Why Medicine - critique my response

sonpat

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Hi, I'm applying for the BS/MD program at Albany Medical School and I have an interview on January 18th. I'm working on my responses to specific questions: Right now it's "Why Medicine"

"I was diagnosed with Turner Syndrome at birth, so I've been surrounded by doctors, nurses and hospitals for a very long time. My pediatric endocrinologist, Dr. Lawrence Silverman, was a huge influence on me when I was little. When I was 5, I had to start taking growth hormone injections and I was terrified! But, he tool me aside and taught me exactly what the liquid in the needle was (somatropin!) and how it would help me grow (by stimulating the liver to release growth factors). And he did this with every treatment I got. Every time I went to see him, I'd fall in love with medicine a little more. I'd really like to be able to be the Dr. Silverman in someone else's life. And then, when I got older, I got more involved by volunteering in hospitals and shadowing doctors in India. I watched surguries, patient examinations, radiation treatments and I was fascinated by it all. The hospital I stayed at in India worked on a "sliding scale" basis, so alot of people who couldn't have gotten treatment were now able to afford medical care. And seeing the relief of their faces was incredible. I've always had a love for science , but in medicine I could combine my interest in biology and chemistry with my passion for helping others. Medicine is the perfect blend of humanitarianism and science. "

How is this response? too long? any other med school interview tips?

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I think there are some great things in your answer!

Do they have a word limit on your response? For medical school applications after college, the word limit is 5,300 characters for MD schools. I would look into if your program would like a similar length, or if a shorter response like yours is preferred.

If they want a shorter answer like you have, I would break up your response into two paragraphs. I would make the first paragraph about your experience as a patient and why that motivates you to be a doctor. In the second paragraph, I would talk about your experience in India and why that specifically motives you also. It seems like India was an inspirational trip for you, so I would dive into that a little deeper. Take sometime to hone in on "why" it was inspirational to you and hone in on that.

I would also recommend making a bullet point skeleton structure for your essay as a pre-writing exercise. It can help to organize your ideas in the way that will flow most to the reader.

You could also google "medical school personal statements" to find more resources to guide your ideas.

Keep working with it, and I'm sure you will be able to find something that conveys who you are well!
 
What is your point with the whole "sliding scale" comment. If you put it in there for a reason, expound on it. If not, then cut it and add more meaningful stuff elsewhere
 
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