Married and moving to the Uk

Started by AceRH731
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AceRH731

Glasgow!
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I couldn't seem to find a thread about this topic so I am hoping you guys can help me. I was accepted to the University of Glasgow a year earlier than expected. I applied this round so I could do file reviews and better my application for next cycle. Never would I have thought I would get in this time. So here are my question, how many of you studying in UK schools are married and brought your husbands? Have they adjusted well? My husband is more than supportive and wants us to take this opportunity together but I cant help feeling selfish asking him to be my (mental) support in vet school and moving countries. 🙁
 
I couldn't seem to find a thread about this topic so I am hoping you guys can help me. I was accepted to the University of Glasgow a year earlier than expected. I applied this round so I could do file reviews and better my application for next cycle. Never would I have thought I would get in this time. So here are my question, how many of you studying in UK schools are married and brought your husbands? Have they adjusted well? My husband is more than supportive and wants us to take this opportunity together but I cant help feeling selfish asking him to be my (mental) support in vet school and moving countries. 🙁

Off the top of my head I can name 15 married couples who live over here together (but there are way more in the younger years I don't know). One couple is still married, but he moved back to the states for work. The rest are happily living here. Some spouses study/go for another degree, most find jobs.

Doesn't make you selfish...it's an amazing opportunity! Sounds like he is super supportive too. Extended European vacation/honeymoon? 😉
 
Congratulations first of all. 🙂

Second of all, I don't think it's selfish of you to ask him to move with you. Veterinary school is very difficult, emotionally and intellectually. You'll need all the emotional support you can get! That being said, sometimes a move can be difficult especially to a foreign country (jobs and finances muddle everything!). From what I've read from previous threads, your husband will be able to get a visa because you are a student. However, you don't want him to move all the way out there and not have a job. What does he do for a living? I think that will be the big factor. It might be good to start testing the waters of the job market if you will.

I don't want to sugar coat it for you. I think it will be tough, but with the right research and knowledge you'll be able to work things out. Maybe Joyce could connect you with the right people?

Anyway, I definitely think you have one good thing going for you and that's being married. There was a guy on my interview day who was with his girlfriend. He was wondering how she could join him and Joyce's only answer was for them to get married or for her to study abroad. But maybe that was the excuse they were looking for!

Also, just as an addition, I often worried to excess about acting or being selfish in my own relationship. I am very reliefed to have been accepted to Glasgow. My boyfriend is Scottish and if I was accepted to a university in the US or Caribbean it would have meant an additional 4 years of being apart. We have already lived apart for 3 1/2 years. He understood that I didn't want to put my professional life on hold (likewise he didn't want to do the same and I couldn't ask him to). In the long run we would have made it work, but it was still worrying.
 
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Thanks so much for the replies 🙂 he really wants to go back to school and finish his bachelors so with the move this may be the perfect opportunity. He has a great job here as a regional manager for nutrition shops. There aren't nutrition shops from what I know of in Europe so that could be a problem. However, he is amazing at any job and works his way to the top fast.

It's so hard to not think I am being selfish but he is quick to remind me that he will support me in anything. I think moving to Scotland would be a once in a lifetime expereince for us. We have been through hell and back together, high school sweet hearts, married young and moved states when we were only 19. Whats moving across the world? 😉
 
Thanks so much for the replies 🙂 he really wants to go back to school and finish his bachelors so with the move this may be the perfect opportunity. He has a great job here as a regional manager for nutrition shops. There aren't nutrition shops from what I know of in Europe so that could be a problem. However, he is amazing at any job and works his way to the top fast.

It's so hard to not think I am being selfish but he is quick to remind me that he will support me in anything. I think moving to Scotland would be a once in a lifetime expereince for us. We have been through hell and back together, high school sweet hearts, married young and moved states when we were only 19. Whats moving across the world? 😉

3 universities in Glasgow alone: UofG, Caledonian, and Strathclyde...so he will def have options if he wants to go back to school. Will make him getting a Visa that much easier as well.

There are a few nutrition shops scattered around town....and Wholefoods just opened up outside of the city. A lot of US companies are expanding out here.

Sounds like you have quite the man!

Now...stop worrying and go out and celebrate! You got into Vet School today!!!!😀
 
Holland and Barrett (http://www.hollandandbarrett.com) is a chain he might consider putting his CV in for. Not sure where it's located in Glasgow though.

