Good days, bad days?

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needadvicebadly

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I'm a month into intern year and it feels like some days I f-up a ton of stuff, my presentations suck, and I'm getting nit picked for everything. Other days, I feel good, the attending seems to agree with most of what I'm saying, and I actually feel like I can do this stuff. It can be so hit or miss, seemingly alternating between good/bad days multiple times a week. Anyone else out there experience this?

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Sounds about right.

You'll later appreciate that your ability to "f-up a ton of stuff" wasn't nearly as great as imagined at the time.

You're supposed to suck right now. Everyone expects you too. Just keep soaking it all in and you'll be surprised how much you learn.
 
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Intern year is really hard. At some point around 9-12 months from now, though, you will look back and be stunned by how much you have grown.
 
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I had the pleasure of one attending who specifically told us to practice, and that to not worry, he'd catch our screw ups and that was his job to do so. Granted its rare to have an attending bluntly tell you that to relieve your apprehension about current status of learning in training process. But do what you can to present your thought process of what/why you are thinking what you are and why you are proposing the treatment.

Then if you have more silent staff docs, who don't teach, prompt them with questions. Even the 'weaker' and less inclined to teach staff have kernels buried in the years of experience that can be extracted. Strike up conversations and try to glean where to focus your questions. It may actually not be so much in assessment / treatment, but perhaps in hospital politics, or private practice, etc.

In summary, be proactive and ask questions, put your vulnerabilities and thought process out there, and extract as much learning as you can.

Caution: when you stumble across the stronger personalities who want things done a particular way, just do it. And when the time is right strike up the conversation of why they want it done that way. Or when asking if they have evidence to support their quirk, phrase in way that you want to build up your collection of journal articles for future reference.
 
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