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Discussion in 'Psychology [Psy.D. / Ph.D.]' started by PSYDR, Nov 28, 2017.

  1. MCParent

    Faculty Bronze Donor Classifieds Approved

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    One could also use this as a chance to call in, not call out. We liberals have this bizarre obsession with being the most liberal of all the liberals, and a part of this is acting on offense as a power move rather than having a normal human discussion. What would have been so hard for that person, supposedly an expert and hardly in an unsafe space, to just say "That's kind of a weird joke to me; can we talk for five minutes in the hall about how each of us sees a joke like that?"
    Otherwise we just become fodder for Fox News.
     
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  3. Jon Snow

    Jon Snow Senior Member

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    Exactly so.

    And, maybe in some situations in which Queen Woke is perfectly secure in her power and being, let the off color joke slide you know... because the dude is 76 and wasn’t being mean, so what’s the gain in humiliating him?
     
    #52 Jon Snow, May 9, 2018
    Last edited: May 9, 2018
  4. Sanman

    Sanman O.G.

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    Yeah, this is taking it too far. Now this guy is going to need a safe space to to discuss being an old guy that tells lame jokes. Let's never make a joke to strangers now. I've had people offend my sensibilities before and am an ethnic minority. Speak up or let it go and walk away. This is just silly. I would give up my membership before apologizing.

    Ironically, I am more offended that this professor is in Women's studies. Apologize to me and rename it gender studies.
     
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  5. erg923

    erg923 Regional Clinical Officer, Cenpatico National

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    We just just ban Lingerie.
     
  6. WisNeuro

    WisNeuro Board Certified Neuropsychologist
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    You shut your ***** mouth!
     
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  7. erg923

    erg923 Regional Clinical Officer, Cenpatico National

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    Seriously, the most disturbing part of all this is how immature response to the "offense" was. At least have the gumption to tell me to my face that you're upset instead of telling mommy and daddy on me. Good grief.
     
  8. mypointlesspov

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    I think the worst part of all of this is that the joke wasn't even good.
     
  9. Sanman

    Sanman O.G.

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    Well that's the thing, isn't it? You only get in trouble if the joke doesn't land.
     
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  10. erg923

    erg923 Regional Clinical Officer, Cenpatico National

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    I would have to assume, based on the phasing of the comment, that it was repetition of a joke from the old British TV show "Are you being Served" in which a man, when asked where he is wanting to go, jokes about going to the ladies lingerie floor. The punchline being the "irony" and satire of be being a man and would not really being going there (i.e .sarcasm). I wouldn't expect people to instantly recognize this, and it may have poor joke judgement on his part, but to make this some kind of ridiculous #mettoo moment is ludicrous and undermines the whole issue of subtle misogyny in our culture, which I agree is real.
     
  11. MCParent

    Faculty Bronze Donor Classifieds Approved

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    I see her misogyny claim and raise her heterosexist/gender-ist, appearance-ist, and ageist assumption that the 76 year old guy is NOT interested in purchasing women's lingerie for himself. And down the rabbit hole we go.
     
  12. Therapist4Chnge

    Therapist4Chnge Neuropsych Ninja Faculty
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    The only thing that will stop a bad old guy with a bad joke....is a good old guy with a worse joke.

    This logic is sadly not pure fiction.
     
  13. Jon Snow

    Jon Snow Senior Member

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    At that age? Yes. I think the answer would be some variant of “go f yourselves.”
     
  14. Jon Snow

    Jon Snow Senior Member

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    Yes. By blurring lines to this extent, you get into a space where it’s harassment when it’s perceived as not funny or the person telling the joke is not attractive.

    Personally, with people you don’t know in any situation that could be construed as work related, it’s probably best practice not to make any sort of political or sex related jokes. Though, in academia you can probably get a way with trump/republican jokes...


    Even switching between colleges can be interesting culturally. I usually function in medical and engineering spaces. I was recently talking to a group of humanities types and it was pretty clear to me that my normal operating mode would be perceived as too aggressive and it would be interpreted through the lens of my sex/race. And, that’s just dispositional, not content related.

    I think the problem is about power differential and the perception of power differential. I don't think we want to venture into a space where people are basically walking on eggshells around each other. And, call-outs for social blunders = career ending controversy.
     
    #63 Jon Snow, May 10, 2018
    Last edited: May 10, 2018
  15. PSYDR

    PSYDR Psychologist

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    I just assumed that the profession that focused on the individual would you know...

    try to help an individual cope with some people just being jerks or insensitive. Kinda thought that trying to change society as a whole was another discipline.
     
