First Year Jitters

[PeterGriffin]

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I know that almost all MSI students have their uncertainties with whether or not they really want to go into medicine. Over the past several weeks I have been thinking about this considerably. Many people have given me some great advice and I am very grateful for that.

However, the common theme to all the advice is to just 'stick with it, everyone feels this way at sometime.' I'm sure that this is the case for 99.9% of medical students but there has to be that .1% that really doesn't want to be in medicine. I know that schools really don't want to lose students after they matriculate, but what about students that figure out medicine isn't for them? I'm afraid that I'm falling into that category.

I know that I should have thought about this a lot more during my undergrad years and while I was applying but I didn't and know I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. I took a spot in our class that could have been filled by someone that really wants to be a physician. I want to at least make it through the first semester so I can say that I gave it a shot, but I'm losing motivation every day.

Not looking for sympathy or anything, just my little rant for the day.

 

[SaltySqueegee]

I'm pretty sure I personally fall into the 99.9% category that momentarily have doubts. How do I know this?

When I'm sitting through lectures, and plugging away at seemingly pointless ad nauseum, I would rather be cleaning garbage up for a living at times.

However, when I sit in on my once a week class for Problem Based Learning with Clinical Skills, I can actually see my knowledge applied to the real world. It's quite exciting, and I love making differential diagnoses. In actuality, I just diagnosed a fictitional 2.5yr/o with Sickle Cell/Thalassemia. Makes you feel as though you're truly making progress. 👍

Do you have any Problem Based Clinic Classes???

 

[care bear]

on an interesting note, i just read in one of the residency forums that one of the founders of SDN is leaving his established career in family medicine in order to pursue a PhD in neuroscience, and doesn't expect to return to clinical medicine.

apparently he had severe doubts during his pre-clinical years as well. makes you think. . .

 

[ice_23]

However, when I sit in on my once a week class for Problem Based Learning with Clinical Skills, I can actually see my knowledge applied to the real world. It's quite exciting, and I love making differential diagnoses. In actuality, I just diagnosed a fictitional 2.5yr/o with Sickle Cell/Thalassemia. Makes you feel as though you're truly making progress. 👍

Do you have any Problem Based Clinic Classes???

Do all PBL's start off with Sickle Cell/Thalassemia? Ours started with that too....🙂

-Ice

 

[Tiki]

I'm pretty sure I personally fall into the 99.9% category that momentarily have doubts. How do I know this?

When I'm sitting through lectures, and plugging away at seemingly pointless ad nauseum, I would rather be cleaning garbage up for a living at times.

However, when I sit in on my once a week class for Problem Based Learning with Clinical Skills, I can actually see my knowledge applied to the real world. It's quite exciting, and I love making differential diagnoses. In actuality, I just diagnosed a fictitional 2.5yr/o with Sickle Cell/Thalassemia. Makes you feel as though you're truly making progress. 👍

Do you have any Problem Based Clinic Classes???

I totally agree with you. It is so easy to forget why I want to be a doctor when I'm sitting in front of Big Moore trying to remember origins and insertions. It really is driving me crazy, and for awhile I was starting to doubt whether this was something I really wanted.

However, we have an Intro to the Patient class and Case Based learning, and it is these experiences that have helped me realize that this is something that I want to be doing.

 

[SaltySqueegee]

Do all PBL's start off with Sickle Cell/Thalassemia? Ours started with that too....🙂

-Ice

Maybe. It's probably one of those introductory ones that allows us to apply our vast HISTOLOGY knowledge.

 

[PeterGriffin]

We have a clinical classes that has a little bit of problem based learning, but we dont take our real PBL class until 2nd year. I wish we could get into that stuff earlier.

 

[gatsbyjo]

I feel like that a lot of the times because I am just not sure that I can work day in and day out with these types of people. Plus, Im getting married next summer and I keep worrying about whether I will be able to be a "good" wife/mom with a doctor's sched.

But I also know that you can choose specialties based on the atmosphere and the hours that you want to work so I feel loads better when I remember that.

And also there are millions of ways to use an MD. Thats how I keep motivated.

gats

p.s. don't take my advice cause im a lowly MSI and I get REAL moody about staying in school.

 

[TTSD]

Sickle Cell is a perfect example for many different concepts so I guess everyone loves to use it.

