Commitment conundrum

[Doctorbob1485]

I have my top two programs that are both very strong and almost equal and about a week and a half ago I had thought my mind had been made up and I sent my number 1 an email saying they were such. About two days ago after talking with family, location became a little bit more important for me and my number two is now my number 1. I called my new #1 and left a message saying they are my number 1 after a previous email that said they were "very high on my list". My worry is should I email my previous number 1 saying they have come down to my #2 due to family reason or just leave t alone. I'm just worried if the two PDs wind up talking to each other about their rank lists. If anyone could help me out I would appreciate it

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[rokshana]

you are over thinking this…PDs don't really care that much about, no doubt, the plethora of "you're my number 1" and " I really, really, really want to be in your program" emails and it really has no effect on how they are ranking you…let it go…

and the difference between # 1 and #2 is really not that significant, unless you are ABSOLUTELY sure you won't go further than 1…but then you wouldn't rank anything else if you were THAT sure...

 

[mcl]

you are over thinking this…PDs don't really care that much about, no doubt, the plethora of "you're my number 1" and " I really, really, really want to be in your program" emails and it really has no effect on how they are ranking you…let it go…

and the difference between # 1 and #2 is really not that significant, unless you are ABSOLUTELY sure you won't go further than 1…but then you wouldn't rank anything else if you were THAT sure...

Agreed. A "you're my #1" email is NOT in any way a binding commitment. Circumstances change. Priorities change. It's your life and you should rank the programs in the order of your preference on the day the ROLs are finalized. If you end up at your now-#2 program, the PD will never know it wasn't #1, and that's a good thing. If you end up at your new #1, the other PD will say "huh" and move on when your name doesn't appear on the list of matched applicants. If you end up somewhere further down your list, you'll know that #1 emails aren't really a deciding factor when program submit their ROLs.

Sometimes programs send an interview experience questionnaire to candidates that would have matched at that program if they had ranked it first. If you receive such a questionnaire from your former-#1 program, you can honestly say that it was a difficult decision but in the end family considerations had to take precedence.

 

[Doctorbob1485]

Agreed. A "you're my #1" email is NOT in any way a binding commitment. Circumstances change. Priorities change. It's your life and you should rank the programs in the order of your preference on the day the ROLs are finalized. If you end up at your now-#2 program, the PD will never know it wasn't #1, and that's a good thing. If you end up at your new #1, the other PD will say "huh" and move on when your name doesn't appear on the list of matched applicants. If you end up somewhere further down your list, you'll know that #1 emails aren't really a deciding factor when program submit their ROLs.

Sometimes programs send an interview experience questionnaire to candidates that would have matched at that program if they had ranked it first. If you receive such a questionnaire from your former-#1 program, you can honestly say that it was a difficult decision but in the end family considerations had to take precedence.

Thanks yea I was just going to leave it be but this whole processes has stressed me out and has me thinking the littlest thing is going to kill my chances

 

[Smurfette]

Moving to ERAS/Match forum.