I could really use some advice...

[tattooedhearts]

Hello everybody,

I should start off by saying that I'm not new to this forum, I've been silently reading threads since I started college but have never posted. I tried looking for a thread similar to my situation but I can't find one similar enough to take advice from.

I'm a sophomore in college. I did a program in high school where I could get my Associates of Science at a community college while still in high school. I graduated from high school but I had to continue an extra semester at the cc to finish up my degree. I started off by taking science electives rather than taking pre-reqs because I heard that community college pre-reqs don't look too good to adcoms. I ended up having to take Gen Chem 1 and Bio 1 at the cc to avoid falling behind. I don't want to say that the pre req courses at the cc were easy, but for some reason I learned better there. I had all of my friends there with me and we studied together. I was comfortable and happy and did pretty well. This semester, I transferred to a very competitive four year university. I'm currently taking Gen Chem 2, Physics, and a neuroscience course (I'm a neuro major). I love my neuro class and actually look forward to going to it. Physics isn't too bad, my instructor is very straight forward and fair. He gives us all of the information we need to succeed. But chemistry is so difficult. It has always been hard for me, even at the cc. But I guess I had more support there. Here, I'm all alone and I feel so overwhelmed. The exams seem impossible. Our class average was a failing grade on the last exam. I study and study and nothing works. We took our first exam last week and I failed terrible and it was worth 10% of our grade. I cried for hours after seeing my grade. I tried talking to my professor and advisors and told them about how overwhelmed I'm feeling and they basically told me that I will never get into (or succeed) in medical school if I can't suck it up and somehow do well.

I hate this school and it's making me hate being a pre-med. Everybody is so harsh and not understanding. It's making me doubt my life long dream of being a doctor. I come from a very under-deserved culture where there aren't many doctors and I've always wanted to be the one to give back to them. Not just to mine, but every community lacking medical resources.

I'm sorry if I'm complaining too much or if I sound whiny but I have literally been miserable for the past month. I have no motivation and it's only getting worse and worse. I wish that I had somebody to talk to about this but I literally have no friends at this new university. My friends all went on to smaller colleges and they seem so happy. Whenever I try to tell my family they tell me to suck it up and that this is the real world. I just feel like I shouldn't be this miserable. I'm seriously considering changing my track to something that will make me much happier but my family and friends would be so heartbroken. I've thought about becoming an elementary school teacher or maybe even a lawyer. English, history, and social science courses have always come naturally to me. I had to work twice as hard in my science courses to succeed. But then, I wonder if I'm limiting myself. I would hate to look back on my life and feel as if I gave up my dream over one crappy semester. I work and volunteer in a hospital right now and I love it so much. I've considered nursing but I don't think that it's something that I would like to do. If I'm going to work in the medical field I wanted to be a doctor and that's it. Again, I'm sorry that this is such a long rant. I've just kept this bottled up and I could use some opinions or insight. I understand that the decision is ultimately mine, but I'm completely lost and could use some help coming to that decision. Thank you in advance.

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[aalamruad]

The first thing I notice is that you say your friends and family will be heartbroken if you change your career path to something that'll make you happier. Choosing medicine is an incredibly personal decision, and one that you alone will have to live with for the rest of your life. It's an enormous commitment, so make sure that you're not just doing it to make your friends or family happy, because that kind of motivation will run out quickly. Perhaps you could do some shadowing soon if you haven't already, in order to get a solid understanding of what you're getting yourself into. It's great that you love your clinical volunteer work, but that might not be enough to show you what being a doctor is really like, and there are plenty of other great ways to give back to your community other than becoming a doctor.

You should also speak with a counselor at your school. Parents/peers/professors can be harsh and intimidating, but your school counselors should be equipped to support you through this emotional time in a healthy and realistic way. I'd recommend setting up an appointment as soon as possible.

Good luck my friend, you'll get through this.

 

[PreMedStudent55555]

Failing one exam isn't the end of the world. Break out of this failure mentality and think about how you can improve and what you need to do to improve. How did you study? What were the flaws. One of my favorite quotes from Malcolm X is: "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." You're not just going to become a doctor by being sad over failing and etc. A lot of med students messed up in their premed journey but worked hard to improve and pick themselves up. This is what you have to do. Don't see this as a failure but a lesson on what you need to do to improve. If you succeed, then this will be a great story for you to tell and med schools like to see improvement. Best of luck to you, OP.

 

[Goro]

I'll be happy to help, but can you simply ask your questions without the novella?

Hello everybody,

I should start off by saying that I'm not new to this forum, I've been silently reading threads since I started college but have never posted. I tried looking for a thread similar to my situation but I can't find one similar enough to take advice from.