Man, we had our mock practical and it was insane. 70 stations, one mintue per station, up to three questions. Thank God it was just a mock and the TAs intentionally try to bust your balls. The profs put together a version of their own "mock" and it was extremely easy compared to the mock given to us by the TAs.

Still, I can totally understand the jitters. The stack of books sitting on my desk and the amount of reading PER day is worse than say, you were an English major in college! But it's a humanities amount of reading plus it's science.

But overall, I must say.. brain-juice wise.. so far a lot easier than undergrad.. just a lot more work needed.

 

[PeterGriffin]

But overall, I must say.. brain-juice wise.. so far a lot easier than undergrad.. just a lot more work needed.

I would definately agree with that. Nothing has been very difficult so far, it's just so much material 😱

 

[Blake]

You guys are starting to freak me out every day. I'm wondering if I'm an alien, because I actually enjoy med school so far, yes, even with the long hours of studying. It'll be worth it in the end. In 10 weeks, I'll be done with the books ( momentarily ) and I'll spend 3 weeks in an hospital. This really motivates to keep on working hard in med school. Anyway, I haven't had a single thought about leaving or doing something else so far. Am I normal 😕

 

[velo]

We have a clinical classes that has a little bit of problem based learning, but we dont take our real PBL class until 2nd year. I wish we could get into that stuff earlier.

does your school have any preceptorships? shadowing? other such clinical activites? That might remind you of why you want to do this! Good luck!

 

[Sean2tall]

You guys are starting to freak me out every day. I'm wondering if I'm an alien, because I actually enjoy med school so far, yes, even with the long hours of studying. It'll be worth it in the end. In 10 weeks, I'll be done with the books ( momentarily ) and I'll spend 3 weeks in an hospital. This really motivates to keep on working hard in med school. Anyway, I haven't had a single thought about leaving or doing something else so far. Am I normal 😕

Don't worry. Although lots of people are going to experience nervousness about what they're getting into, there are plenty of us who are happy to be here and excited to be learning medicine, despite a lot of studying.

I think that, in general, you are going to see a lot more posts on here about people who are unhappy or stressed just because it inherently involves a lot more questions and advice seeking. Fewer people are going to sign on and start a thread titled, "I love medical school and my life rules. That is all I have to say." But, to be honest, I do feel that way.

 

[Blake]

Don't worry. Although lots of people are going to experience nervousness about what they're getting into, there are plenty of us who are happy to be here and excited to be learning medicine, despite a lot of studying.

I think that, in general, you are going to see a lot more posts on here about people who are unhappy or stressed just because it inherently involves a lot more questions and advice seeking. Fewer people are going to sign on and start a thread titled, "I love medical school and my life rules. That is all I have to say." But, to be honest, I do feel that way.

Good to hear I'm not the only one 😀 . Wanna start an " Happy Med Student " union ? 😉

 

[Blake]

I'm pretty sure I personally fall into the 99.9% category that momentarily have doubts. How do I know this?

When I'm sitting through lectures, and plugging away at seemingly pointless ad nauseum, I would rather be cleaning garbage up for a living at times.

However, when I sit in on my once a week class for Problem Based Learning with Clinical Skills, I can actually see my knowledge applied to the real world. It's quite exciting, and I love making differential diagnoses. In actuality, I just diagnosed a fictitional 2.5yr/o with Sickle Cell/Thalassemia. Makes you feel as though you're truly making progress. 👍

Do you have any Problem Based Clinic Classes???

I wonder if motivation is increased by PBL. My school is mostly PBL, and I just love it so far. No long lectures for us, just active learning through each problem. And we just had one on Beta-Thalassemia too 😛

 

[PeterGriffin]

I wonder if motivation is increased by PBL. My school is mostly PBL, and I just love it so far. No long lectures for us, just active learning through each problem. And we just had one on Beta-Thalassemia too 😛

I really wish my school did more of that. We have to sit through lectures all morning and then it's lab time all afternoon...not much time left for PBL until 2nd year. I've been forced to start skipping some of my classes but luckily they are all streamed online.

