omlette vs pancakes vs human excrement

[DocEspana]

So, I'm in morning rounds right now in my education. It's a north east mid tier private morning rounds. I now have a hard decision to make about the next step in my future. I've been accepted at three breakfast options. So let me know which one is best, the pros and cons, etc.

First there is omlettes. They come from the exclusive prestigious omlette cooking zone on the east. I also feel like there is great opportunities if I stay there for three meals because that's also the burritos zone for dinner.

Pancakes are in the Midwest of the hospital. Sure its not the east side of the kitchen but my family lives slightly closer to the panckakes than the omlettes. And pancakes are much cheaper. I realize that the third meal outcome is something of a mixed bag. Could be tangerine chicken night, or it could be vegan chili night. No one wants that, but I'm told if I eat vigorously and completely that ill get first pick of dinner, bit there is always the risk that dinner moves to a lottery system.

Of course I could always eat human excrement. I know there are some real questions about its "not for human consumption" status, and supposedly health inspectors might not let me into any restaurants or cafeterias ever again if I go for the human excrement... But Idk. The excrement really sells itself well.

I've asked plenty of people this before and they just scream at me "for the love of god anything but the excrement" or omlette > pancakes >>>> crap. But no one ever gives me statistical analysis done by experts in the field while in double blind taste test studies, so I'm going to disregard every advice I've ever been given as to the heirarchy of these three. What would you suggest SDN?

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[DocEspana]

Breaking character for a second: clearly morning rounds are dragging today.

 

[drgioiadds]

It all depends on your goals. Are you fat? Do you want to loose weight? Then Omelette is the way to go. Pancakes are too high in carbs--Don't be fooled that high carb low fat is healthy
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v8WA5wcaHp4&list=FL7st7hwjsbqi78z4IvVj4MQ&index=5&feature=plpp_video
Sure crap is cheap and the easiest to digest but do you really want to isolate yourself from every one else?

In sum omelette>crap>>>>pancakes.

 

[IamaBanana]

Well, when you compound all the breakfasts you're going to have over the rest of your life you need to consider that omelettes and pancakes are expensive and human excrement is free. And human excrement isn't so bad, lots of people have eaten human excrement and they're still alive. I mean yeah every now and then someone will come forward and remind us that human excrement really is crappy. Unfortunately breakfast gets expensive and since we're so limited in our food choices because we didn't go shopping recently we should probably be excited to have any food choices at all.

 

[HotandCold]

Well, as someone with a Nutrition degree, I can certainly advise you against eating feces.

If the pancakes are a whole wheat variant, eat those and take a multivitamin. The omelet, stacked well, is the way ta go. Really, anything but crap.

 

[aSagacious]

For these sorts of decisions you really should reference data from the primary literature. I cited the original sources for you:

 

[FutureDrB]

Personally, I have to jump on the bandwagon and go with everyone else on this: omlette > pancakes >>>> crap

Omlettes are the best choice in this scenario. They are an all-around wholesome option for both those living/practicing in rural areas, as well as those in urban settings. Their lectures can be a bit cheesy at times, but the diversity and options found in their overall profile must be considered. Plus, their reputation for academic greatness can be seen in the complimentary term "egg-head" often used to describe its' graduates.

While pancakes are considered the more "well-rounded" option, they are often sugar-coated and will not do you justice in the long run.

Lastly, human excrement, often considered to be "the ****" by some, has reputation for stinky labs. Plus, their school motto is just plain corny. Although I do hear they have a great swim team.

 

[Mbeas]

crap>>>>>>>>>omelette>=pancakes

 

[FrkyBgStok]

Please refrain from trolling. The Internet is serious business.

 

[DocEspana]

Please refrain from trolling. The Internet is serious business.

Really what I want is to have my thread directly between two "x vs y" threads. Especially if it can be two "x vs y vs z". I'm not just going for mockery, i'm going for meta.

 

[GIpremed]

So, I'm in morning rounds right now in my education. It's a north east mid tier private morning rounds. I now have a hard decision to make about the next step in my future. I've been accepted at three breakfast options. So let me know which one is best, the pros and cons, etc.

First there is omlettes. They come from the exclusive prestigious omlette cooking zone on the east. I also feel like there is great opportunities if I stay there for three meals because that's also the burritos zone for dinner.

Pancakes are in the Midwest of the hospital. Sure its not the east side of the kitchen but my family lives slightly closer to the panckakes than the omlettes. And pancakes are much cheaper. I realize that the third meal outcome is something of a mixed bag. Could be tangerine chicken night, or it could be vegan chili night. No one wants that, but I'm told if I eat vigorously and completely that ill get first pick of dinner, bit there is always the risk that dinner moves to a lottery system.

Of course I could always eat human excrement. I know there are some real questions about its "not for human consumption" status, and supposedly health inspectors might not let me into any restaurants or cafeterias ever again if I go for the human excrement... But Idk. The excrement really sells itself well.

