How can I "gracefully" back out of volunteer work without making them any more disappointed or angrier with me? Allow me to explain . . .

[peregrino]

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I am looking for advice on how to back out of long-term (20 year) medical/surgical volunteer work in Mexico. While I have enjoyed the work, I can no longer afford the missed work and study time and missed money (from not working while I am abroad). More importantly, I am preparing to take the MCAT, and I need the time to study and to save money for MCAT and medical school application fees. Lastly, volunteering is no longer fun anymore; it has become a burden.

However, I know that leaving this group is going to upset lots of people at the Mexico project, both administrators and patients. It already has; in preparing for finals last semester, I took time away from volunteering and was chastized for it. My potential leaving comes at a difficult time for this group as the nurse boss lady may need to take a leave of medical absence and is expecting me to take over for her in March. Unfortunately, I really am the only person who has the expertise and the experience to do what she has been doing. Furthermore, I also do not want to jeopardize my chances of getting a decent letter of recommendation from this group or the boss lady.

Can anyone advise me on how to gracefully back out of my volunteer work without upsetting anyone more than they are already?
And how can I guarantee that I can get that LOR and that it will be a decent one?

Thanks.

 

[deleted1001426]

it’s a volunteer position so it’s something you do when time permits. give decent notice, explain how you have other binding commitments and yoi feel that you can’t continue to make time for volunteering there and then leave. Some will understand, others will be petty/ pig headed and hold it against you.
IMO if they aren’t willing to write you a LOR despite leaving for a legitimate reason after all this time then they don’t know/like you enough to write a strong LOR so you’re not missing out on much

 

[Moko]

I am looking for advice on how to back out of long-term (20 year) medical/surgical volunteer work in Mexico. While I have enjoyed the work, I can no longer afford the missed work and study time and missed money (from not working while I am abroad). More importantly, I am preparing to take the MCAT, and I need the time to study and to save money for MCAT and medical school application fees. Lastly, volunteering is no longer fun anymore; it has become a burden.

However, I know that leaving this group is going to upset lots of people at the Mexico project, both administrators and patients. It already has; in preparing for finals last semester, I took time away from volunteering and was chastized for it. My potential leaving comes at a difficult time for this group as the nurse boss lady may need to take a leave of medical absence and is expecting me to take over for her in March. Unfortunately, I really am the only person who has the expertise and the experience to do what she has been doing. Furthermore, I also do not want to jeopardize my chances of getting a decent letter of recommendation from this group or the boss lady.

Can anyone advise me on how to gracefully back out of my volunteer work without upsetting anyone more than they are already?
And how can I guarantee that I can get that LOR and that it will be a decent one?

Thanks.

Not sure if you meant to write 2 instead of 20 years, but regardless, you're a volunteer and should not feel compelled to keep volunteering if it's no longer satisfying. Give them advanced notice of your plans to leave, offer to help train someone else to take over your job, and ask for a letter. Don't be afraid to ditch the letter if your Spidey senses start tingling. Good luck

 

[Bonne Nuit]

Could you ask for the LOR before you announce your departure? You can have your letter writer upload it to a service like Interfolio, where it can be held until you’re ready to apply.

 

[Osteosaur]

Disgusting.

If you are essential you should be a paid employee. If you've been at this 20 years there should be someone who loves you. Get a letter from THEM. (but as I've been told academic letters trump volunteer coordinator fluff). If these a**holes don't appreciate the time you've given (20 years!?) I don't know what to say. This may be painful to hear but if these ingrate cockroaches are not supportive of your endeavors after all this time, I would not trust any LOR they might produce. If there is someone you trust by all means ask them, of course.

I am just sorry you're working with ingrates who don't appreciate your work and feel entitled to your time. But I am not shocked...

 

[peregrino]

Thanks for all your help so far.

Not sure if you meant to write 2 instead of 20 years, but regardless, you're a volunteer and should not feel compelled to keep volunteering if it's no longer satisfying.

Yes, it has been 20 years. I should have left there a long time ago, finished my prerequisites, and then went off to medical school. I would be a physician now. Staying not only delayed medical school but also ruined my academics as well, because of the time commitment ate into my study time. I am back in school trying to do GPA grade repair and study for the MCAT. The main reason that volunteering is no longer satisfying is that I am not making progress toward being a physician/surgeon. Another reason is that volunteering keeps interfering with my studying.

Disgusting.

If you are essential you should be a paid employee. . . . Whoever chastised you don't ask them.

Most of us are volunteers. Unfortunately, the person who loves me the most and who would write the best LOR is the person who needs me the most and wants me to take over for her. This nurse is well-known to wheedle or chastize people into doing nice things for her and putting the project's needs over those of volunteers. The other chatisement is coming some of my fellow coordinators who are upset that I am not helping this nurse or the organization more. They consider my position crucial because I am the only coordinator with surgical experience.

I might be able to get an LOR from the surgeons or anesthesiologists under whom I work there. At least one of them still supports my desire to go to medical school.

Could you ask for the LOR before you announce your departure? You can have your letter writer upload it to a service like Interfolio, where it can be held until you’re ready to apply.

Yes, a good suggestion.