass out of these convos, you are so innocent you probably still suck ur little thumb

To the OP.. you are a stand up guy, youll make a super solid doc, good luck and NO you are doing the exact right thing for that kid.. solid parents.. commendable
 
Originally posted by Ramoray
For mis-spelling thoughts as thots you *******-and keep your society ignorant ass out of these convos, you are so innocent you probably still suck ur little thumb


u are an illiterate idiot, u arrrogant fool, did i spell that right? the next time u get the urge to post again, remove the stick up ur a$$, unwanted bastard.
 
if you are really serious about being a permanent part of this child's life (which i hope you are). the best thing i can say is get a plan worked out in writing with the mom. i know that now it seems you will both be reasonable and keep the baby's interest first, but i've seen how quickly things can change with my own brother and its important to work things out ahead of time to avoid that. like, what will be the plan if you leave the state for med school? will the mom move too? because that could create a big problem with seeing your child if you are 100s of miles apart. talk about this and work this out and get it in a legally binding agreement while relations are good between you and this girl.
 
republicandr---appreciate your insight as well. The topic was brought up during our 'freakout' phase. And I have to add it is an option, but I know myself and I know that I am perfectly capable of handling this. I just know too many people who make it work.

Ramoray---thanks for your comments as well...makes me feel all good inside:laugh: seriously I do consider myself a stand up guy, I'm glad it was that apparent.

Of coures I'm not gonna walk away like nothing happened....I know this is probably the popular thing to do...well it seems like alot of guys do it. But it's mine---part me---how much more of a connection can you have? And how could you walk away from that? Just my thoughts. Until later--Peace.
 
gogiants---yes we are going to do that. We both agree since we aren't gonna have a relationship that it is smart, thanks for your comments as well.
 
Originally posted by republicandr
JCPhelps,
Because you are not marrying the girl, the child is going to suffer. I have several relatives who are single mothers and the children really are not doing well. Finances become a huge factor also.

As a divorced mother of 1 child, I have to say that I'm doing just fine. While I admit that finances are tight, I manage to splurge every now and then on a St Johns purse for my daughter or a pair of Stuart Wietzman shoes for myself😉 My daughter recently made the honor roll at one of the best schols in the county we live in and enjoys her biweekly ballet classes too.

My point of saying all this is to say that first and foremost there are other ways to becaome a single parent like the death of a spouse. For some reason people never think about this until it happens to them. Does the world end because of it? No, but I admit single parenting can be difficult at times although far from impossible even with medical school.

I'd also say it's more important for a child to have a male and female person in their lives that loves and cares about them than to have one or two mediorce parents. It's about the role models in a child's life that influences the adults they become not necessarily the people with whom they have a biological conncetion.

To the OP, congradulations on the baby and PM me if you have any other questions/concerns. Believe me with the 2 of you working together you can do it!
 
Originally posted by irlandesa
hmm.. thoughts such as "accidents happen" come to mind on my end.

Skiing accidents happen... children accidents shouldn't happen (at least not nrealy as often as they do)... there's no reason. The pill is like 99% effective and you can get it for free.


But anyway... what's done is done. While I understand why you want to do this outside of the courtroom... if you really never had much of a relationship with this woman you might want to talk to an attorney just for advice.

Also... GET A PATERNETY TEST!!

Lots of people are single parents.... you can make it work 🙂
 
relatively prime---so you think I shouldn't take her word that it's mine? 😱 Gah that thought hadnt' even crossed my mind, but I guess it could happen like that. Seems like that would be a difficult thing to bring up. Well not seems like it....it would be.

Anybody else?
 
JCPhelps...

Congratulations to you. 🙂 I know things are going to be tough, but I hope as soon as you see your babys ultrasound, or see him/her born, you're so filled with joy that all the tough stuff won't matter as much.

Yes, it was an accident. But that can't be helped, and theres no reason for you to give it a second thought. Your babys mother is lucky to have a guy like you who is willing to stick around and be responsible. And vice versa. It seems that although you two will have an unorthodox relationship, your baby will be loved and well cared for, regardless of your situation.

