I've read a number of your posts and believe it's up to me to dissuade you. Here goes:
brotherbloat said:
I know people keep saying if you don't know it's for you 100% then don't do it, but how can anyone say they want to go into a particular field 100%? I find this hard to believe, there is always some uncertainty and no one can honestly say that medicine does not have its cons.
now more than ever, a career in medicine has its cons.
But I'm 28, old enough to have some life experience and increased "self-awareness," and I'm STILL undecided, after a year of post-bacc, working full time in hosp, and two MCATs. What can I do to decide? I'm giving myself until June 1.
I've made pro and con lists, talked endlessly with my medical hubby, and shadowed. I'm so confused.
You're still very undecided after a full year as a post-bac. Sounds to me like you don't really want to do it, but just can't think of anything else either. There are many terrific and fulfilling (not to mention lucrative) fields in which you can work.
I'm surprised that talking with your physician husband hasn't totally dissuaded you. If you have a good understanding of the realities of medicine, you'll see how awful things have become.
On the one hand, being a doctor is all I ever wanted to do since I was a wee tot. I chose another path in college--art--because I was convinced I sucked in science and I had no discipline back then.
I found I HATED the art world and felt totally unfulfilled after a MAster's. Thus, I decided to go back to my childhood dream. I've been all gung-ho until this past winter, when I started having doubts. But I cannot for the life of me find another career that I want to do instead. Everything else looks equally unappealing. Medicine has many of the things that I want, but the thought of spending ages 29-37 in school/ residency doesn't seem too appealing. Your 30s are a very formative time. MAybe less so than your 20's, I'm not sure.
Since you were a "wee tot?" Come on. You're not a kid anymore. A "childhood dream" is just that. A naive view of an idealized career that doesn't actually exist. No, spending your entire 30's in medical training sounds terribly unappealing.
Some of my concerns:
Can you really be a good mom, wife, and med student/resident or will one of these suffer and your sanity as well? I do not do well when pulled in a million different directions. I want to be a top-notch physician, and a top-notch family woman. Another career would be more accomodating because there wouldn't be the relentless studying.
No, you can't be good at all things. Something will suffer. You'll hear from married posters with kids, who will give you a rosy view of things. Yes, they are successful moms/wives. But for most people, things suffer. There have been numerous divorces/breakups/home-life difficulties among my med school classmates, and I'm just ready to graduate. I can only imagine things become worse through residency.
Do I want to be in my 30s with my nose in the books or out there enjoying life--my spouse, a house, vacations, time with the kids, etc. Will I have the energy and desire at 34 to be taking calls overnight?
You only spend about 2 years "studying all hours of the day and night" -- your ms1 and ms2 years. After that, you will have to balance studying to maintain knowledge, studying for exams, and work in the clinical setting. As a medical student, this is a pain in the a--. As a resident, it only gets worse. As an attending, it can get better; it can also get worse.
Will I ever find anything else that draws me like medicine? Will I ever find another career as fulfilling? Corporate world is not for me, and I have hated every job I've ever held b/c I don't do well "as an employee"--I'm very independent and prefer to have things done my way.
If you're truly independent-minded, medicine may not be for you. Now more than ever, with EBM-inspired cookbook medicine, insurance guidelines, and hospital administrators breathing down your throat, physician autonomy is at an all-time low. Even for the physician in private practice, the "autonomy" isn't what it used to be.
Will I ever feel "challenged" by anything else but medicine? I have never been challenged the way I had been with my post-bacc courses, and I found that me and science really click well togther. I love the challenge of patient diagnosis.
The challenge goes away very quickly. There's always something new to learn, but the fact remains that, no matter what specialty you enter, most of what you do will be routine.
I want to be well compensated for my time. Any job with a salary less than the six figures will not satisfy my desire to be the breadwinner in my family.
I hope this doesn't sound too chauvinistic, but isn't your husband a physician? Why must you be the breadwinner?