do you guys have a bf/gf?

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pumpUup

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I was thinking about my future. After 4 year, I will become a dentist, work hard to pay back my loans...and by then I will become around 35 years old.

I am starting to see my friends, around 25 years old, trying to find someone to be their husband and wife.

I, as a healthy person, also thought about this matter.

Who is going to be my husband/wife(yeah, I am trying to hide my gender here 🙂)? Where will I meet her/him?

If you are applying or got accepted to a dental school, I want to ask if you guys also thought about this.

Dental school is very tough. I doubt that I will have time to go look for a girl outside the campus. I heard about blind dating but I don't know if I really wanna do that.

If you are not married yet, are you planning to find your future bf/gf in the same class? the same program but different year? different health program such as nursing, medical, or pharmacy? the same school but an undergraduate student? high school student😱?

Or did you already meet your fiance before you started your 1st year in dental school?
 
So I met my fiancee 5 years ago in college. I'm starting school this coming year after 4 years out of college. We are getting married in just a few weeks, which is perfect to get that and a honeymoon in before school starts. I've heard from my dentist that dental school is tough on relationships, which i'm sure will be tough on ours but my fiancee is very supportive. We'll be about 30 when I graduate.

I have heard from a current dental student that you DO NOT want to date anybody from your class. It's a big NO siree, no Datey the classmatey... Just that it becomes super awkward and then stressful and uncomfortable, especially if it doesn't work out...
 
I am currently single, and I plan to remain at this status until I finish dental school.

As Goffdent said, dental school (and a variety of other graduate programs) are very stressful on a relationship. Personally, I wouldn't think it fair to bring another party into a life of persistent studying/stress for the next 4 years (of course I think there are exceptions).

I wouldn't count on being single to be set in stone through dental school, but my intent is to be persuaded in decisions with that notion in mind.

Ultimately, one never knows that twists and turns life will throw at you. I believe I'm pretty well prepared to deal with circumstances any way.

By the way, congrats, Goffdent!
 
Thanks MrBeans, I agree with you on many points. But with my fiancee and I being serious before engagement, we decided it really wasn't fair to make one wait another 4 years just to get married after school. 9 years is a long time to be "dating" or engaged, especially when my fiancee is going to be the breadwinner in the realationship when i'm in dental school.
 
I am 22 years old, currently single, I am planning to stay that way until graduation from dental school. But, I will plan to settle down after that.
 
First of all, congrats Goffdent! 🙂

Well, I'm single and i've thought about this too...i know plenty of dental schools have classes with the medical and graduate students and i'm sure i'll make friends and if those friends have other friends maybe there's potential there?

honestly, idk i'm trying not to worry about it, because then i think of having to go on the Bachlorette or something after dental school and having to find someone that way. i didnt date anyone after freshman year of undergrad because i got so focused on getting into dental school there wasnt time and when guys werent as driven as me and tried to deter me from my goal it really pissed me off

i'd like to meet someone eventuallyp, and if i do i imagine its gonna be hard to start a relationship with someone while in school...unless that someone is going thru a similar situation (medical, graduate, pharmacy school etc) idk i'm gonna go with what life gives me

sometimes i worry im TOO driven for a girl and i'll just scare guys away but i'm not changing so hopefully there's someone somewhere for me lol

pumpUup said:
Dental school is very tough. I doubt that I will have time to go look for a girl outside the campus. I heard about blind dating but I don't know if I really wanna do that.
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o and ^^ haha gotcha 😛
 
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Interesting thread.

I have thought about this a lot also. Personally, I prefer to be in a relationship rather than single. I look for females in the health professions because they have an understanding of the stress and amount of time spent studying.

However, me and my girlfriend just split up and I have one more year of undergrad. I don't plan on looking for another until I graduate. The chances of finding someone for a year and having it last and even have them end up in the same area to where you go to graduate school is unlikely. And I personally can not handle the struggles of a long distance relationship. Tried many times and failed every time.

Therefore, I plan to wait till graduate school with no intent of finding someone in the same class that just seems like a disaster waiting to happen. However, there are plenty of other programs at each and every school!
 