And although adoption is something that you can consider, just because you two are not married does not mean you can't be good parents. Although my parents were married when I was growing up, my father is in the Navy and I saw him much less than some of my friends with divorced parents saw their fathers. But I never lacked anything, I was loved deeply by both of my parents, and I had a good family network around me that provided my with positive male and female role models. I have never felt that I was "cheated" out of a father, or that not having him around as much lessened his love for me. This is YOUR BABY, you made him/her, and just because you don't love its mother doesn't mean you need to hand him/her over to a new set of parents. Best of luck to you. 😀

And BTW...I would DEFINITLEY see a lawyer, even though you've come to an amicable agreement. She may not want child support now, and may be fine with 50/50 custody now...but we women are notorious for changing our minds!
 
Originally posted by JCPhelps
relatively prime---so you think I shouldn't take her word that it's mine? 😱 Gah that thought hadnt' even crossed my mind, but I guess it could happen like that. Seems like that would be a difficult thing to bring up. Well not seems like it....it would be.

Anybody else?

I'm not trying to say she'd lie to you... but it's possible that she doesn't even know for sure. Maybe she honestly thinks it's your baby but it isn't. You really should get a paternity test... just tell her that it wasn't your idea... tell her your parents want you to get the test (which, I'm sure they do).
 
I think Rel. Prime is correct. Because neither of you has been in an exclusively monogamous relationship you should make sure that this kid is yours. Don't sign any legal docs until you are totally comfortable that this is your kid.
 
Hello- I am RepublicanDr's wife, and like him, I feel adoption is the best option. Call me a hypocrite, if you will, since I chose to keep my daughter as a single parent when she was first born. I had no support from the birthfather, and it's evident that you desire to show full support to your child, which is a very very different situation, indeed. But, to be honest with you, I am afraid you may be setting yourself up for a painful future.

Some posters have discussed their personal experiences raising a child as a single parent-- it can be done. Everyone knows that. But, has anyone posted with your exact dilema? You are the father, and the court systems do not think much of your rights over this child. You could block an adoption, but you could not block an abortion of this child. The idea that the courts would grant you 50-50 cusotdial arrangement is highly unlikely. The chances that the mother would want this arrangement after the baby's born is also unlikely. Trust me, feelings of bitterness and anger at you will come from her. She will not want to share her child with you. This is an emotional, scary time for you. She intensely wants you to be part of this child's life in any way possible, but I am afraid that pure baby logistics will kick in at some point. I don't know her at all, so I'm just speaking from my experience of course, but I would urge you to be cautious.

How realistic is it that she could have gotten pregnant by another guy? If you think this is a real possibility, then go for the paternity test. Otherwise, this will damage your relationship extremely... You could put the blame on your parents, but that would no doubt damage their relationship with the baby (their grandchild) as well. If you aren't entirely sure that it's probably the baby is somebody else's, this may be an issue you don't want to breach. The message to the woman is that she's a slut and you want an escape.

Finally, you must understand that she will most likely meet someone someday (you both are young? 20-ish?) and will get married. She will then transfer her needs for a daddy figure to that man, who your son will begin to call Daddy. And you will be finishing up med school, ready to go to residency. Will she pack up her kid, new husband, and new kids to go follow you to residency so that her child may have a "relationship" with his birthfather? This is so emotionally difficult. I can't imagine the heartache you would feel if, and most likely when, this happens.

You truly have a difficult situation, and I empathize. I don't mean to be harsh, just realistic. I think some of the posters are too romantic about the process. It's gut-wrenching. There's so much at stake. My advice would be that if you can't marry the girl, try to convince her to give the child up for adoption. This is extraordinarily difficult and painful in itself. But once the child is born, you as a "birthfather" will have precious few "rights" over the child. If you were to marry her, you would have rights. And perhaps that would be in the best interest of the child. I firmly believe that when you create a child, that child's best interests become of primary importance. Your love life becomes secondary. Many will say that watching their parents bicker because they weren't "in love" was very damaging. I never thought of my folks as luvvy-duvvy, but I never doubted that they were committed to us kids.

