Anyone out there regret med school->residency?

[camng11]

I've had regrets becoming a dr since starting med school, and im currently a resident now. I've grown resentful towards my career due to all of the experiences and relationships that Ive missed out on. It's just extremely difficult to quit now with all of the debt and the fact that I just started intern year (3 yr primary care program). The thing that hurts me is that when I speak to patients, I can hear it in my voice my unethusiasm and monotone voice whereas a lot of my coresidents/attendings seem so upbeat and interested in everything in medicine when discussing topics. I think to myself that they might have better care with another provider. The only thing that is giving me hope is that the job security is stable and I can work half the week in the future for 6 figures (despite having lots of debt). My concern is that I'm just not passionate about what I do, there are certain aspects that are interesting(maybe 5-10% of what I do) but the rest are not. I hear the unethusiasm in my voice everyday, and it transitions with me to my personal life. I can finish residency for sure but I am wondering if there are people out there in the same boat as me or experienced similar things - what did you do etc

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[Journey10]

I use to feel like that before going into medicine. Medicine was a second career for me. I use to absolutely hate the mornings and going to work. Not a good feeling. Trust me your patients and people around you can feel your lack of enthusiasm. I believe you have to love what you do to truly be great at it! I sucked at my first career but I knew it well enough to keep it going.

You need to find a way to do something else. You don't have to leave medicine to do something else - perhaps being in the research or administrative side of medicine might make you happier. Figure out what makes you happy and do it. Life is too short to wake up everyday with a heavy heart.
I hope I was helpful.

 

[anonperson]

I've had regrets becoming a dr since starting med school, and im currently a resident now. I've grown resentful towards my career due to all of the experiences and relationships that Ive missed out on. It's just extremely difficult to quit now with all of the debt and the fact that I just started intern year (3 yr primary care program). The thing that hurts me is that when I speak to patients, I can hear it in my voice my unethusiasm and monotone voice whereas a lot of my coresidents/attendings seem so upbeat and interested in everything in medicine when discussing topics. I think to myself that they might have better care with another provider. The only thing that is giving me hope is that the job security is stable and I can work half the week in the future for 6 figures (despite having lots of debt). My concern is that I'm just not passionate about what I do, there are certain aspects that are interesting(maybe 5-10% of what I do) but the rest are not. I hear the unethusiasm in my voice everyday, and it transitions with me to my personal life. I can finish residency for sure but I am wondering if there are people out there in the same boat as me or experienced similar things - what did you do etc

What did you miss out on?

Sure you will miss out on certain experiences compared to other professions but it isn't unique to medicine. I can think of several other professions that are demanding.

Most people lead relatively fulfilling lives during this process (get married, have kids, take trips, etc).

Medical school is generally unpleasant for a variety of reason. Residency is meant to be unpleasant even if you love your specialty. Your quality of life should improve after completing residency. I know mines did as did a lot of my friends.

Passion is kind of overrated. This is a job. If you absolutely hate it, then go do something else but medicine is not a bad gig.

Do I love my profession? No. But I would be that way about any job to be honest. I am ~3 years out of fellowship and have noticed the following: the better I get at my profession (clinically and technically), the easier it is and the more enjoyable it is. I am nowhere close to being a 'master' but am steadily improving.

 

[shaggybill]

OP, sounds like you are experiencing burnout. I was in the same boat as you later in my intern year and through most of 2nd year. I ignored it. I thought my lack of enthusiasm was due to not liking medicine anymore. I made a grave mistake of not seeking help from faculty and mentors, and instead fixated on my interest in business and started looking for ways out of medicine. There was, unfortunately, some low hanging fruit that convinced me to resign from my position in residency and start a new career outside of medicine. A tremendous weight lifted off my shoulders after leaving, but it didn't last more than a year. While I enjoyed the business world, I started to miss a little bit of medicine. At first I missed treating just a few procedures here and there, which turned into missing treating this disease and that disease, and before long I was pulling out my old medical books because it would bother me that I couldn't remember how to treat whatever random disease that popped into my head, and then I started reading these same books just for fun. Through happenstance, I reconnected with some of my previous faculty on a hiking trip with a mutual friend and when they asked me out of the blue if I would ever consider coming back to medicine, I knew what the answer was. Trust me, there's nothing so heartbreaking as suddenly realizing that you were *this* close to finishing something you've worked a decade plus towards and you walked away from it. I still have an interest in business, but having that year away from medicine and reflecting on it now, I know that my interest in medicine is greater and I have a new understanding that business and medicine don't have to be mutually exclusive. I am actively trying to get back into residency now, but in a slightly different specialty.

