Hope no one minds me bumping this old thread, but I have the same question as the initial poster. I'm one month into my last year of a miserable residency experience. It's not even so much that I hate EM as that I am in a program that is such a bad fit in every sense of the word. Burned out and situationally depressed don't even begin to describe how I feel. My adviser is bugging me to start putting together a CV and cover letter to look for jobs, and I just don't have it in me enough to care. My main focus is on clearing out of here as quickly as possible, without even passing go long enough to attend my graduation.
Initially I thought I'd do a fellowship and go into academic medicine. Now I don't think I'll end up doing either. I can't exactly imagine the administration at my program enthusiastically recommending me to their friends at other academic programs as a great addition to their faculty. I do still have interest in the fellowship, but I don't think I can handle going straight into another year of working 60+ hours on top of being a new attending, taking my boards, etc. It's obvious to me that I need to at least take this year off, and maybe next year too, before even thinking about applying for a fellowship.
So, I'm thinking about what to do in the meantime. Unfortunately, I can't afford to not work at all. I'd be ok with working part time even if it means taking a major pay cut. I'd be ok with doing urgent care. I'd be ok with stocking shelves at Walmart if that's what it comes to. I just don't want to be here, and I don't want to be working this much. But if I did do something part time that's not truly EM, like urgent care, will I still be able to do a fellowship later if I decide I want to? I don't want to have gone through the residency from hell and then wind up as a career urgent care doctor. :/
Also, avatarism, if you're still around, I'd really appreciate knowing what you decided to do.
I feel your pain. Take comfort in knowing that per several surveys you have what 2/3 of Emergency Physicians describe having some feeling of:
Burnout.
http://www.kevinmd.com/blog/2013/05/emergency-physicians-burning.html
In fact, if you didn't have some some element of it, then you would be the weird one. I realize that might not make you feel any better, but knowing you are far from alone, may.
The good news: there are many options for you to turn this around. Since I don't know you specifically, I can't tell you what to do, but here are some options:
1-Finish residency and take the job where you work the least shifts per month possible. I bet if you can find a job with less than 100 hours per month, you'll see things more clearly. You might realize you like EM much more when you are better rested, and when you are getting paid for your work, rather than your work putting money in your attending's pocket.
Most importantly, RENT, RENT, RENT so if your first job sucks you can peace out ASAP! You won't be stuck for three years like residency. And you'll be making enough money to pay a lease break penalty on an apartment if you need to jet. You're almost free!
2- Consider alternative fellowships, such as Palliative Care or Critical Care, or others which would allow you to essentially make a complete specialty change yet build on your hard work in EM without technically "leaving the specialty." Consider them because they
are so different from what you thought you'd ever do.
3-Think outside the box with non-clinical careers. Again, building on your EM background and training without "starting over."
http://www.nonclinicalcareers.com/
4-Being done with residency
absolutely is better than being a resident, in any form. It's not perfect, all easy, or without a learning curve, but definitely better. You'll find your "fit" somewhere. Some programs are just weird, and stuffy. It may not be you.
Just some ideas..
Good luck.
