Like I said, I didn't come up with (most) of it. But you bet your sweet cheeks I laughed my ass off. This gem goes out to my GI attending. The other student on our service didn't find it funny either and now this thread has got me thinking about types of med students. Yes boys and girls, not just a one dimensional thread. Spoiler, it will contain more poop. It might also contain the most useful advice to all incoming med students
Poop Elitest. These are the ones that constantly think they are somehow superior to everyone. The very term poop offends them and how dare you use it in front of them. These are also the ones on rotations that will avoid doing any work that they feel is underserving of their genius. They tend to want to be neurodermatorocket scientist and consider everything else to be a failure. Attending and residents hate them.
Poop corrector: These aholes are the ones that will raise their hand and correct your professor that the correct term is feces. These people are usually good for a good facepalm every now and then, but are generally avoided. Then create threads on SDN about why nobody likes them. Buzzkills and gunners.
Poop throwers: These are your daredevil poopers. The ones that cram at the last minute. They fly by the seat of their pants. Maybe they fail the test, but they will watch that flying poop with awe and wonder. Usually fun to be around, but don't last too long. Talk to them or not, your choice. Just don't be surprised if a poop comes flying at you one day.
Poop chuckler: These people are awesome. Don't take like too seriously. Can see the humor in any situation. Fun to be around on wards. Can get along with anyone. Who cares if they aren't top of the class, its just fun to say poop
Shy poopers: you never see them. They creep in, do their business, and leave. Neither hated, but not really liked because nobody knows them.
Now for the advice for all the premeds: Say poop to everyone you meet at orientation. See if they get a twinkle in their eye and a slight upturn of the lip. Maybe a quick shoulder shrug. These people will keep you sane, unless you are a poop elitest. Then you can go poop yourself
