RANT HERE thread

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Stroganoff said:
What hasn't been mentioned is all the legal benefits and assumptions, like medical power of attorney to make decisions and a ton of other things that I don't know because I'm not a lawyer. Those don't normally come with the territory for those who are just cohabitating but not legally married.
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can't you get a durable PoA for healthcare without getting married tho?
 
Stroganoff said:
What hasn't been mentioned is all the legal benefits and assumptions, like medical power of attorney to make decisions and a ton of other things that I don't know because I'm not a lawyer. Those don't normally come with the territory for those who are just cohabitating but not legally married.
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Oh those are definitely benefits (and pretty much the only reasons I'm down with the idea of marriage eventually - just no wedding pls). I was more curious about how people were saying it changed the actual relationship dynamics. I maintain that its actually the cohabiting, not the legal title of marriage, is the thing really changes things (and they don't always go hand in hand) - but that's my opinion obviously. So I was curious to learn.

Medical power of attorney especially. I don't need ANYONE in my blood family making medical decisions about me. **** no.
 
WhtsThFrequency said:
Oh those are definitely benefits (and pretty much the only reasons I'm down with the idea of marriage eventually - just no wedding pls). I was more curious about how people were saying it changed the relationship dynamics.
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With my husband it made things more permanent. There is no "easy" way out. Everything has legal attachments plus we have a child. I never felt like we shared that during our dating phase. But it varies between relationships so who knows? It is different for everyone.
 
KCgophervet said:
I believe there's a rule around these parts that all adorable pets must be shared (at least pictures) with the rest of us 😉
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pupperson.jpg


Pupperson kept running in front of every car that drove down this street and stopping (as if he'd gotten abandoned). It was getting dark, and I'm like "OK, someone's gonna hit this dude." So I pulled over and let him in my car. He was so smol he couldn't jump in, so I assisted. I got to keep him for about a week (and nobody claimed him despite the flyers I put up). I realized that working full-time and being a full-time student (summer classes) were not really compatible to raising a puppy (holy crap, high-maintenance), so I sadly had to find him a new home. But at least he didn't get kilt that night 'cuz some douche dumped him off.
 
Stroganoff said:
View attachment 246497

Pupperson kept running in front of every car that drove down this street and stopping (as if he'd gotten abandoned). It was getting dark, and I'm like "OK, someone's gonna hit this dude." So I pulled over and let him in my car. He was so smol he couldn't jump in, so I assisted. I got to keep him for about a week (and nobody claimed him despite the flyers I put up). I realized that working full-time and being a full-time student (summer classes) were not really compatible to raising a puppy (holy crap, high-maintenance), so I sadly had to find him a new home. But at least he didn't get kilt that night 'cuz some douche dumped him off.
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You are a good person, make sure you notify the authorities so that if someone is looking for him he can be claimed
 
PrincessButterCup said:
Finances have been the one thing they've really had disagreements over.
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I'm so paranoid about this (divorce, divorce due to finances or other incompatibility). Couples should be comfortable discussing this, discussing their entire financial picture, philosophy, and goals. I'mma lay all this out even before thinking about engagement.
 
I will say, my hubby and I were friends before anything else. We would talk and laugh and console each other...then decided to date...then live together...then get married...and that really is the foundation for us. I know that I can talk to him, and if he has his hearing aids in, he listens. 🙂 😛😛 seriously, he is awesome...and I really believe that is because we were friends first.
 
killerleaf said:
I will say, my hubby and I were friends before anything else. We would talk and laugh and console each other...then decided to date...then live together...then get married...and that really is the foundation for us. I know that I can talk to him, and if he has his hearing aids in, he listens. 🙂 😛😛 seriously, he is awesome...and I really believe that is because we were friends first.
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After 17 years of dating, my current SO is the only one I have been friends with first for any significant amount of time. We also worked together for almost 3 years before something just kinda....changed. I still don't know what the impetus for said change was. Maybe the first time we played tennis together or something. It just sort of happened one day and we both looked at each other differently.

Maybe it bodes well.
 
