if you've wanted to pursue a career in medicine for as long as you can remember, and it's only recently that you've become dismayed, then you should still go ahead and apply. the fact is, perspectives change easily; one of the things about med school is that most people come in having an idea of what they want to do, but a lot of them don't follow through... (this isn't because they can't, but just that priorities change... an M4 told me once, that after you go through the rigors of those 4 years, it's easy to not want to put yourself through another 6 years of torment in a competitive residency, and then crazy hours/high stress for the rest of your life in a demanding speciality.) so it's really likely that your opinion of medicine and surgery in general will change completely once you are in medical school.
coincidentally, i spent yesterday afternoon at my preceptor's clinic, and found out that he had originally gone through dental school (4 years), gotten board certified to practice dental surgery (2 years), then realized that what he really wants to do is Family Practice, and so headed right back to medical school for that sole purpose (4 years), and then went into residency for it (3 years). to me, it's crazy (most people would be perfectly content with just one of those degrees)! he spent 6 years thinking he wants to be a DDS and yet, was still willing to put in 7 more years just so he could be a family physician after a change of heart. he told me, "at the end, it was all worth it." so my point is, don't be discouraged, because self-realizations and epiphanies can occur when you least expect it.
besides, try to think of med school not as the means for getting that MD attached to your name, but rather as a way to further your own knowledge. medicine can be anything you want it to be, and it's perfectly acceptable to not practice at all or go into another field afterwards. it really ought to be that drive for learning about the human body (and hence, an understanding of our own humanity) that should be the goal; this is a privilege that most people in the world could never possibly have. so if you feel this way, then you ought to at least go to med school; the experience alone would be very worthwhile.
