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lmaoooo this is by far the best post I've read on this forum, and it's a forum for doctors and aspiring doctors!! haha brilliant.
Really? That's not even HIS best post he's ever put up.
lmaoooo this is by far the best post I've read on this forum, and it's a forum for doctors and aspiring doctors!! haha brilliant.
Really? That's not even HIS best post he's ever put up.
Hittin' up the TBL/NSH game tonight. Next time I go to a game (I can sometimes get seats 2-3 rows back from the glass), I wanna hold up a "SDN" sign for all my homies on here.
Question for the forum: "Is Shawn Thornton the biggest dickhead ever for appealing his suspension, or is he just testing the new disciplinary process?"
I think he is testing the process, but, at the same time, is the biggest dickhead ever for doing so. I mean, he punched Orpik while his head was on the ice! Twice!
Sooo I watched my first hockey game in over a decade last night :Rangers v Penguins.. Exciting stuff and glad to see the Penguins win. But I realized that I have no real idea what's going on. Since football will come to an end soon, I need another winterr sport. Forget bball. ...Anyway anyone knoww of a goof primer on hockey?
Thanks man. I'm just going to dive head first into it.I think I could explain hockey to a noob a LOT easier than I could football. Hockey combines ideas from basketball and soccer, but also has it's own. I mean, object is puck into opposite net, and keep it out of your own. Teams weighted towards the attack. Dedicated goalkeeper. Various penalties to keep order; no tripping, using the stick to injure or impede, no fighting, not actively attempting to injure another player. That's about it. One almost unique factor is that fighting, although penalized, is allowed, and only in lacrosse is it an accepted part of the game. Still, outside of men's professional leagues in North America, you won't find fighting (or not much). It is expressly forbidden in NCAA, women's, and Olympic hockey. However, the KHL in Russia loosened up fighting rules in 2011; in 2010, there was a game with 840 penalty minutes, with 421 minutes for one team, and 419 for the other. The NHL record for penalty minutes in one game is 419 - for both teams.
I don't know of another primer. I think just watching will give you a lot of what you need, and, when other things come up, like "offsides", if you don't get it, the internet has voluminous resources.
Thanks man. I'm just going to dive head first into it.
lmao... epic as usual my friend. I've come to expect nothing less.
Pretty epic post. Thanks for the laughs.Nuances of hockey, for teh noobs:
- 5 skaters and 1 goalie per team. Throwing the puck down the ice away from your own net (when you are defending your own goal) is called "icing". Play stops, and a face-off is held BACK on your end of the ice. This is designed to make the defending players not become giant wuss-es.
- When a penalty is called, that player sits in the penalty box for (usually 2, sometimes 4, sometimes 5) minutes. This places your team "one-man down" for the duration on the ice, creating an offensive advantage for the opposing team. The team that is penalized (that is... the team that is trying to "kill the penalty")... has "icing" waived; they are now permitted to just wing the puck out of their own end of the ice. The penalized player feels shame whilst sitting in the box, but never thereafter.
- Don't touch the goalie, especially in the "crease" (the blue-painted area in front of the net). The goalie cannot be interfered with, and must be permitted to make a play on the puck at all times. Violating this rule will result in a two-minute penalty, and will invoke the anger of the other teams "enforcer(s)", who are lesser-skilled and more-muscled players whose (primary?) role is to beat the living hell out of anyone who violates this and other unwritten rules of the game. Consequently, hockey is a relatively well-self-policed game.
- The player carrying the puck MUST cross the blue line (into the offensive zone) first. Other players cannot be across the blue line (and in the offensive zone) ahead of the puck. That is called "offsides". Its similar to soccer, except that men never kiss or touch each others genitals, as is common in soccer.
- When a player is injured, play only sometimes stops, as the injured player most often can get up and play and skate to the bench and be replaced. All substitutions are held in "real-time", with play not stopping. Only rarely and when the suspicion for serious injury is high are players stretchered off of the ice. This is highly unlike soccer, in which when a player has a 'cramp', they are stretchered off of the 'pitch' (field), only to get up, touch another man's genitals, receive a kiss (usually from that same man), and get back on the field without incident or further ado. This is common practice in soccer. Hockey players have been known to finish games and score goals with broken appendicular bones.
