Need insight on med school/ life

[Toooldforms]

I'm currently 23 y/o and haven't started college yet. I took classes a few times and failed and just didn't feel motivated to go to school. Now I do but I feel kind of old :$ The problem is I neither want to postpone having kids after im 30+ which I would be after everything, nor do I want to balance having kids in med school or as a resident and be the mother that isn't there. As for my residency of choice it's either internal med or pediatrics. Are those good residency for mothers? I heard internal is more difficult (time wise).

I'd like to hear stories of parents with infants who were in med school and how they did it.
I'm also interested to know if there is anyway of "cutting" the time by taking on extra course loads, and what would be a reasonable time.

Thanks in advance

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[Turkishking]

I'm currently 23 y/o and haven't started college yet. I took classes a few times and failed and just didn't feel motivated to go to school. Now I do but I feel kind of old :$ The problem is I neither want to postpone having kids after im 30+ which I would be after everything, nor do I want to balance having kids in med school or as a resident and be the mother that isn't there. As for my residency of choice it's either internal med or pediatrics. Are those good residency for mothers? I heard internal is more difficult (time wise).

I'd like to hear stories of parents with infants who were in med school and how they did it.
I'm also interested to know if there is anyway of "cutting" the time by taking on extra course loads, and what would be a reasonable time.

Thanks in advance

Tackle the pre-reqs, and do it. Plenty of people on this site married in medical school.

 

[efle]

What's wrong with having kids in your 30s?!

I think first step for you would be to go enroll in college, and try hard this time. You might discover other interests that don't take as long to get trained for, and even if you are 100% set on medicine, you need to go get a couple semesters of great grades to know it's possible.

 

[DocDD425]

Why would you want to take the longest academic career path if you don't even have the motivation or strength to start college?


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[Toooldforms]

Elfe- nothing wrong with having kids in your 30s I just prefer to have mine before I'm 34

Docdd425- I didn't have the motivation before and only went due to pressure from society and family, now I have something to aim for. It's something I have a geniuine passion for

 

[21Rush12]

People routinely start medical school at 28-30.

The time will pass either way. The difference is whether you'll be 34 and a doctor or just 34. If it's your passion then don't let the time hold you back.

That said, it's a huge commitment and you'll have to work very hard in undergrad this time to redeem yourself for the multiple failures first time around. Those grades will be factored into your cGPA, and DO grade replacement is gone. Take the time to do some soul searching and figure out what is really the most important to you and how you can make it reality.


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[jcorpsmanMD]

Why would you want to take the longest academic career path if you don't even have the motivation or strength to start college?


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You think it takes motivation and/or strength to start college? lol.

 

[efle]

You think it takes motivation and/or strength to start college? lol.

I feel like a good number of people, if they won the mega-lotto at 18, would never go get a bachelor's. You gotta have some motive

 

[DocDD425]

You think it takes motivation and/or strength to start college? lol.

That's what I was saying...


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[Sardinia]

I feel like a good number of people, if they won the mega-lotto at 18, would never go get a bachelor's. You gotta have some motive

Motives apparently aren't sufficient enough for most of them to cross the finish line.

 

[Nietzsche's Barber]

I'm currently 23 y/o and haven't started college yet. I took classes a few times and failed and just didn't feel motivated to go to school. Now I do but I feel kind of old :$ The problem is I neither want to postpone having kids after im 30+ which I would be after everything, nor do I want to balance having kids in med school or as a resident and be the mother that isn't there. As for my residency of choice it's either internal med or pediatrics. Are those good residency for mothers? I heard internal is more difficult (time wise).

I'd like to hear stories of parents with infants who were in med school and how they did it.
I'm also interested to know if there is anyway of "cutting" the time by taking on extra course loads, and what would be a reasonable time.

