* * 2009-2010 Personal Statement Thread * *

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Given that you are over by 4000 characters, I think that it may be a bit choppy if you were to just take out almost half of your essay (and still mention all the points you were trying to make originally). How many different ideas do you go into? Understand that in 4500 characters you probably won't be able to say everything you want to talk about.

For example, in mine i spent the 1st third talking about an activity that i am passionate about and how it made me interested in medicine. the 2nd third of it detailing a positive experience in a clinical setting that confirmed my interest; and finally a conclusion that related the two and how they are similar.

I really only touched upon 2 main ideas (a clinical experience and an EC), but I went into detail so that the reader could understand why i want to do medicine. Of course, I have many other experiences that I could've written about that influenced my decision for medicine, but there just isn't the space in the PS. But that's what the secondaries are for, so you can add more details about you as an applicant to their school. (And they will also see everything else you did in the primary)

I know everyone's PS is different, so i'm not saying the way i did it is perfect because its not, but if your PS goes into too many examples you may want to consider trying to rewrite it and limiting yourself to say 3 ideas or so. Because if you had 6 main pts and you edited out all the details (to fit it in 4500 characters) it may come off to the reader as not having any depth or whatnot. Just my 2 cents. I hope this helps somewhat.

I discuss three main experiences linking them to an EC that i have been passionate about forever. I guess i go into too much detail with each experience??? I dont know..i read that barron's "get into school with these essays" or something like that, and it kept saying "show us, not tell us." So i have been describing everything to make it very visual...but i probably went to far. Now i dont even like how it sounds and think its very generic!
 
In my PS, I talk about instances where certain physicians have: entrusted me with certain tasks, explained test results, pharmacology, pathophys etc. My question is, should I use their full names or abbreviate. For example,

Dr. Y did xyz.

or

Dr. Young did xyz.

Any help would be appreciated!
 
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Hi everyone,


i am applying to DO schools this year. I wrote my PS last year when I completed my committee letter for my undergrad school.

My question is this: Last year when writing my PS, I mentioned my twin brother's battle with Kawasaki's disease when we were five. He was is a coma for about 3 weeks and these were some of my early experiences with medicine. I have done tons of volunteer work and research to solidify my interests since then.

I lost my brother about 2 months ago to drug addiction. We fought as a family to get him into rehab, he went. He probably needed a longer program. He had several hospitalizations this year for Psych issues as well as heart problems (from cocaine).


It is obviously a tremendous loss as he was my twin. I want to mention his death in my statement PRIMARILY because it has taught me so much. I have been in the same shoes many of the patients I saw at the teaching hospital I volunteered. I had to learn how to intervene to the best of my abilities, but still go home and live my own life--and try to do so joyfully. I want to say that my life is not just a culmination of these difficult things, that they will help me relate well to my patients and form appropriate boundaries.

I need some feedback about how to talk about this. What do you all think? How would you talk about it if you were in my shoes. From the practical side, I finished my lab courses from Spring Semester, but took an incomplete grade in Physiology.
 
In my PS, I talk about instances where certain physicians have: entrusted me with certain tasks, explained test results, pharmacology, pathophys etc. My question is, should I use their full names or abbreviate. For example,

Dr. Y did xyz.

or

Dr. Young did xyz.

Any help would be appreciated!

I would put Dr. Y just to respect the doctor's privacy(that's what i did in mine newayz). But also, as someone put it to me, you never know who is reading your PS (It could be someone who doesn't like/has beef with that doctor you mentioned). Better to be safe than sorry.:)
 
I discuss three main experiences linking them to an EC that i have been passionate about forever. I guess i go into too much detail with each experience??? I dont know..i read that barron's "get into school with these essays" or something like that, and it kept saying "show us, not tell us." So i have been describing everything to make it very visual...but i probably went to far. Now i dont even like how it sounds and think its very generic!

Yeah you definitely went into too much detail. You'll def have to cut one of those experiences out. In mine I essentially detailed one experience and how it related back to a passionate EC and I was under the character count by about 400.

Try to work with it and see if you can keep the 2 experiences. Remember that it needs to be concise and to the point, so see if there are any sentences that aren't needed for the reader to understand what is going on. But you def have to cut a lot to get to 4500 characters from 8500.
 
Hi everyone,


i am applying to DO schools this year. I wrote my PS last year when I completed my committee letter for my undergrad school.

My question is this: Last year when writing my PS, I mentioned my twin brother's battle with Kawasaki's disease when we were five. He was is a coma for about 3 weeks and these were some of my early experiences with medicine. I have done tons of volunteer work and research to solidify my interests since then.

