Living at home during college, how much of a "life" do you miss out on?

[startswithb]

I commuted most of college to save money. I feel that I missed out much more ACADEMICALLY than I did socially. There were so many distractions living at home, and I often didn't have the motivation to drive 30 min to the library to study at 9 PM and then drive 30 min back to come home. I would try to study at home but it was hard. It was no big deal partying and staying overnight on campus during the weekends, so socially it was fine. The temptation to come home after class for a good meal rather than poptarts in the library was just too tempting and then I wouldn't get enough quality studying done. It was also almost impossible to join study groups or random impromtu study sessions. I managed to live on campus for almost a full year when I was a junior, and that first semester I got my first 4.0. But my senior year I was broke again. 🙁 Moral of the Story: I have no undergrad debt but I'm still not in med school because of my below average GPA.

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[Tatarin1989]

In retrospect, I am sure I would have been just as OK living at home. Your social life is what you make of it.

 

[alwaysaangel]

There are plenty of people who move into the dorms and never grow up. Moving into the dorms doesn't make you grow up. Having to pay your own bills and manage your own life makes you grow up. Besides, the dorms have cafeterias to make your food, most people I knew in the dorms took their laundry home on weekends to their parents' house, and they weren't paying their bills either way.

Fair enough - I didn't really mean "move into the dorms." I just said - move out of his parents house.

I didn't really even think about living in the dorms all 4 years - where I went to school that was almost impossible. You maybe lived in the dorm for one year then got an apartment.

But you are right, he needs to move out of his parents house and live on his own in an apartment. Maybe not the first year but before he's done.

 

[glasshalfMD]

Fair enough - I didn't really mean "move into the dorms." I just said - move out of his parents house.

I didn't really even think about living in the dorms all 4 years - where I went to school that was almost impossible. You maybe lived in the dorm for one year then got an apartment.

But you are right, he needs to move out of his parents house and live on his own in an apartment. Maybe not the first year but before he's done.

This is what I was referencing, too. This forces you to grow up.

 

[FlowRate]

Living away from campus sucks, even when you have a big house to yourself. People don't want to go far from campus/downtown. Move out and close to campus if you have the $$.

 

[Protagonistic]

Date a girl who lives in some appartments near campus and stay at her place a lot. Problem solved. Bonus - date a Latina and learn Spanish while you're at it too!

don't got many of those down here bro, mostly Black girls and White girls, not too much into Black girls but would date one if I found the right one, White girl? NEVAR!

 

[Protagonistic]

People here are making it sound like I want to live at home, I really don't. Worst come worse, I will live away from my home if I do not get into the state flagship as a transfer applicant.

See I went to a crappy high school where getting into college wasn't really the goal, had a rough experience adjusting to life in the US, didn't have a stable childhood at all, and with a 1900+ SAT score and B average I am stuck at home at a commuter school, that is what crappy guidance counseling and a crappy high school will do to you.

When I say crappy, I mean every single word, the place was literally a dump. So the fact I am going to college is an achievement. Also, I want to live on my own but simply lack any possible resources to do so.

How can I best compensate for the LOST experience of living in a dorm?

 

[Geekchick921]

 

[Pons Asinorum]

How can I best compensate for the LOST experience of living in a dorm?

By talking to a licensed therapist who can help you work through your varied issues. Pretty please.

 

[Torr]

The Labyrinth?! I likey, GC 😀.

Agree with facepalm. Thisthreadisgoingnowhere.jpg

 

[slatermd]

If I had had more money, I would have moved out sooner, because it was much much more fun, but you guys are blowing the responsibility horn way too hard. It was more responsible for me to live at home and not blow $10,000+ in living expenses. I'm married, have a child, own a house, and I'm mostly done with my first year of surgery residency. I know what responsibility is, and living in the dorms is not your ticket to it.

Like I said, I don't think it matters whether or not this guys lives in the dorms. I agree that the simple act of moving out doesn't automatically make you a responsible person.

When I say this kid needs to take responsibility for himself I'm not talking about cooking food and doing laundry. Every week, if not every day, he's on here with a new thread lamenting the fact that his parents run his life.