 

[azcomdiddy]

People like what they are good at. If you do well in medical school, you will like it. It's usually the students that don't do well that begin to have doubts. If you want to enjoy medical school, start focusing and improving your grades. It makes the medical school process so much more palatable when you do well. Something to think about

 

[PeterGriffin]

People like what they are good at. If you do well in medical school, you will like it. It's usually the students that don't do well that begin to have doubts. If you want to enjoy medical school, start focusing and improving your grades. It makes the medical school process so much more palatable when you do well. Something to think about

Well I have my first round of tests coming up soon so we'll see about that. It's not really the coursework that's getting to me, it's doubts about what I want to do in the future. I realize that MS1 and the actually practicing medicine are very far detached so I'm trying not to judge very much by my classes. And I actually dont mind studying. But I do see your point. I guess I'll have to wait and see how I do on these first exams. Back to the books.

 

[Rod Farva]

People like what they are good at. If you do well in medical school, you will like it. It's usually the students that don't do well that begin to have doubts. If you want to enjoy medical school, start focusing and improving your grades. It makes the medical school process so much more palatable when you do well. Something to think about

I've done well in med school for over 2 years and I hate it. I'm just too far in debt to escape.

 

[SaltySqueegee]

I'm just too far in debt to escape.

😱 😳

 

[PeterGriffin]

I've done well in med school for over 2 years and I hate it. I'm just too far in debt to escape.

So if you could go back to your first year knowing what you now know, would have withdrawn then?

 

[Neuronix]

What were the studies I've read... Something like over 25% of fourth years doubt their decision and more than that amount of practicing doctors wish they hadn't done it. So, you won't be alone if you decide you're unhappy.

As for me? I'm still perfectly happy with becoming a doctor. As for whether or not I'm actually going to become a physician-scientist is up in the air.

 

[chameleonknight]

Try to look at a broad view of specialities. What is it about being a doctor that you don't like? The patients? The time commitment? The science?

Or is it the lack of something that is upsetting you? Is it boring? Do you miss your family and project that sadness into your studies?

Your med school should provide counselors for you guys. Go talk to one of them about this; they may be able to shed some light on your situation that we via the internet could not. No matter what you are feeling, they will support you and listen to you.

Good luck in your decisions 🙂

 

[fpr85]

Although I have not yet entered medical school, I hope to get in(I'm still a Freshmen Undergrad) and can only imagine the difficulty you're going through, but this is what I have to say.

I don't mean for this to be flaming of any sort

Honestly what it seems like is that medical school isn't what you expected it to be, I'm sure you expected it to be difficult but not this difficult.

So what you're trying to do is take the easy way out by just saying "I can't take it anymore, this is too hard" and quitting.

The question to answer is, if you took all the time to research medical schools to apply to, fill out applications, interviews, etc. then obviously medicine means a lot to you. Had it not, when the time came around to do all of the above (applications, interviews, etc.) you would have said "screw this, this is taking too much of my precious time", and quit....

It was kind of like when I was IB Chemistry in HS, I didn't understand a damn thing! But I stuck with it.... despite the fact that I failed the first two quarters I stuck with it to the end and managed to pull my grade up to a B-

YOU NEED TO JUST STICK WITH IT, MAN!

Ok, am I making any sense? I didn't think so
I can't seem to organize my thoughts to tell you what I mean... perhaps someone else can carry on from here...

EDIT: I just realized something: Had medical school been like undergrad (in terms of difficulty, etc.) would you be asking yourself the same question, "is this right for me", now?

 

[efex101]

Nobody but another medical student "can" really tell/know/imagine what it is like. Of course we knew it would be hard, of course we knew a lot of time would be spent studying, it is waaay beyond that. Hard to explain to someone still in undergrad...I do not think that anyone *really* knew what they were getting into until you hit MS1...

 

[care bear]

Although I have not yet entered medical school, I hope to get in(I'm still a Freshmen Undergrad) and can only imagine the difficulty you're going through, but this is what I have to say.

I don't mean for this to be flaming of any sort

Honestly what it seems like is that medical school isn't what you expected it to be, I'm sure you expected it to be difficult but not this difficult.

So what you're trying to do is take the easy way out by just saying "I can't take it anymore, this is too hard" and quitting.

The question to answer is, if you took all the time to research medical schools to apply to, fill out applications, interviews, etc. then obviously medicine means a lot to you. Had it not, when the time came around to do all of the above (applications, interviews, etc.) you would have said "screw this, this is taking too much of my precious time", and quit....

