Dental school sucks if you're from a poor background

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hajin

hajin

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Current dental student here, advising all of you without family backing to save as much money as you can before you start school. I'm a non-traditional student so I was able to save a good amount. As a result I have a car I paid for and a few other nice things, but...it still sucks being poor.

Here's why...

1. Half of your classmates will be from solidly upper / upper middle class families, and a lot of those with (multiple) family members who are doctors or dentists. They will drive nice cars their parents bought them. They will live in ridiculous houses and private apartments that their parents cover the rent for or even flat out BOUGHT for them. Some of these people will be, as you might expect, huge douchebags with zero self-awareness, while others will be very nice and mature. But either way, if you grew up in a trailer park, good luck relating to your classmates and their family vacations to Europe. You might have a good deal in common with the average person off the street, but you're not gonna have much in common with a lot of dental students. You can make friends, sure, but it's gonna be an effort.

2. The other 40% will be solidly well-off to middle class, but THINK they're poor af. This group might bother you even more then the clearly rich ones. People who's parents bought them a car will complain about how expensive it is to have a car. People without a car -- but who's parents pay for everything else -- will whine about no car. People with a family safety net choosing to be frugal -- but who COULD spend more and sometimes DO spend more -- will think choosing to be cheap is the same as a forced cheap lifestyle. Basically, you will have to listen to people constantly complain about having no money even though they're getting help or they made the conscious choice not to max their loans (lmao at "choice") Still, if you want to have friends, you're gonna have to listen to a lot of this.

3. Buying loupes and other things not in the budget will stress you out. Nice loupes cost a lot. Some school supplies / test fees aren't in the budget. This is when the "OMG I'm so poor" group will remember their parents. When these situations come around, sometimes you just have to close your eyes and put it on your credit card even though you KNOW it's kind of a ****ty financial decision.

4. Volunteer trips, school trips, some externships, etc. Everyone you hang out with is going on a trip to central America for a week? Well, too bad. You're probably not going unless you've had it in the budget for the last 6 months or are -- again -- willing to just look the other way and put it on a credit card.

5. You will be forced to make poor long term financial decisions out of necessity. Maxing loans and using credit cards you don't immediately pay off is not a good plan. Everybody knows that. But if you want to have money to cover anything not in the budget and not live on ramen 24-7, you will likely have to bite the bullet depending on how expensive your city is. This will put you a little behind out of the gate when you graduate.

6. You will have to choose a dental school based on not only cost of the school, but cost of living where the school is. School loans isn't likely to cover the cost of living in New York / San Francisco unless you live in a cardboard box. I got into UCSF. I was excited. Then I looked up housing costs in San Francisco. Yeah sure, I probably could have made it work if I had wanted it enough and dealt with some weird commute / living situation but... I chose my sanity and went with a school in a more affordable city.

tldr - Almost everybody will have more money than you, even if they think they don't. Save your cash and try to make the best financial decisions you can, even though sometimes circumstances (and a desire to stay sane) will push into some poor ones.

And lastly, if you're lucky enough to have gotten into dental school, everyone is going to think you're rich or at least will be, so... Yeah, it's likely nobody with more permanent financial problems is gonna care about your temporary ones. lol
 
Okay, so I have three kids and I'm used to being pretty broke sometimes. Usually we stay comfortable, but we are going to take an income hit when I start if I am lucky enough to have gotten into a program somewhere. I'm older, have a career, and should be able to do some freelance work on the side to keep us doing well financially. About how much extra time do you have per week for income generating activities?
 
Wait, those mission trips in dental school come out of the students pocket!? Damn I thought the school paid for it with all the tuition the students have to pay
 
oceanicvibe said:
Wait, those mission trips in dental school come out of the students pocket!? Damn I thought the school paid for it with all the tuition the students have to pay
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You're dreaming, wake up! It gets worse when you're about to graduate. Can you believe the school charges you money to send official transcripts to State Boards for licensure application? You're telling me that $400,000 I paid you over the last 4 years doesn't cover the cost to print my transcript and mail it out in a nice stamped envelope?
 