That situation isn't going to get any better as long as he's living under their roof, complaining about every handout they give him.

 

[slatermd]

How can I best compensate for the LOST experience of living in a dorm?

When I "lived" in a dorm, I didn't spend very much time there, bud. The "life" you feel like your missing out on happens elsewhere, usually in a basement with some loud speakers, a ping pong table, and the smell of musty beer.

It will do you some good to get out of your parent's house when you can. And it really won't matter where you go. It doesn't even matter if it happens during college. I had the most fun moving out of the dorm into an apartment with some friends (none of whom I met in my dorm), and later in a house where my basement was one of those basements. I lived with a completely different group of people, also none of whom I met in the dorms.

You have my permission to have fun through the rest of your 20's, so you can make up for lost time. Just stop with these threads.

 

[Protagonistic]

By talking to a licensed therapist who can help you work through your varied issues. Pretty please.

If there was an ignore user button, oh wait, nvm there is.

But then again I can't add you =/

 

[Pons Asinorum]

If there was an ignore user button, oh wait, nvm there is.

But then again I can't add you =/

Feel free. I could hold my breath longer than it will take for you to generate a new thread asking for recommendations on how to deal with a situation you don't have the guts or spine to accept and fix once this thread dries up.

Best of luck. I can count on reading years more threads like this from you. That brings me no joy whatsoever.

 

[Kevin Baker]

It really depends on your personality. I lived on campus all four years at a school where everyone and every party was also on campus. Living off campus would have really closed a lot of doors. My younger brother goes to a more commuter type school and lives at home. But all of the action is around the city and he always has a very extroverted girlfriend who drags him around.

As far as 'life' skills, I'm very happy that by moving out, I was forced to learn to cook, clean, have roommates, budget, and all that jazz. You can do most of that stuff at home, but it may take some willpower to learn it without being forced. My brother never learned some of that stuff and one's body can only go so long eating bagels and hot dogs.

If you're really asking about the 'get drunk and !@#$ hotties' college life, you aren't missing out on much. Even if that is your style, there are no shortage of young adults willing to look over the housing issue.

edit: Just as an aside, as I've seen a few threads like this from you, I ended up moving back in with the rents (for complex, non fiscal reasons. tldr: trying to build a better relationship with my mother, but I also felt obligated for other complex reasons) and it was the worst decision of my life. Don't let your parents rule your life!

 

[alienshards]

There are plenty of people who move into the dorms and never grow up. Moving into the dorms doesn't make you grow up. Having to pay your own bills and manage your own life makes you grow up. Besides, the dorms have cafeterias to make your food, most people I knew in the dorms took their laundry home on weekends to their parents' house, and they weren't paying their bills either way.

Dorms don't quite make you grow up, but they're a stepping stone. Eventually getting your own apartment and learning to manage that is part of growing up. Learning to pay bills on time, pay rent, etc.

I would say first 2 years dorm, last 2 years apt. is probably the best sequence. Lots of friends are made in dorms.

 

[Protagonistic]

hey geniuses, not everyone can live that nice dorm life and has the opportunity to live in a dorm, sorry, that is just how it works

 

[alwaysaangel]

hey geniuses, not everyone can live that nice dorm life and has the opportunity to live in a dorm, sorry, that is just how it works

So don't. But don't live at home with your parents. Get a job and live in an apartment. Just move out and grow up - that is everyone's point.

 

[Torr]

Now I want to hear from you older, more experienced pre-meds and even med students, how much of a "life" does a person miss out on by not living on campus or staying in dorms during college?

Answer:

hey geniuses, not everyone can live that nice dorm life and has the opportunity to live in a dorm, sorry, that is just how it works

I'm all about offering advice, Protagonistic, but this is getting ridiculous. These threads are wasting time and space. Please figure out what you're looking to gain from these discussions. I don't think you're listening to anyone.

 

[45408]

So don't. But don't live at home with your parents. Get a job and live in an apartment. Just move out and grow up - that is everyone's point.

