To move away from thesis talks -
One of my girlfriend's friends decided she wants to move with me and my girlfriend to our new city. There are a myriad of reasons why I don't want this girl coming, but I'm disturbed by someone deciding that my MD-PhD sojourn should be used a jumping-off point for their life as well. She also wanted to accompany us on our apartment-hunting trip in a few weeks.
WHO INVITES HERSELF ON A LIFE-ALTERING DECISION? That puts me in the awful position of having to tell her "no". We went to dinner the other night, and she avoided the topic until the very end. I had to basically shoot down the idea completely without getting into the real reasons I don't want her going with us (extraordinarily unreliable, all-week partier, etc.).
It was brutal. I was hoping that she would just be pissed at me (as my GF didn't really say much/offered ideas over how it might work), but...damn. My girl just called and said her friend won't even look at her today (they work together).
This infuriates me. I worked my butt off for years to get in this position. I don't need people thinking "Hey! Inuranic is moving to a new city and will have a secure income. His girlfriend will be working full-time and bringing in money as well. They seem stable...how can I work this to my advantage?" I'm sure she meant well, but I refuse to be a halfway house for wayward girls who haven't decided what they want in life.
My favorite part of the conversation was when I said that if she was truly serious about moving to this place, then she was more than welcome to come down after we were settled and look for apartments/jobs using us as her base (temporarily). She goes "Well, I probably won't have the money for that..." but she's all for jumping in my car when I'm driving and paying for it, and piggybacking on whatever place I find to live in?!?!
This is why I avoid having friends. This is why I love you, SDN. You won't try to use me, right?
[rant][/rant over]