I joined my school’s Facebook group to see who will be attending Welcome Week, and I knew I was going to have a hard time relating to my future classmates when they started replying “oh no, that’s the week of Coachella!” or “I’ll still be in Europe!” :lame:
 
P0W3RL1FT3R said:
I joined my school’s Facebook group to see who will be attending Welcome Week, and I knew I was going to have a hard time relating to my future classmates when they started replying “oh no, that’s the week of Coachella!” or “I’ll still be in Europe!” :lame:
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I can relate that to what you're saying. Went to my school's Welcome Week and many talked about where they were going this summer, like going to Europe and what not. I legit know someone who goes to school in the Northeast and yet basically "lives" in Florida. What I mean by that is, they have been known to take flights from Florida to their school, take an exam, and fly back all in the same day... because why not.
 
Frychicken said:
You're dreaming, wake up! It gets worse when you're about to graduate. Can you believe the school charges you money to send official transcripts to State Boards for licensure application? You're telling me that $400,000 I paid you over the last 4 years doesn't cover the cost to print my transcript and mail it out in a nice stamped envelope?
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You mean the $200 the patient paid for initial exam, prophy, and x-rays does not cover the additional restorative that needs to be done?
 
predental21250 said:
You'll get to their status one day
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milenial.gif


OP, it sounds like you've got some serious first world problems getting you down. I feel for you, bro, I really do. Keep that chin up!

Big Hoss
 
Keeping up with the Jonesses or the more contemporary Kardashians it's not at all what it is cracked up to be.
 
I have to listen to rich kids complain all day about things like "Oh no, I lost my new airpods," and "I got too sunburned in Jamiaca on break," but I guess you all think I'm the snowflake here for thinking that can get old. Maybe that last line, "If you're lucky enough to get into school..." was too subtle.

So in case anybody thinks I'm beside myself with grief... Yeah, I know I have it made in the shade. I get loans to do nothing but go to school. I'm gonna be making more money than I know what to do with before too long. By American standards I'll be set and by international (including landfill kid? wtf lol) standards... well... yeah, I'm probably ALREADY approaching the 1%. It's all relative. I'm aware.

Still, this post wasn't just me throwing a pity party about the horrible horrible hardships I face being in a top dental school in America. It's also meant to be advice to other people out there who come from a poor background.

I'm just saying... If you come from an uneducated, lower class family and you haven't spent a lot of time around people with money, being in dental school may be a bit of a shock to the system. There might be a few people in your same situation, but based on my experience, not all that many. Now, does that MATTER all that much in the long run? Probably not. You've made it. Life will be good.

But in the short term, you should be aware that a few things will be necessarily different if you don't have money like most of your classmates. So try to avoid that by having some reserve for things that aren't in the budget. Also, don't assume things will always be paid for. And, all in all, just be prepared for a little bit of "culture shock" at some people's attitudes about money, life experiences, and spending habits. To quote some sage advice from above, when your friends invite you out for that event you can't really afford, be sure "you do you."
 
Where did you go to undergrad to still end up in dental school with "culture shock" that many others have more luxurious lives than you? You can come from an uneducated lower class family, but you don't go to dental school straight from highschool, and undergrad universities aren't exactly a mecca of poor people.

There's always someone out there who has it better, no need to be jealous. I rather hear my classmates complain about getting sunburned on their cruise than hearing them complain that they don't have enough money to buy groceries.
 
predental21250 said:
Where did you go to undergrad to still end up in dental school with "culture shock" that many others have more luxurious lives than you? You can come from an uneducated lower class family, but you don't go to dental school straight from highschool, and undergrad universities aren't exactly a mecca of poor people.

There's always someone out there who has it better, no need to be jealous. I rather hear my classmates complain about getting sunburned on their cruise than hearing them complain that they don't have enough money to buy groceries.
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I went to a state college. There were plenty of people with money, but also a lot of first generation college students. I guess being friends with a couple people is different than having those people become your main social circle. This post was definitely written for the non-cruise ship crowd.
 