This same thread came up last year at some point also. I have had a girlfriend for 3 years now and told her where I chose and she was able to get a transfer within her company and she came with. I have no idea how things will change once I start dental school this fall and she knows that. So, we'll see what happens!
 
ItalianPrincess said:
honestly i didnt date anyone after freshman year of undergrad because i got so focused on getting into dental school there wasnt time and when guys werent as driven as me and tried to deter me from my goal
Click to expand...

I found the same thing. The girls that I casually dated ultimately ended up trying to discourage me from graduate school because all they wanted to do was party, hang out, get a job (a job that one doesn't even need an undergraduate degree for), etc. Maybe I just found girls with a lack of maturity or vastly differing interests.

Not that there's anything wrong with recreation, but I think it needs to be in moderation. It seems like the very determined seldom have relationships because of this frequent scenario.

I find nothing wrong with people who don't have an academic drive, but when they start putting a damper on my ambitions, I cannot deal with that.
 
I wouldn't worry about setting a specific timeline for love. If you find someone you interested in then pursue them, no matter where you are in your life. You will always be busy with something, such as dental school, work, opening a practice, etc. It all about balance people!!
 
UCSD6 said:
I wouldn't worry about setting a specific timeline for love. If you find someone you interested in then pursue them, no matter where you are in your life. You will always be busy with something, such as dental school, work, opening a practice, etc. It all about balance people!!
Click to expand...

Very true indeed. 👍
 
UCSD6 said:
I wouldn't worry about setting a specific timeline for love. If you find someone you interested in then pursue them, no matter where you are in your life. You will always be busy with something, such as dental school, work, opening a practice, etc. It all about balance people!!
Click to expand...

Agreed.

Personally, I would like to date again but for me the only thing that is important right now is my education. If I happen to find that girl in undergrad or in grad school she will know that my primary focus is getting through school and graduating and only then can I turn my attention fully to the relationship. And I'm not 100% opposed to finding someone in DS, yeah it may be awkward but they will understand the stresses and workloads that come along with DS. At least thats my theory anyways. Although I might find out that I'm wrong and it will be more awkward than not :laugh:
 
I don't think anyone should be worried. Worst, worst case scenario, go sit on a park bench the same spot everyday until you meet someone interesting, and then be like "I'm in dental school, planning to be a dentist..."

I bet at least one person will be interested. Next thing you know, 😍😍
 
i dont think you can plan to meet your future partner in the same class....those kinds of things cant be forced.

try eharmony or something you'll have more to choose from!
 
komradrobot said:
i dont think you can plan to meet your future partner in the same class....those kinds of things cant be forced.

try eharmony or something you'll have more to choose from!
Click to expand...

No way, Myspace and Facebook are the way to match. Craigslist anyone?
 
Or maybe we can fall in love with our patient 😀
 
goffdent said:
I have heard from a current dental student that you DO NOT want to date anybody from your class. It's a big NO siree, no Datey the classmatey... Just that it becomes super awkward and then stressful and uncomfortable, especially if it doesn't work out...
Click to expand...

I know that sometimes things get uncomfortable and awkward, but I wouldn't let that deter me from dating someone in my class, if I found someone worthwhile to date and had the time. I certainly wouldn't sleep around or date too many people from my class, but if I did find that I had the time to date awkwardness in the class wouldn't be something I would think much about.

Wait...that would make my mother happy. 😱 *runs the other way* :laugh:

Maybe I have this opinion because my parents met during their second year of medical school 😍, and they really supported each other with studying and things like that while they were in medical school together. If you're with someone, and they support you through a time period like dental/medical school where you're really developing yourself, I think that that could be a plus in a relationship. That's really the other point of view, I think.

To the OP:

I have found that sometimes worthwhile relationships develop int he most unexpected places during those times when you're not looking for them. The most important thing is to keep your eyes/options open but not be looking for anything. I'm sure you're going to find your future wife/girlfriend somewhere!
 
I think the biggest disadvantage is when one thinks/tries to hard to have a gf/bf or be in a relationship.

Honestly, we are about to emabark on a new chapter in life and nobody really knows what to expect and what dental school studying and life will be like. I think its best to deal with that right now b/c we have all been working hard to get accepted into dental school. I believe that if you dont stress out too much about it is when things will fall into place and you will find that someone.