And dig yourself a large financial hole? The exploding cost of tuition with no ability to discharge student loans in bankruptcy is already a big enough problem. Putting even more expenses on your student loans is not a good financial idea.

There are very few undergrads who will have enough time or skills to work a job that would pay for their tuition and living expenses, so moving out will be increasing their debt burden. I made the final decision to jump ship when I landed a full-ride scholarship for college.

I think the socially inept are likely to continue living with their parents, not that living with your parents makes you socially inept.

 

[Parts Unknown]

Now I want to hear from you older, more experienced pre-meds and even med students, how much of a "life" does a person miss out on by not living on campus or staying in dorms during college?

If your ideal Friday night involves a couch, television, Kettle chips, and copious ball scratching, you won't miss much by not living in a dorm.

If, on the other hand, you see the virtue in downing half a bottle of Captain Morgan and having sex with with a 19 year old brunette (admixed with some beer pong and vomiting), then dorm life may be for you.

In all seriousness, there is no single answer to this question. Living with the parents may involve continuing on in the adjacent bedroom, or an above-garage room with a separate entrance and no questions asked. Your parents may be upstanding Southern Baptists, or they may steal your weed.

Along similar lines, living in a dorm may be good, bad, or indifferent. If you are within two standard deviations of attractive and socially normal, and you are eager to suck the marrow from your college years, there is much fun to be had. At no other interval in life does freedom intersect so consistently with immaturity.

 

[Protagonistic]

=/

purpose of this thread = make me understand what I have missed out on

result = make me realize I missed out on a lot of ****

 

[Slack3r]

If your ideal Friday night involves a couch, television, Kettle chips, and copious ball scratching, you won't miss much by not living in a dorm.

If, on the other hand, you see the virtue in downing half a bottle of Captain Morgan and having sex with with a 19 year old brunette (admixed with some beer pong and vomiting), then dorm life may be for you.

In all seriousness, there is no single answer to this question. Living with the parents may involve continuing on in the adjacent bedroom, or an above-garage room with a separate entrance and no questions asked. Your parents may be upstanding Southern Baptists, or they may steal your weed.

Along similar lines, living in a dorm may be good, bad, or indifferent. If you are within two standard deviations of attractive and socially normal, and you are eager to suck the marrow from your college years, there is much fun to be had. At no other interval in life does freedom intersect so consistently with immaturity.

I rarely agree with you on most aspects, but damn did you hit the nail on the head.

Bravo sir. 👍

 

[AsianPersuasion]

Start school in the fall, gonna live at home cause I'm poor.....we'll see how it turns out 😛 definitely gonna join clubs etc though 😀
ultimate frisbee!! YEAHH

 

[Pandapurse]

I would definitely recommend living on campus for at least your first year. I lived in dorms that housed other honors students, and we helped each other out a lot with school, etc. You're forming valuable bonds with the people you live with. Also, they say that students that live on campus do much better academically and are involved much more than students who commute.

Anyways, I think it's all up to choice... I really didn't think I'd like living on campus this much!

 

[SN1]

Well, I can't be the only pre-med living at home for college. Anyways I realize that a situation may arise in which I may have to live at home throughout my college career like other pre-meds or student at my school are doing. Now a lot of what I hear is the following:

1. Life (social life) in college dorms is the heaven of enjoyment for most people. Most people enjoy their social life the most during their life their first two years of college when they are living in dorms and that enjoyment never really comes around again.

2. Living in college dorms for the first two years of college or throughout college usually leads to a better social life and more chances to make friends and enjoy the social life of college.

Summing it up: Living in a college dorm usually leads to a strong social life and friends which last throughout life time.

Now I want to hear from you older, more experienced pre-meds and even med students, how much of a "life" does a person miss out on by not living on campus or staying in dorms during college?

I currently go to a local community college while living at home. YES, I must say that I am missing out a lot on my social life and opportunities to meet chicks BUT on the upside, I have a 4.0 GPA through 50 credits so far.

You have to sacrifice man.. It will pay off in the end.

 

[Protagonistic]

thread made me feel that I missed out on the best part of my life, thanks SDN

 

[KickStart]

Join a frat and you won't miss a thing.