Stroganoff said:
What hasn't been mentioned is all the legal benefits and assumptions, like medical power of attorney to make decisions and a ton of other things that I don't know because I'm not a lawyer. Those don't normally come with the territory for those who are just cohabitating but not legally married.
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SkiOtter said:
can't you get a durable PoA for healthcare without getting married tho?
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Stroganoff said:
Yeah, I'm sure all the legal things have their own equivalents. It's just with marriage they're built-in and assumed; otherwise you gotta do all the paperwork if unmarried.
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Just wanted to add that we found our PoA for healthcare has a lot less of a pull than you would think. When my grandma was first diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, my grandparents made my mom and two of my uncles PoA for her, in case something happened to him. They went to a family law attorney that swore it would allow basically all medical decisions for my grandma even once she wasn’t able to legally give consent on her own. We’ve had a lot of issues since my grandpa passed that he never had. I don’t think I’d ever count on a medical PoA to be as secure as the legal things that come along with being married.
 
ANNOUNCEMENT

I appreciate how many people are in line for my flagpole. We are not affected by the government shutdown at this time (though you will need to provide your own folding chairs if hitting your opponent with them is included in your flagpole strategy).

I am taking a sabbatical from the flagpole this week to show my demons all of the Rocky movies, so the flagpole is free at this time.

If there is disagreement over who should be first in line for the flagpole...take it to the flagpole.

Thank you,

Flagpole Team
 
vetmedhead said:
ANNOUNCEMENT

I appreciate how many people are in line for my flagpole. We are not affected by the government shutdown at this time (though you will need to provide your own folding chairs if hitting your opponent with them is included in your flagpole strategy).

I am taking a sabbatical from the flagpole this week to show my demons all of the Rocky movies, so the flagpole is free at this time.

If there is disagreement over who should be first in line for the flagpole...take it to the flagpole.

Thank you,

Flagpole Team
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@WildZoo guess we are back on
 
ArizonaSkye said:
Why don't you like it?
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Well several things. I was shadowing at a vet and getting lots of cool experiences despite them being a little slower in business. But I was so tired of my friends around me all being involved in big fancy jobs and making money. And here I was mooching/helping my mom with siblings while not working and just shadowing. So I found out about a VA position with a company for mobile clinics. I thought it would be neat! But it isn’t. They have so many stringent rules that don’t make sense, and they say the vet has the last say but I got in trouble last weekend during an audit when a vet told me to not put a harness thing on a fractious cat bc it would make it worse and if I could just scruff the cat well, we’d finish up. And so the lady doing the audit said something to me afterwards even though she heard the veterinarian give me direction. And then left it open ended if I should follow the rules over the immeadiate direction of the veterinarian. Ugh this is just the first story, I’ve only worked four days guys.
 
dolphin106258 said:
.
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Well I'm sorry that sounds terrible. I wish I knew what I could say to make it better. Just sounds like a crappy job. Hopefully things will get better for you. Again, I'm sorry I don't have better advice for you. That really sucks.
 
vetmedhead said:
ANNOUNCEMENT

I appreciate how many people are in line for my flagpole. We are not affected by the government shutdown at this time (though you will need to provide your own folding chairs if hitting your opponent with them is included in your flagpole strategy).

I am taking a sabbatical from the flagpole this week to show my demons all of the Rocky movies, so the flagpole is free at this time.

If there is disagreement over who should be first in line for the flagpole...take it to the flagpole.

Thank you,

Flagpole Team
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@finnickthedog we can finally take @Teepster87 to the flagpole and fite
Pretty sure he was the one we’ve been waiting in line for 2 years to fite.
 
vetmedhead said:
I'm tempted to make a Flagpole thread for people to bring and/or schedule off topic arguments, discussions, and beefs

AKA a thread where the chili argument can permanently live lol
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But but. I enjoy bringing the chili argument to random threads when least expected.
 
Literally no difference in my relationship after getting legally bound besides I get some freaking fantastic health insurance through my partner. 👍

Had been together for 9 yearsish, living together (beyond a couple month jaunts to foreign countries) for the previous 5.

Moving in is way bigger. I'm sure children and such are too and it AMAZES me that people don't have conversations about kids like, first couple months of a relationship. If one person wants a big family and the other hates kids, IT AIN'T GONNA WORK, next.

I know multiple married people who never had that conversation and it blows my freaking mind.
 
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