It was kind of like when I was IB Chemistry in HS, I didn't understand a damn thing! But I stuck with it.... despite the fact that I failed the first two quarters I stuck with it to the end and managed to pull my grade up to a B-

YOU NEED TO JUST STICK WITH IT, MAN!

Ok, am I making any sense? I didn't think so
I can't seem to organize my thoughts to tell you what I mean... perhaps someone else can carry on from here...

EDIT: I just realized something: Had medical school been like undergrad (in terms of difficulty, etc.) would you be asking yourself the same question, "is this right for me", now?

i am sure that the answer to your last question, for most people, is 'probably not'. and you make some good points.

however, they become somewhat irrelevant when you realize that you are choosing a *lifestyle* based on this kind of stress. i think it really sinks in during medical school that the 'light at the end of the tunnel' is a.) very far off and b.) somewhat dim, depending on specialty.
it's not like if you just 'stick with it' for a semester, or a year, then you will graduate and things will get better. no, it's a matter of realizing that you have made a LIFE CHOICE that requires possibly a lot more than you thought it would.

of course med. has to mean a lot to us all, to have gotten to this point. however, 'a lot' in undergrad meant that it was worth: a summer given up to study for the MCAT, nights of the week when you couldn't go out, etc etc.

whe you start looking long-term, 'a lot' could become: permanent sleep deficit, personality changes, even marriage and family for many women (and some men).

so your question about whether people would still be doubting if med school were like undergrad doesn't really matter much- b/c the fact of the matter is, med school and being a doctor aren't like undergrad, and that lifestyle change really affects some people. i think it's perfectly valid to question your decision once the reality has sunk in.

 

[fpr85]

I figured I would be getting responses along those lines... and that's perfectly OK. I guess I'll just have to pull this thread up four years from now 😉

Medicine to me is just an amazing thing, as it is with many other people. Would it be safe to say just to try it for a year or two and if you're not satisifed with how it's going by then to call it quits?

 

[care bear]

I figured I would be getting responses along those lines... and that's perfectly OK. I guess I'll just have to pull this thread up four years from now 😉

Medicine to me is just an amazing thing, as it is with many other people. Would it be safe to say just to try it for a year or two and if you're not satisifed with how it's going by then to call it quits?

haha fpr, you seem like a nice guy. definitely an excited premed freshman, but nice nonetheless. so you did IB, huh? bet you're glad that's over with 😉

 

[PeterGriffin]

i am sure that the answer to your last question, for most people, is 'probably not'. and you make some good points.

however, they become somewhat irrelevant when you realize that you are choosing a *lifestyle* based on this kind of stress. i think it really sinks in during medical school that the 'light at the end of the tunnel' is a.) very far off and b.) somewhat dim, depending on specialty.
it's not like if you just 'stick with it' for a semester, or a year, then you will graduate and things will get better. no, it's a matter of realizing that you have made a LIFE CHOICE that requires possibly a lot more than you thought it would.

of course med. has to mean a lot to us all, to have gotten to this point. however, 'a lot' in undergrad meant that it was worth: a summer given up to study for the MCAT, nights of the week when you couldn't go out, etc etc.

whe you start looking long-term, 'a lot' could become: permanent sleep deficit, personality changes, even marriage and family for many women (and some men).

so your question about whether people would still be doubting if med school were like undergrad doesn't really matter much- b/c the fact of the matter is, med school and being a doctor aren't like undergrad, and that lifestyle change really affects some people. i think it's perfectly valid to question your decision once the reality has sunk in.

Very well put. And I have to be honest to say that some of my reservations have to do with the lifestyle that looms in my future. My lack of motivation now is already pulling me away from the 'lifestyle' specialties. But it does go way beyond just that and med school difficulty. Sure it's hard, but so were a lot of things in my academic career up to this point. This is the first time that I've actually looked to the future and started realizing that I don't really want to practice medicine.

Would it be safe to say just to try it for a year or two and if you're not satisifed with how it's going by then to call it quits?

