Should I give up on being premed? (Not based on a bad grade or low MCAT, I promise, haha)

[DrDre2017]

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It's late, so sorry if this doesn't make sense. I've been officially "premed" for almost two years, but lately, I've been doing a lot of introspection about whether I really want to become a doctor.

What’s really holding me back is the fact doctors have to be confident, able to communicate, lead, and make decisions. They have to be able to take criticism and be able to handle a great deal of stress, as well as deal emotionally with others' pain and suffering.

I don't possess any of these traits. For a while, I had the idealistic hope that the years of schooling and training would develop me into the kind of person that would be a competent physician. I really want to be that kind of person. But now I'm wondering if I’ll end up breaking instead of adapting. Plus, medical schools want students who already have these characteristics, and I must face the very real possibility that I won't even make it into medical school solely because of my personality.

So... Should I just give up? I'm hesitant because 1. My parents are really pushing for medical school and guilt-tripping me by bringing up how much money they've spent for me to go to a really good school. 2. So many people believe in me. And 3. I don't know what else I would do.

My whole freshman year was filled with this same kind of uncertainty, which I tried to deal with by making appointments with academic advisors, department advisors, premedical advisors, at least two student mentors, and the career center. Not to mention scouring SDN and student blogs for hours upon hours. I devoted all of my free time to finding some sort of epiphany, didn't do any extracurriculars, and was overall miserable. I don’t want to spiral back into that.

Moreover, I often angst about tough decisions with no clear answer. Usually, I end up doubting my own capabilities, choosing the “safer” option, and then regretting it deeply. So that’s why I’m hesitant to take myself seriously right now.

TLDR; I don’t know if I’m cut out to be a doctor, and what I’d do otherwise. There are many reasons why I’m reluctant to act based on my reservations. I know that most people are set on being premed, and this is a question I must ultimately answer myself. But if I need to go somewhere for make-me-cry truth, I know I can count on SDN, lol. If someone has advice or just wants to offer an objective perspective, I’d appreciate it.

 

[MusicDOc124]

To keep it short and simple - I know a lot of people who feel/felt that way prior to starting and even while they're still in M1/M2, and in some cases starting in M3. It's not an uncommon thing. These characteristics can also develop. Maybe you just need more/different exposure to develop those characteristics. I wouldn't sell yourself short without looking into it further. Another option if you want to be in the medical field without AS MUCH responsibility is PA or possibly nursing.

That's just my .02 though

 

[mr.mkitty]

I think that if you are fairly uncertain whether trying to become a doctor is what you should do before you even take the MCAT, I'd consider a different field to pursue.
I say this simply because I would've never been able to passionately and endlessly study for the MCAT had I not been set on becoming a doctor.
What I'm about to say may seem logical, but I've noticed that people who aren't set on becoming a doctor and are okay with a backup plan typically end up doing worse on the MCAT (Duh).
So, if this is you, just consider that!

 

[whatever5]

I think there's something for everyone in medicine - basically, if you don't see yourself being happy doing something else, try for medicine and you can learn the skills you need to along the way. If you think you'd be happy doing something else, by god save yourself the trouble and do it.

 

[Hospitalized]

There's a reason why medicine is a practice, not a perfect science. There's a lot of uncertainty; embrace it and challenge yourself!

 

[mcatjelly]

OP: have you ever been in a position where you're a leader? In a great amount of stress? Dealing with others' pain and suffering?

If not, start doing those things now! What you're saying about yourself is what I said about myself when I was around the same age, but 4ish years later I'm almost unrecognizable compared to my younger self because of all the new experiences I forced myself to pursue. So give yourself a chance to be all of those things before you count yourself out. 🙂

 

[MyNameWasUsed]

Do computer science, accountant, engineering, or finance. You can graduate in 4 years and make good money. Enjoy life man.

 

[DrDre2017]

Thanks for the advice guys!

OP: have you ever been in a position where you're a leader? In a great amount of stress? Dealing with others' pain and suffering?