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  17. ClinicalABA

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    I have a few opinions on this..

    1) men should prabably avoid talking about underwear with woman on elevators, even if meant as a joke. Just plain better for everyone that way. Stare forward and step off when the door opens on your floor.
    2) this should have dealt with informally and directly, in the form of “I don’t like that joke” or “don’t talk about underwear in enclosed spaces with women you don’t know- it could make them uncomfortable.

    This reeks of “point proving” rather than an honest reaction meant to right a wrong and address a truly unsafe situation.

    I was speaking to my wife about this this morning. She leans HEAVILY to left on such issues (she’s got a degree in woman’s studies from the college in Amherst that isn’t UMass or Amherst College) and she was kinda pissed by this, making the point that this woman’s response sends a message that woman are so weak that they can’t deal with a stupid (and harmless) joke from an old man without feeling vulnerable.
     
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  18. erg923

    erg923 Regional Clinical Officer, Cenpatico National

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    The "joke" was not about underwear. This was misplaced satire that in any other year people would have had the common sense to either ignore or make a passing comment about "some goofy dude" on on elevator they were on with once.

    Good God, whatever happened to good stories?! My family lives in Cincii, and this is would be one of many good Thanksgiving stories to tell about your goofy or ****ed up neighborhood in which you lived. Its a new age and such, but let get real here folks!
     
  19. ClinicalABA

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    If you don’t get the joke, it’s just a weird dude talking about underwear (lingerie=underwear). Otherwise I agree with you- this should just be a story about some weird old guy in an elevator.
     
  20. Jon Snow

    Jon Snow Senior Member

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    Not even a good story.

    ... and then...

    ...then what?

    The old guy told a joke that was decades out of date. Oh, and he said the word, lingerie.

    Reaction....
     
  21. MCParent

    Faculty Bronze Donor Classifieds Approved

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    It’s also worth noting that harassment is pretty much universally defined as a repetitive behavior. Eg why asking a coworker out once is not harassment. But, universities consistently believe that their little honor courts can act however they want.
     
  22. Jon Snow

    Jon Snow Senior Member

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    Ah. The title ix courts? Yeah that’s ah!t show.

    In this case, I get the one crazy person reporting someone for a joke. But, the organization then trying to punish the guy is truly mind boggling.
     
  23. WisNeuro

    WisNeuro Board Certified Neuropsychologist
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  24. MCParent

    Faculty Bronze Donor Classifieds Approved

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  25. Pragma

    Pragma Neuropsychologist
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    Agreed. Been on those before.
     
  26. WisNeuro

    WisNeuro Board Certified Neuropsychologist
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    I'm bored. Entertain me, SDN denizens.
     
  27. psych.meout

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  28. WisNeuro

    WisNeuro Board Certified Neuropsychologist
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    Meh, we see the appalling on a daily/weekly basis. I am not entertained.
     
  29. PSYDR

    PSYDR Psychologist

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    I'm thinking of going somewhere for the weekend, got any suggestions?
     
  30. ClinicalABA

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  31. ClinicalABA

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    If you were here you’d see that i am putting a toy on my head, acting like I can’t find it, then pretending to sneeze and acting surprised when it falls into my lap.
     
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  32. Sanman

    Sanman O.G.

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    What billing code is that under?
     
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  33. ClinicalABA

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    Usually part of a 90791 or 96118:D
     
  34. MamaPhD

    MamaPhD Psychologist, Academic Medical Center
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    Funny, I've always taken @PSYDR for a west coast guy for some reason.
     
  35. Jon Snow

    Jon Snow Senior Member

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  36. WisNeuro

    WisNeuro Board Certified Neuropsychologist
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    Good to know that they don't condone the most efficacious form of therapy for PTSD. Although the military and VA also pay for EMDR and acupuncture. For organizations that were supposedly leading the charge with EBT/ESTs, they've taken a huge step back in eschewing what works for a variety of placebos.
     
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  37. Pragma

    Pragma Neuropsychologist
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    The military will now give you an ipad so that you can do your “EBT” at home! Thanks Verizon!
     
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  38. psych.meout

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    That's not true. Just look at all these studies supporting the efficacy of paying a veteran's spouse to be their caregiver:
     
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  39. Jon Snow

    Jon Snow Senior Member

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