marriage and name changes

[ddmo]

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i can see what you're saying, but i think doctors should be called by their first name, so to me, that is moot.

Studies show that doctors who allow their patients to use their first name are more likely to get sued.

 

[shivalrous]

Studies show that doctors who allow their patients to use their first name are more likely to get sued.

😱 will remember that...personally, i don't see the big deal in a guy changing his last name to his wife's. what if his name sounds better with his wife's last name?

 

[Tiki]

Whether I get published or not, I plan on taking my husband's last name, and to be honest I don't see it as much of a sacrifice.

What I do see as a sacrifice is the fact that he will have to wait till I get out of med school before we have kids, that he will have to be the one to do alot of the household stuff since I won't be around, that there will be times when I'm not around when he might need me, ect. ect.

I chose to go into a career where I knew that I would have to give up alot, but he never signed on for that. Yes, he knew what my life would entail and it was his decision to be with me, but I still can't forget how much he sacrifices for me so I can follow my dreams. So the least I can do is change my name when we get married. Besides, I love him and would be honored to have his name.

No disrespect to those that keep thier last names. I know it is a personal decision.

 

[EMTLizzy]

Remember that after you are married that all your assets (and debts!) become shared. So really it's both people's money that's being spent. If either person is not willing to share finances, then again I think you have to think about your committment to the marriage.
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This isn't true. You're more than welcome to keep your finances separate and it wouldn't show any less commitment to your relationship.

My fi and I plan to have separate finances. Maybe that's because I'm used to that arrangement since my parents had that. Worked fine for the 25 years they were married 😀

The main reason was because mom is a doctor. Dad had done pretty well working on wall street. If PsychoPatient A along with AmbulanceChaser Esq. decided to sue her it was better that my father's finances not be tied up in the mess.

It never happened, but separate finances worked out well. They could each buy what they wanted when they wanted.

And, as we learned from the Sunscreen Song...Don't put all your faith in trust funds or men. You never know when one will run out on you.

 

[SMRT]

This isn't true. You're more than welcome to keep your finances separate and it wouldn't show any less commitment to your relationship.

My fi and I plan to have separate finances. Maybe that's because I'm used to that arrangement since my parents had that. Worked fine for the 25 years they were married 😀

The main reason was because mom is a doctor. Dad had done pretty well working on wall street. If PsychoPatient A along with AmbulanceChaser Esq. decided to sue her it was better that my father's finances not be tied up in the mess.

It never happened, but separate finances worked out well. They could each buy what they wanted when they wanted.

And, as we learned from the Sunscreen Song...Don't put all your faith in trust funds or men. You never know when one will run out on you.

This does seem like a situation where it makes sense to have separate finances. I guess I'm thinking that even if your and your spouse's finances are legally separate, your spouse's financial situation is going to affect you. I doesn't make sense (to me at least) to have the husband rack up credit card debt to buy a huge rock, while the wife sits on a big pile of money. Any woman that insists on her fiance going into debt to buy her a ring has got some issues.

Anyways, now I have gotten completely off topic.

 

[snaklee]

After reading some of the posts here, I have to ask, is getting an md degree really that big of a deal to some of you? Sure it's hard work, but is it really that hard? 8 yrs of mental gymnastics and you act as if you are in an assembly plant... Prescribing the same prescriptions day afer dayafterdayafterdayafterday, performing the same operations dayafterdayafterdayafterday.

Chances are that none of you will ever invent anything, you'll never make the national news or even leave any other type of legacy (if you don't have children) other than the fact that somewhere in someones historic lineage (if you have children and they aren't screwed up), they had a blahblahblah relative who was was some sort of doctor but they can't seem to remember anything else about them.

There are well over a half million of us md types running around like wild animals (and multiplying like rabbits from inside and outside sources). If one has the $ and the patience, one can go to another country and get one. It sure is easier than factory work for forty years. If some man or woman was really smart, they'd get on the internet and find themself a beautiful foreign md, without all of the strangeness of some of the American ones, marry her and skip medical school completely if desired!

At the present, I can only think of one md who regularly makes the national news and it is only because he is a senator.
Some of the women in this discussion act as if the md degree is the only thing they have going for them (the sad thing is, it may be true). The md degree isn't the most difficult degree to get. Look at some of your classmates! You know what I'm talking about.