If not, start doing those things now! What you're saying about yourself is what I said about myself when I was around the same age, but 4ish years later I'm almost unrecognizable compared to my younger self because of all the new experiences I forced myself to pursue. So give yourself a chance to be all of those things before you count yourself out. 🙂

Leader? No. In a great amount of stress? I guess, if you count school-related stress, then definitely, haha. Dealing with others' pain and suffering? I started volunteering at a hospital recently, but it's hard to throw myself into social situations, especially by myself (e.g. taking the initiative to go into a patient's room and ask if they need anything without a nurse). What new experiences helped you?

Do computer science, accountant, engineering, or finance. You can graduate in 4 years and make good money. Enjoy life man.

I forgot to mention that I'm a junior, which might change things. I think I'm on course to graduate on time as it is; I'm an Applied Math major, but not really interested in anything engineering or business-related.

 

[URHere]

Leader? No. In a great amount of stress? I guess, if you count school-related stress, then definitely, haha. Dealing with others' pain and suffering? I started volunteering at a hospital recently, but it's hard to throw myself into social situations, especially by myself (e.g. taking the initiative to go into a patient's room and ask if they need anything without a nurse). What new experiences helped you?

You can't be confident, make decisions, or take charge until you have some kind of expertise in whatever area you are talking about. In medicine, you can show some hints of these skills (especially in MS3/4), but most people will probably really develop these traits in residency.

That being said, I definitely have some classmates who are shy/indecisive/risk adverse to the point that I wonder about their abilities going forward. It won't help you all that much with medical school but my advice would be to get a job outside of medicine where you can see what the natural limits of your personality are. Want to see if you can handle stress and thinking quickly on your feet? Get a part time job in a restaurant. Want to see if you have what it takes to lead a group of people? Volunteer for a community outreach program (teaching at local schools, habitat for humanity, etc) and work your way up to a leadership role to see how you function when you're responsible for organizing other people. Need more confidence and better communication skills? Find a toastmasters group, join a debate team, etc.

None of these activities relate directly to medicine, but they will help you to build skills that will be invaluable whether or not you choose to become a physician. This is part of the reason why some medical schools value prior jobs and extracurriculars so heavily - maturity and well-roundedness aren't something you can learn from a book.

 

[eteshoe]

Having doubts is a normal. However, I would suggest you take a gap year or so before committing to med school and beyond. You have to come up with your own reasoning why being a physician is something you want to pursue, despite what your parents or whoever says so or tries to guilt you. This path requires sacrifice and there is no way another person can understand what that level of sacrifice means to you.

There's nothing wrong with starting off premed and deciding to do something you're more passionate about (passion will eventually give you the confidence you're talking about). But don't semi commit to this path because that will cause nothing but pain. Just some things to remember. Good luck with your decisions.

 

[mcatjelly]

Leader? No. In a great amount of stress? I guess, if you count school-related stress, then definitely, haha. Dealing with others' pain and suffering? I started volunteering at a hospital recently, but it's hard to throw myself into social situations, especially by myself (e.g. taking the initiative to go into a patient's room and ask if they need anything without a nurse). What new experiences helped you?

In college, I found an organization whose cause I was very passionate about. Went from quiet girl in the corner to president for two years. I forced myself to run for a position and my responsibilities required me to be social/assertive.

My gap years have been spent working at a psychiatric facility. I have no choice but to be around pain and suffering every day, to take charge in crises so my coworkers and I don't get hurt, and to lead treatment groups.

When I push myself to be social when it feels so unnatural, I don't use my future as motivation--I just think to myself, if I were in pain in a hospital, wouldn't I appreciate being talked to? Being acknowledged? Being treated like a human? Asking someone to get something for me without feeling like a burden? Not all patients want to be social, of course, which is why you don't force yourself upon them, but you are there to be their support.

 

[janeteyre]

It's late, so sorry if this doesn't make sense. I've been officially "premed" for almost two years, but lately, I've been doing a lot of introspection about whether I really want to become a doctor.