This is different for a man than a woman, which I think is important to consider. Even if she says now that she will never try to gouge you for child support or force you to relinquish your parental rights so that her new husband can adopt your child, 5 years from now she may be singing a completely different song.

I wish you luck- go into this cautiously, though.
 
Originally posted by republicandr
Even if she says now that she will never try to gouge you for child support or force you to relinquish your parental rights so that her new husband can adopt your child, 5 years from now she may be singing a completely different song.

This is d efinitely good advice and getting the partenity test to be sure is also a good idea. I would also like to comment that you should set up child support payments with her (legally) whether or not she wants it. Like the above poster has said, people change their mind in this process and you wouldn't want it to look 5 years from now, like you haven't done anything for the child. This would infuriate most judges and because you're a man could mean HUGE problems for you.

If you think she might try to remove your parental rights why not petiton for full custody yourself and to be on the safe side make sure the childs last name is the same as yours on the birth certificate. That way if she trys anything crazy, you can have her arrested for kidnapping.

I think what we're all trying to say is to prepare yourself for the worse case scenarios some of which hads been highlighted. But to be on the safe side, see a family attorney. Most states have free services if money is a problem.

Finally, who your child calls daddy has a lot to do with whom he/she sees as a daddy figure. It sounds like you plan to be a part of your childs life, so I doubt very seriously he/she would call another man daddy and not you. I've never called my stepdad "daddy" although I love him as much as my biological dad.
 
republicandr (and wife),
While you both have good intentions, your advice to give the baby up for adoption seems harsh, especially since the OP and mother have already decided to keep the baby. You can't say that the baby will definitely suffer by staying with its natural parents since they are not married or that it would definitely be better off with adopted parents. I think you may be painting a romantic picture of adoption.

If you have two able adults who are willing to take responsibility for their actions, I don't think you should dissuade them from being parents. They obviously seem like they will love this baby very much, and as long as they remain level headed and respectful of one another with their decision making, their child should be okay.

Many will say that watching their parents bicker because they weren't "in love" was very damaging

But do you think the majority of them would have rather been raised by adoptive parents than by their own blood? Regardless of the pain they experienced, I doubt that they would have wanted to grow up without their biological parents. I believe adoption has its place in certin scenarios. I just don't think this one is it...Non-traditional families can work if those involved reach a certain level of understanding and commitment.


JCPhelps,
I had my first child during undergrad too. As long as you stay focused and organized, you'll do fine. Good luck to you. I hope everything works out well.
 
You might not even need the paternity test. When the baby is born, just check out its blood type and see if it's possible for it to be yours. Could you save the argument that would almost certainly ensue. Plus it's good review for the mcats to go over blood types. Anyway, good luck to you.
 
Originally posted by ccCrazie
You might not even need the paternity test. When the baby is born, just check out its blood type and see if it's possible for it to be yours. Could you save the argument that would almost certainly ensue. Plus it's good review for the mcats to go over blood types. Anyway, good luck to you.

Oh please... that's bull and you know it. The kid could have the right blood type and still not be his.
 
I think crazie was referring to the blood test as a way to rule out the kid as opposed to confirming. I think its a clever and non-confrontational option.
 
Hey Relatively Prime, can you read or are you illiterate? Let me repeat myself.... "You MIGHT not even need a paternity test....see if it's POSSIBLE to be yours....COULD save you the argument...." I am well aware of blood types and how they work, and I never told him that this was a foolproof test. I just said that there are some that don't match up and it could tell him that the kid's not his. So next time try reading more than every third word in the sentence as it greatly improves comprehension. "Paying attention" is a good skill for any physician so you should try practicing it now before patients are depending on you. God help them if they must.
 