Go to the local burger joint and spew that crap about how you're an md, they'll laugh at you for being so tacky!

Sure you've worked hard, but almost everyone everywhere in the world, except for the real rich, has work hard too.

If that is your only reason for wanting to keep your last name, I find it
S-T-R-A-N-G-E!

Any status that some of you may give yourselves comes almost entirely from within.

It is how you THINK that others see you.

Some here act as if they weren't in the md school that the seat would be empty.

 

[Elysium]

After reading some of the posts here, I have to ask, is getting an md degree really that big of a deal to some of you? Sure it's hard work, but is it really that hard? 8 yrs of mental gymnastics and you act as if you are in an assembly plant... Prescribing the same prescriptions day afer dayafterdayafterdayafterday, performing the same operations dayafterdayafterdayafterday.

Chances are that none of you will ever invent anything, you'll never make the national news or even leave any other type of legacy (if you don't have children) other than the fact that somewhere in someones historic lineage (if you have children and they aren't screwed up), they had a blahblahblah relative who was was some sort of doctor but they can't seem to remember anything else about them.

There are well over a half million of us md types running around like wild animals (and multiplying like rabbits from inside and outside sources). If one has the $ and the patience, one can go to another country and get one. It sure is easier than factory work for forty years. If some man or woman was really smart, they'd get on the internet and find themself a beautiful foreign md, without all of the strangeness of some of the American ones, marry her and skip medical school completely if desired!

At the present, I can only think of one md who regularly makes the national news and it is only because he is a senator.
Some of the women in this discussion act as if the md degree is the only thing they have going for them (the sad thing is, it may be true). The md degree isn't the most difficult degree to get. Look at some of your classmates! You know what I'm talking about.

Go to the local burger joint and spew that crap about how you're an md, they'll laugh at you for being so tacky!

Sure you've worked hard, but almost everyone everywhere in the world, except for the real rich, has work hard too.

If that is your only reason for wanting to keep your last name, I find it
S-T-R-A-N-G-E!

Any status that some of you may give yourselves comes almost entirely from within.

It is how you THINK that others see you.

Some here act as if they weren't in the md school that the seat would be empty.

Dude, what in God's name are you talking about? Nobody ever said that being a doctor was so special that it was the primary motivation for not changing one's name. The reason why women wouldn't change their name after they graduated from med school is because of issues with liscensure, etc. You can't get have a DEA license in one name and then practice under another name. It's just the legality of it, plain and simple. Quite honestly, I find people that are fixated on how fantastic they are because they're in med school a total bore. There are a hell of a lot harder things and degrees to get than an MD. No one's disputing that. I think you missed the entire point of this discussion.

And, for the record, I wouldn't change my name regardless if I was a doctor or a lawyer or a desperate housewife. It's my name and my choice. Other people have a different opinion. I think it's funny that guys get all insecure and offended that a woman might not want to suddenly take on a new identity. What's the big deal? Seriously? Do you think it really underminds your wife's commitment to you? There are so many other important things in a marriage - and I can guarantee you that changing ones name is no harbinger of the success of a marriage.

 

[roja]

*rotfl*

You have got to be kidding. that is a hysterical rant, snaklee.


And I'm with elysium. I didn't want to be a doctor from a fetus. In fact, I had a degree and career in something completely non-science, and I have never really planned to change my name. It has more to do with the fact that, well, its been my name forever. Its who I am.

And given the rate of divorce, including the vast majority who change thier name, it is not always a meaninful sign of anything.

Each person should do what is important to them.

 

[snaklee]

I'm in a "ranting" mood today.

Maybe I'll rave tomorrow.

 

[typeB-md]

I'm in a "ranting" mood today.

Maybe I'll rave tomorrow.

well, it seems like the feminine mind is something to rant about these days. every woman wants her own freedoms w/o any extra responsibility.

if she doesn't change her last name, we get a prenup. simple as that.

 

[Elysium]

well, it seems like the feminine mind is something to rant about these days. every woman wants her own freedoms w/o any extra responsibility.

if she doesn't change her last name, we get a prenup. simple as that.

Agreed! I don't want no man stealing all my hard earned money.