What’s really holding me back is the fact doctors have to be confident, able to communicate, lead, and make decisions. They have to be able to take criticism and be able to handle a great deal of stress, as well as deal emotionally with others' pain and suffering.

I don't possess any of these traits. For a while, I had the idealistic hope that the years of schooling and training would develop me into the kind of person that would be a competent physician. I really want to be that kind of person. But now I'm wondering if I’ll end up breaking instead of adapting. Plus, medical schools want students who already have these characteristics, and I must face the very real possibility that I won't even make it into medical school solely because of my personality.

So... Should I just give up? I'm hesitant because 1. My parents are really pushing for medical school and guilt-tripping me by bringing up how much money they've spent for me to go to a really good school. 2. So many people believe in me. And 3. I don't know what else I would do.

My whole freshman year was filled with this same kind of uncertainty, which I tried to deal with by making appointments with academic advisors, department advisors, premedical advisors, at least two student mentors, and the career center. Not to mention scouring SDN and student blogs for hours upon hours. I devoted all of my free time to finding some sort of epiphany, didn't do any extracurriculars, and was overall miserable. I don’t want to spiral back into that.

Moreover, I often angst about tough decisions with no clear answer. Usually, I end up doubting my own capabilities, choosing the “safer” option, and then regretting it deeply. So that’s why I’m hesitant to take myself seriously right now.

TLDR; I don’t know if I’m cut out to be a doctor, and what I’d do otherwise. There are many reasons why I’m reluctant to act based on my reservations. I know that most people are set on being premed, and this is a question I must ultimately answer myself. But if I need to go somewhere for make-me-cry truth, I know I can count on SDN, lol. If someone has advice or just wants to offer an objective perspective, I’d appreciate it.

Hey, this personal development stuff comes with time. You are still young, and I know it feels like that confident, mature individual you want to become is lightyears away. Everyone feels this way, and you will become that person (someone who will be able to deal with social, professional anxiety) with time. There's a lot of stuff you could do to accelerate this process ( I highly recommend regular aerobic exercise ), but you will get there.

 

[Lucca]

Not an adcom and just my personal opinion but if someone showed the self awareness you are and decided to delay their application to do something about their perceived deficits or concerns then I would want that person in my class.

 

[MusicDOc124]

To keep it short and simple - I know a lot of people who feel/felt that way prior to starting and even while they're still in M1/M2, and in some cases starting in M3. It's not an uncommon thing. These characteristics can also develop. Maybe you just need more/different exposure to develop those characteristics. I wouldn't sell yourself short without looking into it further. Another option if you want to be in the medical field without AS MUCH responsibility is PA or possibly nursing.

That's just my .02 though

Also, to be clear with what I said earlier, this is assuming you want to be a doctor. If you're not even sure of that, then certainly re-evaluate before entering.

 

[DrDre2017]

These are good ideas; I definitely plan to take a gap year or two to do some growing up and become more comfortable with doing the things that I find daunting right now. And I'll do some more shadowing and soul-searching about being a doctor specifically before I apply.

 

[GiantPanda1]

In my opinion, you don't seem to lack introspection and demonstrate great maturity. They say on the internet, under the guise of anonymity, you are who you truly are. Reading your past posts, just from seeing you post around, you would be a future colleague that I would love working with.

Confidence, communication skills and leadership abilities are not built overnight. If you believe you lack these characteristics, I would suggest being involved with something. Join an E-Board at a school club or start your own nonprofit. Toastmasters is a thing. Also, if you do research, find the opportunity to present your research in poster format. CV-wise it's worth a lot more in a publication but personal growth-wise, in a poster presentation, you have the opportunity to explain your research to people in-person. Even if its just an undergraduate research conference, it still provides invaluable experience. Also, consider getting a tutoring position. You can't be a good tutor without good communication skills. This also serves as additional non-clinical volunteer work or if you have bills to pay, a source of great income.

Whatever you decide in the end, do it with all your heart and remember, no one got anything done without a little bit of risk.