Thank you alphabeta53. You've displayed a level of comprehension that is commendable and will hopefully serve as an example to those such as relatively prime who are not as fortunate.
 
Originally posted by ccCrazie
Hey Relatively Prime, can you read or are you illiterate? Let me repeat myself....

Lord... no need to get all nasty about it. You people are so on edge. My god!

I still don't think this is a good idea. Can't they do a paternity test before the kid is even born? If they can... it might be nice to know before the kid is born... or else he may be paying for a lot of pre-natal care for a kid that's not even his... not to mention the emotional attachment that might occur during the pregnancy.
 
Originally posted by ccCrazie
Thank you alphabeta53. You've displayed a level of comprehension that is commendable and will hopefully serve as an example to those such as relatively prime who are not as fortunate.

chill out dude... it was a simple misunderstanding... SORRY!


just get a drink and relax... geez... Are you waiting to hear form med schools or something? 😉
 
Originally posted by ccCrazie
Thank you alphabeta53. You've displayed a level of comprehension that is commendable and will hopefully serve as an example to those such as relatively prime who are not as fortunate.

ccCrazie, I can also appreciate your nonconfortational method to determine paternity. It would probably save the young woman's feelings too!

However, lets not forget that marriage is in no way a guarentee of a child's paternity. In one of the families I study for inherited forms of melanoma, I have a family where the mom and dad have dark hair/ dark eyes. 3 of the 4 children also have dark hair/dark eyes. One of the middle children has blond hair/blue eyes? Guess what the DNA fingerprint showed?.😱

Off the subject but I think everyone gets my drift.
 
Alright, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt RP. It just seems like every time I reply to a post I get someone picking apart what I say and I don't understand why.

And yes I am waiting to hear from med schools now and I'm quite stressed about it so I tend to explode rather easily. I just can't take the waiting anymore..... Anyway, sorry about that. Is the drink on you? 🙂
 
Originally posted by ccCrazie
I just can't take the waiting anymore..... Anyway, sorry about that. Is the drink on you? 🙂

Sure! This wait is killing all of us!!

I guess it's better than JCPhelps's wait... he's going to have to wait ~9 months~ to see if the kid is his! lol
 
one love- I understand that you have a personal interest in this, having had a child while in undergrad. I had my daughter before I began college, but went through college raising her as a single mom. I advise about adoption simply because I looked into it very seriously and have tremendous respect for adoptive parents and for adoptees and for the whole process. This isn't a judgment statement- I didn't after all choose to adopt out my daughter. But, you make a good point that the OP has already ruled out adoption. Even though I don't buy your point about the importance of "blood". Every adopted child will probably feel rejected at some point from a genetic heritage stance, but being raised in an intact family is an awesome gift to give a child, rare as it is.

JC- maybe you should contact a lawyer and see what is possible. I am totally skeptical about the possibility of drawing up a binding agreement that would keep you geographically located close to her and your child, regardless of if it is YOU who must move 100s or 1000s of miles away for med school education and beyond. I am also skeptical about being able to draw up meaningful child support arrangements at this point. I have heard of it too many times that the mother takes the man back to court to "reassess" the child care needs. Now, I'm in support of the woman getting as much child support as she needs, and I think the woman and child are entitled to quite a bit, but say you graduate from residency with loads of debt. The judge will "consider" that, but would most likely award her a nice monthly increase based on your new monthly income.

Speaking of money, paternity tests in utero are expensive. So are they once the baby's been born. Be diplomatic- I love the idea of checking blood types as a first possible means of determining paternity. You can be totally subtle, then if things don't gel, you could get the test done to make your case. I imagine the mother-to-be has her own health care coverage, so I doubt you'd be hit with that bill, but it would behoove you to go to her pre-natal visits and be a super-supportive guy in the meantime.

Also, for those who say you should go for full custody, good luck! I doubt she would go for that at all. Getting her to give the child your last name would probably be meaningless, too, and her dad would inevitably have something to say about that. These are issues a good lawyer could help you with. But the mommy still has pretty good protection in the courts to keep the child with her at all costs, unless you can prove she's an insane drugged up threat to the child and needs to be jailed.

