Would you wait to apply for a friend or not?

[emttim]

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So here's the situation....I'm sure I'll get plenty of idiotic and/or ******ed answers because this is SDN, obviously, but I'm hoping for at least a couple serious responses so I can kinda get an idea of what you guys would do.

Basically, my best friend who I've known for 10+ years decided halfway through medic school that he wants to be a doctor. Downside? He's a year behind me in college because he started later than I did. So I have two options. Do three years at the UC I transfer to, and get a double major, so I can apply at the same time as him, or do two years and apply to med school a year early.

The advantages to waiting would be obviously if we get lucky enough to get into the same med school, I can room with him and cut down on rent by a significant amount, and I'd have a guaranteed study partner who doesn't screw around. I'd also be able to get my pre-med reqs done in enough time that I could take my MCAT and know my score before I apply. Disadvantages would obviously be taking one extra year and racking up that much more undergrad debt.

Advantages to not waiting would basically just be not taking an extra year and accruing more undergrad debt. Disadvantages would be (but not limited to) having to take the MCAT the same summer I apply so I'd have no idea what my MCAT score was, I'd have to room on my own since I've had too many bad experiences with roommates to trust anyone I don't know, etc.

Thoughts, opinions, etc.?

 

[mvenus929]

How much undergrad debt are we talking here? There's a world of difference between my 10K a year and someone who goes to a private university at 40K a year.

 

[Aynsl156]

you could always take that year to work somewhere near your friend's ugrad, room with him/her off campus, and take the time to polish up your application.

 

[Bacchus]

It really could go both ways. The cost of living by yourself for a year may be comparable to the costs of tuition and living expenses at your current university when undergrad financial aid is taken into consideration. If you could better your application over that year then I think it would be a plausible choice. That being said, it seems a bit strange to answer why an additional year with, "I was waiting for my friend."

Also, you could act like a mentor to him granted you are successful this upcoming application season. Having a friend that has gone through the process and is knowledgable would be a huge asset to anyone.

Personally, for my own reasons I could rationialize staying an extra year based on grades. However, I am not sure of your situation. It appears that you do not have a problem with your grades (congrats) and have decent extracurriculars. If you perform as well on the MCAT as you have performed in undergrad you will be a very competitive applicant in my eyes.

This is a friendship and you two may be bound to separate come residency or earlier. I have very close friends at school, but I know that sometime I will more than likely have to say goodbye. If this were a significant other I think the entire outlook I have may be flipped. However, this is for you, not your friend.

Plan out the financial logistics of living in any of the cities the schools are located in (You could probably do Philly for under 10k, I have this previous year) with consideration of your undergrad debt for one year (with financial aid). Whichever is cheaper (ie you saving money by not having to rent a single BR for your first year of med school) could help you make your decision.

I don't think the financials here are the best way to determine what to do. You need to sit down and have a talk with your friend. Its not the end of the world if you two don't apply together.

 

[1956Goldtop]

Maybe rather than racking up an additional year of debt, you could spend some time polishing up your application with some additional work as a medic or in the hospital as a technician, lab work, etc. You don't necessarily have to rack up debt in order to wait for your friend (which I think is a perfectly reasonable thing to do if you guys have been best friends for that long).

 

[154241]

i vote just graduating in the two years and then taking a year off so you and your friend are still on the same schedule. work, pay off loans, have fun; i am a huge fan of all years off. sdn wisdom says double majors don't matter to adcoms anyway. and i don't think it's stupid to want to apply with a friend; it would be awesome if one of my closest friends was going through this with me and we could wind up at school together.

 

[bodonid]

You are in Cali, so chances are even if you both go to state school you won't get in the same colleges. And if you do there is a good chance that one or both of you would have to "trade down" just so you can go to the same school. Right?

 

[Maxprime]

Cut the cord. Seriously. I'm not trying to suggest something unhelpful. Check out how random this process is - there is nowhere close to a guarantee you'll get into the same med school.

In all seriousness, if this is a romantic relationship then I can see the point. But if it's not, you're being absurd.