- Hockey games are comprised of three [20-minute] periods of play. The ice is cleaned between each period, so hockey games (including stoppage time) usually last less than two hours in total. This is different than American Football, in which games pretty much last the entirety of one day, with only 12-15 minutes of actual "playing" time, as play is whistled "dead" every three seconds, and then each play is reviewed by a panel of old vasculopaths on a telemetry unit and then discussed at length for at least ten hours every day for the next week on ESPN.
- Fighting (that is, fisticuffs) is permitted in hockey. Generally, two men agree to settle a disagreement, remove gloves and other encumbrances, and proceed to duel one-on-one until one player, the other, or both do tire from the event, or until one is rendered unable to continue. After the on-ice disagreement is finished, no further action is required. There is often a show of solidarity between the two combatants to indicate that the matter is settled. This is very different from American Football or Basketball, in which disagreements generally result in the shooting death(s) of one or several individuals in what is known as "the club", and frequently involve non-combatants (limo-drivers, wives-and-girlfriends, family members, entourages, etc). A "rap album" is then generally "cut", detailing the events of the conflict resolution, often to the economic benefit of the original combatants.
- Hockey players are generally very literate and are often well-spoken and gentlemanly. This is unlike many other-sport athletes who frequently end every sentence with "know-wha'mm'sayy'n'".
- Hockey players are rarely found to be in serious violation of the law. The most common notable offenses of hockey players are crimes related to gambling or analgesic abuse. Baseball, football, and basketball players (on the other hand) are most frequently found to be charged with sexual assault, rape, murder, robbery, conspiracy to commit murder, dog-fighting, animal cruelty, weapons possession, narcotic and other drug-related charges, performance-enhancing-drug abuse, or other violent crimes. Hockey players generally aren't involved in such matters, as "their Dad(s) would kick their ass(es) if they did that, and its just not right anyways, eh?".
- I could go on like this all night. - and to those other sports fans who are going to criticize me... know this: I'm also a devoted baseball fan who will occasionally watch some futbol (soccer) when its on. I can't wait for World Cup next year. If you want to debate the (de)merits of the NFL/NBA with me.... I'm open, g'head.
These are two vids of the 'butt goal'. Look at it now, because that is as flukey a goal as you will EVER see!
lol wow that's crazy. in my mind I'd except the refs to blow the puck dead if they can't see it, but I guess I also understand that this was a confusing call to make. strange way to lose a game haha
@RustedFox St. Louis with 4 goals by the first 20% of the second period! His 2,3,4 goals qualify for a "natural" hat trick!
It would be INSANE if he scored 7 goals in this game. That guy STILL has it!
don't know how to feel yet. the heart and soul of our squad is gone, but with what he was demanding I truly can't blame the Rangers front office. hopefully we can get some goal production from St. Louis to ease the pain a bit, but imagining Callahan being a 35 year old making $6.5 million with a no trade clause 6 years from now would have just been detrimental to the future of our organization. I guess it had to be done, but Captain Cally will be missed.
also Vanek from the Isles traded for a second rounder and a prospect? lol, that front office is a joke man.
Ya sure, you betcha! Minnesota Wild! ...and Chi Blackhawks from our MN hockey hiatus after the North Stars were stolen away from us (I'll see you in hell Norm Green! - his own words: "Only an idiot could lose money on hockey in Minnesota")
Great start so far: Wild 1st in NW division, Chi 1st in Western Conference! If only we were at the real mid-season...lockout has been brutal!
I can't get enough puck, I actually drive a Zamboni after exam blocks at a local rink. Any pond hockey enthusiasts out there?!
So excited to have Parise and Suter!
So, I get out of work (night and night) and am driving home Sunday morning. I am zoning and get stopped for 69 in a 55. I tell the local officer that I would normally take a nap before driving home, but I was going to the hockey game that afternoon. He doesn't write me a ticket, and says, "having to see the Sabres is punishment enough", and lets me go.
Sabres lost 4-3 in the shootout to end the season, after being up 2-0.
And my Panthers end up snagging the top pick...
Some guys were talking about that on the radio this morning. However, that belies the whole core of pro sports contracts - that you cannot "bag it", per the contract, that you have to give your best. That's why, for example, Dominik Hasek, 20 years ago now, claimed he tweaked his knee, when he didn't want to play. For a pro player to just phone it in, on purpose, is black-letter contract breach. And, to add insult to injury, it's the "lottery" aspect to the NHL draft, like the NBA draft. Finishing last doesn't even guarantee getting the first choice! Bummer!Sabres are in full "dishonor for Connor" mode.
Penguins coaching staff's job is to injure every forward that we have.