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- Aug 11, 2013
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I just graduated UC Berkeley with a 3.19 in Molecular and Cell Biology. I've been studying for the MCAT that I'm sitting for on 7/18 (next Saturday) at 8am since 5/20 when I graduated. I've been a super stressed out, high strung and nervous person when it comes to test taking ever since getting a D in Calculus at Cal my freshman year and had to repeat the course. I got an (780 on the Sat II Math and 5 on the AP AB test so I'm not completely incompetent, I just have serious problems concentrating and focusing when it matters most).
I'm getting really nervous about taking my test next Saturday and feel bad because I told my parents (the people I'm living with) that I'm committed to taking the test. I also sat for the MCAT on January 30th but voided my score because I had a nervous breakdown in the middle of the test and only prepared for the four weeks over winter break for the test. I'm REALLY going to piss off my parents if I bail again for the July18th test because I moved it from June 20th to give myself more time but I haven't been using my time effectively or efficiently I guess.
I honestly think something is seriously wrong with me because I'm having such a hard time focusing and feel like I'm always paranoid that I'm going to get a passage that tests me on my weaknesses and that I'm going to perform poorly and do badly.
It honestly sucks how crippling my anxiety about take the mcat is and I desperately need some tips. I get exercise, sleep 8 hours a night, eat well and starting today am disconnected from all distraction i.e. social media, facebook, snapchat . I can't figure out what my root problem is! I'm sitting in the library now dreading returning to my online practice test because testing is such a miserable experience for me.
Is there any hope for me? I feel so alone and isolated like I'm the only person I know going through this experience. I don't have anybody to study with and didn't to a good job at making friends with my classmates while at Cal because the academic environment was so stressful. I don't have any resources, peers, friends, mentors and people I can just talk to!
I play chess, piano, soccer and workout for fun. I'm thinking about going on a backpacking trip with my some old highschool friends on July 19th after my test since they invited me.
I'm also experiencing a lot of mental frustration and cognitive dissonance of sorts because I still remain relatively close with my highschool friends who were not high achievers like I was. I think my closeness with them has affected my academic performance throughout college and now I have to pay for being a nice and carrying person who didn't abandon his friends.
I wish I could just abandon them and forget we were ever friends because they like to go out and party and drink and smoke and I quit smoking in highschool and have had 2 drinks since graduating in May. I seriously am trying to get my life together and just want my life to start working out the way it is supposed to. I'm getting weird looks from people in the library because I'm typing so furiously and look sort of maniacal in my demeanor.
I'm looking for support. I want to support others and be support by them.
Sorry for the post. I know you don't have time to read my bull**** but it's genuine and sincere. I'm not lying or bull****ting anybody. More than anything I just want to get well and focus all my energy and attention on passing the mcat.
I'm getting really nervous about taking my test next Saturday and feel bad because I told my parents (the people I'm living with) that I'm committed to taking the test. I also sat for the MCAT on January 30th but voided my score because I had a nervous breakdown in the middle of the test and only prepared for the four weeks over winter break for the test. I'm REALLY going to piss off my parents if I bail again for the July18th test because I moved it from June 20th to give myself more time but I haven't been using my time effectively or efficiently I guess.
I honestly think something is seriously wrong with me because I'm having such a hard time focusing and feel like I'm always paranoid that I'm going to get a passage that tests me on my weaknesses and that I'm going to perform poorly and do badly.
It honestly sucks how crippling my anxiety about take the mcat is and I desperately need some tips. I get exercise, sleep 8 hours a night, eat well and starting today am disconnected from all distraction i.e. social media, facebook, snapchat . I can't figure out what my root problem is! I'm sitting in the library now dreading returning to my online practice test because testing is such a miserable experience for me.
Is there any hope for me? I feel so alone and isolated like I'm the only person I know going through this experience. I don't have anybody to study with and didn't to a good job at making friends with my classmates while at Cal because the academic environment was so stressful. I don't have any resources, peers, friends, mentors and people I can just talk to!
I play chess, piano, soccer and workout for fun. I'm thinking about going on a backpacking trip with my some old highschool friends on July 19th after my test since they invited me.
I'm also experiencing a lot of mental frustration and cognitive dissonance of sorts because I still remain relatively close with my highschool friends who were not high achievers like I was. I think my closeness with them has affected my academic performance throughout college and now I have to pay for being a nice and carrying person who didn't abandon his friends.
I wish I could just abandon them and forget we were ever friends because they like to go out and party and drink and smoke and I quit smoking in highschool and have had 2 drinks since graduating in May. I seriously am trying to get my life together and just want my life to start working out the way it is supposed to. I'm getting weird looks from people in the library because I'm typing so furiously and look sort of maniacal in my demeanor.
I'm looking for support. I want to support others and be support by them.
Sorry for the post. I know you don't have time to read my bull**** but it's genuine and sincere. I'm not lying or bull****ting anybody. More than anything I just want to get well and focus all my energy and attention on passing the mcat.