I've asked plenty of people this before and they just scream at me "for the love of god anything but the excrement" or omlette > pancakes >>>> crap. But no one ever gives me statistical analysis done by experts in the field while in double blind taste test studies, so I'm going to disregard every advice I've ever been given as to the heirarchy of these three. What would you suggest SDN?

Well I'm glad you mentioned the burrito zone for dinner because I've heard of some omelets in my day and they've had nothing to do with the north east. Denver and southwest come to mind pretty quick but a north east omelet? Granted, I'm from the west so I could be biased or my omelet knowledge may be west-skewed. Maybe in philly you could go to gino's or pat's for an 'om wit' or 'om witout' or maybe there's a big cinnamon apple omelet in nyc or something bean and hash beef omelet in boston. Like I said, I'm just not familiar enough with NE omelets so I'm just gonna assume it's a ham and cheese omelet from the prestigious cooking zone.

Now with pancakes I took this as regular bisquick pancakes with maple syrup. That could be way off and as mentioned earlier the whole wheat would be very filling. The topping and mix-ns are crucial here. Will the pancakes have name brand or generic maple syrup? Will you have the option of spreading peanut butter on them? (Very filling btw) Will the pancakes have blueberries or chocolate chips mixed in to the batter? IMO when it comes to pancakes the details make a huge difference!

Couldn't tell you much about the fecal route. Yet. Let me finish my schooling (fingers crossed for GI fellowship someday) and I'm sure I'll know all about it. But consider whose fecal matter it is. Sure some freaks would sign up for celebrity dookie and pay a hefty amount for it but if this is some drifter's excrement scraped up from the tavern bathroom floor would you really consider it a high value? Does it have good plate appeal?. DocE you mentioned that the excrement sells itself well. That in itself sounds like a huge accomplishment. Something like being able to sell ice to Greenland. Once again, look at the details. (The earlier post about the corniness of the motto, etc cracked me up)

So based on my basic assumptions of small ham and cheese omelet on a fancy plate, plain pancakes with generic maple syrup, or some random pile of excrement (lukewarm) I'd say
1-omelet 2- pancakes 3- excrement

 

[IamaBanana]

Really what I want is to have my thread directly between two "x vs y" threads. Especially if it can be two "x vs y vs z". I'm not just going for mockery, i'm going for meta.

I'm replying just so it won't be.

Trolls trolling trolls. Now that's meta.

 

[Dharma]

Go with the pancakes... you can always make your own $#!+ from there and still dabble if you so choose.

 

[ManBroDude]

You wouldn't eat a poop hotdog, would you?

 

[Iliketoytles]

Pancakes... because only a fool would pass up aunt jemima.

 

[UpwardTrend]

Pancakes... because only a fool would pass up aunt jemima.

I follow a primal diet. I miss my untie at times. I'd choose the omelette.

 

[drgioiadds]

I follow a primal diet. I miss my untie at times. I'd choose the omelette.

Primal blueprint is the way to go if you can do it!!

 

[Mbeas]

You wouldn't eat a poop hotdog, would you?

I think it's time to bump that thread

P.S. Just noticed your new username

 

[UpwardTrend]

Primal blueprint is the way to go if you can do it!!

👍+1

 

[Iliketoytles]

Primal blueprint is the way to go if you can do it!!

I wasn't sure what a primal blueprint was (I should've guessed from the name)... so I looked it up:

"...the Primal Blueprint works as a broad, holistic approach to living and not simply a list for eating"

Does this not have osteopathic written all over it? 🙄

 

[drgioiadds]

Its written by Mark Sisson a former marathoner/triathlete. Its a little extreme, but the main idea is that grains are "bad" for you--cause inflammation. We should eat and act like our ancestors--protein and fat along with fruits and veggies. He's also not a fan of chronic cardio for exercise. I am not that extreme, but I think his plan does have some merit.

 

[drgioiadds]

BTW it is an ordeal to change your username and can't be done unless you are a donor!

 

[Iliketoytles]

Its written by Mark Sisson a former marathoner/triathlete. Its a little extreme, but the main idea is that grains are "bad" for you--cause inflammation. We should eat and act like our ancestors--protein and fat along with fruits and veggies. He's also not a fan of chronic cardio for exercise. I am not that extreme, but I think his plan does have some merit.

Yeah there is some merit to it. They found that our ancestors rarely ever had to deal with cancer and other common issues that plagues our modern world... though, some of it can be attributed to modernization and not all diet.

Nonetheless, I suppose it's like the keto-diet that body builders often do? I'm no body builder... I just like to read the science behind this stuff. Speaking of protein... I have some chicken downstairs with my name on it.

 

[drgioiadds]

I can do keto for about one week max. I do do it every now and then. I'm more into food timing as opposed to eliminating food groups. That being said, I do tend to limit grains.

