Hate telling other people I’m premed, especially other premeds

[Anthodite]

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I’m going back to college for a bachelors after getting an applied associates. Most premeds I met as soon I said “oh I’m premed too” seemed sad for me that it wasn’t my intended plan when I started college.

I’m obviously a couple years older but I feel like every time I mention it they try to ask questions to gauge how old I am. And then go “oh you need 3 more years for a bachelors?”

Then eventually comes to them questioning me and my sanity. “Why premed, why not PA school it’s shorter?” I COULD ASK THEM THE SAME.

Most family, friends, professors and others are supportive besides the occasional “yikes that will take a while”. But traditional premeds have been asking about my ECs, why MD/DO?, and GPA almost as if they’re interviewing me.

Feeling like I should keep being a premed a secret from other premeds because I don’t like how toxic they can be. I’ve met a few cool ones here and there but I really don’t like the pity most of them have for me.

 

[Nontrad_FL_LGBT]

People seem to think you die when you're 40 or something based on the age questions. It is kind of absurd and silly. I could see raising an eyebrow for a 45 yo applicant but 20s-30s? Nah. I have multiple PhDs, PharmDs, PAs, and Vet MDs in my class, sometimes it takes a while to narrow in even after commiting to a professional field.

Average matriculation age is like 26 now, they're the abnormal ones for going straight through.

 

[wysdoc]

I’m going back to college for a bachelors after getting an applied associates. Most premeds I met as soon I said “oh I’m premed too” seemed sad for me that it wasn’t my intended plan when I started college.

I’m obviously a couple years older but I feel like every time I mention it they try to ask questions to gauge how old I am. And then go “oh you need 3 more years for a bachelors?”

Then eventually comes to them questioning me and my sanity. “Why premed, why not PA school it’s shorter?” I COULD ASK THEM THE SAME.

Most family, friends, professors and others are supportive besides the occasional “yikes that will take a while”. But traditional premeds have been asking about my ECs, why MD/DO?, and GPA almost as if they’re interviewing me.

Feeling like I should keep being a premed a secret from other premeds because I don’t like how toxic they can be. I’ve met a few cool ones here and there but I really don’t like the pity most of them have for me.

Say you are a biology major instead. They will still say ew that’s hard, but don’t care what they think.

 

[ClashRoyaleKing]

I get it. Dealing with "the talk" and the questions that came with it during undergrad was annoying. No, I do not know which doctor I want to be. Yes, I plan on applying across the United States and not within a 5-mile radius of where I live (people think all undergrads have medical schools?), yes I know that it is long, no I don't want to be a PA, yes I'm busy doing activities.

It has been even worse as a reapplicant too. "Why aren't you in medical school?" "Aren't you supposed to be in Tennessee?" (referencing my interview at Belmont), "What are you doing now?" etc.

Best of luck in undergrad, OP!

 

[Anthodite]

Say you are a biology major instead. They will still say ew that’s hard, but don’t care what they think.

Omg I did once and I got a "Oh you're doing a masters?" to a gen chem classmate. I wanted to disappear right on the spot

 

[Crayola227]

Haha well they're immature. It doesn't get better. Often the worst of them are very focused and will go to med school with you. You will be dealing with these types the rest of your career 🤣

Where it does get better I guess is when you are all attendings. It becomes less obvious who started when. And people do chill out somewhat with age.

Not sure if you're a woman? In any case, it is very relevant when you start what is at minimum about a decade of training. It all snowballs. There's advantages of being non-trad of course, but timewise, energy, financially, family wise, it is somewhat relevant.

Try not to get you down. In life we all run our own race. That would probably be my response to these kids. It'll mean nothing to them now, but it puts a smile on my face knowing one day, maybe even 10 years from now, they'll have thar moment of "oh, yeah...."

 

[Dral]

Just tell them you did rads work to get clinical experience and now you're finishing up requirements to go.

If you are a bio major and they're premed major, shoot back to them what they will do with a pre-med major if they don't get into med school.

Most importantly stop caring what others think about you if you aren't doing something wrong. I can tell you from experience that if you let it show you are self-conscious about being older, people will pick up on it and go with it. Just let it go and it more likely becomes a non-issue.

 

[Crayola227]

I was a chem major, so I guess when people tell me they were a bio major my reaction has never been "Ew that's hard" 🤣

Also what idiot gets a "pre-med" major? That's the silliest thing I've ever heard. Underwater basketweaving at least says you have a skill to do something.