I'm a sophomore in college. I did a program in high school where I could get my Associates of Science at a community college while still in high school. I graduated from high school but I had to continue an extra semester at the cc to finish up my degree. I started off by taking science electives rather than taking pre-reqs because I heard that community college pre-reqs don't look too good to adcoms. I ended up having to take Gen Chem 1 and Bio 1 at the cc to avoid falling behind. I don't want to say that the pre req courses at the cc were easy, but for some reason I learned better there. I had all of my friends there with me and we studied together. I was comfortable and happy and did pretty well. This semester, I transferred to a very competitive four year university. I'm currently taking Gen Chem 2, Physics, and a neuroscience course (I'm a neuro major). I love my neuro class and actually look forward to going to it. Physics isn't too bad, my instructor is very straight forward and fair. He gives us all of the information we need to succeed. But chemistry is so difficult. It has always been hard for me, even at the cc. But I guess I had more support there. Here, I'm all alone and I feel so overwhelmed. The exams seem impossible. Our class average was a failing grade on the last exam. I study and study and nothing works. We took our first exam last week and I failed terrible and it was worth 10% of our grade. I cried for hours after seeing my grade. I tried talking to my professor and advisors and told them about how overwhelmed I'm feeling and they basically told me that I will never get into (or succeed) in medical school if I can't suck it up and somehow do well.

I hate this school and it's making me hate being a pre-med. Everybody is so harsh and not understanding. It's making me doubt my life long dream of being a doctor. I come from a very under-deserved culture where there aren't many doctors and I've always wanted to be the one to give back to them. Not just to mine, but every community lacking medical resources.

I'm sorry if I'm complaining too much or if I sound whiny but I have literally been miserable for the past month. I have no motivation and it's only getting worse and worse. I wish that I had somebody to talk to about this but I literally have no friends at this new university. My friends all went on to smaller colleges and they seem so happy. Whenever I try to tell my family they tell me to suck it up and that this is the real world. I just feel like I shouldn't be this miserable. I'm seriously considering changing my track to something that will make me much happier but my family and friends would be so heartbroken. I've thought about becoming an elementary school teacher or maybe even a lawyer. English, history, and social science courses have always come naturally to me. I had to work twice as hard in my science courses to succeed. But then, I wonder if I'm limiting myself. I would hate to look back on my life and feel as if I gave up my dream over one crappy semester. I work and volunteer in a hospital right now and I love it so much. I've considered nursing but I don't think that it's something that I would like to do. If I'm going to work in the medical field I wanted to be a doctor and that's it. Again, I'm sorry that this is such a long rant. I've just kept this bottled up and I could use some opinions or insight. I understand that the decision is ultimately mine, but I'm completely lost and could use some help coming to that decision. Thank you in advance.

 

[PossibleDOC?]

I'll be happy to help, but can you simply ask your questions without the novella?

NEW CAT PIC!

 

[Goro]

I've had it for awhile.

The cat is sitting on my leg as I write this!

NEW CAT PIC!

 

[Endoxifen]

Hello everybody,

I should start off by saying that I'm not new to this forum, I've been silently reading threads since I started college but have never posted. I tried looking for a thread similar to my situation but I can't find one similar enough to take advice from.

I'm a sophomore in college. I did a program in high school where I could get my Associates of Science at a community college while still in high school. I graduated from high school but I had to continue an extra semester at the cc to finish up my degree. I started off by taking science electives rather than taking pre-reqs because I heard that community college pre-reqs don't look too good to adcoms. I ended up having to take Gen Chem 1 and Bio 1 at the cc to avoid falling behind. I don't want to say that the pre req courses at the cc were easy, but for some reason I learned better there. I had all of my friends there with me and we studied together. I was comfortable and happy and did pretty well. This semester, I transferred to a very competitive four year university. I'm currently taking Gen Chem 2, Physics, and a neuroscience course (I'm a neuro major). I love my neuro class and actually look forward to going to it. Physics isn't too bad, my instructor is very straight forward and fair. He gives us all of the information we need to succeed. But chemistry is so difficult. It has always been hard for me, even at the cc. But I guess I had more support there. Here, I'm all alone and I feel so overwhelmed. The exams seem impossible. Our class average was a failing grade on the last exam. I study and study and nothing works. We took our first exam last week and I failed terrible and it was worth 10% of our grade. I cried for hours after seeing my grade. I tried talking to my professor and advisors and told them about how overwhelmed I'm feeling and they basically told me that I will never get into (or succeed) in medical school if I can't suck it up and somehow do well.

I hate this school and it's making me hate being a pre-med. Everybody is so harsh and not understanding. It's making me doubt my life long dream of being a doctor. I come from a very under-deserved culture where there aren't many doctors and I've always wanted to be the one to give back to them. Not just to mine, but every community lacking medical resources.