It will be an adventure! Just think, this could be one of the few chances you have to live abroad. Unavoidable side effects may include increased wanderlust and adoption of Britishisms.
 
I'm on the flip side of the equation- I came to Canada from the US for school and left my (now fiance) behind. If you want thoughts on that I'm happy to give my experiences but if your husband is eager to join you, it sounds like an exciting opportunity. I would absolutely ask SnS to put you in touch with a couple of people experiencing it, though, to give you an idea of some of the things you may or may not be able to prepare yourself for.

Congrats on getting in 🙂
 
I know a few married couples at Edinburgh. Like previous posters mentioned, because you're married, he can get a visa too.

My only word of warning, and this comes from watching my best friend and her husband get a divorce last year, is that make sure he knows what he is in for. You are both moving to a new country, but you will have the added benefit of entire community of vet students that are in a similar situation. When he meets them, at first they will all be "your" friends. This doesn't mean they wont be his friends eventually too, but when you don't have a job or classes right away, it is hard to go out and make new friends in a new country. Plus, vet school takes up soooo much more of your time than undergrad. So this means that he is now in a new country and has to reduce the amount of time he normally spends with you. I just mention these things, because it was not something my friend's hubby was expecting and it was definitely a huge part of the issues they had. Obviously it was not the only issue, but it can create strife.

Unfortunately my husband could not move over here with me. Although we are making it work, and some times I think it is for the best that he is not here (like before exams when I spend 16 hours a day studying), I would take him being here over the LD any day.

I hope you don't think I am trying to scare you or make ANY assumptions about you guys when you move here. Just from watching my friend and her ex, I want to warn couples that are entering a similar situation to look at the potential downfalls that might occur. Especially ones that are not necessarily obvious.
 
I know a few married couples at Edinburgh. Like previous posters mentioned, because you're married, he can get a visa too.

My only word of warning, and this comes from watching my best friend and her husband get a divorce last year, is that make sure he knows what he is in for. You are both moving to a new country, but you will have the added benefit of entire community of vet students that are in a similar situation. When he meets them, at first they will all be "your" friends. This doesn't mean they wont be his friends eventually too, but when you don't have a job or classes right away, it is hard to go out and make new friends in a new country. Plus, vet school takes up soooo much more of your time than undergrad. So this means that he is now in a new country and has to reduce the amount of time he normally spends with you. I just mention these things, because it was not something my friend's hubby was expecting and it was definitely a huge part of the issues they had. Obviously it was not the only issue, but it can create strife.

Unfortunately my husband could not move over here with me. Although we are making it work, and some times I think it is for the best that he is not here (like before exams when I spend 16 hours a day studying), I would take him being here over the LD any day.

I hope you don't think I am trying to scare you or make ANY assumptions about you guys when you move here. Just from watching my friend and her ex, I want to warn couples that are entering a similar situation to look at the potential downfalls that might occur. Especially ones that are not necessarily obvious.

I do thank you for your opinion Packen and it is nice knowing all sides. A major reason I have decided on Glasgow and a 5 year program is so that I can have a bit more time with him while im in school vs the state schools. He is very much aware of everything you have spoken about and we have actually experienced this to a degree already. When we first moved states so I could attend a different college we went through this. I was taking 21 credits and was never home. He looked for a job for two months before finding one and with that he had started making friends. I know vet school will be much more extreme but if I didn't think we could do it, I wouldn't have accepted. I applaud you and your SO for doing LD. I am amazed that you can be in vet school and a LD.👍
 
To those of you that know married couples - do you happen to know if most found jobs before moving there, or if they waited until arriving to look? I would imagine he would have a better chance once we are actually there, but I just wanted to hear what others have done.

None of the spouses I know had jobs before moving here. They all got something once they arrived. Although, depending on the field, it couldn't hurt to send out a few CVs ahead of time (like this summer). I am not sure what your hubby does, but if he is considering temp jobs at first (like waiting tables or bar tending) August is a horrible month for that. The festival is all month and people all over the world are here and they all look to pick up odd jobs.

Oh, and if he does something that might require a license (law, teach, radiologist), make sure he looks into all the UK regulations. One classmate's husband was told his qualification was not good over here and had a really hard time finding any work.