The best advice you will ever receive is to finish your residency. You don't have to love it right now, just show up and do the work and make sure your patients are getting good medical care. There are so many clinical and non-clinical opportunities for board certified docs that pay very well and don't necessarily require patient contact. Yes, you can get a medical license in most states after completing intern year and legally work as a physician, but trust me, the jobs are few and far between - even worse if you are looking for stability and benefits. Everybody wants BC docs, as most insurance will require it and employers have a hard time trusting any doc without it. Even if you don't work as a doctor after finishing, having BC physician on your resume will be invaluable and it shows you follow through.

Lastly, seek help for burnout. I would have denied up and down that I was going through burnout. I was convinced that I just didn't like medicine. I was 100% wrong. I'm paying for it now, literally and figuratively. I am fortunate in that I am working as concierge doc now, but if this clinic were to ever go under or I get fired, I'd be up the creek because I got unbelievably lucky landing this job - right place right time. It won't happen again. So finish the residency. You will not regret it, I promise.

 

[camng11]

What did you miss out on?

Sure you will miss out on certain experiences compared to other professions but it isn't unique to medicine. I can think of several other professions that are demanding.

Most people lead relatively fulfilling lives during this process (get married, have kids, take trips, etc).

Medical school is generally unpleasant for a variety of reason. Residency is meant to be unpleasant even if you love your specialty. Your quality of life should improve after completing residency. I know mines did as did a lot of my friends.

Passion is kind of overrated. This is a job. If you absolutely hate it, then go do something else but medicine is not a bad gig.

Do I love my profession? No. But I would be that way about any job to be honest. I am ~3 years out of fellowship and have noticed the following: the better I get at my profession (clinically and technically), the easier it is and the more enjoyable it is. I am nowhere close to being a 'master' but am steadily improving.

I think that resonates with me well, that the easier your job is the more enjoyable it is. I am juggling learning things, and how to transition into a dr which is contributing to my stress levels. I agree completely that it is just a job, that is what I've been telling myself. I just don't know how or when I can spark that enthusiasm in my voice again during my premed years.

OP, sounds like you are experiencing burnout. I was in the same boat as you later in my intern year and through most of 2nd year. I ignored it. I thought my lack of enthusiasm was due to not liking medicine anymore. I made a grave mistake of not seeking help from faculty and mentors, and instead fixated on my interest in business and started looking for ways out of medicine. There was, unfortunately, some low hanging fruit that convinced me to resign from my position in residency and start a new career outside of medicine. A tremendous weight lifted off my shoulders after leaving, but it didn't last more than a year. While I enjoyed the business world, I started to miss a little bit of medicine. At first I missed treating just a few procedures here and there, which turned into missing treating this disease and that disease, and before long I was pulling out my old medical books because it would bother me that I couldn't remember how to treat whatever random disease that popped into my head, and then I started reading these same books just for fun. Through happenstance, I reconnected with some of my previous faculty on a hiking trip with a mutual friend and when they asked me out of the blue if I would ever consider coming back to medicine, I knew what the answer was. Trust me, there's nothing so heartbreaking as suddenly realizing that you were *this* close to finishing something you've worked a decade plus towards and you walked away from it. I still have an interest in business, but having that year away from medicine and reflecting on it now, I know that my interest in medicine is greater and I have a new understanding that business and medicine don't have to be mutually exclusive. I am actively trying to get back into residency now, but in a slightly different specialty.

The best advice you will ever receive is to finish your residency. You don't have to love it right now, just show up and do the work and make sure your patients are getting good medical care. There are so many clinical and non-clinical opportunities for board certified docs that pay very well and don't necessarily require patient contact. Yes, you can get a medical license in most states after completing intern year and legally work as a physician, but trust me, the jobs are few and far between - even worse if you are looking for stability and benefits. Everybody wants BC docs, as most insurance will require it and employers have a hard time trusting any doc without it. Even if you don't work as a doctor after finishing, having BC physician on your resume will be invaluable and it shows you follow through.

Lastly, seek help for burnout. I would have denied up and down that I was going through burnout. I was convinced that I just didn't like medicine. I was 100% wrong. I'm paying for it now, literally and figuratively. I am fortunate in that I am working as concierge doc now, but if this clinic were to ever go under or I get fired, I'd be up the creek because I got unbelievably lucky landing this job - right place right time. It won't happen again. So finish the residency. You will not regret it, I promise.