 

[emttim]

I've considered just taking a year off, but I don't like the fact that you only get the 6 month grace period once, and on EMT pay I'm not sure if I would be able to afford to start paying my loans back yet.

The difference would be probably 30K of undergrad versus 36 or 37K.

And yes, the point that being Cali residents means the likelihood of going to the same school is very little is certainly a good one.

 

[Aynsl156]

30K of loans for Ugrad is a lot. I have 20K, and my re-payment plan runs me about 200/month. Would you be able to not take the grace period and straight up pay them until med school and then ask for a deferral?

 

[emttim]

30K of loans for Ugrad is a lot. I have 20K, and my re-payment plan runs me about 200/month. Would you be able to not take the grace period and straight up pay them until med school and then ask for a deferral?

Well, students loans are deferred anytime you're in school part-time or more regardless anyway, but yeah I don't see why I couldn't "save" the grace period until later.

Honestly though guys, if I took a year off, I probably wouldn't do jack **** to improve my app...I'd probably just scuba dive a ****load and maybe get into tech diving. 😛

 

[Begaster]

This is absurd.

The odds of you getting into the same university is tiny. To waste a year of your life waiting for him to catch up on the odd, minuscule chance that you'll both end up in the same school is pointless.

 

[135892]

Honestly, not trying to be a jerk here, you should just go on your own path. I understand that it may be hard, but it really isn't worth it to change your plans just so you can matriculate with your friend. Schools are really hard to get into, and the likelihood that you both will get accepted into the same school is not very high. And even if you do get accepted into the same school, it may not be the school of you top choice. Now if you were planning to take a year off anyway, then you can see where both of you get accepted and decide if you both want to go to the same school.

 

[CptCrunch]

Cut the cord. Seriously. I'm not trying to suggest something unhelpful. Check out how random this process is - there is nowhere close to a guarantee you'll get into the same med school.

In all seriousness, if this is a romantic relationship then I can see the point. But if it's not, you're being absurd.

What this guy said.

 

[centersharpie]

Honestly I wouldn't, and your friend should understand why you don't want to wait. Of course you can use that year to gloss over ur app., but in all seriousness since your application is competitive, sans the MCAT score, then there is no reason why you should wait.It is not even gauranteed that you and your friend would get in to the same medical school.

I'm also in a situation similar to this, and my friend understands why I'm going to apply and not wait around a year for her either. This shouldn't break you guys apart, friendship wise. My friend even encouraged me to apply and whatever school I get into she's going to apply the following year.

So go on and apply. Maybe you will be able to give ur friend advice on the app. process and your first year of medical school.

 

[Doctor J]

Cut the cord. Seriously. I'm not trying to suggest something unhelpful. Check out how random this process is - there is nowhere close to a guarantee you'll get into the same med school.

In all seriousness, if this is a romantic relationship then I can see the point. But if it's not, you're being absurd.

👍 👍 👍

You'll make new friends and find new study partners. If you're at all serious about going to medical school you won't waste a year while your friend plays catch-up.

 

[emttim]

Good points. 😛 the other issue I had with applying in two years instead of three is I won't even be able to take my MCAT until the middle of June at the earliest since I won't finish ochem, physics and bio until then...so I'll have to apply without knowing my MCAT score or apply pretty damn late in like August; I don't really see either option being that appealing.

Hell for that matter, as far as the double major goes, I've just read three chapters so far of macroeconomics and this stuff is good to know but it's so dry I'm contemplating dumping this class before the drop without record deadline...I don't see myself being able to do an entire degree of this. At this point, it just seems like 3 units of unnecessary work since I don't need it for GE or my major.

 

[Aynsl156]

Well, hell, if you don't want a second major, then why bother sticking it out in undergrad? Save your money. Either apply in two years or work for a year if you can't stomach applying without knowledge of your MCAT scores.

 

[Blade28]

It's one thing to want to go to school with your friend. It's a whole 'nother issue if you're going to add on an extra major, spend an extra year in college, etc.