Also, since we will be married and with pets, I definitely do not plan on doing university housing. What is the best way to find a place? I want to arrange a short-term stay somewhere while we look for something more long-term - any ideas on how to arrange something like this? (would a pet-friendly hotel be our best bet?)

If it is at all possible, the easiest thing to do is to move over here, find a place and then have your pets shipped. Pet friendly hotels are not common in the city. Plus, depending on when you arrive, finding pet friendly housing can take a while, which could make your hotel stay extremely expensive. I only know one student that moved over with her dogs, and she found a place on-line for a temporary lease (1 or 2 months) and then looked for something else. The problem was she needed a current student to go and look at the place for her, and it can be difficult because most landlords want to meet in person before they rent.
 
I was accepted to the RVC in London, and I am strongly considering it. How hard is it for a husband to get a visa? And what about a job? My husband is an English teacher and I'm really concerned about the move...
 
I too will be moving with my spouse this August! We will be going to Edinburgh. I am relieved to find that he will be able to get a visa easily enough, however I am worried about him finding a job.

To those of you that know married couples - do you happen to know if most found jobs before moving there, or if they waited until arriving to look? I would imagine he would have a better chance once we are actually there, but I just wanted to hear what others have done.

Also, since we will be married and with pets, I definitely do not plan on doing university housing. What is the best way to find a place? I want to arrange a short-term stay somewhere while we look for something more long-term - any ideas on how to arrange something like this? (would a pet-friendly hotel be our best bet?)
You could send an email out to current students and ask to sub-let over the summer. This would give you time to find a place of your own. That's what my flatmate and I did. Let me know if you need help with this later on. My flatmate and I may be away during the summer and might be looking to sub-let our place for a couple months. Either way, we'll sort you out. 🙂
Congrats again!
 
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A word of warning. Don't wait until too late if you're going to sub-let over the summer. During the Fringe space becomes... limited.
 
I was accepted to the RVC in London, and I am strongly considering it. How hard is it for a husband to get a visa? And what about a job? My husband is an English teacher and I'm really concerned about the move...

Unless things have changed recently...it isn't possible anymore for spouses to get work visas through the student visas. RVC classifies the program as undergraduate. From what I've heard on here, it might be different at Edinburgh. There are a few students with husbands and all of the ones I know either got here 2.5 years ago (before the rules changed), got a job and have a separate work visa or are European.
 
Unless things have changed recently...it isn't possible anymore for spouses to get work visas through the student visas. RVC classifies the program as undergraduate. From what I've heard on here, it might be different at Edinburgh. There are a few students with husbands and all of the ones I know either got here 2.5 years ago (before the rules changed), got a job and have a separate work visa or are European.

I know at Glasgow it is classified as a "masters" programme which then allows me to bring my husband over as a dependent. He is allowed to work while we are there under my student visa. I think Edinburgh is similar but don't quote me. 😕
 
I know at Glasgow it is classified as a "masters" programme which then allows me to bring my husband over as a dependent. He is allowed to work while we are there under my student visa. I think Edinburgh is similar but don't quote me. 😕

Mmmm I don't think that is right.

Glasgow is a Bachelor's and you are on a Tier 4 Visa.....
 
Mmmm I don't think that is right.

Glasgow is a Bachelor's and you are on a Tier 4 Visa.....

The programme is considered a NQF Level 7 under the Tier 4 Visa. Glasgow explained it to me that it is considered a masters or post graduate study. If we were considered NQF Level 6, which is equivalent to a bachelors degree, we would not be able to bring dependents.

http://www2.ofqual.gov.uk/qualifica...laining-the-national-qualifications-framework

http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/visas-immigration/studying/adult-students/family/
 
My classmates brought spouses this year to Edinburgh so that shouldn't be a problem. I can't personally vouch for RVC or Glasgow. Though I think the rating system is different in Scotland than it is in England.
 
The programme is considered a NQF Level 7 under the Tier 4 Visa. Glasgow explained it to me that it is considered a masters or post graduate study. If we were considered NQF Level 6, which is equivalent to a bachelors degree, we would not be able to bring dependents.

http://www2.ofqual.gov.uk/qualifica...laining-the-national-qualifications-framework

http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/visas-immigration/studying/adult-students/family/

Huh...times have changed I guess. Can't keep up with UK Border....