I'm sorry if I'm complaining too much or if I sound whiny but I have literally been miserable for the past month. I have no motivation and it's only getting worse and worse. I wish that I had somebody to talk to about this but I literally have no friends at this new university. My friends all went on to smaller colleges and they seem so happy. Whenever I try to tell my family they tell me to suck it up and that this is the real world. I just feel like I shouldn't be this miserable. I'm seriously considering changing my track to something that will make me much happier but my family and friends would be so heartbroken. I've thought about becoming an elementary school teacher or maybe even a lawyer. English, history, and social science courses have always come naturally to me. I had to work twice as hard in my science courses to succeed. But then, I wonder if I'm limiting myself. I would hate to look back on my life and feel as if I gave up my dream over one crappy semester. I work and volunteer in a hospital right now and I love it so much. I've considered nursing but I don't think that it's something that I would like to do. If I'm going to work in the medical field I wanted to be a doctor and that's it. Again, I'm sorry that this is such a long rant. I've just kept this bottled up and I could use some opinions or insight. I understand that the decision is ultimately mine, but I'm completely lost and could use some help coming to that decision. Thank you in advance.

When I was in high school, I took AP chem junior year. The next year, I moved to a new city on the other side of the country and I decided to take Organic Chemistry at a university nearby. Like you, I had no support system, the class was brutal, and I struggled. The first couple exams, I got Ds. After those failures, I figured out exactly how I needed to study in order to learn the material correctly. Then, I dug in and worked until I got results with my new method. I ended up with a B- in the class. Even though it was difficult, that experience was arguably the most valuable I've ever had. Using what I learned then, I've managed to maintain a 3.97 GPA in college. I'm sure if you push through and figure out what you need, you'll be able to overcome this class. Good luck!

 

[LizzyM]

Step away from the computer and find some friends. Organize a study group or join one. One of my kids found that made a world of difference.
Learn how to learn. Go to your university tutoring center if they have one, office hours if your professors offer them, and utilize all the resources at your disposal.

 

[prehealthadvisor55]

First figure out if your undergrad is where you want to be. Then figure out the medicine part.

I personally detest those high school AA programs for this reason, but that's a whole separate issue.

Look into student orgs to try to meet people. Are you living off campus? Hang around on campus to study. Talk to others in your classes. You're all in the same boat trying to meet people.

Starting out having trouble doesn't mean medicine isn't for you. But you have to be in it for you, not because your friends or family want it for you.

 

[FlowRate]

Failing at UC Berkeley or Cornell? Alright, your classes may be legitimately extremely difficult.

Failing elsewhere? Welcome to college, this is where most of us who were gifted enough to get through high school with very little work actually had to learn how to study. I echo LizzyM's comments above, in this case.

There were times in undergrad that I was either in class, studying, or doing homework for 80+ hours a week. (Granted, 30-40 of that was usually on one of our two Chem-E weedout courses) This is the next level.

Chemistry can be an exceptionally tough subject. I think that also makes it more amenable to tutoring, if you can find someone to break down concepts for you.

 

[danimal22]

Honestly, cc pre-reqs aren't horrible. It's better to get an A at a cc than a D or F at a normal four-year place. You could probably just drop this chem and retake next semester with a better professor or just take it at the cc this summer.

 

[dpmd]

There are a bunch of separate issue all coming together it seems. In no particular order:

Failure stripping you of your motivation. This is a huge problem. If you continue your path in medicine this will not be the last time you fail. Learning how to deal with that failure in productive ways is vital. This is something a counselor can potentially help with, or maybe just someone who can help you out things in perspective.

Motivation for medicine from an external focus. Now maybe it isn't just about your friends and family the way your post makes it sound, but you need to figure out why you want to do it and if the answer isn't because I can't think of anything else that I can do in life that would fulfill me as much or something similar you would probably be better off pursuing something else. When you are missing out on life studying in med school or racking up the hours in residency, the fact you are making your friends and family happy isn't going to be enough to keep you going. There are a ton of ways to help underserved populations that don't require the same sort of sacrifice that medicine does. There is no shame in changing your path if it is what you want to do.

Scholastic difficulty. Hard to say if this is just because CC was easier and didn't prepare you enough for the coursework, or if homesickness and not fitting in with your current school is the culprit (probably a combo). Agree with finding a tutor, finding a study group, finding friends. Evaluate what about the school you dislike before you think about transferring. No reason to change schools only to have the same issues follow you

Comparing yourself to others. There are always going to be people who seem to be doing better than you are are happier than you but you never really know, nor should it matter. Maybe your friends are just putting on a brave face when they talk to you and are actually miserable too. Maybe they really are doing great because they found a groove for studying that works for them. Maybe a million other things. Who cares? Focus on you. Their success or failure doesn't affect your success or failure. Even the success or failure or your classmates doesn't really affect your success or failure (aside from if it skews the curve). Strive to do the best you can. If your best isn't good enough, try to make changes so it becomes good enough. If that still doesn't work don't feel too bad because not everyone that wants to be a doctor can but that doesn't mean you can't do great things in life anyway.