Not worth it, IMHO.

 

[154241]

30K of loans for Ugrad is a lot. I have 20K, and my re-payment plan runs me about 200/month. Would you be able to not take the grace period and straight up pay them until med school and then ask for a deferral?

hmm... i have 25k and am paying about 120/month. and i didn't start until january, so i'll only be paying until june or july or whatever. i consolidated what i could, and that helped...

as for people saying it's time to move on from your friend, i would agree if it were costing you anything to wait a year (which would be the case if you stayed in school for the double major). but i am a huge proponent of the year off as it has allowed me to not deal with interviewing stress while in school and keep reasonably on top of my almost $5k in application-related credit card debt (because i'm working at the same time). and like you said, you'll have the benefit of knowing your mcat scores before applying. having a low-key fun year is great too. there's a recent thread on here about pros/cons of the year off. working for the year as an emt would not definitely be looked down on by adcoms, and with maybe one regular volunteering ec or something, you could scuba dive all you want. so in my opinion, it's a win-win situation. hope that helps.

 

[EEL08]

Like everyone said, it would be very hard for you to both apply and get accepted to the same school. My husband and I both applied this year (only Osteopathic) and it's definitely not easy trying to get us both into the same school the same year. For a friend I wouldn't take that year off unless you were really wanting to anyway.

 

[mvenus929]

You can take the MCAT without completely finishing the classes. People did it all the time before the computerized MCAT came out. There's very little from orgo II that you need to know, and most of what you do need is at the beginning of the course. I couldn't tell you about bio and physics, as I don't know how they break it up in undergrad.

So, I'd suggest you take the MCAT in May, studying all semester for it, and then see what your application looks like come June. You can submit at the end of June/beginning of July and still be early.

 

[Snake Doctor]

Well are you sure you really want to double major??? To be honest, it doesn't matter AT ALL whether you have one major or two. The most important thing to consider is your GPA. If you can do so WITHOUT jeopardizing your GPA, by all means go for it. However, you also should realize that you can work on other areas of your app besides double majoring. Pick up a foreign language instead or conduct research. It appears that you haven't started at UCSB yet (?). I remember when I was a freshman, you hear people saying they'll triple major, double major, double major and minor, major and double minor.... etc. But once you are in and realize that it's simply not feasible, most people usually tone down, for many reasons (including extra curricular activities). Hey, I don't know about UCSB, but at UCLA we have a unit cap (and USC doesn't, go figure 🙄) and they take that VERY seriously. If you want to double major, make sure you go through proper channels because crossing the unit cap threshold = no degree and getting kicked out (yeah, it's the lamest policy every). The same goes with UC Berkeley. So I assume that UCSB has some sort of policy like this. Taking your time is a GREAT idea, esp. if you want to prep for the MCAT. Adding a second major is a whole different story amigo. Just hold off on that and think it clearly. Unless it's two areas where you can't pick between the two, then don't double major. Picking up a minor is much more feasible and convenient. Plus with all the amount of uncertainty, you can't wait for your best friend. It's not wise. It can be a factor, but not one where you base your decision off of. Good luck tho!

 

[suwaifo]

man you guys talk big, but would you actually do it?
cut off a friend that you know and knows you better than most other people?

come on now. Anything is possible. People here are telling you advice based on chance, but with hard work, anything is possible, if you really cared. That and do take financial considerations.

but don't just kill the guy

 

[Geekchick921]

I'm actually in a similar situation. My best friend (of 10 years and change) and I have a pact to go to med school together. Originally, I planned to apply in the 2009 cycle, but she wouldn't be ready until the next year. I am going to wait another year because, really, I realized I wouldn't be ready to apply for this next cycle anyway. I am going to not drive myself into the ground, work on my ECs, etc.

While it's true, the odds of you getting in together are slim, as someone else suggested, you can take this year to really polish up your application. I don't think I would transfer and say another year unless the double major REALLY interested me, but I would certainly consider taking a year off between college and medical school to work, volunteer, etc. You can still room with your friend. You can do a lot in that year off and will probably be happy you took it.