I agree that I am burntout, I have always been stubborn in seeking help for this type of issue. I know the value of becoming bc, that's why I hope that when Im done with residency I have the option of working half days a week while still getting good income. I will finish residency, but again I hope to find enthusiasm somehow in my work which has been difficult for me.

 

[deleted367183]

I feel like everyone hates residency. It's like middle school that way. Our attendings openly talk about how much residency sucked, and that's in pathology, never mind IM.

 

[Dave1980]

I've had regrets becoming a dr since starting med school, and im currently a resident now. I've grown resentful towards my career due to all of the experiences and relationships that Ive missed out on. It's just extremely difficult to quit now with all of the debt and the fact that I just started intern year (3 yr primary care program). The thing that hurts me is that when I speak to patients, I can hear it in my voice my unethusiasm and monotone voice whereas a lot of my coresidents/attendings seem so upbeat and interested in everything in medicine when discussing topics. I think to myself that they might have better care with another provider. The only thing that is giving me hope is that the job security is stable and I can work half the week in the future for 6 figures (despite having lots of debt). My concern is that I'm just not passionate about what I do, there are certain aspects that are interesting(maybe 5-10% of what I do) but the rest are not. I hear the unethusiasm in my voice everyday, and it transitions with me to my personal life. I can finish residency for sure but I am wondering if there are people out there in the same boat as me or experienced similar things - what did you do etc

Sorry to burst your bubble but you won't be able to find a job working part time in primary care making 6 figures. Treat your job like a job and find enjoyment outside of medicine is my advice.

 

[deleted480308]

I've had regrets becoming a dr since starting med school, and im currently a resident now. I've grown resentful towards my career due to all of the experiences and relationships that Ive missed out on. It's just extremely difficult to quit now with all of the debt and the fact that I just started intern year (3 yr primary care program). The thing that hurts me is that when I speak to patients, I can hear it in my voice my unethusiasm and monotone voice whereas a lot of my coresidents/attendings seem so upbeat and interested in everything in medicine when discussing topics. I think to myself that they might have better care with another provider. The only thing that is giving me hope is that the job security is stable and I can work half the week in the future for 6 figures (despite having lots of debt). My concern is that I'm just not passionate about what I do, there are certain aspects that are interesting(maybe 5-10% of what I do) but the rest are not. I hear the unethusiasm in my voice everyday, and it transitions with me to my personal life. I can finish residency for sure but I am wondering if there are people out there in the same boat as me or experienced similar things - what did you do etc

“Passion” is overrated. Jobs are trading time for money.

 

[smq123]

Sorry to burst your bubble but you won't be able to find a job working part time in primary care making 6 figures. Treat your job like a job and find enjoyment outside of medicine is my advice.

Actually, it's not that unheard of. I work 3 days a week in family medicine (straight primary care; I don't do nursing home or anything else) and I make low six figures a year.

The only problem I have with "finding enjoyment outside of medicine" is that it lowers my tolerance of BS when I am at work. But as things go, it's not the heaviest burden.

 

[sloh]

Check out this thread:

Working 2 days per week

Working 2 days per week

What specialties can mantain a private practice by working 2 days per week? I would gladly sacrifice half of my income to work 2 days per week. I know a derm that did this. She scheduled patients on Mondays and Wednesdays from 10am to around 4pm. Between her income and her husband's they had...

forums.studentdoctor.net

 

[Dave1980]

Actually, it's not that unheard of. I work 3 days a week in family medicine (straight primary care; I don't do nursing home or anything else) and I make low six figures a year.

The only problem I have with "finding enjoyment outside of medicine" is that it lowers my tolerance of BS when I am at work. But as things go, it's not the heaviest burden.

Is your take home pay after taxes, benefits, and retirement 6 figures?

 

[smq123]

Is your take home pay after taxes, benefits, and retirement 6 figures?

No. But I also work at a community health center, where salaries are notoriously lower than they would be in private practice. My FM friends who work part time in private practice make quite a bit more per year and, based on typical calculations, probably do break 6 figures even after taxes.

 

[PainRehabMD]

No. But I also work at a community health center, where salaries are notoriously lower than they would be in private practice. My FM friends who work part time in private practice make quite a bit more per year and, based on typical calculations, probably do break 6 figures even after taxes.

