Why pathology ownz you

[Stinger86]

I think a thread like this has been started before, but now I can finally add my own experiences, so no b!tching

1. No more faked empathy
2. Rarely/never required to be at the hospital before 7am
3. You can listen to music/radio while you work
4. On-Call lifestyle is much nicer than other fields
5. You can fart during an autopsy and no one will ever realize it
6. Laid-back, down to earth coworkers
7. Dictating 20 lines of information in less than 30 seconds while taking only 5 breaths.
8. Involves surgery without having to put the patient back together
9. Involves surgery without requiring you to hold your hands above the level of the table at all times ("OMG you're contaminated, RESCRUB!!!!")
10. Nearly everyone you work with loves what they do
11. Hours can be on the long side, but it's often low-stress work

Feel free to add your own. I seem to come up with 2 new ones every day.

---

Members don't see this ad.

 

[Clair de Lune]

12. You can go more than 15 minutes without getting "helpful" pages for something ridiculous (like "doctor, Mr. X's restraint orders are going to expire in 9 hours...just wanted to let you know!")
13. You get to wear scrubs & comfy shoes everyday My favorite outfit!

 

[b&ierstiefel]

14. No Intern Year!!!!!

 

[Clair de Lune]

15. Everything is less disgusting (gangrene toe, bloody placenta, etc.) after it has been soaked in formalin overnight!

 

[b&ierstiefel]

16. no INTERN YEAR!!!!!!!

 

[Stinger86]

17. You get to work with 12 inch razor blades with handles
18. No incessant BEEP BEEP BEEP noise coming from a monitor 5 ft next to you
19. No 100 degree rooms

 

[Brian Pavlovitz]

20. Even the surgeons have to come to you for the final diagnosis.
21. You can have your coffee (or non-alcoholic beverage of choice) while looking at slides.

 

[yaah]

22. None of the crap about worrying about INRs, rehab, creatinine level, urine output, nursing home placement, etc etc etc.
23. No dressing changes.

 

[Pingu]

24. You are sitting down most of the day (with the exception of grossing/autopsy) and thus can wear 4 inch heels.
25. No ROUNDING! amen.
26. Dead people can't goon you.

 

[yaah]

27. No writing orders.
28. No remembering pharmacology.

 

[Harbster]

29. Being asked, "What the **** is a pathologist?"

 

[Stinger86]

30. No auscultation or percussion
31. No breast, pelvic, rectal, or otherwise genital-related exams
32. No interpretations of EKGs, EEGs, etc.

 

[Clair de Lune]

33. No overnight in-house call! Ever! Good for people like me who love sleeping in their own bed at night.
34. Apparently path residents are more attractive than the general population (based on some of the recent threads in this forum)
35. Path is by far the most interesting and intellectually stimulating field of medicine -- and I am actually being serious about this one.

 

[gungho]

36. No one asking for their Valium, Xanax, Klonopin, Oxycontin, methadone, Lortab, Vicodin, Percocet, Percodan, Soma, Tylenol #3, Fiorinal refills early 'cause their kid flushed them down the sink/toilet or their purse got stolen or their low-life roommate stole them or "doc, they're just not working like they used to" etc. etc. etc.

 

[quant]

36. No one asking for their Valium, Xanax, Klonopin, Oxycontin, methadone, Lortab, Vicodin, Percocet, Percodan, Soma, Tylenol #3, Fiorinal refills early 'cause their kid flushed them down the sink/toilet or their purse got stolen or their low-life roommate stole them or "doc, they're just not working like they used to" etc. etc. etc.

37. It s just plain cool....

 

[Harbster]

38. People will never question your bloodshot eyes after you've blazed a fatty with your hot PA...they will foolishly assume that you've been working awfully hard staring into your microscope.

 

[Anasazi23]

I'm not even in path, and I have to say, path is looking reeealll good right about now. Especially coming off a 24 hour psychiatry call filled with maniacal drug addicts and otherwise obnoxious people.

The radio part sounds very, very nice.

They should have a pathology type fellowship for psych....we do "psychiatric autopsies" but they're not quite the same as yours.