rebecca_chatul_tov said:
Okay, so I have three kids and I'm used to being pretty broke sometimes. Usually we stay comfortable, but we are going to take an income hit when I start if I am lucky enough to have gotten into a program somewhere. I'm older, have a career, and should be able to do some freelance work on the side to keep us doing well financially. About how much extra time do you have per week for income generating activities?
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It's possible to work a little in the first year or two of dental school, but the emphasis is on LITTLE. The didactics will be pretty intense sometimes. I don't know anyone who worked more than a few hours a week (lab jobs at school, weekend hostess etc.) at the start of school. Later in second year depending on the school and when you move into clinic more as a third year, you will definitely have some time though, even if you'll probably need to keep it somewhat flexible and might not feel like working much. For reference, one of my friends is a tutor in the evening and I've worked as an Uber driver. lol
 
rebecca_chatul_tov said:
Okay, so I have three kids and I'm used to being pretty broke sometimes. Usually we stay comfortable, but we are going to take an income hit when I start if I am lucky enough to have gotten into a program somewhere. I'm older, have a career, and should be able to do some freelance work on the side to keep us doing well financially. About how much extra time do you have per week for income generating activities?
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See if you can grab a job on campus like working at the library or monitoring the simlab- you can get paid and still practice preps or study, etc.
 
Saying ‘stop worrying about how others are doing’ is stupid and misses the point. The OP is just saying that being poor in dental school sucks because 1) well, you’re freaking poor, and 2) there are few to no people around you with whom you can relate, which adds a level of stress to the already hectic environment that is dental school.
 
OP, start gunning hard for a competitive specialty and you’ll be too busy to care about what others are doing. Out of sight, out of mind. Put that angst to good use.

Trust me, I don’t come from money. The car I drive is 14 years old. You still have a pretty good life.

Big Hoss
 
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P0W3RL1FT3R said:
I joined my school’s Facebook group to see who will be attending Welcome Week, and I knew I was going to have a hard time relating to my future classmates when they started replying “oh no, that’s the week of Coachella!” or “I’ll still be in Europe!” :lame:
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Say that school's name with pride!
 
schmoob said:
With school AND 3 kids, none.
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I'm really thinking I need to avoid doing anything related to fugitive recovery because I'm getting older and I'm afraid that I could end up messing up my hand or something in a fight, plus by the time you are talking a decent return on time for 10% of their secured bond you are dealing with some people that really don't want to go back to jail. But I want to believe that I would have time to find some work as a process server or maybe picking up a shift here or there as an auxiliary LOE. Is 3-5 hours per week unrealistic?
 
hajin said:
It's possible to work a little in the first year or two of dental school, but the emphasis is on LITTLE. The didactics will be pretty intense sometimes. I don't know anyone who worked more than a few hours a week (lab jobs at school, weekend hostess etc.) at the start of school. Later in second year depending on the school and when you move into clinic more as a third year, you will definitely have some time though, even if you'll probably need to keep it somewhat flexible and might not feel like working much. For reference, one of my friends is a tutor in the evening and I've worked as an Uber driver. lol
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Thanks for the honest answer. There are ways to make a couple hundred dollars in an hour or two, but they do involve having to climb on a roof in a bad part of town or deal with some tweaker. I don't really see myself doing Uber as long as more lucrative, albeit more risky, work is available.
 
rebecca_chatul_tov said:
I'm really thinking I need to avoid doing anything related to fugitive recovery because I'm getting older and I'm afraid that I could end up messing up my hand or something in a fight, plus by the time you are talking a decent return on time for 10% of their secured bond you are dealing with some people that really don't want to go back to jail. But I want to believe that I would have time to find some work as a process server or maybe picking up a shift here or there as an auxiliary LOE. Is 3-5 hours per week unrealistic?
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IMO it's not worth the effort. You'll likely be better served studying, practicing in the lab, decompressing, or spending time with your family.
 
It sucks going to any high profile, high brow school when you are poor, even undergrad (Ivys, Top 20 schools, etc.) as the classes are full of prep and boarding school grads, not public high school scholars. So the talk about the trips to Europe, ski house in Aspen, etc. can begin long before dental school. The truth is dental school has become ultra expensive, and now attracts a more well healed student body. Here is a small example: I went to one of the most expensive schools in the country. As a first year resident, my salary equaled 1/2 of the total of my 4 year tuition. My first job in private practice paid equal to the total of 4 years tuition. Five years out of school I was making 4x the total of 4 years tuition. I do not think that is possible graduating from the same school today.
There were plenty of students from wealthy families in my class. There were also many who were not. I had friends in class, and lot's of outside friends who were not in D school. Focus on doing well in class and not what other people have. That is a hard game to win anyway. There is always someone with more.
 