Thanks in advance

I started school at a later age and I can tell you that I'm not even the oldest person in my class. There are a bunch in their 30's and a handful in their 40's. Age is a number and it's all relative. For example, someone who graduates medical school at 25 can die at 50, while someone who graduates at 36 can live to 90.

You are never too old, it's all about perspective and happiness. Would you be happier at x age as a doctor or as a non doctor?

If you assign being a mother as a priority, any specialty can work (albeit, the one's you mentioned tend to be easier in terms of lifestyle...except IM). However, I would refrain from having children until after medical school. It's hard enough to get in and do well, let alone take care of a child in the process (but, it can be done).

In terms of speeding up the process, it's doable...but you can't sacrifice grades for speed. Life tip: don't put hard timelines/deadlines on major life events...it breeds misery.

 

[Nietzsche's Barber]

I feel like a good number of people, if they won the mega-lotto at 18, would never go get a bachelor's. You gotta have some motive

Serious question though: would anyone go to college if they hit the lotto big? I could match derm and if I hit the lotto big, I would quit that very second. Does that mean I don't love medicine or helping people? No, it just means that I love not having to work for a living more...

"But what would you do with your time?"

Drink and lay on the beach. Drink and lay on the beach...

 

[Sardinia]

@Toooldforms If you are going into your bachelor's with this mind set then you are going to fail. First and foremost is that your thinking is disorganized. You want to get into medical school, you want to do it within a set time frame, and you are already contemplating taking an accelerated curriculum. These are all terrible criteria to have which I'm sure other posters can elaborate on when they are ready to actually offer you realistic advice. This type of thinking is analogous to children in early childhood who begin to role play as mommy and daddy. They pretend that they are running ten tasks at once because they don't have an understanding of the process. However, this is understandable for children because they have no understanding of how critical it is to have an understanding of how things work if you want them to work.

If you have a genuine passion in medicine, then why doesn't it stop there? Do I really need to figure out how you are going to make adcoms accept you when you failed a few classes, want to have kids, wasn't interested in academics the first time, and want to find a short cut to one of the most competitive graduate programs in the United States? Do you really expect other people to have the competency to actually factor in all those conditionals while providing you with a realistic answer? Have you noticed that most people have glossed over the specificities in your post and have just generalized you as being an older non-traditional student? It's quite alarming how many college recruiters are on SDN these days. YOU CAN DO IT. GET YOUR BACHELOR'S TODAY.

Second is the fact that you have unrealistic expectations based on the information that you failed a few classes. Anyone who failed a few classes and dropped out of college, but saw a House MD special on television can have a renewed interest in becoming a physician. Oh but I know what a thoracentesis is now because I looked it up on Wikipedia! Isn't this a sign of being passionate? No, not really. You have to realize that the percentage of students who do matriculate into medical schools have been passionate for years before you even got your game on. The fact that you are inquiring about accelerating the course load shows that you have a fragile understanding of what your competition really looks like and how much you need to perform in order to fulfill your so called, "genuine passion." Again, another case where the other posters can tell you about when they are ready to offer you realistic advice.

Maybe I'm jaded because we live in a world where the biggest employer is Walmart and minimum wage was never stipulated to put a roof over your head. Perhaps I am skeptical that you are still eligible for federal loans. When we live in a world where people have $10k to blow on ten classes that are at least $1k out of pocket then wake me up. I must be still having nightmares.

 

[libertyyne]

It's not to late. It's a personal decision you have to make. People have kids in medical school or have kids before medical school or during residency. If you have a supportive and understanding spouse it can all work out. This is a path that will take atleast a decade of hard work and the life after it is still no cake walk. Are you willing to put in that time?

 

[PB&Jam]

Serious question though: would anyone go to college if they hit the lotto big? I could match derm and if I hit the lotto big, I would quit that very second. Does that mean I don't love medicine or helping people? No, it just means that I love not having to work for a living more...

"But what would you do with your time?"

Drink and lay on the beach. Drink and lay on the beach...