Good for you guys...the fake empathy thing does get old.

Carry on.

 

[Harbster]

40. Excusing yourself whenever the **** you want to take a mean $hit.

 

[stormjen]

41. Not being trapped in an OR.
42. Getting to chop up people without getting arrested.
43. Getting to work one-on-one with sexy residents/attendings, in the intimate setting of a double-headed microscope.

 

[Harbster]

44. Making an a$$hole surgeon wait on you only to tell 'em his job is not done.

 

[A.D.O.R.]

43b. Getting to interact with lots of different people in the hospital. This way, you get to see most of the dateables in the hospital and you can make informed dating decisions.

45. Great resident parties and get togethers (at UCSF, anyway).

46. Free weekends.

47. Vacation months...I mean, elective months.

Sweet!

 

[deschutes]

46. Free weekends.

Tell me about it. I mean, TWO-day weekends. I feel almost normal again. I can actually sit at home one day per week doing absolutely nothing.

48. Wearing jeans and cheeky T-shirts on Friday.
49. No getting to the hospital at 5:30 - unless ya(ah) want to
50. No friggin' beeping IV machines

 

[cytoborg]

51. No discharge instructions, rectal exams, making the patient NPO or writing for benadryl.
52. Eating, sleeping, and urinating on a regular basis.
53. Swearing like a sailor without looking unprofessional in front of the patients.
54. Interesting co-workers who actually have lives outside medicine.

 

[deschutes]

53. Swearing like a sailor

Guilty!

 

[bananaface]

55. Time to post on SDN

 

[stormjen]

56. Getting to maintain an exercise schedule.

 

[geddy]

46. Free weekends.

Huh?

Tell me about it. I mean, TWO-day weekends. I feel almost normal again. I can actually sit at home one day per week doing absolutely nothing.

Same as part A.

 

[b&ierstiefel]

Huh?

You had Saturday off. Quit your bitchin'. (I'm just kidding man...wouldn't want you to go all Rosai on my sorry ass...).

Next weekend, your weekend is gonna be like my weekend.

Oh yeah, you got a few uteri waiting for you to cut in tomorrow. Fortunately for you, the Monday GYN OR schedule don't look too bad.

You say "Bring it!"
Vag path says, "Oh, it's already been brought'n!"

 

[Harbster]

57. Being ****ing weird and loving it!

 

[Stinger86]

58. Taking a vacation and not having to worry about how your patients are doing

 

[deschutes]

55. Time to post on SDN

This is great! Get online before 0830h and the connection is faster than a speeding bullet... as opposed to other times of the day.

 

[stormjen]

59. Walking through the sign-out room and hearing things like "vulva, biopsy", or asking other residents "hey, did you see that big breast?" or "woah, a penectomy!".

59b. Actually seeing those specimens.

 

[quant]

59. Walking through the sign-out room and hearing things like "vulva, biopsy", or asking other residents "hey, did you see that big breast?" or "woah, a penectomy!".

59b. Actually seeing those specimens.

 

[beary]

60. Not having to calculate maintenance fluids.

 

[Harbster]

61. Ample time to surf porn in between cases.

 

[Harbster]

62. Gladly pitching a tent without the worry that anyone will notice.

 

[Aubrey]

63. Attendings that are amused by "Simpsons" quotations.
64. 2 hour lunches on autopsy.

 

[SLUsagar]

65. signouts, while listening to daytime march madness bball games...
(which i'll make sure attendings do come MARCH 2006!)

 

[deschutes]

66. Returning a page - from your insurance agent

 

[Harbster]

67. Not worrying about landing a job once you've completed residency...opps, that's radiology

 

[MSc44]

38. People will never question your bloodshot eyes after you've blazed a fatty with your hot PA...they will foolishly assume that you've been working awfully hard staring into your microscope.

LOL

this forum makes me want to go into path

 

[quant]

67. Not worrying about landing a job once you've completed residency...opps, that's radiology

Not worrying about your job being exported overseas.....oops that s radiology again!...