As far as another man calling your child "Daddy", please understand the context. If you go away to medical school, away to residency, and see your child a few weekends of the year, that may be ALL you can do. I am extremely dubious that she will pick up and follow you as you pursue your degree. So you will have a limited relationship with your child under that scenario, no matter how golden your intentions are right now. What in the world would keep your child from identifying with a step-dad as "Daddy" if you, by virtue of your education and career, were gone most of the time? I can't imagine how painful this would be for you. Entirely hypothetical, of course, but how likely is it that you will be able to do your education, residency training, and career all in the same city where she and your child live. How likely is it that she will pick up and follow you around the country if need be? Do you know her well enough to know that she is so committed to you, the biodad, being a meaningful presence in her child's life that she would disrupt her life so many times to follow you? If she is that committed, go ahead.

Ultimately, I'm not questioning your parenting ability, your desire to be dadddy, or any of that. I'm so very practical with regards to time and location, and the mother's needs and desires which eventually may run counter to yours. Talk to a lawyer, but I doubt there's a way to force her to move whenever you do. I think the judge would see your pursuing a medical career as your choice. So if you were to choose to go to school, you'd choose to leave your child behind and visit when you could.

I do hope that a MAN who has been in your position responds. Single MOMS are different. As the dad, you have much less power and say over day-to-day decisions that will affect your child, even if you are married! Being unmarried, and not in a relationship, I just don't know how many rights you would have.
 
I don't agree single moms are all that different and I have about 4 males friends that are single Dads (I even dated 2 of them). So I think I can speak through my vicarious expereinces with them in this matter.

As for deciding on medical school, if raising your child with the mother is important then decide NOW that you will ONLY attend medical school in an area near the child's mother (hopefully you live in a state with many choices). Women makes these types of choices ALL THE TIME for men so I don't think anyone will frown on you choosing to do the same. As a matter of fact, I would applaud you for making this choice.

As for the possibility of her moving, your lawyer can help you get an injunction to prevent her from moving which is exactly what 2 of my single dad friends did.

The idea that Dad's have far less rights than Moms is antiquated. Things are not as they used to be as my 4 single dad friends will tell you. I will admit that if you live in the south, the attitude may be different then say in California. I should also mention that ALL of the children of the single dad's I know have the father's last name including the ones conceived out of wed-lock. A very MEANINGFUL thing if the situation should have to be settled in court.
 
Yeah alot of things to consider. I'm 25 and she is 26 and has kids already, which is why I think she's open to me having custody. As far as being able to attend a school close by there are 4 relatively close...3 in Kentucky alone to choose from.....well applying to medical school isn't all about choices lol. But that is a ways off. But I have two choices for tonite....shred a sixer of coronas or hit and kick my heavy bag....i'm opting for the bag workout. Talk to you all later...Peace.
 
well it's over...sadly she miscarried. doesn't seem to bother her as much as I thought it would. I guess I always thought it was a really big deal. Anyhow we are still friends, no we aren't going to be sleeping with each other again.
 
Originally posted by JCPhelps
well it's over...sadly she miscarried. doesn't seem to bother her as much as I thought it would. I guess I always thought it was a really big deal. Anyhow we are still friends, no we aren't going to be sleeping with each other again.

Sorry to hear that, JCP.

I guess it depends on the woman - I know if I had a miscarriage I'd be devastated - but whether or not it's a "planned" pregnancy might have some effect on that as well. Perhaps now she just feels relieved.

Cheesy as it sounds, things always do work out for the best, eh.
 
Free free at last! Next time use a rubber
 
Originally posted by johnstoner
Free free at last! Next time use a rubber

If this is a joke, it is in abominable taste. I sincerely hope you re-evaluate your compassion towards other people before you begin medical school.

JC, I'm so sorry to hear this news. What an emotional turbulence for the both of you right now. 🙁
 
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