Also, on a side note i have heard from several people that the 1st 2 years are the most difficult with studying and your 3rd and 4th year you might actually have some down time and have perhaps more time to date b/c you might have some free evenings.
 
First It really depends. If you have a non-supportive gf that wants attention 24/7.. well that is pretty much self-explanatory. I had points where I wanted to break up not just due to the relationship stress but also for dating fees.
I wouldn't date a dental classmate due to fact that dental school is such a small world compared to the whole lot of people out there available in the future. One thing that I heard most common is that you don't want to date someone in same work field, which you start with argument due to the profession and the difference between relationship and profession becomes unclear.
I would definitely date someone that is intered in health profession or science. I start to see dating a non-science person, has different aptitude and actitude for everything.
 
takedailyfiber said:
I don't think anyone should be worried. Worst, worst case scenario, go sit on a park bench the same spot everyday until you meet someone interesting, and then be like "I'm in dental school, planning to be a dentist..."

I bet at least one person will be interested. Next thing you know, 😍😍
Click to expand...

We always see that in movies, but I wonder, how often this happens -_-
 
I didn't plan on being in a relationship before DS because I thought I wouldn't have time and I didn't want to do the long distance thing. As it has turned out, I met someone while home from college between undergrad and DS, dated for 2 years, and he ended up moving out here (across the country) with me. He is now my fiancee and as cheesy as it sounds I don't know how I could have done the last year without him. We do have time for each other (albeit, we have to schedule it in sometimes) and he is incredible supportive. I am very lucky. Many of my classmates are in relationships or married and it isn't a problem. My point here I suppose is don't count out a relationship before or during dental school. It's tough sometimes, but totally worth it. In addition, don't date classmates - it gets awkward. Date outside your college or outside your year - that way if things end you don't have to see them every single day.
 
Try to avoid marrying another dentist. Unless they go into Ortho or some other specialty than you.

Don't date your patients. Or a member of your staff either. That's so tacky!
 
SeattleRDH said:
Try to avoid marrying another dentist. Unless they go into Ortho or some other specialty than you.

Don't date your patients. Or a member of your staff either. That's so tacky!
Click to expand...

Grey's Anatomy.
 
This is way too personal of a subject, my motto is that if its meant to be, you'll work it out. If its not working out, its not meant to be.
 
I have a GF. She's staying my GF for the next 4 years I hope. Yes, it's gonna suck but we can do it! 👍:xf:
 
single and love it now. no serious commitment. and im not planning to piss of my money after working four years for it.
 
I had a girlfriend but no more, now I have a wife, lol. Oh, and it's awesome.
 
Good question, sadly life moves on when people put career before starting a family. Luckily for me I started my family before my career. Yes, it made school more difficult and it will continue to be more difficult but I don't regret my decision for an instant.

Don't hit the panic button but realize there are consequences for deciding to put dental school as a higher priority than getting married earlier.
 
For those of you who got married before starting dental school, where do you guys get the money to support the new family? house, food, utilities, baby....etc?

For me, dental school alone already costs more than all the money in my bank account so I need to get loan. I never had any debt in my life so it is already giving me a lot of pressure. If I had to spend money for my wife and baby at the same time that I pay for dental school, I think it will be even tougher than my imagination.
 
pumpUup said:
I was thinking about my future. After 4 year, I will become a dentist, work hard to pay back my loans...and by then I will become around 35 years old.

I am starting to see my friends, around 25 years old, trying to find someone to be their husband and wife.

I, as a healthy person, also thought about this matter.

Who is going to be my husband/wife(yeah, I am trying to hide my gender here 🙂)? Where will I meet her/him?

If you are applying or got accepted to a dental school, I want to ask if you guys also thought about this.

Dental school is very tough. I doubt that I will have time to go look for a girl outside the campus. I heard about blind dating but I don't know if I really wanna do that.

If you are not married yet, are you planning to find your future bf/gf in the same class? the same program but different year? different health program such as nursing, medical, or pharmacy? the same school but an undergraduate student? high school student😱?

