This will probably be a very long post.
I am currently a CA-2 (PGY-3) at an academic anesthesiology program in the Southwest. I recently had to meet my program director regarding a decision from the Clinical Competency Committee. For the last 6 months of my CA-1 year, I received an “unsatisfactory” for one of the ABA Essential Attributes (#4 – reacts to stressful situations in an appropriate manner). Their primary concerns are my self-confidence and my ability to react to stressful situations, particularly anesthetic-related complications. As far as I know, this isn’t a formal probation or remediation – instead, I received recommendations in a formal letter which I received a few weeks ago.
With these issues in mind, I have started to question my ability to become an anesthesiologist as well as my interest in anesthesiology altogether. There is literature stating that residents who receive an “unsatisfactory” rating in the ABA essential attributes are far less likely to graduate or become board certified. I have also questioned if my temperament is the right fit for anesthesiology, and have thought that I might be better off in a specialty with fewer high-stress, high-stakes situations, or even a specialty with less direct patient contact, such as radiology or pathology. I have also considered totally exiting medicine and entering a non-clinical career, but I am concerned that failing to complete a residency will raise red flags among employers.
One of the recommendations from the CCC was for me to go to a counselor, though I was only able to get one session because of the nature of my schedule. I have also seen a psychiatrist as I speculate some, if not most, of these issues may be due to undiagnosed ADHD.
I would appreciate any advice you have regarding how to move forward.