Anyone who's telling you to "cut the cord" because "you will make new friends in medical school"... well, I can't help but think they've either never had someone they could call their best friend, or just missed that line in your OP. I connect with my best friend and my fiance in a way that I do with no one else, and that is not something to forsake for getting into medical school 1 year earlier. I really don't think it's different from a similar situation with a romantic relationship. If my situation was flipped, I don't doubt for a second that my best friend would wait a year for me.

If your places were swapped, would he wait a year for you? Are you guys actually on the same page about where you want to apply/go (if you're accepted)? Have you talked about it yet?

 

[DeadCactus]

I wouldn't wait just for the friend.

It seems like the extra year would give you more time to put together a better application and some other fringe benefits. Depends how much you'll get out of the extra year. I wouldn't just kill time in courses I don't care about for a year though...

 

[Omni]

What I suggest you do is to apply to a couple of med schools and see what happens. This will give you an idea of what the application process is like, what to do, what not to do, etc. After you get your acceptances and rejections, you can take notes on what happened, what you did, what was different between your acceptances and rejections, etc.
At that point, you can decide whether your want to go through med school, or wait one year for your friend. If you wait one year, you'll have a better idea on the application process, and you can help your friend apply with you.

But again, if med schools keep a log on who applies and their outcomes, you may be questioned why you didn't accept the first time and why you're applying again. So in that case, you can call me a ******* and completely reject this thought or you can apply to schools far far away where you don't plan on going--just to see what application process is like.

 

[cbrons]

Cut the cord. Seriously. I'm not trying to suggest something unhelpful. Check out how random this process is - there is nowhere close to a guarantee you'll get into the same med school.

In all seriousness, if this is a romantic relationship then I can see the point. But if it's not, you're being absurd.

^

 

[decafplease]

I think you should graduate on time, take your MCAT late summer (so you have all summer to study) and apply the following year to wait for your buddy.

Everyone is saying they'd do it for a girl, but what's the line I hear guys use to describe these situations? Bros before h.... Nevermind 🙂

Seriously, though, it won't hurt to wait. You'll have a better shot at the MCAT if you study over the summer, and knowing your score before applying sounds nice. I don't see a major advantage to rushing ahead, especially if this guy is like a brother to you.

Sounds like you haven't transferred yet, is that right? If so, you may be putting the cart before the horse and it may actually take you more than two years to graduate. You might need an extra quarter or two. Just a thought...

 

[mvenus929]

What I suggest you do is to apply to a couple of med schools and see what happens. This will give you an idea of what the application process is like, what to do, what not to do, etc. After you get your acceptances and rejections, you can take notes on what happened, what you did, what was different between your acceptances and rejections, etc.
At that point, you can decide whether your want to go through med school, or wait one year for your friend. If you wait one year, you'll have a better idea on the application process, and you can help your friend apply with you.

But again, if med schools keep a log on who applies and their outcomes, you may be questioned why you didn't accept the first time and why you're applying again. So in that case, you can call me a ******* and completely reject this thought or you can apply to schools far far away where you don't plan on going--just to see what application process is like.

I wouldn't suggest that, just because the process is expensive. And it's really not something you want to go through twice. Once you label yourself as a reapplicant (and I believe they ask if you've applied to any medical schools before... if not on AMCAS, then certainly on a number of secondaries), it gets more difficult for you. This is like going in and taking the MCAT without studying 'just to see what it's like'. It'll be on your record, and it's not fun.

 

[decafplease]

What I suggest you do is to apply to a couple of med schools and see what happens. This will give you an idea of what the application process is like, what to do, what not to do, etc. After you get your acceptances and rejections, you can take notes on what happened, what you did, what was different between your acceptances and rejections, etc.
At that point, you can decide whether your want to go through med school, or wait one year for your friend. If you wait one year, you'll have a better idea on the application process, and you can help your friend apply with you.