I lost my brother about 2 months ago to drug addiction. We fought as a family to get him into rehab, he went. He probably needed a longer program. He had several hospitalizations this year for Psych issues as well as heart problems (from cocaine).


It is obviously a tremendous loss as he was my twin. I want to mention his death in my statement PRIMARILY because it has taught me so much. I have been in the same shoes many of the patients I saw at the teaching hospital I volunteered. I had to learn how to intervene to the best of my abilities, but still go home and live my own life--and try to do so joyfully. I want to say that my life is not just a culmination of these difficult things, that they will help me relate well to my patients and form appropriate boundaries.

I need some feedback about how to talk about this. What do you all think? How would you talk about it if you were in my shoes. From the practical side, I finished my lab courses from Spring Semester, but took an incomplete grade in Physiology.
 
Hi everyone,


i am applying to DO schools this year. I wrote my PS last year when I completed my committee letter for my undergrad school.

My question is this: Last year when writing my PS, I mentioned my twin brother's battle with Kawasaki's disease when we were five. He was is a coma for about 3 weeks and these were some of my early experiences with medicine. I have done tons of volunteer work and research to solidify my interests since then.

I lost my brother about 2 months ago to drug addiction. We fought as a family to get him into rehab, he went. He probably needed a longer program. He had several hospitalizations this year for Psych issues as well as heart problems (from cocaine).


It is obviously a tremendous loss as he was my twin. I want to mention his death in my statement PRIMARILY because it has taught me so much. I have been in the same shoes many of the patients I saw at the teaching hospital I volunteered. I had to learn how to intervene to the best of my abilities, but still go home and live my own life--and try to do so joyfully. I want to say that my life is not just a culmination of these difficult things, that they will help me relate well to my patients and form appropriate boundaries.

I need some feedback about how to talk about this. What do you all think? How would you talk about it if you were in my shoes. From the practical side, I finished my lab courses from Spring Semester, but took an incomplete grade in Physiology.

Hi Emerald, I first wanted to extend my sincere condolences...I just couldn't imagine how I would feel if I lost my sister.

As for your PS, if one of the reason for the "why medicine" has to do with your brother, mention it. As a sibling, he is part of you...and as a twin, I would think that would apply even more.

I've been working on my PS mentioning my mom's recent diagnosis of cancer...I was told by one reader (on SDN) that I shouldn't, but the truth is...it is my personal statement and it totally answers the question why I want to pursue medicine. I have, however, had others read it and have gotten a strong, positive response...so other than proofing and maybe adding a little more, I'm pretty set for next year when I apply.

I think one of the goals of the PS, besides answering why you want to become a doctor is to also give your application a face. So many applications go through, and you want to stick out (for the right reasons of course).

Best of luck in your application!
 
Is it okay if I do not put two spaces in between new sentences and only use one?? I am trying to save every character possible!!
 
In my personal statement I specifically mention an interest in pathology, and it's a theme in my essay stemming from early experiences seeing diseases. I also do a lot of research studying the pathology of a particular disease process which is a main chunk of my personal statement. However, I do not actually plan on becoming a pathologist and also from looking through these SDN forums I've come to be aware that there arn't any DO pathology residencies.... does anyone think mentioning a love of pathology in a DO personal statement is then a bad idea? I don't know if I should've asked this question here considering all of you are premeds, but if some DO med student reads this, maybe you can give me your opinion. Thanks!
 
Alright, I am a reapplicant...woohooo!!! I was wondering how to change a personal statement that took me 3 years to perfect. It has everything about me in it but I know I cannot recycle it. Any ideas on a good way to do it?
 
Okay so...i re-wrote my personal statement and got it down to 4497 characters, from 8500 characters. Can someone please read/edit it for me? I feel like i have read this thing and rewritten it so many times that it doesnt make sense to me anymore and is beginning to sound boring. I would def appreciate a fresh perspective on it! Thanks so much everyone!
 
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Okay so...i re-wrote my personal statement and got it down to 4497 characters, from 8500 characters. Can someone please read/edit it for me? I feel like i have read this thing and rewritten it so many times that it doesnt make sense to me anymore and is beginning to sound boring. I would def appreciate a fresh perspective on it! Thanks so much everyone!

I've never done this on SDN, but I'd be happy to help critique your PS. You can pm me? I'm not sure how this works. Oh and my credentials? I got into medical school this year, so I guess my ps was good enough and I consider myself a pretty good writer. :D
 
In my personal statement I specifically mention an interest in pathology, and it's a theme in my essay stemming from early experiences seeing diseases. I also do a lot of research studying the pathology of a particular disease process which is a main chunk of my personal statement. However, I do not actually plan on becoming a pathologist and also from looking through these SDN forums I've come to be aware that there arn't any DO pathology residencies.... does anyone think mentioning a love of pathology in a DO personal statement is then a bad idea? I don't know if I should've asked this question here considering all of you are premeds, but if some DO med student reads this, maybe you can give me your opinion. Thanks!