Just to add to this, several years ago, my friends in FM were getting outpatient jobs offering mid 200k's for 4 to 4 1/2 day weeks, so I don't see why it's not possible to make 100k+ working part time. These were in major metro areas (but not NY or Socal) or mid-sized cities.

 

[Dave1980]

What job even offers 3 days a week except urgent care? Most PP wouldn't take someone right out of training for 3 days a week.

 

[Candidate2017]

There are tons of things that suck about med school and training, which makes it an easy target to scapegoat and resent for whatever is unfulfilled in your personal life. You just have to make time to pursue personally fulfilling things. That can be difficult as an intern.

I wouldn't necessarily say you are burned out. I would say you're a first year resident making peanuts, on a steep learning curve, working lots of hours, with huge responsibilities but little authority, subject to the bureaucracies of the medical system, and completely subordinate for the next 2.5 years in an apprenticeship model where anyone and everyone has the power to revoke everything you've worked for. So yeah, it's going to be somewhat hard for most people to be enthusiastic about that.

 

[smq123]

What job even offers 3 days a week except urgent care? Most PP wouldn't take someone right out of training for 3 days a week.

Eh, you'd be surprised. Some people job share. Some practices are opening new offices and only need someone there a few days a week, at least for now. Some other offices have spikes in activity, so they need another person there on those days, but not on other days. (In our office, Monday, Thursday, and Fridays are reliably s***shows.) I received a job recruiter email for a specialty practice that wanted a primary care physician there a few days a week. Concierge or DPC practices may only need someone physically there a few days a week - basically to baby sit the office. There's a variety of reasons. Most people don't want to do part time immediately out of residency, but I do know of a few people who have (mostly because they had kids at the tail end of residency).

Honestly, if they're smart, most jobs will offer a variety of scheduling options. The more flexibility you offer, the more likely you are to attract and retain healthcare providers. As you probably know, recruiting takes a lot of money, so the more you can retain people, the more money you save.

Anyway, to bring it back to the OP - yes, primary care does offer quite a bit of flexibility that other specialties might not. HOWEVER, you still have to make sure that you like it. Doing something you dislike 3 days a week is still going to suck.

 

[VA Hopeful Dr]

Is your take home pay after taxes, benefits, and retirement 6 figures?

Yes. This year I'll make just shy of 300k 4.5 days/week outpatient FM. The only way I won't net 6 figures is if taxes/benefits/retirement take 2/3rds of my income and that's just not possible at my job given the retirement setup.

 

[Dave1980]

OP, just wanna say there is nothing worse than a career that feels like a waste of your time. I left the easiest, fewest hours, high pay, high benefits career that I was already a made man in. But I started hating it, cause it felt like a waste of my time. Days are nothing--good and bad. Years though, it's feeling like you're gonna waste the next 20 years of your life that really kills you. What would you do instead? Which would be 20 years better spent?

What career did you leave?!?!?

 

[j4pac]

If work defines your levels of happiness as a person...It’s going to be a long road. Find the good in the job, and appreciate that you have opportunities that the significant percentage of people in this world don’t have.

 

[emergentmd]

There is a reason people call it work. All of the rainbow, unicorn talk about medicine being a calling is crap 99% of the time. Tell most doc that they will get a decent salary of 80K/yr and very few docs would do this as their calling.

Suck it up, finish residency, then you have options when you are done. If you quit now, the loans will limit your options/happiness.

You will regret quitting.

Put it another way. I would really hate and find little joy from being a house painter. But if someone paid me my current 500K salary, I would be very satisfied being a painter working 40 hrs a wk.

 

[Goro]

I can think of two grads of mine who bailed on Medicine after graduating. One just disappeared off the face of the Earth, and the other didn't like being told what to do.

 

[mja75]

Hang in there my friend. Medical school and residency are very taxing on the mind and spirit. Your difficulties seem insurmountable now but one day you'll tell yourself "I'm glad I stuck with it." It will pay off big time.

Take care of yourself, above all. Get enough sleep and do plenty of exercise to keep your body in shape. When you become an attending, a whole new marvelous world will open up that you cannot see right now.

 

[cookiegrub]

I can think of two grads of mine who bailed on Medicine after graduating. One just disappeared off the face of the Earth, and the other didn't like being told what to do.

to be fair though, some schools (specifically DO) don't really know how to guide students. From a student's perspective, it can be frustrating if the school "tries to help" but really just provides solutions that will lead the student nowhere or in the wrong direction. I do not think in many matters, especially when the student is nearing graduation, the student is the school's priority as long as they don't impose any risk to them. It's very disturbing but that's why higher education should be treated differently from grade school because no one cares about your future once you graduate.