 

[Protagonistic]

I am just going to worry about med school and then work, that will be my enjoyment. Getting the f*ck away from this ghetto dump of a city.

 

[DocDanny]

I commuted for my first two years.

Biggest mistake of my life. You will make most of your college friends during the first semester of Freshman year.

Don't commute if you have a choice.

I commuted all four years.

One of the worst mistakes of my life. I'd love to take it back.

I missed out on so much those years. There is more to life than studying.

Right?

 

[muhali3]

I commuted all four years.

One of the worst mistakes of my life. I'd love to take it back.

I missed out on so much those years. There is more to life than studying.

Right?

and now you're an MD/PhD...😕

 

[SilentSoldier]

My freshman year was spent commuting to school. Biggest mistake of my life and part of the reason why I was so miserable to the point where I had to leave the school for my sanity. Everything just became so much better when I went away for college and lived on campus. I totally regret not actually going to the school to do the whole freshman dorm thing, but I managed to make up for it by living on campus for the three years after I transferred. I think it helped me find the extracurriculars that really led towards my interest in medicine.

 

[DocDanny]

and now you're an MD/PhD...😕

I need to change that. No, I'm not.

 

[searun]

Join a frat and you won't miss a thing.

Most frats require you to live in the frat house, at least for one or two years. At least that was required by my frat and I think it is pretty common. I got the hell out of Dodge when I graduated from high school - fortunately I had a really good financial aid package - otherwise I might have been a sad sack living with my parents and going to my local state school.

 

[kexy]

Get good grades, join a frat, get dues scholarship for said frat because of your GPA, live in frat house for free.

Alternatively... become an RA, get free room and board.

 

[2012mdc]

Well, I can't be the only pre-med living at home for college. Anyways I realize that a situation may arise in which I may have to live at home throughout my college career like other pre-meds or student at my school are doing. Now a lot of what I hear is the following:

1. Life (social life) in college dorms is the heaven of enjoyment for most people. Most people enjoy their social life the most during their life their first two years of college when they are living in dorms and that enjoyment never really comes around again.

2. Living in college dorms for the first two years of college or throughout college usually leads to a better social life and more chances to make friends and enjoy the social life of college.

Summing it up: Living in a college dorm usually leads to a strong social life and friends which last throughout life time.

Now I want to hear from you older, more experienced pre-meds and even med students, how much of a "life" does a person miss out on by not living on campus or staying in dorms during college?

What school do you go to? Is it a commuter school? Or one with 4 years guaranteed housing?

I wouldn't trade my dorm experience for anything but my undergrad had 4 years guaranteed housing and something like 95% of students lived on campus all 4 years.

Some of my friends went to commuter schools and their dorm experience just wasn't that impressive and they were home every weekend

 

[osumc2014]

a lot of schools require living in dorms first year anyway, I'd do that, and then move out asap, wayyy too expensive. Somewhere off campus (my last 3 years in college) or if you are like me (poor med student) live at home.

 

[oar2386]

Hey protag,
I showed this to a friend of mine who was really struggling with his first year in college. Everyone knows college is hard, but you have to remember that is is meant to be fun too. Learn about yourself, explore new things, do stupid stuff. Hope this helps.

How to have fun in college

 

[searun]

When I lived in the dorms my freshman year, we would stay up late and talk and we figured out alot of very cool stuff, like God does not really exist, things like that - that was good to know since I graduated from a Catholic high school.

And then there was this really attractive girl who also lived in my dorm and she gave me a pillow and a nice blanket - apparently she liked me.

 

[2012mdc]

a lot of schools require living in dorms first year anyway, I'd do that, and then move out asap, wayyy too expensive. Somewhere off campus (my last 3 years in college) or if you are like me (poor med student) live at home.

Again it depends on the school. Where I went to undergrad it was definitely cheaper to live in the dorms as opposed to off campus

 

[iamcool]

I think I have said this to you before. You need to live your own life and stop comparing your life to others.

I commuted all 4 years from home. I am glad I did it and I had a great time in college. I do not care if I missed out on a lot of cool stuff. I simply do not give a ****.