Hi raiderj,
I'm a first-year vet student at CSU, 36 weeks pregnant with a 21-month-old toddler. There's another girl in my class who is also pregnant, she's about 29 weeks. For anatomy lab we wear masks that filter the formalin fumes and nitrile gloves that are impermeable to formalin. Downside - we have to talk really loudly to be heard through the masks and leave lab with red marks on our faces 🙂 I had a fair amount of nausea for the first four months, but there's a lot of things you can do to help with that, and not everyone gets morning sickness. I've been pretty tired throughout this pregnancy, so I get up early to study and take advantage of every free period (lunch, days when we start class later or end earlier) to study at school...by the time I get home, hang out with my toddler and husband, have dinner, do her bath and bedtime, and get the house straightened up it's usually 8 p.m. and I'm too tired to do much hardcore learning...I just review notes or work on quizzes or make flashcards. Weekends are usually one family day and one day of studying. I'm tremendously fortunate to have a very involved and supportive husband and in-laws that live nearby...the in-laws watch the toddler while I'm at school and will watch the new baby. There are people in my class who don't have family in the area...they use traditional day care, help each other out and do most of their studying from 9-midnight and during naps on weekends (for work reasons both of their husbands are gone the majority of the time). I know they would like to be able to study more, but they're holding their own and will be vets in the end. In general the faculty is supportive and understanding about balancing family and school. Several professors have said flat out that school, while important, comes second to family; another offers her private office to students who are breastfeeding so they can pump in comfort. There is an attendance policy that's pretty well set in stone, but its parameters are reasonable. Obviously I can only speak to my personal experience at CSU...the attitude may be very different at other schools.
Personally I think the first two years are better than the last two years for having kids...at least at CSU, they're primarily lectures and a few labs so you have a consistent schedule, don't have to be on your feet as much and aren't exposed to some of the occupational hazards involved with clinics (radiology, anesthesia, etc).
There are definitely some trade-offs for being a parent and a student...I haven't done as much club stuff as I would like because the meetings are in the evenings and I don't like to miss dinner and bedtime at home; same with a lot of the club wetlabs that are scheduled on the weekends. Time management gets ridiculously tight sometimes...there are days when ALL of my non-class time is scheduled. There is often very little "me" time. I feel really bad about having to leave my newborn with my husband, mom and in-laws for the last three or four weeks of this semester, but that was an error in timing we have to deal with. I'll spend this summer at home with my kids instead of working or doing externships or otherwise gaining vet experience; next summer will likely be a balance between the two. The upside is that kids give you a lot of perspective and keep you from being consumed by school. Some people like to be consumed and be driven by a single focus...if that's you, think long and hard about whether you're willing to ease up on that to make adequate room for kids.
I apologize for the length of this reply...there's a lot to consider on the subject, and when I was pre-vet and looking for this kind of info I found it very hard to come by. The bottom line, in my humble opinion, is that you can be both a parent and a student, but there are trade-offs and sacrifices to be made in both arenas, and spousal support is crucial. One final thought...there are people who believe that doing both is folly, that vet school is way too demanding and rigid to accomodate parenthood, that you can't be a good parent and a good student...you have to look at your individual situation and yourself and decide what's right for you. Vet school is tough, no doubt, but it does not have to be the all-consuming monster that some make it out to be. Good luck with whatever you decide!
