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[PaulAtreides2122]

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[Mr.Smile12]

Where does your SO want you to be vs. would your SO appreciate being over 120K less in debt?

 

[PaulAtreides2122]

Where does your SO want you to be vs. would your SO appreciate being over 120K less in debt?

She would rather me be closer to home. We spent the entirety of undergrad doing long distance and all I’ve heard about med school is how important having your support system around you is. On another note, hypothetically If the debt wasn’t a question and the SO was out of the picture, what school do you think would be better for general surgery?

 

[Mr.Smile12]

She would rather me be closer to home. We spent the entirety of undergrad doing long distance and all I’ve heard about med school is how important having your support system around you is. On another note, If the debt wasn’t a question and the SO was out of the picture, what school do you think would be better for general surgery?

Honestly, that's not realistic for your relationship or situation. If the SO isn't that significant, you could entertain that question about which would be better for a career in surgery. But if you have to plan a wedding, joint bank accounts and insurance, taxes, the other person's career, potential children and parent care, then geography matters a lot. This isn't an academic question where you can easily isolate one factor and determine an answer.'

This will not change when you have to choose a residency. Watch and learn


If she wants you to be closer to home, would the 120K debt be a long-term savings when it comes to housing, wedding/marriage, taxes, moving, travel, HER career, or other life expenses of living together? I would hate to also ask, what if living with each other (which you say you both haven't done) doesn't work out? You willing to put a ring on it and set a date? That could ultimately change your financial aid calculations.

 

[PaulAtreides2122]

Honestly, that's not realistic for your relationship or situation. If the SO isn't that significant, you could entertain that question about which would be better for a career in surgery. But if you have to plan a wedding, joint bank accounts and insurance, taxes, the other person's career, potential children and parent care, then geography matters a lot. This isn't an academic question where you can easily isolate one factor and determine an answer.'

This will not change when you have to choose a residency. Watch and learn


If she wants you to be closer to home, would the 120K debt be a long-term savings when it comes to housing, wedding/marriage, taxes, moving, travel, HER career, or other life expenses of living together? I would hate to also ask, what if living with each other (which you say you both haven't done) doesn't work out? You willing to put a ring on it and set a date? That could ultimately change your financial aid calculations.

I appreciate your thorough response and agree with most points. I guess the question I was eluding to was if you had any insight about matching general surgery in one program compared to another. That was why I said the hypothetical earlier. I most certainly will not be making a decision in a vacuum based off this one answer but it would be another piece to the puzzle. I should have just asked the question more directly, my apologies.

 

[Mr.Smile12]

I appreciate your thorough response and agree with most points. I guess the question I was eluding to was if you had any insight about matching general surgery in one program compared to another. That was why I said the hypothetical earlier. I most certainly will not be making a decision in a vacuum based off this one answer but it would be another piece to the puzzle. I should have just asked the question more directly, my apologies.

I may not be the best since I am not a PD in surgery. 🙂 That's why I shared the video. It offers advice from someone who advises students on choosing the "right" residency. He makes a very strong point that "reputation" is overrated, but mentoring and finding the right faculty champions as a medical student do. To me, it matters where you want to end up, and if you think you both want to be in Massachusetts, the question is can you get to a surg residency in a desired spot in Massachusetts (or wherever home is) from either program. I would think that if you present a strong profile with surg experiences, either school ought to be good for you. Then it comes to costs and debt.

The video makes a strong point which I perpetuate: your family and support system matter, and their input should not be discounted easily. You will have another decision point in 4-ish years when choosing a residency. Knowing how you and your SO will compromise for each other's professional or family aspirations is a very important conversation (or series of conversations) to have.