Help......please

[ChandutheMagici]

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Let me preface this by saying that I am extremely grateful that I have a spot in medical school and I'm not about to quit. Also, seeing physicians in their respective fields let's me know that this is where I want to be. That being said, are any of you non-trads as disinterested in med-school as I am right now?

Last semester, after being so bored with studying the most uninteresting material on the planet, I took to intuitively guessing on the last two physiology exams (granted, I was a phys major). I find that nothing I try makes it more interesting. I went to class, but the teachers are worse than watching an IRS tax seminar (I'm convinced most of them would be fired in the private sector). Then, I studied on my own. However, after I get through the first 20 pages of an all text course booklet I find myself day dreaming about what it will be like to actually be treating patients. Now I do a combination of study on my own/ group study. This is okay, but I'm still seriously lacking motivation.

I really need a reason why I'm doing something and no one (including myself) can seem to give me one.

1. "Get an A" is a common, but unfortunately something I could care less about.
2. "Do it for your future patients" makes me laugh considering that any of the clinical skills professors (most of whom seem to be very competent and compassionate physicians) I've asked a basic science question have no idea what the hell I'm talking about.
3. "Just get through" is all I can seem to muster currently.

I'm doing fine in school (Didn't have to remediate anything, fall within the Bell curve), but every morning I wake to find myself more and more irritated that I have to memorize a new batch of science trivia. I feel like I'm getting dumber with each day that passes. Memorizing all this crap is mind numbing. And yeah, I'm complaining, but I feel I'm starting to get depressed that this is my life currently. Does anyone else feel this way or felt this way in the past? If so, can you provide some suggestions or coping strategies (I'm being serious) to help? I'm hoping that by posting in the nontrad forum I can get some serious replies without sarcasm.

 

[QofQuimica]

Chandu, you are definitely not alone. I think everyone goes through a phase where they just hate med school. Let's face it: if you're the kind of person who loves problem-solving, memorizing anatomy and biochemical pathways ain't gonna be your thing. It wasn't my thing either. And the best advice I can give you is exactly what whomever told you to just suck it up and get through it told you. If it makes you feel any better, my experience has been that first year is the worst in this respect. I found second year to be much less intellectually painful than first year. The volume is larger, but the material is more interesting and clinically relevant.

The other thing I would suggest is that you find a way to get some clinical experience in this year if your school doesn't already require it of you. Find a physician in a specialty you think you might want to go into, and ask if you can spend some time in their clinic or going on rounds with them. That will help remind you on a more tangible level why it's worth slogging through all this memorization and regurgitation.

Hang in there, and as long as you're passing comfortably, don't beat yourself up over not loving every minute of med school.

 

[sindadel]

I wish I could be more helpful, but I am very fortunately at a med school with a clinically oriented curriculum. I just about poked my eyeballs out taking biochem last year, so I absolutely know where you're coming from.

Maybe look up clinical relevance of what you're learning to remind yourself of why you're there. Shadowing is a great idea. Get involved in some student groups who are doing clinical stuff. Read some light journal articles about clinical practice - like guidelines for managing diabetes patients etc.

I'm so sorry you're miserable. 🙁

 

[NTF]

I feel your pain. I agree with Q that finding your own way to get clinical experience is a good way to push your way through studying.

I started volunteering at the student-run clinic here and it definitely helped improve my mood. It's about as close as an M1 can get to doing what we'll do in M3. Actually since I've stream-lined my study habits I've been trying to get as much time in clinical settings as possible. Been doing shadowing which has been more fun as a med student than a pre-med (they actually want to show you how to do stuff). Also joined a child-life special arts program at children's hospital so I can spend some more time with patients. Getting those weekly reminders of what'll lie ahead are nice. Another plus is that everytime I ask an M3 if things are better now than in pre-clinical they all say, "Oh god yes."

So yeah, I feel ya bro.

 

[dragonfly99]

Yes, have been there, done that.
Just suck it up and get through.
Yes, the teaching in medical school sucked...I was surprised by that also. Also surprised by the amount of rote memorization versus actual thinking. Don't totally slack because some of the stuff you might actually use later.

Try to get to know some clinical faculty in area(s) you might be interested in. This actually could help your future career.

Your grades in 1st/2nd year don't matter as much as 3rd year grades. You don't want to suck, but as long as you're at least average, your USMLE scores and 3rd year grades will likely matter a lot more when you are trying to get a residency match later.

 

[ChandutheMagici]

Just wanted to thank you for all the advice. I contacted CIM (Community Integrated Medicine) and I'm going to be helping out there. I also called my old doctor patient relationship professor (who I became friends with) and he said to show up whenever I want.

I'm pretty sure I was having a moment of insanity last night. After reading through your guys' posts it was good to know that I wasn't alone in how I felt.

Thanks again,

Chandu

 

[QofQuimica]

Just wanted to thank you for all the advice. I contacted CIM (Community Integrated Medicine) and I'm going to be helping out there. I also called my old doctor patient relationship professor (who I became friends with) and he said to show up whenever I want.

I'm pretty sure I was having a moment of insanity last night. After reading through your guys' posts it was good to know that I wasn't alone in how I felt.

Thanks again,

Chandu

Hey, that's what virtual friends are for. 😉

Seriously, Chandu, spending some time in the clinic will do wonders for your outlook.

 

[riverjib]

My fiance is in PA school, and he truly hated the first year and a half. I mean that--he HATED it. He complained incessantly about pathophysiology and even some of the clinical skills courses he was taking. Mind you, he had a 3.9+ GPA, including BCPMs for med school, in case he changed his mind.

He's starting clinical rotations this May, and his clinical skills courses are practical now. He loves it. He's like a different person these days. I always knew he had talent and clinical intuition, but I genuinely worried about his well-being before this semester. I was bracing myself for another long semester, but he's passed the threshold...he's finally seeing the practical applications of what he has learned.

Hold on a little longer. It will get better. Some med students really enjoy the basic science aspect of the curriculum, but for most, it's a means to an end. In some med schools, you're in the ED taking H&P's during your first semester. In others, you don't talk to a real patient until your third year. Just assimilate the information you need to pass Step 1, and know that brighter days are ahead. Make friends with your classmates (the positive ones). It'll help pass the time.

 

[WannabeaMD]

Think of it as somenthing temporal. . .Somenthing you must go through to move on.
Good luck.

 

[ChandutheMagici]

Again, tks for all the good answers and empathy. It's just good to know that I'm not the only one who feels this way.

I took your advice Q and Fogie, I start at a family practice clinic next week. 4 hours a week of clinic stuff, can't wait. My wife is also signing me up for Judo class (I used to be a wrestler). She seems to think beating someone up might be just what I need.

 

[sindadel]

Sounds awesome!