But again, if med schools keep a log on who applies and their outcomes, you may be questioned why you didn't accept the first time and why you're applying again. So in that case, you can call me a ******* and completely reject this thought or you can apply to schools far far away where you don't plan on going--just to see what application process is like.

👍 to the bolded section, 👎 to the rest.

BAD idea. Waste of time, money and potential future acceptances... This is not a game. This is supposed to be a one shot deal. Don't mess around.

 

[Omni]

Thanks, I'll keep all that in mind.

 

[WantsThisBad]

So here's the situation....I'm sure I'll get plenty of idiotic and/or ******ed answers because this is SDN, obviously, but I'm hoping for at least a couple serious responses so I can kinda get an idea of what you guys would do.

Basically, my best friend who I've known for 10+ years decided halfway through medic school that he wants to be a doctor. Downside? He's a year behind me in college because he started later than I did. So I have two options. Do three years at the UC I transfer to, and get a double major, so I can apply at the same time as him, or do two years and apply to med school a year early.

The advantages to waiting would be obviously if we get lucky enough to get into the same med school, I can room with him and cut down on rent by a significant amount, and I'd have a guaranteed study partner who doesn't screw around. I'd also be able to get my pre-med reqs done in enough time that I could take my MCAT and know my score before I apply. Disadvantages would obviously be taking one extra year and racking up that much more undergrad debt.

Advantages to not waiting would basically just be not taking an extra year and accruing more undergrad debt. Disadvantages would be (but not limited to) having to take the MCAT the same summer I apply so I'd have no idea what my MCAT score was, I'd have to room on my own since I've had too many bad experiences with roommates to trust anyone I don't know, etc.

Thoughts, opinions, etc.?

All else aside just consider the fact that it's unlikely that you will both get into a med school that you both want to attend at the same time. If you could guarantee this then it would be great but I think all the positive things you mentioned (minus the MCAT part) bank on something that is unlikely in the end. You should go the route that makes the most sense for YOU. You're friend will catch up assuming he's serious and maybe he can get into the school you're at and you can still live together and study together.

 

[searun]

For the OP's sake, I hope the original post is a joke. If not, then avail yourself of the university's counseling services immediately.

 

[0Complications]

I can see your dilemma, but you should really think about what you want. Do you want to go straight into medical school or do you want to take that year and enjoy yourself, maybe travel or scuba dive like you said? I think that working on your application is great, but if you need a year just because you need a year, I would advise you to take it.

Now I don't necessarily think that taking your MCAT in June or even July for that matter is horrible. It's not as early as it could be, but I have a buddy who took his MCAT last July and he is doing alright interview wise. If this is your big holdup then I think you will still be ok.

Basically, you should ask yourself if it really is your friend or if it is more you that wants to wait and your friend is a perfectly plausible scapegoat.

Either way, make a decision that you believe you will be happy with.

 

[Bananas Foster]

In all seriousness, if this is a romantic relationship then I can see the point. But if it's not, you're being absurd.

Haha, Right, but for me it'd probably be more likely to follow my best friend to a school than follow a romantic relationship. Hell, at least my friends will play video games with me.🙂

 

[metalgearHMN]

These naysayers just don't understand🙄
[youtube]lL4L4Uv5rf0[/youtube]

 

[jkl123]

q

 

[135892]

For the OP's sake, I hope the original post is a joke. If not, then avail yourself of the university's counseling services immediately.

co-sign

 

[MsJLewis]

is anyone else extremely confused by the first sentence? this post makes no sense at all. he decided halfway through medical school that he wanted to be a doctor? jeez i would hope so, since he is in medical school..... and it's a downside? i seriously am so confused right now. and way to start out a post by insulting SDN. That ought to draw some great replies.

It said MEDIC school not MEDICAL school.

OP: If you want you should take a year off to rest, relax, play video games or improve your application. I'm in my year off and love it.

If not, then go straight to med school and act as a mentor/guide for your friend when he is going through the process.

The decision should be dependent on your needs alone. Don't use your friend as a crutch. Plus most schools have single dorms which eliminates the roommate issue.