That would be an ideal situation but unfortunately at some point you have to start thinking about money. If I were to 'stick with it' for a year or two, that would put me even deeper into debt, possibly to the point where I will feel like I have no option other than to continue with med school regardless of my own desires. My thinking right now is that I am going to try and make it through this semester and then attempt to take a leave of absence to try and get everything straightened out. If I decide medicine really is for me, then I'll still have that option. And if I find something else, I wont be that much further in debt. My biggest hurdle now is to make it through this semester.

 

[Blake]

Didn't you shadow enough to find out that medicine isn't made for you 😕

Sorry if you already explained it, my brain is kind of tired and I haven't read the whole thread. 😳

 

[Kilgorian]

The first two years suck. Hang in there.

 

[PeterGriffin]

Didn't you shadow enough to find out that medicine isn't made for you 😕

Sorry if you already explained it, my brain is kind of tired and I haven't read the whole thread. 😳

I did shadow some during undergrad and I volunteered at an ER and an ICU. The problem is that I didn't really enjoy doing any of this...I just didn't let myself come to the realization then that medicine isn't for me. Instead, I just brushed it off and kept going with tunnelvision. My goal had been medicine for so long with no true reason. I treated the shadowing and volunteering experiences kind of like organic chemistry...just another hurdle that I had to leap in order to get into med school. I really wish that I hadn't been so shortsighted in undergrad and had not focused so hard on this goal of getting into med school. I was so intent on getting in that nothing could steer me away from it.

 

[PeterGriffin]

The first two years suck. Hang in there.

Yeah, that's what I keep hearing but I don't thinkjust 'hanging in there' is the right thing to do for everyone. Like I've said before, it isn't really right now that's bothering me...I'm looking into the future and I don't see myself being an MD down the road.

But I do thank you for the encouragement none the less 😀

 

[OmahaMX80]

I don't know, I've been having thoughts as well. I wouldn't say I am sure medicine isn't for me. But I don't feel like I fit in at all. We've been in class for 5 weeks and yes I've met some people but I'm not friends with anyone. I genuinely feel like I do not belong at my school. I feel like a total outcast. So, that's probably why I'm having feelings of "is this right." Our PBL's started with cystic fibrosis, btw.

 

[twinklz]

Personally, I think the fact that you didn't like shadowing is much more indicative of whether you will enjoy a career in medicine than medical school. I mean, for most people, the first 2 years are yet another hurdle to overcome before they can actually start practicing medicine. But if you overcome this hurdle just to be stuck doing something you hate, I'd stop.

Frankly, I'm enjoying learning the basic sciences. I was an English major so everything is new to me. Now, I wish I didn't have to learn the components of a replisome but I'm fine with learning (sigh...memorizing) anatomy and biochem. I can see their applications in the future, and it excites me. I can talk to my dad about stuff I'm learning, and he can apply it to cases with his patients. It makes me feel like I'm actually taking steps towards becoming a doctor as opposed to floundering in minutia. So if you think that will help you, try to find a mentor who can add some clinical relevancy to what you're learning. (My school isn't big into PBL either...our one and only case so far was McArdler's disease.. 😕 )

 

[closertofine]

Just out of curiosity...what if you kind of enjoy learning this stuff, and you think shadowing is OK...but you don't *love* either? But there's nothing else that you would necessarily rather do?

Do you just accept (as my dad tends to say, rather annoyingly after a while) that "that's why they call it work" because it's not especially fun? I guess there are some parts that would be more fun for me than others, and maybe things will start looking up, say when we get to neuroscience...but I'm definitely having my doubts too.

So basically, is it (working as a doctor) supposed to be "fun"? Sounds like a stupid question, but I wonder...

 

[fpr85]

In the end, it's all up to you, you decide what's best, don't let any external factors (parents, relatives, etc.) affect your thoughts.

I'm sure if you stick with it you will undoubtedly find an area in medicine that interests you (especially with the near-infinite choices).

If anything, remember this: If you are unhappy with your job chances are this unhappiness will carry over into your personal life -- making your entire life a wreck. Do what works for you 👍

You never know, perhaps four years from now I may be in your very same situtation

PS: Wish me luck I have my first Biology test today 🙂

 

[care bear]

Just out of curiosity...what if you kind of enjoy learning this stuff, and you think shadowing is OK...but you don't *love* either? But there's nothing else that you would necessarily rather do?

