No focus, severe brain fog, miserable life. Becoming frustrated.

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Garaygeree

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Well here it goes, I'm a Chemistry major, and a junior. Ever since I can remember, I have a severe case of brain fog. I remember in the good old days of Calculus I, II, III, Differential Equations, and Linear Algebra, brain fog wasn't a problem, because I'd look at the material and could instantaneously approach it or derive an equation on my own to solve it using theorems if I skipped class and didn't know what to do on a test. Gen Chem I and II was the same way. O-Chem was okay, but because it had a lot of 3-D visualization, I faired well.

I'm scared this is going to interfere with me when I take my filler "pre-med bio semester" (pretty much means I have an extra semester to screw around and still graduate on time, meaning I'm going to take bio classes beyond Bio I, II, Genetics, and micro to prepare me) next Spring of 2014:

-Human Physiology (Bio class)
-Pharmacology (Biochem class)
-Biochemical Genetics (Biochem class)
-Enzymology (Biochem class)
-Developmental Biology (Bio class)

However, for large arrays of text, like in my biochemistry class, humanities, etc. I just feel lost sometimes and I have to push myself to focus. I don't think I have a reading disability. I know I write really well. There's no language barrier. English is my first language, but my parents are immigrants, so I'm a first generational. I don't know if that has anything to do with accustoming to a different environment.

Sometimes even when driving, I just have a massively foggy brain. I feel like my life ever since 9th grade has been on "autopilot", and I literally just walk around, take tests, and do academic material spontaneously on default. I'm a good speaker, I think I write pretty well, but the brain fog really interferes with reading.

Sometimes my brain fog turns into a color stream. Like every time I do chemistry, I literally imagine structures floating around in my head, each element has a color, like Hydrogen is always blue, Chlorine is yellow, Phosphorus is pink. Reactions make sounds in my head depending on the type of reaction. I've always been like this as a kid with any science subject in terms of color (physics, biology, etc. included) ever since like sixth grade.

I vented about this to my old psych professor and he said I might have mild aspergers, bipolar, or an autism of some sort? I don't know why because I'm very social with my friends, but I just lose a grip on thought process. Bipolar maybe, I do have a lot of mood swings (I'm a guy by the way).

I cannot stress how bad sometimes I feel like I'm just wandering and drifting around in real life. It hasn't impacted my intelligence, or at least I assume not. I have a high 3.8+ GPA, EC's, and a publication in thermochem as a second author. I know I can do things, it's just that the brain fog bothers me. I feel like sometimes I'm losing control of my life.

I sleep well, my diet is good, I take a multivitamin and fish oil. I don't eat fast foods, I eat enough carbs, fats, and proteins as is needed to keep me satisfied and for an ideal regular healthy body image. Not too fat, not too thin. I eat lots of fruits and vegetables. I don't know where this is coming from.

Sometimes I want to cry because I don't like the brain fog, it takes me sometimes up to 30 seconds to get into the gears of what I want to do or what I was thinking about. I'm too poor to afford a doctor's visit...don't know what to do. I'm 20.
 
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I am sorry to hear you are feeling so aimless and are having a hard time concentrating. You may be burning out. If your Fall 2013 schedule looks like your Spring 2014 schedule, you are loading up on insanely difficult coursework when you do not necessarily need to. While your course load and performance (GPA, EC's, publication) are very admirable and I can see that you can do it intellectually, you do not need to burn out and be depressed to get admitted to medical school. So even if you can handle it intellectually, if you are burning out and it is affecting your behavior and emotions, maybe step back a bit in terms of responsibility.

Of course, it be something else... but I tend to feel similarly when I am on the verge of burnout. That's just me and I'm just one guy reporting an anecdote.

The bottom line: I think you should see a professional and mention everything you have mentioned here. If you are a student, you should have health insurance or at least there should be some sort of health resources available at the school even if you aren't required to be insured as a full-time student. (I'm not sure where you are going to school.)
 
This could be a lot of things- genetic, environmental, or a combination of the two. I know money may be tough, but you should really discuss this with a psychiatrist.
 
Hey man,

I get what you are saying. You are doing every thing right in life and succeeding but just feel disconnected in a way.
I kind of know how you are feeling with the brain fog.
If you are already eating a solid diet then I would try some meditation. Meditation has given me the ability to turn on and off my presence when I need to.
Maybe find another meaning to give your life purpose, such as a higher power?

Altogether, you are extremely successful man! Keep it up and find purpose.

Also, there are drugs called nootropics that help with brain fog. I use oxyracetam on the daily. Check it out bro.
 
Even if you're poor, colleges require you to have some type of health insurance in order to attend (even if it's the one offered by the school). Visit your health center. They should have a doctor of some sort.
 
nemo123 said:
Even if you're poor, colleges require you to have some type of health insurance in order to attend (even if it's the one offered by the school). Visit your health center. They should have a doctor of some sort.
Click to expand...

This is false. I lost my coverage at 21 so my junior and senior year I didn't have insurance and it didn't matter. My mom is on welfare insurance and I don't qualify. (Before anyone mentions any of that)
 
nemo123 said:
Even if you're poor, colleges require you to have some type of health insurance in order to attend (even if it's the one offered by the school). Visit your health center. They should have a doctor of some sort.
Click to expand...

Sometimes this is a policy instituted by the university. In some states, such as New Jersey, full-time college students are required to have proof of insurance or have the cost of a group student insurance plan added to their tuition. This may just be mandated for public universities in NJ.. I can't remember.

