Has anyone ever worked in retail, made a mistake, and then had a manager snap at them or chew them out? This has happened to me a few times and each time I freak out internally, constantly comparing it to my future med school life. Instead of a manager it’ll be an attending and instead of a silly mistake handling clothing it’ll be people’s lives. I know these are probably pre-M1 nerves getting to me, but I can’t help but worry. Is this normal or should I get myself to therapy quick before classes start? (Kidding, kind of).
A lot of it's nerves, some of it's probably lack of self confidence, and a bit of it's a normal person's normal desire to do the right thing. Don't freak out. I do have a couple points of advice, though.
First, learn to accept yourself as an imperfect person. That doesn't mean to accept your imperfections! You should constantly look for ways to improve and you should never become complacent. But you're an imperfect person just like the rest of us and you need to be OK with that. Don't hold yourself to an unreasonable standard that you wouldn't expect of a colleague.
Second, understand that you
will screw up and it
will hurt someone. That's the truth about medicine, and you need to be OK with that, too. When you screw up, you can either collapse into a nervous wreck or you can learn and grow from the experience. That's your decision, and your choice will determine whether you become a better doctor.
Third, you're going to interact with many different personalities in any work environment. You'll have some attendings who criticize and blame whenever you mess up, and you need to develop the resilience to take the lessons you can and let the rest roll off your back. You'll have other attendings who'll instruct and mentor you. Don't let their pleasant personalities lead you to complacency.
Fourth, remember that niceness doesn't mean good instruction. You may have attendings who're grade A jerks but incredible teachers. Learn all you can from them: learn the medical principles they teach you, and learn what kind of attending you do or don't want to be.
Good luck as you start school! Keep your eye on the prize and remember that the payoff is worth the price.
