Should I still do residency if I didn't like clinical year, and I have other intense interests?

[ellealla]

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[Goro]

Finish the PHD and going to Academia or industry. Forget about medicine

 

[neoexile]

I am an MD/PhD student, done with a bunch of clinical rotations, now working on my PhD full time for a few years before I'll go back to finish the last few months of med school. I am very torn about whether I should do residency afterwards. I'm trying to remember the reasons I decided to do MD/PhD...because, I ended up really hating my clinical year. Med students are totally useless, and I knew I was no exception. Probably the most useful thing I did all year was bring patients extra blankets or juice (if they were allowed to have juice...) I also HATE sleep deprivation. I can feel my brain shutting down the more tired I become. I know that med school is a piece of cake compared to residency on the sleep-deprivation front, and I honestly think that the degree of sleep deprivation required in residency might be a deal-breaker for me, because the sleep deprivation of just med school drove me crazy. I literally don't know if I can do repeated call nights for 3+ years of residency without dying in a car accident from exhaustion. (if we forced prisoners of war to undergo the sleep deprivation that some residents I know have had to suffer, the public would be up in arms...but most of the public doesn't even have a clue what most doctors' schedules are like, so I guess that's why they aren't up in arms about it. That was a big shock for me - I thought that in 2018 we would've figured out a way for doctors to work marginally more reasonable hours than they actually do. I guess the government limiting the number of doctors that can be trained really complicates their schedules....but still! it's madness! Patients literally die as a result of the sleep deprivation that doctors are forced into, and it's not fair to the poor patients or to the poor doctors.) Anyway. There are also a lot of things I LOVE doing that I don't want to give up - for example, I love to write (it's hands down my favorite thing to do in the entire world) and I realistically won't be able to do that during residency. So...if I hated med school clinical year (a lot), how likely is it that I will also hate residency? It always seemed to me like my med school classmates LOVED their clinical rotations but maybe that was just BS so they could get good evaluations. ?????? Is it weird that I did NOT love it, and that I found a lot of the 'stand in the corner and don't get in the way' pretty boring? Are any of these thought processes normal???? I was SO EXCITED at the beginning of medical school, and I feel like clinical year sucked away all of my excitement. Maybe I was naive. I do want to help people, and medicine is a very unique way of helping people at some of their worst moments...I do find medicine extremely intellectually interesting...I think patients have interesting stories too. Then again, I also want to help the environment, and I also want to write, and I want to do research (the whole PhD thing), and I want to help animals (sometimes I think I love animals more than people; actually my initial plan was to do vet school before I changed my mind and decided to do MD PhD, but that's another story entirely.) Do I simply have too many interests??? after this much time in school, I thought I would have my whole career path figured out, but the longer I'm in school the less certain I feel about where I want to end up. I might regret it forever if I don't do residency and become a real doctor, but then again, I might regret it if I do. It's a big commitment. If I did do residency, I would want to do it well and do my best. I know I have a few years of PhD-ing left before I need to make up my mind, but it's driving me insane wondering what I'm going to do afterwards, and I still have nightmares sometimes about some stuff I saw during clinical year so it's not like I can just decide "never to think about it." I feel extremely lucky to have these life opportunities, and I don't want to waste them, but I don't want to be totally miserable either. any thoughts/advice from all you more experienced folks out there?????

My opinion is as follows. Clinical rotations are only a taste of the workload that a doctor has to deal with. You can end up in a "lifestyle" specialty or tailor your practice such that you can have a good life style. However, up until that point, you are gonna have to work hard for 3-5 years and even if you didn't want to work hard, medicine still is a 24/7 job. You have to keep yourself current with the latest literature and emergencies happen that need your attention.

I agree with Goro. Just go into business or industry with PhD. My friend started a business and he's making wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy more money than I'll ever see as a doctor.

 

[Anti-PD1]

Paragraphs man

 

[libertyyne]

why not do a residency in something that doesnt have a large degree of sleep deprivation? Family, Derm. The way I look at it is that you only have one chance to do this otherwise this door closes forever. You can always go back to academia or industry, but your likelihood of obtaining a residency will continue to go down as the years go on.

 

[neoexile]

why not do a residency in something that doesnt have a large degree of sleep deprivation? Family, Derm. The way I look at it is that you only have one chance to do this otherwise this door closes forever. You can always go back to academia or industry, but your likelihood of obtaining a residency will continue to go down as the years go on.

My problem is that he's not that passionate about medicine and that's problematic. If he doesn't like his job, not only will be unhappy, but it is gonna affect his fellow colleagues and patients. That's gonna suck badly.