The one that irks me the most are the “mission” trips to costa rico. It’s like role-playing a good person while taking a vacation.

And then they rub their medical tourism in your face all over social media. It’s like, come on. Get over yourself.
 
This is absolutely true. I've never been around so many rich kids in my life, and it's annoying. We had our spring break recently, and people kept asking where I was going, not if I was going somewhere. They assumed going somewhere was the default. I can't wait for the day that going on vacation is the norm for me.
 
smallmediumbig said:
We had our spring break recently, and people kept asking where I was going, not if I was going somewhere.
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Do you know where I was during spring breaks? Gunning in the library! Seriously. Gunning forever, forever gunning - that’s my motto. I’m glad I went to dental school at 28. This high school level drama is beneath me.

Big Hoss
 
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Yeah I feel you. My roommate drives a Ferrari to school while I'm still stuck with a 2015 Nissan that my dad got me out guilt because the chump couldn't afford a Tesla . These kids have no idea how easy they have it.
 
Jueves said:
Yeah I feel you. My roommate drives a Ferrari to school while I'm still stuck with a 2015 Nissan that my dad got me out guilt because the chump couldn't afford a Tesla . These kids have no idea how easy they have it.
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Ok, damn. Well that's pretty extreme. Why is he even rooming with you?
 
High school indeed. You folks are in here gossiping about your clueless entitled classmates when you don't know anything about them. You'e looking down on them and judging - what does that say about character? And don't for a second claim you wouldn't be living it up the same way if you had the means.

What you will soon realize is mom and dad's money means nothing when all of you are taking the same exams, practicals, projects, etc. There will be times when you feel like you are falling behind and those same classmates will be more than happy to give you a hand, just because.
 
GypsyHummus said:
The one that irks me the most are the “mission” trips to costa rico. It’s like role-playing a good person while taking a vacation.

And then they rub their medical tourism in your face all over social media. It’s like, come on. Get over yourself.
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Idk what school yours is but at my school, the Costa Rica mission trip people actually give up the only week off they get in a long time to work 10-12 hours a day and help patients without access to care get the care they need. It’s a serious commitment here.

I know it’s not the same in every school, but I do think that the 2nd/3rd/4th years in my program who give up their break to go volunteer on these trips are doing anything but “role-playing a good person while taking a vacation.”
 
Big Time Hoosier said:
Do you know where I was during spring breaks? Gunning in the library! Seriously. Gunning forever, forever gunning - that’s my motto. I’m glad I went to dental school at 28. This high school level drama is beneath me.

Big Hoss
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If you were above drama you'd let us complain without interjecting to remind us how much better you are. #ChangeMyMind
 
schmoob said:
High school indeed. You folks are in here gossiping about your clueless entitled classmates when you don't know anything about them. You'e looking down on them and judging - what does that say about character? And don't for a second claim you wouldn't be living it up the same way if you had the means.

What you will soon realize is mom and dad's money means nothing when all of you are taking the same exams, practicals, projects, etc. There will be times when you feel like you are falling behind and those same classmates will be more than happy to give you a hand, just because.
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Sorry, I do not agree. The rich kids in my class were living it up. I was up at 5 am every day drawing blood at the VA hospital across the street and parking cars on the weekend. Always tired.
There were 5 of us on the plebotomy schedule. We helped each other.
 
This is like another episode of the Haves and Have Nots. Life is how you live your life and treat others regardless of your finances. You can't take the money with you. What I sense here is animosity towards others who have it financially better than you. That's BS. Doesn't matter if the kids inherited the money, born into the money ..... at some point ..... SOMEONE in their family worked their asses off to EARN that fortune and I respect that individual for working hard, earning their fortune and not asking for hand outs.

My ortho residency in NY had a total of 4 residents 1st year and 4 residents 2nd year. I was by far the poorest of the 8. My family has no money. One resident's father was an Orthopedic surgeon. Another parent was a Cardiologist. Another was a pediatric dentist. Another was married to a NY Investment banker. Another was a dentist married to another dentist. Another's father was an Orthodontist. Another resident was married to a NY stock broker. Get the picture?