You can definitely mention your passion for pathology since its what got you interested in medicine in the first place I assume. However, somewhere in the essay, throw in something along the lines of being open minded to other medical fields? Now with DO personal statements, its wise to talk specifically about about osteopathic medicine. Talk about the osteopathic principles that drew you to this field. Even better if you can connect pathology to osteopathic medicine somehow. (oh and I'm no longer pre-med, just sitting around waiting for school to start). :D
 
Alright, I am a reapplicant...woohooo!!! I was wondering how to change a personal statement that took me 3 years to perfect. It has everything about me in it but I know I cannot recycle it. Any ideas on a good way to do it?

If I were you, I'd try to rewrite the entire thing anew. If your ps from the first attempt wasn't good enough to get interviews/acceptances, it surely won't help the next time around. But that doesn't mean you can't reuse the same ideas if they are important to you. I wouldn't know how to help more without reading your ps myself. I would just try to work it at a different approach. Oh and it really took you three years to write your ps? wow. Also, are you considering retaking the MCAT? 22 is a bit below the average for DOs.
 
If I were you, I'd try to rewrite the entire thing anew. If your ps from the first attempt wasn't good enough to get interviews/acceptances, it surely won't help the next time around. But that doesn't mean you can't reuse the same ideas if they are important to you. I wouldn't know how to help more without reading your ps myself. I would just try to work it at a different approach. Oh and it really took you three years to write your ps? wow. Also, are you considering retaking the MCAT? 22 is a bit below the average for DOs.

Actually, my old PS is very strong. I had about 30 people read it and critique. My advisor told me it was the best he ever read, and he is a pretty serious guy. I started writing it as a sophomore and I truly believe that it helped me get my interviews to LECOM and PCOM, the only two I applied to...dumb I know. I am planning to retake the MCAT this September, but I figure with my GPA (cGPA3.6, sGPA 3.5) I should be considered before having my better (hopefully) MCAT.
 
im on approx my 450th PS draft. still cant nail it down.

no meaningful post from me here, just venting!
 
im on approx my 450th PS draft. still cant nail it down.

no meaningful post from me here, just venting!

I am feeling your pain! I hate feeling so pressured to finish it so I can submit my primary. GRRRR :mad: And as soon as I finish it I have to start really stressing over the MCAT, wonderful! Okay, I just needed to b!tch a little.

Good luck Grey Wind, I think we are applying to a lot of the same schools.
 
Actually, my old PS is very strong. I had about 30 people read it and critique. My advisor told me it was the best he ever read, and he is a pretty serious guy. I started writing it as a sophomore and I truly believe that it helped me get my interviews to LECOM and PCOM, the only two I applied to...dumb I know. I am planning to retake the MCAT this September, but I figure with my GPA (cGPA3.6, sGPA 3.5) I should be considered before having my better (hopefully) MCAT.

oh I didn't know you only applied to two schools. In that case, since the other schools haven't read it yet, then it should be good. I was concerned that you had a bunch of schools that didn't give you further consideration and they now have your old personal statement on file, therefore recycling an old personal statement wouldn't have been a great idea.

Good luck with it.
 
Is it any different than an MD school? I would primarily be applying to both MD and DO but I would prefer to send the same PS to both schools.

Basically what I am doing in my PS is:

1st paragraph: Opening with a dramatic (healthcare related) personal experience, and mentioning that this is what made me interested in medicine.

2nd: Further explaining what influences my character, (relationships with certain people).

3rd: What I have done to explore my interest in healthcare on my own doing (this is where my EC's come in, but I don't know if I should even mention my EC's in my PS!?)

4th: Tie up the essay back to the personal experience

What do you think?
 
I know this has been covered before but I couldn't find any specific threads on it this morning and I'm about to walk out the door.

So, when I cut and pasted my PS into AACOMAS, all my formatting is gone. Will that show up later when schools are reading my PS? I'm thinking its a non-permanent thing that just happens when you review your app before submitting. Anyone know for sure?

Thanks.
 
Should we mention what EC's we have done in explaining why we want to be a doctor? Or is that too redundant since the EC's are already in our application?
 
I know this has been covered before but I couldn't find any specific threads on it this morning and I'm about to walk out the door.

So, when I cut and pasted my PS into AACOMAS, all my formatting is gone. Will that show up later when schools are reading my PS? I'm thinking its a non-permanent thing that just happens when you review your app before submitting. Anyone know for sure?