 

[libertyyne]

My problem is that he's not that passionate about medicine and that's problematic. If he doesn't like his job, not only will be unhappy, but it is gonna affect his fellow colleagues and patients. That's gonna suck badly.

passion is something you do to your s/o. It is a job, he can treat it like a job.

 

[neoexile]

passion is something you do to your s/o. It is a job, he can treat it like a job.

Fair enough

 

[ellealla]

*she (I'm female). Yeah I was kind of alarmed when I didn't seem to love clinical year as much as some of my classmates. There were some things I did think were really cool, but overall, I woke up every day dreading it which is probably a red flag (unless that's a normal way to feel during med school?? *shrug* don't know what's normal anymore) The absolute last thing I want to do is hurt patients or be a mediocre doctor. There was one elective I really liked in clinical year. But, I didn't think it was MORE interesting than the various other things I like. Also, I figure that since I am lucky enough to get to choose a career direction, I should try to find something I'm really excited about. Part of the conundrum is that none of my current training directly translates to the future job - medical school is different from being an attending, and graduate school is different from leading a research team (either in industry or academia). I'm pretty sure I would really like leading a research team. I might also like being an attending...But not if the price is that I have to give up something else I care a lot about (like writing.) Honestly my favorite part about going to medical school so far has been that I can answer my family's extremely simple medical questions, and it feels good to do that. That (and the one elective I liked) are pretty much the only reasons I haven't given up on medicine entirely. I don't know if those are good enough reasons to stay in though...life is too short.

 

[ClinPathDO]

I am an MD/PhD student, done with a bunch of clinical rotations, now working on my PhD full time for a few years before I'll go back to finish the last few months of med school. I am very torn about whether I should do residency afterwards. I'm trying to remember the reasons I decided to do MD/PhD...because, I ended up really hating my clinical year. Med students are totally useless, and I knew I was no exception. Probably the most useful thing I did all year was bring patients extra blankets or juice (if they were allowed to have juice...) I also HATE sleep deprivation. I can feel my brain shutting down the more tired I become. I know that med school is a piece of cake compared to residency on the sleep-deprivation front, and I honestly think that the degree of sleep deprivation required in residency might be a deal-breaker for me, because the sleep deprivation of just med school drove me crazy. I literally don't know if I can do repeated call nights for 3+ years of residency without dying in a car accident from exhaustion. (if we forced prisoners of war to undergo the sleep deprivation that some residents I know have had to suffer, the public would be up in arms...but most of the public doesn't even have a clue what most doctors' schedules are like, so I guess that's why they aren't up in arms about it. That was a big shock for me - I thought that in 2018 we would've figured out a way for doctors to work marginally more reasonable hours than they actually do. I guess the government limiting the number of doctors that can be trained really complicates their schedules....but still! it's madness! Patients literally die as a result of the sleep deprivation that doctors are forced into, and it's not fair to the poor patients or to the poor doctors.) Anyway. There are also a lot of things I LOVE doing that I don't want to give up - for example, I love to write (it's hands down my favorite thing to do in the entire world) and I realistically won't be able to do that during residency. So...if I hated med school clinical year (a lot), how likely is it that I will also hate residency? It always seemed to me like my med school classmates LOVED their clinical rotations but maybe that was just BS so they could get good evaluations. ?????? Is it weird that I did NOT love it, and that I found a lot of the 'stand in the corner and don't get in the way' pretty boring? Are any of these thought processes normal???? I was SO EXCITED at the beginning of medical school, and I feel like clinical year sucked away all of my excitement. Maybe I was naive. I do want to help people, and medicine is a very unique way of helping people at some of their worst moments...I do find medicine extremely intellectually interesting...I think patients have interesting stories too. Then again, I also want to help the environment, and I also want to write, and I want to do research (the whole PhD thing), and I want to help animals (sometimes I think I love animals more than people; actually my initial plan was to do vet school before I changed my mind and decided to do MD PhD, but that's another story entirely.) Do I simply have too many interests??? after this much time in school, I thought I would have my whole career path figured out, but the longer I'm in school the less certain I feel about where I want to end up. I might regret it forever if I don't do residency and become a real doctor, but then again, I might regret it if I do. It's a big commitment. If I did do residency, I would want to do it well and do my best. I know I have a few years of PhD-ing left before I need to make up my mind, but it's driving me insane wondering what I'm going to do afterwards, and I still have nightmares sometimes about some stuff I saw during clinical year so it's not like I can just decide "never to think about it." I feel extremely lucky to have these life opportunities, and I don't want to waste them, but I don't want to be totally miserable either. any thoughts/advice from all you more experienced folks out there?????