Or did you already meet your fiance before you started your 1st year in dental school?
Click to expand...
You tried, but you gave your gender away:laugh:
Anyways! Seems like you got too much free time on your hands.
In my view, if it's supposed to happen, it'll happen! You don't necessarily need to chase down girls/guys. Sometimes you find the right person without actively looking for him/her.
For now, I suggest you focus on your studies!

 
pumpUup said:
For those of you who got married before starting dental school, where do you guys get the money to support the new family? house, food, utilities, baby....etc?

For me, dental school alone already costs more than all the money in my bank account so I need to get loan. I never had any debt in my life so it is already giving me a lot of pressure. If I had to spend money for my wife and baby at the same time that I pay for dental school, I think it will be even tougher than my imagination.
Click to expand...
Two incomes are always better than one!
 
nze82 said:
You tried, but you gave your gender away:laugh:
Anyways! Seems like you got too much free time on your hands.
In my view, if it's supposed to happen, it'll happen! You don't necessarily need to chase down girls/guys. Sometimes you find the right person without actively looking for him/her.
For now, I suggest you focus on your studies!
Click to expand...

Dont ask Dont Tell....gender still hidden...
 
Nope! Relationships are for after you settle down and have a degree. Maybe find someone in your fourth year or something if you really need to.
 
No worries sweetie, I have relatives who've met their future significant other at dental school, in fact, two recent graduates are getting married this Saturday!! =DD

I'm sure things will work out when you meet the right person. In my case, I turned down a lot of dates during undergrad because of studies and the whole long distance relationship thing. Plus, I think it'd be nice if my boyfriend understood what I'd be going through =)
 
Blue Panther said:
Why would he want to avoid a best case scenario?
Click to expand...

Dating classmates can be disastrous. I've seen it happen. It's like cold war in class of 80 people. It seems like 2/15 dental student couples actually work out and get married.
 
KittySquared said:
Dating classmates can be disastrous. I've seen it happen. It's like cold war in class of 80 people. It seems like 2/15 dental student couples actually work out and get married.
Click to expand...

Well best case scenario was marrying another dentist who did not graduate with you!
 
SeattleRDH said:
Then marry a doctor or pharmacist.

If you both do the same thing that's all you'll talk about. Running a practice together is just bad news. That's why they say 'don't mix business with pleasure.'
Click to expand...

My parents have practiced together for over 20 years and have been happily married for over 30, so it's definitely dependent on the couple. If anything, it appears to have made their relationship stronger.
 
SeattleRDH said:
Then marry a doctor or pharmacist.

If you both do the same thing that's all you'll talk about. Running a practice together is just bad news. That's why they say 'don't mix business with pleasure.'
Click to expand...

For sake of interesting discussions between the couple, they probably should not have kids either because that's all they will talk about.
 
It's funny how ppl say dont date in your class.. we have about 15 couples in our class right now & I'm just finishing my 1st year! haha.. i dont think i would ever though if i was single..
The D'11s- upper classmates have 5 in-class couples who are engaged! So i dont know.. it might work for some..
I was in a long distance before moving to D-school & now my bf will be moving here in the fall to attend an MBA program.
You are definitely busy, but you find the time to have a relationship. As for dating, the biggest problem is when you go out it's with your classmates & you dont get to meet anyone else. I obviously don't care, but some of my single classmates are suffering bc of that.
My biggest concern of who to marry is the fact that I'm taking on so many loans and giving up 4 yrs of my life, working my butt off to make sure I get an amazing career out of this, I expect the person that I marry to do the same. I don't mean dentistry, but to works just as hard and be just as ambitious as I am. Is that an unfair thing to expect from someone? My ideal situation would be to marry someone who is more successful then I will be, or at least the same.
thoughts?
 
ItalianPrincess said:
honestly, idk i'm trying not to worry about it, because then i think of having to go on the Bachlorette or something after dental school and having to find someone that way.
Click to expand...

^ I lol'd here. :laugh:

Yea, I agree with most everyone here. Don't worry about it, just concentrate on school and go with the flow. Love has a way of avoiding you when you're searching for it, and falling into your lap when you least expect it. 😀
 
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