Do you just accept (as my dad tends to say, rather annoyingly after a while) that "that's why they call it work" because it's not especially fun? I guess there are some parts that would be more fun for me than others, and maybe things will start looking up, say when we get to neuroscience...but I'm definitely having my doubts too.

So basically, is it (working as a doctor) supposed to be "fun"? Sounds like a stupid question, but I wonder...

you know, closertofine, i have come to agree. work is work. . .and yes, we should try to pick something meaningful/somewhat enjoyable that makes good use of our individual talents, but when it comes down to it, life is NOT a bed of roses. . .although there is the occasional rose growing along the side of the path 🙂

and that is why i am in medical school.

 

[hondo55]

I wanted to give my view on this all...

First to fpr85:

It is clear that you really want to go to medical school and that is your dream as you are entering college. I just want to tell you to enjoy your experience there, HAVE FUN, and do the things that you really want to do. I think what happens sometimes is people got so caught up in getting into medical school that they sometimes loose sight of the journey and rather focus on the end. Getting overly stressed out to get into schools and trying to do every single thing you can can get out of control and cause you to loose sight of your desire for medicine when you get sucked into this all. It is like the tunnel vision that Peter is talking about. It is good that you are preparing yourself for the future. I just caution you to not get so caught up in the competition that you loose sight of other important things. Getting into medical school is not easy. But if you do ok in class and try to do a few different things you will get in. Let your desires lead your college life and not the competition to get into schools. In the end you will be rewarded....

To Peter and the rest:

I can identify with Peter. I had the same kind of tunnel vision that you mentioned. One gets so focused on getting in that it can be all consuming. Even when you identify when you should look into other things, and come to the conclusion that medicine isnt right, it is very difficult to leave. You want to stick out more time, but at the same time you are unhappy and look at the financial component.

I think it comes down to making a decision that is right for you. I am still trying to figure this out as I just started med 1.

 

[JJ1020]

I wanted to give my view on this all...

First to fpr85:

It is clear that you really want to go to medical school and that is your dream as you are entering college. I just want to tell you to enjoy your experience there, HAVE FUN, and do the things that you really want to do. I think what happens sometimes is people got so caught up in getting into medical school that they sometimes loose sight of the journey and rather focus on the end. Getting overly stressed out to get into schools and trying to do every single thing you can can get out of control and cause you to loose sight of your desire for medicine when you get sucked into this all. It is like the tunnel vision that Peter is talking about. It is good that you are preparing yourself for the future. I just caution you to not get so caught up in the competition that you loose sight of other important things. Getting into medical school is not easy. But if you do ok in class and try to do a few different things you will get in. Let your desires lead your college life and not the competition to get into schools. In the end you will be rewarded....

To Peter and the rest:

I can identify with Peter. I had the same kind of tunnel vision that you mentioned. One gets so focused on getting in that it can be all consuming. Even when you identify when you should look into other things, and come to the conclusion that medicine isnt right, it is very difficult to leave. You want to stick out more time, but at the same time you are unhappy and look at the financial component.

I think it comes down to making a decision that is right for you. I am still trying to figure this out as I just started med 1.

To Hondo55 and Peter (OP):
I just came across this post and I would love if I can get some advice/comment from you about what happened from then till now. I've recently just faced the same problem that were mentioned in your posts and I was hoping to see how you handled this situation. Since this post was 2 months ago, I hope to hear from you soon...if so I'll continue with my situation...Thanks ahead of time.

 

[PeterGriffin]

To Hondo55 and Peter (OP):
I just came across this post and I would love if I can get some advice/comment from you about what happened from then till now. I've recently just faced the same problem that were mentioned in your posts and I was hoping to see how you handled this situation. Since this post was 2 months ago, I hope to hear from you soon...if so I'll continue with my situation...Thanks ahead of time.

I haven't really done anything specific to deal with the situation...I've just stuck with it and am trying to make it through the first semester. We have less than a week of classes left and then exams so I've made it this far. Over Christmas break I'm going to evaluate things and make a decision. Right now it appears that I will stick with it, but I still have uncertainties and am not sure that I will ultimately stay in med school. I'm just trying to not make any rash decisions and give as much effort to this while I'm here. If I decide to leave, I'll leave knowing that I gave it a shot. My biggest problem is still a lack of motivation.