Marriage and School?

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melody124

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Was anyone in PT school newly married, where the other person was already working full time and how did it strain the marriage and the idea of having a family?

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I think this's been talked about before. Check out the search function see what you can find
 
I have been married for almost two years. I haven't started PT school yet (starting in July) But for the past year I've been working full time, plus taking 1-2 prereqs a semester, plus teaching karate two nights a week, so I can tell relate to being married with a full schedule. As long as you schedule your time well and make it a priority to spend quality time together, you will be fine! If you are thinking about postponing getting married because of PT school, I'm not sure what the benefit would be. There will be many times in the future when you or your spouse will be very busy. Also, I think the stability and support of marriage will be helpful during school.

That said, I am definitely waiting until after graduation before having kids, knock on wood.
 
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My husband is in his second year of pharmacy school. I'm not in PT school yet but I am taking 18-21 credit hours of undergraduate courses per semester so I can hurry up and get to PT school. We married right before he started pharmacy school. We have a 2 year old son as well. We always make Saturday a family day, no studying allowed. We split Sunday in half- each of us gets 6 hours to focus on school work while the other entertains the baby. On weeknights, we have a few hours of family time and then we put our son to bed at 7:00 and spend the next 3-5 hours on school work.

Having a family life has not been difficult at all despite our heavy school loads.
 
@villacog The only problem I see is that it doesn't seem like you leave any amount of time (however short) for personal activities such as exercise. I know that family should be your first priority, but you need to schedule "you time" as well. Otherwise, you'll burn out quickly.
 
PT school is hard. It's time-consuming, both physically and mentally and requires quite a commitment and dedication; much like a marriage. I wasn't married in PT school, but among my class there were 4 divorces, a marriage called off, as well as two classmates who did get married during the last year of PT school. Also, many long-term relationships came to an end during PT school, including mine. Certainly, my observations are anecdotal. I would say keep the communication lines open, find time for yourself and time for your relationship, in addition to studying. Time management, stress management, a good support system of friends and familty,and attitude are clutch.
 
PT school is hard. It's time-consuming, both physically and mentally and requires quite a commitment and dedication; much like a marriage. I wasn't married in PT school, but among my class there were 4 divorces, a marriage called off, as well as two classmates who did get married during the last year of PT school. Also, many long-term relationships came to an end during PT school, including mine. Certainly, my observations are anecdotal. I would say keep the communication lines open, find time for yourself and time for your relationship, in addition to studying. Time management, stress management, a good support system of friends and familty,and attitude are clutch.

That seems like a lot of drama for one class. So far we've had one marriage, and a couple of relationships start between classmates. I don't ask how they're going but I know they're still together. I do not recommend you get married or start a relationship while in PT school. It would be worse to do it before. There's no rush, especially if you're in your early 20's. You need to focus on school. You'll be studying outside of school a lot, have group projects you need to complete, and be at school 50-60 hours during the week. If you're already in a relationship, tell your SO that you won't be seeing each other much. If they understand, then the relationship can work.

Kevin
 
I think if a marriage can't survive the strain of someone being in pt school it is pretty much doomed anyway. How would they manage the stress of an infant, balancing work and family, illness, a job loss....anything that life could throw in their path?
 
I'm just finishing my second year of DPT school, and so far we've had 6 marriages including my own with another happening this summer. So far we're all happy, balanced people with happy, balanced marriages. I think it probably depends on your personality, though. I don't see school being any more busy than a job will be. Marriage isn't always going to be the most convenient, and there probably won't ever be the "perfect" time. My advice: most of the time your dreams won't just come to you. Sometimes you have to run them down. It'll take grit and determination to make it work, but any marriage takes grit and determination to make it work.
 
Thank you everyone. My boyfriend and I talk about getting engaged the spring before PT school starts and the thought of starting a stable marriage while being consumed in school and him at work all day seems unrealistic. It mostly leads to cold feet about the engagement because it is asking him to put his life on hold for three years until we can have dinners with one another every night and start a family. Everyones feed back has been greatly appreciated and insightful.
 
I I don't see school being any more busy than a job will be.

Unless you're working 50 hours during the week and PRN on the weekends. PT school is definitely more demanding than a job. Just ask practicing PT's on this forum. PT school owns you.

Kevin
 
@villacog The only problem I see is that it doesn't seem like you leave any amount of time (however short) for personal activities such as exercise. I know that family should be your first priority, but you need to schedule "you time" as well. Otherwise, you'll burn out quickly.

I get up an hour earlier than my husband to fit in exercise. You are right though, I don't have a lot of personal time but I don't seem to crave it either.

I recently got out of the military and was seperated from my husband and son for several months at a time so I guess the demands of school on my time are no big deal in comparison. I agree with those who said there is rarely a convenient time to start a family.
 
I think if a marriage can't survive the strain of someone being in pt school it is pretty much doomed anyway. How would they manage the stress of an infant, balancing work and family, illness, a job loss....anything that life could throw in their path?

:thumbup: :thumbup: Because of living and going to church right next to Midwestern University (Glendale), I have known literally dozens and dozens of married couples with a spouse in med school, pharmacy school, dental school, PT school and everything else. A lot of them have had a baby. They don't love it, but they do fine and their marriages all last. It depends on the attitude you have/importance you place on marriage.

I think the med student wives w/ babies hate it more during the residencies than during school...
 
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