Thanks.

From what the site says, It will appear exactly how it looks, The same thing happened to me so I just went through and indented my paragraphs.
 
Is it frowned upon to write the PS in a way that addresses the "inadequacies" in healthcare and how you would correct them?
 
Is it frowned upon to write the PS in a way that addresses the "inadequacies" in healthcare and how you would correct them?

There are some secondaries that may ask you that same question, so I would save it. There are a lot of sensitive subjects in the medical field and the last thing you want to do is upset the person reading your PS in any way. I would try to stay away from anything too opinionated.
 
I talk about Haiti. I talk about the inequality that is present there. And i clearly indicate that if I were a physician, I would help these people.

Do adcoms dislike it if I place this priority on treating others before treating Americans? After all, I'm being trained in America to treat Americans.

What do yall think?
 
If it relates to the theme of your statement, then why not? IMHO, I don't think it would be great to go on and on about wanting to practice there, while neglecting the states here, as there are our own problems and underserved populations, and you mention this yourself - we're being trained in America to be physicians in America. However, if you originally came from there, or you've visited there or done community service there, and the impoverished conditions have impacted you to become a physician to serve disenfranchised populations here in America, and that your experience has motivated you to use your medical education to return and give back to Haiti in a foreign aid mission, I think it'd be a positive thing to write about. I don't believe schools are looking for Mother Teresa's though, they are looking to train physicians to serve the public. With that in mind though, there is a need for international medicine and there are schools dedicated to that mission. Just don't fabricate or exaggerate in your statement, be truthful and express your motivations and desires.
 
The first sentence of my PS talked about how the american healthcare system sucks. I went to talk about something similar to what you intend to talk about. It's nothing a vast majority of ADCOMs would find objectionable as long as you word it properly.
 
In my PS I presume that the reader has read and is familiar with the descriptions of a few things in my Work/Activities section. Is that OK, or do I have to explain things again?

Specifically, I contrast my experiences working in engineering with interacting with patients as a tech in the psych ward, but without ever explicitly saying, "I used to be a printed circuit board designer and now I work as a behavioral health technician in inpatient psychiatry." I feel like I'm being repetitious if I restate it... plus it completely ruins my intro ;)
 
In my PS I presume that the reader has read and is familiar with the descriptions of a few things in my Work/Activities section. Is that OK, or do I have to explain things again?

Specifically, I contrast my experiences working in engineering with interacting with patients as a tech in the psych ward, but without ever explicitly saying, "I used to be a printed circuit board designer and now I work as a behavioral health technician in inpatient psychiatry." I feel like I'm being repetitious if I restate it... plus it completely ruins my intro ;)

Don't include something if it'll mess with the flow of your statement; something like that isn't very relevant.
 
So quick question on the DO personal statement. I just finished writing mine for the 2011 cylce and most of it is answering "why I want to become a physician"
I dont really answer the Osteopathic question since I believe most schools ask that question in the secondary. Does that seem OK?
 
Yeah that's fine, a lot of people will use pretty much the same essay for both AACOMAS and AMCAS.
 
Yeah that's fine, a lot of people will use pretty much the same essay for both AACOMAS and AMCAS.

Thats what I'm doing, although my AMCAS one is a little longer since more characters are allowed.

Thanks guys:thumbup:
 
I applied to MD and DO schools and just one wrote one personal statement that I sent to all schools. I think you're right in planning to go into more detail in secondaries...good luck!
 
So quick question on the DO personal statement. I just finished writing mine for the 2011 cylce and most of it is answering "why I want to become a physician"
I dont really answer the Osteopathic question since I believe most schools ask that question in the secondary. Does that seem OK?

Some may disagree with this, but I never put a whole lot of emphasis on why DO as opposed to MD. I read "Why do you want to be an Osteopathic Physician?" as "Why do you want to be a physician?" I make a point to write Osteopathic in front of physician every time I use the word.

If you're like me, you want to be a DO for nearly all the same reasons you want to be an MD. And Allo Schools don't actively ask why Allo.

It's like if you were married and your significant other wanted to know why you wanted to buy the red truck. You're not going to explain why it matters that the truck is red. You talk about why you want A truck, the things you can or plan to do with it, but don't beat yourself up trying to sell him/her on red. ( I know, not quite the same, but you get the point)

I'm not saying go out of your way to blow it off. But unless they actively ask Osteo instead of Allo, I really think the question is just as interested in why you to be A physician.

If you have something great you can put in that focuses on Osteopathy, that's great. But don't beat yourself up and water down what would be an other wise solid essay.
 
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