I am wrestling with the exact same issues as Febrifuge, except that like emedpa, I too am Daddy to two baby boys and want to remain an active part of their lives.
Feb and I are the same age (34), are considering the same post-bacc program (Bennington), and seem torn between careers for many of the same reasons. Like you Feb, the list of "Ifs" you mention would seem to make my decision incredibly easy for PA (that is "IF" they are realistic, and I think they are). I too appreciate the roll of PA in patient care, love the schedule and specialty flexibility, and have an interest in teaching as well (and policy; maybe an MPH after PA).
But will I feel a ceiling not being a Doc; being the leader of the team, able to private practice and define the character of my practice--and once the kids are a bit older will I regret having not pushed now, when the opportunity has laid itself right before me (though obviously not without massive sacrifice).
I am desperately torn betwen MD/DO and PA. Then I read emedpa's posts and think that PA was made for me (many thanks to you EMedPA for your excellent posts both here and at physicianassociates.com). Yes I want patient interaction; yes I want to feel a degree of autonomy along with the on-going intellectual challenge of medicine; and yes I think I NEED the family time that PA both immediately offers and can continue to offer throughout the next decade of my life. Add the evolving and inherent on-the-job-training, residencies, ability to change specialties, fine financials, lower liability and the career looks like almost a perfect fit. Then factor the looming dread I have about committing to med school which is basically, my innocent 2year old who still thinks that I can kiss and make it better will be a frighteningly independent 10 year old and my 10 month old's formative years will be a total blur for me. Can I do that?
But the doctor thought and my damn ego. Having had a successful run as a technology producer for broadcasters during the dotcom times and ending up with a horribly hollow feeling in my soul, I can't afford to make this decision not be the right one. Knowing (we all know it deep down right?) that I can make into and out of med school, can I deal with not doing it. Will it haunt me in my mid-forties that I could've done it only to feel like maybe it's too late. Of course if I'm first assist on surgeries or loving the relationships I have with my patients in either FP or peds (yes call me crazy but I have an affinity for peds), AND teaching or working on policy, will I be too busy and happy to care?
I'm sorry that this turned into a stream-o-consciousness rant. In some ways I love my wife for saying, "this is your decision" even though I know it's not. It's about the decision I need to make to maintain a felicitous homeostasis in my life--which includes my whole family. In some ways I wish she would tell me what she wishes I would do...alas.
emedpa, thanks again for all your posts...you are a terrific ambassador for the PA profession. And Feb, one way or the other we'll figure things out. For the time being though just know that when considering my options I greatly envy that you don't have kids...I love mine (amazing understatement) but this decision would be easier without their missed soccer games in the equation.
Leaning very much towards PA,
OckhamsRzr