 

[0ncogene]

There is a reason people call it work. All of the rainbow, unicorn talk about medicine being a calling is crap 99% of the time. Tell most doc that they will get a decent salary of 80K/yr and very few docs would do this as their calling.

Suck it up, finish residency, then you have options when you are done. If you quit now, the loans will limit your options/happiness.

You will regret quitting.

Put it another way. I would really hate and find little joy from being a house painter. But if someone paid me my current 500K salary, I would be very satisfied being a painter working 40 hrs a wk.

Couldn't agree more.

 

[j4pac]

There is a reason people call it work. All of the rainbow, unicorn talk about medicine being a calling is crap 99% of the time. Tell most doc that they will get a decent salary of 80K/yr and very few docs would do this as their calling.

Suck it up, finish residency, then you have options when you are done. If you quit now, the loans will limit your options/happiness.

You will regret quitting.

Put it another way. I would really hate and find little joy from being a house painter. But if someone paid me my current 500K salary, I would be very satisfied being a painter working 40 hrs a wk.

Painter for $500k or medicine for $500k? Id be interest in that being a forum poll question

 

[Giovanotto]

Residency is the worst. Way worse than medical school, that's all I gotta say. Having to deal with "seniors". Barf.

 

[aafisahar]

Painter for $500k or medicine for $500k? Id be interest in that being a forum poll question

People whining about residency would get wrecked as a painter. You can work similar hours and it's tough ****ing work. Not tough like "my senior yelled at me because I did the med rec wrong" but tough like physical labor in 90 degree rooms for 12 hours a day. Guaranteed us soft as a grape white collar workers wouldn't last 5 years as a painter, even if it pays 500k.

 

[BorntobeDO?]

Residency is the worst. Way worse than medical school, that's all I gotta say. Having to deal with "seniors". Barf.

Sounds like someone has a case of the ‘mondays,’ better slow that unprofessionalism down homie before you find intern year extended. /s
J/king I totally know what you mean. The more my seniors micromanage the more I hate wards.

 

[gutonc]

Sounds like someone has a case of the ‘mondays,’ better slow that unprofessionalism down homie before you find intern year extended. /s
J/king I totally know what you mean. The more my seniors micromanage the more I hate wards.

The worst senior resident experience I had as an intern was with a guy who was actually a really strong resident but just couldn’t let go.

Post call in the ICU (back in the 30 hour call days), rough night with lots of sick folks, several admits, 2 or 3 codes and 1 death Trying to get notes finished after rounding and my senior sits down and says, “let me help you write notes so you can get out of here”. So I say, “sure, why don’t you do Mr. Smith’s note”.
30 seconds later, “so what do you want to do about his hyponatremia?”, I answer and keep working on my own note.

30 seconds later, “what do you want to do about his hypotension?”’ I answer and keep working.

30 seconds later, “what do you want to do about his renal failure?”. At this point I stopped him and said, “I appreciate the offer to help, but this will actually take me twice as long to finish if you keep doing this. So either do the note yourself or please just go home and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He quietly finished that note, asked if I needed anything else and left. I was out the door in under a 30 minutes having finished 3 more notes and signed out to that day’s team. Granted, it was late I. The year and was my 4th ICU rotation so I had a decent idea what I was doing, and how to get help if I didn’t.

 

[Giovanotto]

The worst senior resident experience I had as an intern was with a guy who was actually a really strong resident but just couldn’t let go.

Post call in the ICU (back in the 30 hour call days), rough night with lots of sick folks, several admits, 2 or 3 codes and 1 death Trying to get notes finished after rounding and my senior sits down and says, “let me help you write notes so you can get out of here”. So I say, “sure, why don’t you do Mr. Smith’s note”.
30 seconds later, “so what do you want to do about his hyponatremia?”, I answer and keep working on my own note.

30 seconds later, “what do you want to do about his hypotension?”’ I answer and keep working.

30 seconds later, “what do you want to do about his renal failure?”. At this point I stopped him and said, “I appreciate the offer to help, but this will actually take me twice as long to finish if you keep doing this. So either do the note yourself or please just go home and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He quietly finished that note, asked if I needed anything else and left. I was out the door in under a 30 minutes having finished 3 more notes and signed out to that day’s team. Granted, it was late I. The year and was my 4th ICU rotation so I had a decent idea what I was doing, and how to get help if I didn’t.

