I'm a third year and my SO is a year behind. We're both interested in EM, with good grades/ scores, and no red flags in our education. I am currently debating whether to take a year off to do research or extend my electives/international rotations, etc. But I can't make up my mind if I want to stay back a year because honestly, I would love to just graduate!
Does anyone out there have success stories of people who made it into the same program/ region matching a year apart? Or even your own personal stories about NOT matching into the same area because I understand that is also a strong possibility. Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks.
If you are not already married or not engaged to be married, then you should not make decisions with her in mind. A lot can change in a year and a half, and, honestly, it is better for you to move on (not from her, but with your career). Sure it would be cool to do nothing for ANOTHER year after 4th, do something "cool," but it will not be worth your time down the road. Being apart will (1) test your resolve (long distance is a great test of your relationship capacity) and getting out of residency and into a career focus / making real money will help with your future.
The benefit, of course, is that you will couples match. And, being able to rank combinations, are almost assured to get into a location where both of you will be. Not necessarily the same program, but same geographic area. Unless one of you doesnt match (and has to scramble) or you purposefully put combinations so that both of you match but are not together, you guarentee being in a city together. The downside is the time you lose.
I've seen now three failures doing both. One guy matched IM, his girlfriend Urology the next year. As soon as she got it, dumped him. They weren't in the same city. Another was the same thing; he in IM, she in derm a year later. She dumped him. They were in the same city.
Another story was when they DID wait, they DID couples match, and they STILL broke up.
Its why I say unless you are 100% committed to this person (i.e. for life, not just cause you have warm fuzzies being in a relationship) it isn't worth your time, your life, your lost income, your sacrficie, etc.