Why not consider pathology and do a PSTP research track? I see from your posting your PhD is in computer science, there are fellowships in clinical informatics if your interested.

 

[Brorthopedic]

For a guy that loves to write, that was painful to read man. Use paragraphs.

As for the residency dilemma, just pick a specialty with a cush, short residency. Psychiatry and PM&R come to mind. You might find that the extra cash and low hours as an attending, with an ability to set your own schedule, will allow you to financially pursue other interests.

 

[Brahnold Bloodaxe]

Paragraphs man

Pffft, it was obvious OP was a girl. The probability of correctly identifying the gender of the author approaches 1 as the urge to post the following meme in response to the post approaches infinity.

 

[Goro]

Why not consider pathology and do a PSTP research track? I see from your posting your PhD is in computer science, there are fellowships in clinical informatics if your interested.

Read the post above yours again. The OP is miserable. Do really wish to inflict two more years of sufferings upon her?

I trust her feelings and it's time for her to bail.

 

[ellealla]

Pffft, it was obvious OP was a girl. The probability of correctly identifying the gender of the author approaches 1 as the urge to post the following meme in response to the post approaches infinity.

Ah, blatant sexism... Turns out my single biggest career mistake was being born a woman. Seriously though. Not cool.

 

[mehc012]

Nobody likes the med stuedent part. The only thing it costs you to try residency out in a field known for better schedules is the time/money spent on interviews. While I'll admit that's not trivial, it seems like a reasonable enough sum to gamble with, when the return is potentially keeping a door open that you won't otherwise have. Maybe you'll have a better time in clinic once you feel more useful and less like an unwanted wall fungus. Picking a more 'humane' residency program could help, too. And if you still don't like it, well...what's to stop you from walking away? Do you lose career options by spending a year or so in residency giving it a shot?

I honestly don't know the answers to a lot of those questions, but it seems worth considering.

 

[ClinPathDO]

Read the post above yours again. The OP is miserable. Do really wish to inflict two more years of sufferings upon her?

I trust her feelings and it's time for her to bail.

OP use state you completed a clinical year? Did you finish third year and your cores or have you just finished second year. If OP only has a year left she could do mainly non clinical electives, depending on the curriculum. As she’s MD-PhD those are usually funded. Would she also have to finish the MD part or have to repay her MD tuition? There are many individuals who hate clinical medicine who seek out non-clinical residencies. I wouldn’t shy away from finishing my MD if it’s for ten months of electives. You could do CP and a clinical informatics fellowships and be very happy in an in demand feild of medicine.

 

[Goro]

OP use state you completed a clinical year? Did you finish third year and your cores or have you just finished second year. If OP only has a year left she could do mainly non clinical electives, depending on the curriculum. As she’s MD-PhD those are usually funded. Would she also have to finish the MD part or have to repay her MD tuition? There are many individuals who hate clinical medicine who seek out non-clinical residencies. I wouldn’t shy away from finishing my MD if it’s for ten months of electives. You could do CP and a clinical informatics fellowships and be very happy in an in demand feild of medicine.

Hmm, many thanks for drawing that to my attention. I have to admit that I didn't read the OP's post carefully.

I agree that given how far OP has come, if they can simply grit and bear it for the final clinical parts of their education, they can make it better with the MD/PhD rather than just the PhD alone.

I was under the assumption that OP has finished the first two years of pre-clinical and was now in the PhD part. Mea culpa.

 

[ellealla]

To clarify, I'm basically done with medical school at this point and my main question is whether I should do residency after I graduate from MD/PhD, or instead do research full time... I can't tell whether I disliked clinical med school stuff because of being useless (also I refuse to suck up to people and that was the unspoken expectation) or if I disliked it for a more fundamental reason. There is a ton of pressure for me to do residency and it's also hard to step away from that and think objectively. I have heard commonly that I should do residency so I don't close any doors, but my main question is how I can figure out whether residency is even a door I want to open at all.

 

[ClinPathDO]

To clarify, I'm basically done with medical school at this point and my main question is whether I should do residency after I graduate from MD/PhD, or instead do research full time... I can't tell whether I disliked clinical med school stuff because of being useless (also I refuse to suck up to people and that was the unspoken expectation) or if I disliked it for a more fundamental reason. There is a ton of pressure for me to do residency and it's also hard to step away from that and think objectively. I have heard commonly that I should do residency so I don't close any doors, but my main question is how I can figure out whether residency is even a door I want to open at all.

You still have time to figure it out, I would recommend doing a PSTP Residency that way you could utilize your degree and keep doors open as well as continue with your research. You would still need to do a few years dost doc why not just do a research based residency?