Every Friday .... these residents planned their ski trips to Maine or Vermont. Talked about the NY broadway shows they were attending. Get the picture? My wife and I lived in an efficiency apartment. Our weekends were me studying like crazy and then we would drive to a small store in Yonkers to buy $50 of groceries to last us the whole week.

Point is not once did I ever feel malice towards my fellow residents for having it better than myself. They treated me just like anyone else. We all worked together with a common goal.

I'll say it again. Worry about yourself and stop wasting energy envying others that are financially better off.
 
You claim that they're unrelatable, d-bags, unpleasant to be around, etc, but it's tough to take your account seriously because it sounds like you really, really, really don't want to like them - almost like they have to prove themselves to you. Strange.
 
I will chime in once more, and then leave this thread alone.
Having enjoyed life on both sides of this spectrum, and raising my children in the ultra wealthy suburbs of NYC (not the public housing I grew up in), I have seen the difference first hand.
Wealthy Kids:
Great clothes
Great cars
After school private tutoring (homework always done and perfect)
After school private sports coaching (hitting, pitching, fielding coaches refining rudimentary skills..$100/hr)
After school music lessons (pro quality instruments, broadway musician teachers)
Vacation to exotic destination every school break (or at least to the family home in FL, CA, Hilton Head, etc.)
Not Rich Kids:
I am reluctant to say poor as I never felt poor. We always had a place to sleep and food on the table
Cheap clothes
No car
After school tutoring at the school, in a large group.
No private sports coaching
Music in school only ( played old, broken down school instrument )
School break meant watching younger sibs while parents worked

Wealthy children have things much easier, as they are more prepared due to their parents ability to pay for all the extras. Someone does not always work hard for this BTW. I know many families in my town where neither the mother or father work. Their family fortune was inherited. If someone once worked for this fortune, it was several generations ago, and who knows how it was made? Not ranting here, but I maintain that children from privileged homes have things easier. Although everyone has to take the SAT, it is quite different when you attend the Princeton review and have a private tutor. The college application process is less stressful when someone is editing the essay for you. Just saying. Pressure to get into the "right" college? My point exactly.
 
Jokes aside- I don't think its just the money that gives these kids the edge, but the access of having good role models and resources available to them. Someone who came from a lower middle class background might not have the same financial knowledge on investments, money handling, etc. as someone who came from a family that has succeeded well financially. Same goes for kids who had parents as dentists and knowledge of business practices. You can't argue that its hard work that sets people apart- there objectively better ways to study, better prep materials, and certain life outlooks that aren't available to people unless they are guided by a solid mentor/role model.

As for money, a blatant example on how money makes it objectively easier for people is the concept of therapy. People with money could afford therapy and work out their psychological issues more readily than poor people- giving them much better chances of succeeding in life and career wise.

But, these are examples you should be arguing, OP. Instead you're hating on kids because they can sip on Mojitos in Cuba while you're stuck in the dreary old US, and that they're driving a lambo while you have to take the bus.
 
setdoc7 said:
Great clothes
Great cars
After school private tutoring (homework always done and perfect)
After school private sports coaching (hitting, pitching, fielding coaches refining rudimentary skills..$100/hr)
After school music lessons (pro quality instruments, broadway musician teachers)
Vacation to exotic destination every school break (or at least to the family home in FL, CA, Hilton Head, etc.)
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All things that don't matter in the end. I encourage you all to find what truly matters in life. Do that and you will be happy. For me it's my family, my faith, and my freedom. If I've got those, I'm good. Come what may and love it!

Big Hoss
 
You know what’s sad, people just complain and whine about their financial situations and not being able to take luxury trips but forget that there are students who suffer from PLENTY of other problems. I’d trade my financial situation in a heart beat if I could stay healthy and out of pain during school. Literally have to study while being in pain for a chronic disease that I really cant control and isn’t curable. Income is controllable. Sure there are rich healthy people who are living the life during dental school but that’s not the norm. Nobody should assume someone has it easy because they have money.
 
OP - you seem like a much bigger d-bag then your classmates and a jealous one
 
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