For OP: Your college should have a student health services or a medical center. At the very least they should offer mental health services to students for liability reasons. MIT learned this lesson the hard way. Very slowly. Over and over again.
 
ciestar said:
This is false. I lost my coverage at 21 so my junior and senior year I didn't have insurance and it didn't matter. My mom is on welfare insurance and I don't qualify. (Before anyone mentions any of that)
Click to expand...

Hmm interesting...

wiloghby said:
Sometimes this is a policy instituted by the university. In some states, such as New Jersey, full-time college students are required to have proof of insurance or have the cost of a group student insurance plan added to their tuition. This may just be mandated for public universities in NJ.. I can't remember.

For OP: Your college should have a student health services or a medical center. At the very least they should offer mental health services to students for liability reasons. MIT learned this lesson the hard way. Very slowly. Over and over again.
Click to expand...

Well I think they learned it with Elizabeth Shin. Really crazy story and everything that unfolded there with her family suing MIT for over 20 million dollars. I'd definitely recommend anyone to read this: http://www.nytimes.com/2002/04/28/magazine/who-was-responsible-for-elizabeth-shin.html?pagewanted=all&src=pm

The article is long, but it's definitely a very interesting read. I believe after this, lots of colleges saw what happened with MIT and started instituting more developed counseling centers.
 
Do you exercise? Have a hobby? Maybe, you need to relax a little...
 
Garaygeree said:
I'm too poor to afford a doctor's visit...don't know what to do. I'm 20.
Click to expand...

You need to avail yourself of your school's health services. Consider it a number one priority, just as if your symptoms were physical -- you wouldn't ignore chronic dysfunction in any other part of your body -- is your mind really less important to you than the rest of it? Skimping on medical care due to money at this point is short-sighted -- this is an investment in your whole entire future.
 
[QUOTE="

Sometimes my brain fog turns into a color stream. Like every time I do chemistry, I literally imagine structures floating around in my head, each element has a color, like Hydrogen is always blue, Chlorine is yellow, Phosphorus is pink. Reactions make sounds in my head depending on the type of reaction. I've always been like this as a kid with any science subject in terms of color (physics, biology, etc. included) ever since like sixth grade.

[/QUOTE]

Do you have synesthesia?
 
o great
some premeds diagnosing a random person on the interweb with synesthesia..

go see a shrink

gl and you probably dont have synesthesia.

edit: and your old psych professor cant give u a diagnosis unless he holds a phd in clinical psychology or a md
 
Go to your school's learning or education center and ask for help.

Garaygeree said:
Well here it goes, I'm a Chemistry major, and a junior. Ever since I can remember, I have a severe case of brain fog. I remember in the good old days of Calculus I, II, III, Differential Equations, and Linear Algebra, brain fog wasn't a problem, because I'd look at the material and could instantaneously approach it or derive an equation on my own to solve it using theorems if I skipped class and didn't know what to do on a test. Gen Chem I and II was the same way. O-Chem was okay, but because it had a lot of 3-D visualization, I faired well.

I'm scared this is going to interfere with me when I take my filler "pre-med bio semester" (pretty much means I have an extra semester to screw around and still graduate on time, meaning I'm going to take bio classes beyond Bio I, II, Genetics, and micro to prepare me) next Spring of 2014:

-Human Physiology (Bio class)
-Pharmacology (Biochem class)
-Biochemical Genetics (Biochem class)
-Enzymology (Biochem class)
-Developmental Biology (Bio class)

However, for large arrays of text, like in my biochemistry class, humanities, etc. I just feel lost sometimes and I have to push myself to focus. I don't think I have a reading disability. I know I write really well. There's no language barrier. English is my first language, but my parents are immigrants, so I'm a first generational. I don't know if that has anything to do with accustoming to a different environment.

Sometimes even when driving, I just have a massively foggy brain. I feel like my life ever since 9th grade has been on "autopilot", and I literally just walk around, take tests, and do academic material spontaneously on default. I'm a good speaker, I think I write pretty well, but the brain fog really interferes with reading.

Sometimes my brain fog turns into a color stream. Like every time I do chemistry, I literally imagine structures floating around in my head, each element has a color, like Hydrogen is always blue, Chlorine is yellow, Phosphorus is pink. Reactions make sounds in my head depending on the type of reaction. I've always been like this as a kid with any science subject in terms of color (physics, biology, etc. included) ever since like sixth grade.

I vented about this to my old psych professor and he said I might have mild aspergers, bipolar, or an autism of some sort? I don't know why because I'm very social with my friends, but I just lose a grip on thought process. Bipolar maybe, I do have a lot of mood swings (I'm a guy by the way).

I cannot stress how bad sometimes I feel like I'm just wandering and drifting around in real life. It hasn't impacted my intelligence, or at least I assume not. I have a high 3.8+ GPA, EC's, and a publication in thermochem as a second author. I know I can do things, it's just that the brain fog bothers me. I feel like sometimes I'm losing control of my life.

I sleep well, my diet is good, I take a multivitamin and fish oil. I don't eat fast foods, I eat enough carbs, fats, and proteins as is needed to keep me satisfied and for an ideal regular healthy body image. Not too fat, not too thin. I eat lots of fruits and vegetables. I don't know where this is coming from.

Sometimes I want to cry because I don't like the brain fog, it takes me sometimes up to 30 seconds to get into the gears of what I want to do or what I was thinking about. I'm too poor to afford a doctor's visit...don't know what to do. I'm 20.
Click to expand...
 
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