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Hospital Chart bloopers...

Discussion in 'Pre-Medical - MD' started by masterMood, Dec 10, 2005.

  1. masterMood

    masterMood Membership Revoked
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    READ TIL THE END.....
    Read till the end, excerpted from website:


    HOSPITAL CHART BLOOPERS>>

    Actual WRITING from hospital charts:

    1.The patient refused autopsy.

    2.The patient has no previous history of suicide.

    3.Pt. has left white blood cells at another hospital.

    4.NOTE: Patient here recovering from forehead cut. Patient became very angry when

    given an enema by mistake.

    5.Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

    6.On the second day the knee was better, & on the 3rd day it disappeared.

    7.The patient is tearful & crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

    8.The patient has been depressed since he began seeing me in 1993.

    9.Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

    10.Healthy appearing 69 year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.

    11. Patient had waffles for breakfast & anorexia for lunch.

    12.She is numb from her toes down.

    13. While in ER, she was examined,x-rated & sent home.

    14.The skin was moist & dry.

    15.Occasional,constant infrequent headaches.

    16.Pt. was alert & unresponsive

    17.rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

    18.She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.

    19.I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.

    20.Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

    21.The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

    22.Skin: somewhat pale but present

    23.Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
     
  2. Indryd

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    lol
     
  3. Psycho Doctor

    Psycho Doctor *** Angel
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    :laugh: :laugh: those were great!
     
  4. DrZee

    DrZee Happy as Hell
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    I once heard a patient say his doctor told him he had "leaches in his brain":eek:

    (the doctor had said "lesions")

    Oh, another one, Doctor had dictated that "the patient has trash in his mouth"

    (oral thrush)
     
  5. jbone

    jbone Herro!
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    #4 is a classic. :laugh: :laugh:
     
  6. medicalbound

    medicalbound Senior Member
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    "pt has FHx of sick as hell anemia"
     
  7. DrZee

    DrZee Happy as Hell
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    :laugh:
     
  8. 45408

    45408 aw buddy
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    circus sized, eh?
     
  9. masterMood

    masterMood Membership Revoked
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    it's fo' da shortiez...

    [​IMG]
     

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