 

[DocEspana]

Yeah there is some merit to it. They found that our ancestors rarely ever had to deal with cancer and other common issues that plagues our modern world... though, some of it can be attributed to modernization and not all diet.

Nonetheless, I suppose it's like the keto-diet that body builders often do? I'm no body builder... I just like to read the science behind this stuff. Speaking of protein... I have some chicken downstairs with my name on it.

1. Stop detailing ny nonsense thread with actual medicine.

2. That diet is used as an example of a 'bad diet' when you get to med school and discuss diets and biochemistry of metabolism. It's very effective in the short term and even gets you enough vitamins... But it also induces a stress response chronically and thay causes fat growth long term (the fat friendly aspects of this really dont help slow that either)

3. While we are on cancer: its a disease of the genetically cursed and the old. Nothing (except gleevac) can save you if your genetics screwed you. And cavemeb never lived past 40. The only way you're getting any cancer, regardless of anything, before 50 is to smoke 4 packs a day from birth, roll around in cherynoble mud, or eat a mammal meat heavy diet. The cavemab diet only protects from cancer in that if you were a caveman you could eat whatever the hell you wanted, you'd never live long enough to develop any adult cancers.

 

[UpwardTrend]

I stay out of keto by eating around 100g of Carbs per day all from nuts and certain veggies/fruits. When I started I wasn't trying to lose weight but I did. I didn't think I had any to lose. I am guessing the fat I lost was packed around my organs.

 

[Iliketoytles]

I stay out of keto by eating around 100g of Carbs per day all from nuts and certain veggies/fruits. When I started I wasn't trying to lose weight but I did. I didn't think I had any to lose. I am guessing the fat I lost was packed around my organs.

 

[rafman]

Liking the new avatar pic Doc, I'm guessing its your new permanent one?

 

[ManBroDude]

It's do easy a cavemab can do it!

And yeah, they didn't live past 40. Hell, the causes of death that plagued humans 80 years ago practically don't exist anymore. Polio, smallpox, and malaria you don't hear about anymore, and has sadly been replaced with lifestyle causes: CAD and lung cancer from obesity and smoking.

 

[UpwardTrend]

LOL I love the helmet! He reminds me of the late Wesley Willis.

 

[MRSAful Fate]

Feces is quite high in fiber, I wouldn't count that option out.

 

[randomusername]

Maybe you can get into pancakes and transfer to waffles halfway through?

 

[DocEspana]

Maybe you can get into pancakes and transfer to waffles halfway through?

 

[DocEspana]

Liking the new avatar pic Doc, I'm guessing its your new permanent one?

I'm considering it. I have a few I want to toy around with. The solid black background had a simplistic feel and i liked it. I wonder if the full spanish background is too busy (yea i know. three bars of color. too busy. I am being picky). But it looks like this might be the permanent one unless i stumble onto something better soon.

 

[UpwardTrend]

You need bacon.😎 (low sodium, without phosphates or nitrates of course)

Hey, don't poke at the primal diet when you were contemplating a code brown sandwich earlier 😀

Ya, I can't sleep either.

 

[drgioiadds]

👍

You need bacon.😎 (low sodium, without phosphates or nitrates of course)

Hey, don't poke at the primal diet when you were contemplating a code brown sandwich earlier 😀

Ya, I can't sleep either.

 

[Iliketoytles]

You need bacon.😎 (low sodium, without phosphates or nitrates of course)

Hey, don't poke at the primal diet when you were contemplating a code brown sandwich earlier 😀

Ya, I can't sleep either.

Genetically modified bacon, enriched with healthy omega-3 fats. Possibly some golden rice with large amounts of vitamin A. Follow this with some vitamin-enriched chocolate milk squeezed straight from the udder of a GM cow, and you'll be set for the day.

 

[dntke1518]

Genetically modified bacon, enriched with healthy omega-3 fats. Possibly some golden rice with large amounts of vitamin A. Follow this with some vitamin-enriched chocolate milk squeezed straight from the udder of a GM cow, and you'll be set for the day.

Speaking of bacon, there is a big billboard around my area in Des Moines that says that bacon causes rectal cancer. I'm sure FrkyBigStok will add to this, but I find it quite amusing and will go drive by it tonight just so I can take a picture and post it.

Oh and I was wondering, if I can't go pancakes, can I go with Crêpes? I know that they are the same thing as a pancake, but I've heard they aren't as accepted in the US, but it would be easier to fork...

 

[dntke1518]

Thank god for google, saved me some gas...

This is what the billboard looks like, it is located at 6000 Douglas Ave in Urbandale/Des Moines

 

[Loudster]

I wish my bacon came in a box like that. It would be so handy for those times when I'm on the go and need a hit...

 

[FutureDrB]

I wish my bacon came in a box like that. It would be so handy for those times when I'm on the go and need a hit...

👍