- Joined
- Jun 25, 2013
- Messages
- 734
- Reaction score
- 315
I am overhauling my personal statement and I have written the new intro paragraph. Its short and to the point regarding what sparked medicine, but my friend believes its too vague. He believes that it needs something that grabs onto people, like a crazy anecdote. I only made it vague in order to encompass ALL the reasons I wanted to talk about in a thesis. I plan on giving specifics and grab the attention but only later on in the essay. What is the best way to go about this?
Last edited: