🙂
You have every right to be offended whenever you want. But you'd be better off not.
Let's ask the q a different way.
How will you handle it when the patient/attending/coffee cart guy assumes you are a nurse?
How will you handle it when the nurses let the male interns get away with all kinds of **** and yet complain about your most minor transgressions?
Do you think the mommy track is a bad use of societal resources?
Oh, and when that old surgical attending calls you "hun" are you really going to benefit by going to war?
Be offended. Be very offended. That said, poker face. When I am faced with horse**** like this in an interview, or IRL as a lady, especially as a lady doc, I usually just look mildly surprised like it never occurred to me that anyone would ever question my competence on that basis, because none of these things are issues. I don't flinch when psychotic patients fling feces at my face, I calmly and pragmatically blink. I'm not offended in that these questions say nothing about me but are problems others present for me to solve. I'm glad to bring any of my unique experiences as a physician.
The way male interns are treated has no bearing on me. I try to be the best human being I can be. I don't assume differences in treatment from professional colleagues is related to anything but my presence, not my genitals.
Patients will have any number of issues with me or my colleagues, all I can do is be professional and offer reassurance that each of us while unique are capable of providing the care needed at the moment, any help with be called for if necessary. I'm proud to be an example and offer that yes, I am a female physician, yes/no I am married, yes/no children. Then I move on. My confidence and comfort with these topics is either reassuring to patients and we continue or they ask for a gay/transgender/Latino/old magic flying magic carpet physician, I tell them if I know more I will be able to help you, otherwise ask why they might feel more comfortable with imaginary doctor, and then tell them sure I will try to find one for you/no they don't exist, what next? If imaginary doctor cannot be reached, I would like to help you by.....
When I am mistaken for a nurse, I politely say "oh I'm one of the docs" to anyone around, to a patient I proudly state (not angry) "Actually, I'm Doctor Crayola," continue sentence as though I am correcting how someone says my name. I don't assume anyone knows who anyone is. Even when I say that 3 times in a row.
I don't feel the need to correct the old and ignorant doctors around me unless it will affect pateint management. If it will, then polite statement of fact of who I am. "Please call me so and so." (With an old doc, no standing on title, first name or hey intern is fine)
Mommy track? I don't know what that is. Right now focus is on training. I figure out of a few decades of practice, there may be a few years where I spend a less time with patients to be with my children, just the investment all moms and the rest of society's gotta do in raising those kids up right, hopefully those few years will result in decades of them being healthier adults, better future patients.for the next gen, until I get back to the full time game with everyone else, but that's down the road.
My mentality? I asked how YOU will respond. Sounds like you bombed the interview.
While proceeding through the long road to attendinghood, you will struggle if you find every small injustice worth a response. You will be perceived as the problem eventually ( or even immediately). Your response is immature.
Unfortunately, while I hate the post above, the truth is that responding, will be seen as immature and a problem. Shank those misogynists anonymously and carefully, pick your battles. I'm biding my time to get to attending and unleashing the full force of beauracracy on it as harshly and shrewdly as I can, if my mere nerve and steely eye don't dissolve it with my presence and a glance.
There was literally zero implication involved in his response. He presented few scenarios (which do happen commonly in real life), and asked for OP's response. It is a valid inquiry to assess whether OP can handle the clinical years and residency without breaking down and attacking people over minor nuisances.
Oh God, can you lay there and pretend until you can safely reach under your pillow for a knife and stick them in the back of the head so they never get the chance again? Assuming any of this **** even gets your goat. Just being the sweet sweet bitch I am is winning.
She's saying no to victim blaming. rather than telling someone to let it go or grow a thick skin, do something about it so people learn its not acceptable. I agree with that, but at the same time as someone said above, choose your battles wisely
The thick skin I'm talking about is to make you impenetrable until you can rise and crush with your might. This won't be for years, but women live longer on average.
I would personally walk over to hr and file a complaint if I felt that was warranted
At any point if I am able to make anyone answer in any slight way for their sexism, even if only by refusing to allow a reaction to it give me away, I will live to fight another day, and see justice done.
There were illegal questions asked of me, that I made note of. I meditated on them, and when the moment is right, there will be a reckoning with the consultation of an attorney.
Keeping your mouth shut, poker face, documenting, and secret legal counsel, that's how you make OTHER people eat their words while you eat cake.
Until then, soldier on, never let them see you sweat, that's true no matter who you are.
And on the internet, if someone's being sexist say so if you want.