 

[emttim]

is anyone else extremely confused by the first sentence? this post makes no sense at all. he decided halfway through medical school that he wanted to be a doctor? jeez i would hope so, since he is in medical school..... and it's a downside? i seriously am so confused right now. and way to start out a post by insulting SDN. That ought to draw some great replies.

Do some research before making stupid statements then...I wouldn't exactly call your reply "great", speaking of them. And honestly, you have 12 posts and just registered in the last two months, so you don't really know crap about SDN. After being here awhile, you'll realize the validity of my comment on how there will be inevitably be at least 1 idiotic response to every thread. For instance, your assumption that medic and medical school are the same would qualify as one, imo.

 

[Asp]

I say you take that year off to be on schedule with your friend. It seems like you need a maturity boost anyway .

 

[inaminute]

tim, whaddaya gonna do if your friend "betrays" you by deciding not to apply, to take a year before applying, to apply somewhere that you wouldn't/couldn't go? in other words, does your buddy know what position he occupies in your world? seriously? what if he gets a significant other in the next year and decides to make him/her the center of his universe?

I'd never delay just for the hope of being accompanied by a buddy to make my life more comfy. That's my 2 centavos.

 

[leopanther]

Here are a few reasons you should apply without waiting for your friend:

He may not do well on the MCAT and will need one more year to improve his score.

As above poster said, you don't know whether he'll be as loyal to you. He may change his mind about medicine, school he wants, develop a relationship.

I don't know if you've lived with him before but sometimes rooming with a friend can actually make you hate each other.

Friendships, as you go further into your 20s, aren't the same as they are throughout high school, college. Priorities shift, you grow apart, new people come into your life.

If only one of you gets into a top choice school, it can be a reason for resentment.

 

[emttim]

I say you take that year off to be on schedule with your friend. It seems like you need a maturity boost anyway .

So is it my understanding that you wanted to offer what an example of immaturity is with your reply in order to help me get that boost? I would hope so, otherwise it would appear that you're both immature and incompetent, instead of just immature; that would just be tragic.

Anyhow, inaminute, leopanther, you guys do make good points. I'm probably going to take a year off anyway after I graduate, but it's going to be so I can know my MCAT score going in, have plenty of time to take it, and so I can enjoy myself a little.

Judging by some (thankfully the minority) of the posts I've read on this thread, maybe in that year I'll be able to come to terms with the fact some of my colleagues are going to be the most retched, backstabbing sons of bitches imaginable.

 

[leopanther]

Judging by some (thankfully the minority) of the posts I've read on this thread, maybe in that year I'll be able to come to terms with the fact some of my colleagues are going to be the most retched, backstabbing sons of bitches imaginable.

As a second year med student, I can tell you that you are right on.
But your loyalty to your friend tells me that you won't be one of them.

 

[suwaifo]

tim, whaddaya gonna do if your friend "betrays" you by deciding not to apply, to take a year before applying, to apply somewhere that you wouldn't/couldn't go? in other words, does your buddy know what position he occupies in your world? seriously? what if he gets a significant other in the next year and decides to make him/her the center of his universe?

I'd never delay just for the hope of being accompanied by a buddy to make my life more comfy. That's my 2 centavos.

What kind of friend would betray a man?

 

[F12]

OP: Statistically, you and your friend would be lucky to both get into medical school, let alone get accepted at the same university.

Apply without him.

 

[Pinkertinkle]

Do it if its your man lover.

 

[45408]

Maybe rather than racking up an additional year of debt, you could spend some time polishing up your application with some additional work as a medic or in the hospital as a technician, lab work, etc. You don't necessarily have to rack up debt in order to wait for your friend (which I think is a perfectly reasonable thing to do if you guys have been best friends for that long).

This is what I was going to post. Make sure that your application is well-rounded and rock solid, and maybe work during that time, so you don't acquire more debt. Then when you and your friend apply, you don't have to say that you were just waiting around for a year for your friend, but that you were doing some things that you had always wanted to do. Ixnay on the double majoray.