Obviously I haven't had this experience (I wish lol) but I think I would still go to school/continue my job. If I were already working and won the lottery, I might just cut back on hours or take charity type cases and use the extra time (and money) to focus on hobbies I've had to sideline, like music and writing. I'm the sort of person who would go bat**** insane if I spent all my time "drinking and laying on the beach." I gotta be doing something meaningful, something challenging and stimulating.

 

[efle]

Serious question though: would anyone go to college if they hit the lotto big? I could match derm and if I hit the lotto big, I would quit that very second. Does that mean I don't love medicine or helping people? No, it just means that I love not having to work for a living more...

"But what would you do with your time?"

Drink and lay on the beach. Drink and lay on the beach...

A year ago, I would have said drink at the beach too. Now after a gap year job that is largely down time, I know I would go out of my ****ing mind. I need to be using my brain.

 

[libertyyne]

A year ago, I would have said drink at the beach too. Now after a gap year job that is largely down time, I know I would go out of my ****ing mind. I need to be using my brain.

I get terribly depressed if I don't have something meaningful to do or something intellectually stimulating. I would probably quit my residency and then enroll in a PhD program in engineering or open up a business if I hit the lottery tomorrow.

 

[Toooldforms]

@Sardinia

I ask about the accelerated course load, not for Med school, but bachelors I want to know if anyone was able to get it in 3 yrs instead of the four and how they did it. I have no problem taking my time, but being the daughter of immigrants there is a lot of pressure in regards to time. I'm not interested in generic advice, I came here looking for insight of those who have already been through the same thing.

Being a physician was something I have been interested in all my life, but for the past few years I was battling depression and other health issues and went into treatment for it this year.

 

[jcorpsmanMD]

@Sardinia

I ask about the accelerated course load, not for Med school, but bachelors I want to know if anyone was able to get it in 3 yrs instead of the four and how they did it. I have no problem taking my time, but being the daughter of immigrants there is a lot of pressure in regards to time. I'm not interested in generic advice, I came here looking for insight of those who have already been through the same thing.

Being a physician was something I have been interested in all my life, but for the past few years I was battling depression and other health issues and went into treatment for it this year.

Yes people have definitely completed their prerequites in 3 years but it will take great planning, heavy course loads and probably summer courses. If it's what you want, you can get it done. I wish you the best, don't be discouraged by the negativity that is often rampant on these forums. If you want it like you say you do. You can make it happen, just be diligent and work hard. Good luck!!

 

[Toooldforms]

Yes people have definitely completed their prerequites in 3 years but it will take great planning, heavy course loads and probably summer courses. If it's what you want, you can get it done. I wish you the best, don't be discouraged by the negativity that is often rampant on these forums. If you want it like you say you do. You can make it happen, just be diligent and work hard. Good luck!!

Thanks!

 

[PTPoeny]

I didn't have kids in medical school, I had two babies in residency but most of my friends had a kid in fourth year. Realistically that will be when you can put together the longest period of time off other than taking an unpaid leave of absence. But first and second year of medical school work well for some people and other people take a full year off to be with their kids.

Residency is hard. Having kids will make it harder but can be awesome at the same time. People make every arrangement under the sun work. If a program is willing you are allowed to split residency with another person. I've only known people to do this is Peds (but that is my specialty). You only get half the salary and your training is 6 years but the people I one that did it did childcare for each other too to eliminate that cost. I funny know if the family tone pressure will be better once you are a doctor.

Waiting until you are an attending will also not magically make having kids easier. Every single female attending in my fellowship had her husband stay home for a period of time. Depending on your practice model you may have no paid time off and a harder time arranging "light" work periods to start back as an attending. My advice is to have kids when you and your partner are ready no matter when that is in your career. But this is also tinged by my husband and I dealing with infertility for four years before I finally got pregnant and the heartbreak of not being able to afford to start treatment as a student and being forced to wait until residency.

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