This is literally half my seniors. I'm not sure how they still romanticize medicine this much. Slow day, lots of downtime? My ears are all yours. Busy day, working 13 hours, lets just stay silent, do the work, and gtfo. What really gets me from 0-100 is people socializing during sign out or asking things about the patient that are 100000% irrelevant.

 

[VA Hopeful Dr]

This is literally half my seniors. I'm not sure how they still romanticize medicine this much. Slow day, lots of downtime? My ears are all yours. Busy day, working 13 hours, lets just stay silent, do the work, and gtfo. What really gets me from 0-100 is people socializing during sign out or asking things about the patient that are 100000% irrelevant.

People are social animals.

My program was small and closer than most, so we all did a bit of socializing during sign outs. Didn't seem to upset anyone, and if someone was in a hurry they'd say so and we'd stick to business.

 

[SLC]

Is your take home pay after taxes, benefits, and retirement 6 figures?

My partner works part time (8:30 - 11:30 5 days per week) and makes about $110k after tax and benefits.

 

[SLC]

People whining about residency would get wrecked as a painter. You can work similar hours and it's tough ****ing work. Not tough like "my senior yelled at me because I did the med rec wrong" but tough like physical labor in 90 degree rooms for 12 hours a day. Guaranteed us soft as a grape white collar workers wouldn't last 5 years as a painter, even if it pays 500k.

people whining about Residency would get “tired” as a painter, I’ll grant you that. It’s far more physically demanding. But painting is way less emotionally taxing, way less damaging to personal relationships, way less liability, and infinitely cheaper to get started doing. It also doesn’t take your entire young adult years away from you just to learn how to do it. And if you don’t learn to paint adequately, nobody dies.

I’d be a painter for $500k every day of the week, and I’d enjoy it. But I’ve worked as a construction finisher before (paint, tile, carpet, flooring, drywall, finish plumbing etc). I enjoyed going into a site alone, turning up the music, and getting to work

I love medicine, and am thrilled to be doing it. But it’s not like painting/finish work broke my spirit the way that residency almost did.

even now, 3yrs after I left residency, I’m finding that my kids sort of resent me. And that really hurts.

I gave most of my 20’s and 30’s to pursuing medicine. I’m 39 and only 3 years into this career. And while I have a kick ass job now that I’m totally satisfied with, I’m also acutely aware of what it cost my family and I to get to this point.

I’d be lying if I said I don’t have regular periods where I question if it was all worth it. I think my wife and kids do too.

 

[SLC]

I want to be clear, I’m glad to do what I do. And my wife will tell anyone that we went through what we did so that I can do something I love, and I absolutely do love my career. But it definitely came at a cost. And knowing what I know now, if I had it all to do over again, I might not pursue medicine a 2nd time.

I’m not sure what else I’d do; but I’d think long and hard before setting out on my way toward becoming a physician if I were given the opportunity to start over again.

The way I see it now, I was given a huge opportunity. It came through sacrifice on the part of my entire family. Now that I’m here, I’ve got the rest of my life to pay it back to them. The nice thing is, I can spend the rest of my life trying to do so. The salary makes having some cool and unique experiences together a lot easier than it would have been otherwise. I’ll take my daughter to Europe for a graduation gift next year, for example. Her name came from an experience I had there in my late teens/early 20’s, and she’s wanted to go to that specific place in Europe since she was very small.

But if I hadn’t been in school/training for the first 14 years of my kids lives, there could have been a lot of experiences that could/would have been had, and I’ll never get that time back, and that makes me sad.

But I’m sure there are lots of folks who didn’t pursue medicine, but still have regrets so maybe it’s not purely a medicine thing. Maybe I’m in my midlife crisis or something.

 

[VA Hopeful Dr]

I want to be clear, I’m glad to do what I do. And my wife will tell anyone that we went through what we did so that I can do something I love, and I absolutely do love my career. But it definitely came at a cost. And knowing what I know now, if I had it all to do over again, I might not pursue medicine a 2nd time.

I’m not sure what else I’d do; but I’d think long and hard before setting out on my way toward becoming a physician if I were given the opportunity to start over again.

The way I see it now, I was given a huge opportunity. It came through sacrifice on the part of my entire family. Now that I’m here, I’ve got the rest of my life to pay it back to them. The nice thing is, I can spend the rest of my life trying to do so. The salary makes having some cool and unique experiences together a lot easier than it would have been otherwise. I’ll take my daughter to Europe for a graduation gift next year, for example. Her name came from an experience I had there in my late teens/early 20’s, and she’s wanted to go to that specific place in Europe since she was very small.