Also it's fine not to tell people you're pre-med. It's not anyone's business but yours. I have a relative that was a top executive of a major company and at age 40 and while still working, did night classes for their pre-reqs. We were never told they were pre-med until they had an acceptance in hand. Probably sidestepped a lot of "wtf are you doing" comments.

 

[PB2464]

I’m going back to college for a bachelors after getting an applied associates. Most premeds I met as soon I said “oh I’m premed too” seemed sad for me that it wasn’t my intended plan when I started college.

I’m obviously a couple years older but I feel like every time I mention it they try to ask questions to gauge how old I am. And then go “oh you need 3 more years for a bachelors?”

Then eventually comes to them questioning me and my sanity. “Why premed, why not PA school it’s shorter?” I COULD ASK THEM THE SAME.

Most family, friends, professors and others are supportive besides the occasional “yikes that will take a while”. But traditional premeds have been asking about my ECs, why MD/DO?, and GPA almost as if they’re interviewing me.

Feeling like I should keep being a premed a secret from other premeds because I don’t like how toxic they can be. I’ve met a few cool ones here and there but I really don’t like the pity most of them have for me.

Why do you care what they think? Really. This isn't some reality TV show where interpersonal relationships affect your outcome.
A lot of us had been through this but came out the other side laughing about it. And now it's a damn cool story.
Also, don't go the PA route. You'll be wishing you knew more and more pleased with your income. Just stay frugal and it works out.

 

[MusicDOc124]

Why even care?

 

[Crayola227]

Eh, I mean, I get it. It's not a positive human interaction. It happens. More than one way to deal.

 

[Hollow Knight]

I don't want to minimize your feelings because honestly, I hated most of the premeds in undergrad, and they are indeed toxic.

At the same time..... lots of people in this line of work are toxic. If I had a nickel for every time an attending/resident/med student told me that FM docs were fake doctors, I could pay my loans off. It is what it is. You have to learn to do this for yourself and let the insults roll off your back (something about water and ducks or something)

Besides, those college kids are just showing their own lack of wisdom. You should spend your life doing what fulfills you. Who cares what your age is?

 

[deleted1197125]

I’m going back to college for a bachelors after getting an applied associates. Most premeds I met as soon I said “oh I’m premed too” seemed sad for me that it wasn’t my intended plan when I started college.

I’m obviously a couple years older but I feel like every time I mention it they try to ask questions to gauge how old I am. And then go “oh you need 3 more years for a bachelors?”

Then eventually comes to them questioning me and my sanity. “Why premed, why not PA school it’s shorter?” I COULD ASK THEM THE SAME.

Most family, friends, professors and others are supportive besides the occasional “yikes that will take a while”. But traditional premeds have been asking about my ECs, why MD/DO?, and GPA almost as if they’re interviewing me.

Feeling like I should keep being a premed a secret from other premeds because I don’t like how toxic they can be. I’ve met a few cool ones here and there but I really don’t like the pity most of them have for me.

If you hate telling people you’re pre med… then just stop telling people you’re pre med….?

 

[BeGladNonTrad]

I was a chem major, so I guess when people tell me they were a bio major my reaction has never been "Ew that's hard" 🤣

Also what idiot gets a "pre-med" major? That's the silliest thing I've ever heard. Underwater basketweaving at least says you have a skill to do something.

Also it's fine not to tell people you're pre-med. It's not anyone's business but yours. I have a relative that was a top executive of a major company and at age 40 and while still working, did night classes for their pre-reqs. We were never told they were pre-med until they had an acceptance in hand. Probably sidestepped a lot of "wtf are you doing" comments.

haha. My family still doesn't know. Only telling friends and people I date, so I don't feel like I'm hiding stuff they might consider important.

 

[MissDoctorLady]

I haven't really told many that I'm pre-med either. 🤐

I can't stand negative unsolicited advice so I do my best to prevent it. I only tell ppl on a need to know basis and even then I tell them "I'm in school", "taking some classes" "figuring it out" or "getting my masters in biochem" -- they don't need to know it's an SMP. I get real vague with their follow-up questions and they generally drop it. You don't have to share your plans with everyone and you have little to explain for their own curiosity.

The way I see it is, I have a good 40 or so years to work. So, I should do what I'm passionate about - all other opinions are immaterial. Don't let them get into your head. You will be very regretful in the future if you let other's words limit you.