Kind of in a predicament about my LOR.

[Necr0sis713]

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My Anatomy professor said he would write me a LOR after meeting with him in his office, because he was impressed with my academic work. I got only 2 questions wrong on the first anatomy final (first semester coruse), and 1 wrong on the second course. My grades on the physiology exams were also good. So my grades stood out, all the good stuff, etc.

Before I asked him for my LOR, i met with my TA to ask her if she would recommend me with him, and she said she would be glad to. However, I just got an email from him saying that my TA said that "She can not support you, because her primary reason was that I was unwilling to touch the cadavers during lab"

What does that even mean? I never was "unwilling" to touch any cadavers. There were just some days when I decided that I wasn't gonna wear gloves and use my hands unless I really had to. I was there to observe, use my eye to map out the architecture of the body. When I did need to feel something out, I just put my gloves on and got to work.

I need help explaining myself here, without coming off as a "know it all" or to sound offended, because in all honesty... I kind of am offended, considering that my grades were well above the class average.

 

[----x----]

How I handle some conflicts like this:

meet in person (with TA in this case)
Ask them to share their perspective of the issue, with a goal of understanding how they view it. Validate their perspective as being understandable, and how you may have come to a similar interpretation of the events if you were in their position.
Once they've shared their perspective, ask if it's OK to share your own perspective - to clear up any misconceptions. Discuss your own view as you posted above. Ask if they understand your perspective, even if they don't agree with it.

If they still think you were in the wrong, see if there is something you can do in the future to remedy the situation, or if this issue is intractable for them and you're situation is irredeemable (if so, I wouldn't want a recommendation from them).

Regardless of the outcome of the discussion, sincerely thank them for their time and work just as hard in your coursework. I would not go over the head of the TA to explain your situation to the professor.

 

[Lost in Translation]

Why would you need to go through the TA in the first place? Who's writing the letter, the TA or the prof?

 

[Necr0sis713]

Why would you need to go through the TA in the first place? Who's writing the letter, the TA or the prof?

The professor. But I figured since I had the TA for an entire year she could give me some input, based on my academic performance. I mean...she's the one grading the papers, i'm sure nailing the exam every time would at least make a good impression you know? My professor just emailed me saying that "this is a concern that gives me reservation as well...please provide insight"

 

[Espressso]

+1 @----x---- Meet with the TA asap and see if you can discuss it in person. When it comes to these things, emails are similar to walking around a field of land mines. It's a recipe for misunderstanding.

 

[Necr0sis713]

All's well that ends well. My professor just said "you don't have to contact her, i'm satisfied with your response. You won't have an issue with getting the LOR from me"

 

[----x----]

Glad it worked out!

You definitely know best in terms of how your professor/TA would react based on how well know either of them.

 

[IlyaR]

You guys have cadavers in UG anatomy?


Sent from my iPhone using SDN mobile

 

[Necr0sis713]

You guys have cadavers in UG anatomy?


Sent from my iPhone using SDN mobile

Yessir