But if I hadn’t been in school/training for the first 14 years of my kids lives, there could have been a lot of experiences that could/would have been had, and I’ll never get that time back, and that makes me sad.

But I’m sure there are lots of folks who didn’t pursue medicine, but still have regrets so maybe it’s not purely a medicine thing. Maybe I’m in my midlife crisis or something.

I can definitely see this being hard on kids when they're older, but they're resilient and especially as they get older and do their own career things they're much more likely to look back and understand compared to now. Teenagers and younger, even great ones, are fairly self-centered after all.

Don't think its a mid life crisis yet. For doctors that usually takes the form of an airplane.

 

[Giovanotto]

I want to be clear, I’m glad to do what I do. And my wife will tell anyone that we went through what we did so that I can do something I love, and I absolutely do love my career. But it definitely came at a cost. And knowing what I know now, if I had it all to do over again, I might not pursue medicine a 2nd time.

I’m not sure what else I’d do; but I’d think long and hard before setting out on my way toward becoming a physician if I were given the opportunity to start over again.

The way I see it now, I was given a huge opportunity. It came through sacrifice on the part of my entire family. Now that I’m here, I’ve got the rest of my life to pay it back to them. The nice thing is, I can spend the rest of my life trying to do so. The salary makes having some cool and unique experiences together a lot easier than it would have been otherwise. I’ll take my daughter to Europe for a graduation gift next year, for example. Her name came from an experience I had there in my late teens/early 20’s, and she’s wanted to go to that specific place in Europe since she was very small.

But if I hadn’t been in school/training for the first 14 years of my kids lives, there could have been a lot of experiences that could/would have been had, and I’ll never get that time back, and that makes me sad.

But I’m sure there are lots of folks who didn’t pursue medicine, but still have regrets so maybe it’s not purely a medicine thing. Maybe I’m in my midlife crisis or something.

Its very interesting hearing your perspective through it all as a father. I have yet to settle down, and wonder what form my regret will take. Obviously, my parents sacrificed a crap ton to make this happen, and my biggest fear is not having enough time to pay it back (they are quite old, as far as parents go).

 

[shaggybill]

For doctors that usually takes the form of an airplane

Cirrus vs Bonanza...I'm hoping that's my 40 year old mid-life crisis predicament.

 

[Splenda88]

My partner works part time (8:30 - 11:30 5 days per week) and makes about $110k after tax and benefits.

I she a doc? That's a very nice gig

 

[Splenda88]

But I’m sure there are lots of folks who didn’t pursue medicine, but still have regrets so maybe it’s not purely a medicine thing. Maybe I’m in my midlife crisis or something.

Yes you are... Shower your family with expensive things and they will be ok... Kidding aside, kids are more resilient than most Americans give them credit for. First world problem that you did not make it to 3-5 soccer games for your kids. You have a unicorn job making 300k+/yr... Shut u... and take the money!

 

[SLC]

I she a doc? That's a very nice gig

yes (it’s my office partner) so she’s a family doc

 

[SLC]

Yes you are... Shower your family with expensive things and they will be ok... Kidding aside, kids are more resilient than most Americans give them credit for. First world problem that you did not make it to 3-5 soccer games for your kids. You have a unicorn job making 300k+/yr... Shut u... and take the money!

Meh, it’s less about showering them with expensive things, and more about allowing them to do things they couldn’t when I was in training. My wife has started up her own business for example. We were able to invest in getting that up and running with some of my income. During these past few months she’s making about half what I do every month, byselling things online. She’s very much enjoying herself doing it.

My kids are doing sports that we couldn’t afford before (mountain biking is expensive). We take trips together, etc.

 

[BorntobeDO?]

I want to be clear, I’m glad to do what I do. And my wife will tell anyone that we went through what we did so that I can do something I love, and I absolutely do love my career. But it definitely came at a cost. And knowing what I know now, if I had it all to do over again, I might not pursue medicine a 2nd time.

I’m not sure what else I’d do; but I’d think long and hard before setting out on my way toward becoming a physician if I were given the opportunity to start over again.

The way I see it now, I was given a huge opportunity. It came through sacrifice on the part of my entire family. Now that I’m here, I’ve got the rest of my life to pay it back to them. The nice thing is, I can spend the rest of my life trying to do so. The salary makes having some cool and unique experiences together a lot easier than it would have been otherwise. I’ll take my daughter to Europe for a graduation gift next year, for example. Her name came from an experience I had there in my late teens/early 20’s, and she’s wanted to go to that specific place in Europe since she was very small.

But if I hadn’t been in school/training for the first 14 years of my kids lives, there could have been a lot of experiences that could/would have been had, and I’ll never get that time back, and that makes me sad.

But I’m sure there are lots of folks who didn’t pursue medicine, but still have regrets so maybe it’s not purely a medicine thing. Maybe I’m in my midlife crisis or something.

Feeling this right now. My kiddos are pretty young, but already my oldest knows when I am on inpatient and doesn’t want me to be.

 

[rokshana]

Feeling this right now. My kiddos are pretty young, but already my oldest knows when I am on inpatient and doesn’t want me to be.

My sister is a school psychologist and her kids dont want her to go to work either...it’s not limited to medicine.

And as a daughter of a surgeon, my dad wasn’t so present when we were young...he was a resident and then solo practice...but got to spend a lot of time with him as an adult...and my whining about my residency problems was a never ending source of amusement to him...ultimately a bond that brought us closer together...your children will be fine.

 

[hallowmann]

Feeling this right now. My kiddos are pretty young, but already my oldest knows when I am on inpatient and doesn’t want me to be.

This a ultimately what any kids would be like when a parent goes away to work. It's normal. They miss you just like you miss them. They will be fine though. I'm lucky to have a very understanding and reasonable spouse, who just explains to them that I need to go to work, and that if I could choose I would be with them all the time.

It gets a bit easier for them when they're a bit older. It never feels good on your side though. Just make sure that when you are home, you're actually there, listening to them giving them your attention, and spending time with them. I might not be able to read to my kids every night in bed, but when I'm home it's me giving them a bath, getting them ready for bed and reading to them.

 

[AMEHigh]

Is your take home pay after taxes, benefits, and retirement 6 figures?

I work part time and make well in to the 6 figures and I’m FM. I see patients 3 days a week (7 hour days) and have 1 day for admin. Yes my take home pay after those things are deducted is still 6 figures.

OP, yes residency sucks. I hope that things improve after you finish, but if you’re IM trained hopefully you can find something that suits your needs.

 

[Splenda88]

I work part time and make well in to the 6 figures and I’m FM. I see patients 3 days a week (7 hour days) and have 1 day for admin. Yes my take home pay after those things are deducted is still 6 figures.

OP, yes residency sucks. I hope that things improve after you finish, but if you’re IM trained hopefully you can find something that suits your needs.

This is a unicorn a job... Great catch!

 

[SLC]

This is a unicorn a job... Great catch!

Not really, I think I could fairly easily make 150-160k doing 2.5 days or 5 half days at my current job. And while I make a good living, my per wRVU rate is on the low end.

it’s all about knowing how to be productive, and being a good doc that’s personable so people keep coming back. Also, not being afraid of procedures.

 

[Splenda88]

Not really, I think I could fairly easily make 150-160k doing 2.5 days or 5 half days at my current job. And while I make a good living, my per wRVU rate is on the low end.

it’s all about knowing how to be productive, and being a good doc that’s personable so people keep coming back. Also, not being afraid of procedures.

Is there a better job than being a physician out there? People can work 20 hrs/wk and still make 150k+... The more I am reading these stories, the more I feel like going into medicine was not such a bad move.

 

[SLC]

Is there a better job than being a physician out there? People can work 20 hrs/wk and still make 150k+... The more I am reading these stories, the more I feel like going into medicine was not such a bad move.

It’s a good gig, but it takes an awful lot of investment in time and up front costs. Not many can/could do it.

I really do think the secret to good pay in primary care is recognizing the value of what you do.
An office partner just sends a 99213 every time. I more than double him up on wRVU’s despite only seeing about 25% more volume

 

[sloh]

It’s a good gig, but it takes an awful lot of investment in time and up front costs. Not many can/could do it.

I really do think the secret to good pay in primary care is recognizing the value of what you do.
An office partner just sends a 99213 every time. I more than double him up on wRVU’s despite only seeing about 25% more volume

Helps a lot to know your worth, get a job that pays you fairly based off productivity, and get familiar with billing and coding. For a number of specialties, high compensation/hr is achieved through high volume (which allows you to decrease the hours you work). The trick is figuring out what niche in your specialty allows you to capitalize on that or finding ways to be very efficient.